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EMILY BLUNTS
Jan 1, 2005



Crowley posted:

I must be remembering wrong then. We use new computers where I work.

Must suck not having a degauss button!

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Inspector_666
Oct 7, 2003

I'm close to six feet, I like to think.

Coffee Quack posted:

Must suck not having a degauss button!

I do miss a good degauss.

Bieeardo
Aug 21, 2000

Someone bold, someone blue, someone borrowed, someone new...


I almost had a heart attack the first time I pressed the degauss button.

After that it was a ton of fun to do it to friends' machines, and watch them nearly have coronaries too.

FISHMANPET
Mar 3, 2007



A friend and I discovered the hard (and fun) way what a car subwoofer with a huge magnet in it can do to a CRT monitor. Coincidentally, that's when I learned what degaussing could actually do, and probably the only time I've ever needed.

EMILY BLUNTS
Jan 1, 2005



As for Zen error messages, apparently this is from Lightwave (yes, newtek)

b0lt
Apr 28, 2005


darnzen posted:

My favorite is the PHP white screen. No error, just... silence.

Followed by swearing and opening a terminal to check the apache error logs.

Parse error: syntax error, unexpected T_PAAMAYIM_NEKUDOTAYIM

evil_bunnY
Apr 2, 2003



pixaal posted:

Because what if you don't want to use a keyboard.
Also because PS/2 isn't hot-plug, buddy.

angrytech
Jun 26, 2009


evil_bunnY posted:

Also because PS/2 isn't hot-plug, buddy.

we covered that

EMILY BLUNTS
Jan 1, 2005



DeFacto Hotplug Ports

(all of them until a controller fries)

Small White Dragon
Nov 23, 2007

No relation.

b0lt posted:

Parse error: syntax error, unexpected T_PAAMAYIM_NEKUDOTAYIM
I just want to pronounce this as "Hakuna Matata"

evil_bunnY
Apr 2, 2003



Coffee Quack posted:

DeFacto Hotplug Ports

(all of them until a controller fries)
Hahaha yeah. I've seen so many people act all surprised after killing a port, too

rscott
Dec 10, 2009


Inspector_71 posted:

I do miss a good degauss.

I got a week of detention for getting everyone in my compsci class to degauss their monitors simultaneously

Johnny Mash
May 21, 2007
I hope to see you soon in La La Land

Auto-renumbering BASIC lines by a huge step factor on a BBC Acorn netted the concise error of:

Silly

Pope Guilty
Nov 6, 2006

The human animal is a beautiful and terrible creature, capable of limitless compassion and unfathomable cruelty.

rscott posted:

I got a week of detention for getting everyone in my compsci class to degauss their monitors simultaneously

I don't get it; why would that be a problem?

dpbjinc
Dec 30, 2009

Ships were made for sinking;
Whiskey made for drinking;
If we were made of cellophane
We'd all get stinking drunk much faster!


Because it would blow the breaker in the room.

~Coxy
Dec 9, 2003

R.I.P. Inter-OS Sass - b.2000AD d.2003AD

Who the gently caress thought this would be an acceptable limitation in modern software (yes yes I know Excel is a bunch of hacks around a COM object)



Of course, the only reason I ran into this is because of this other dumb (but slightly less dumb to be fair) limitation:

When trying to sort data in a table with some merged cells:

LorneReams
Jun 27, 2003
I'm bizarre

~Coxy posted:

Who the gently caress thought this would be an acceptable limitation in modern software (yes yes I know Excel is a bunch of hacks around a COM object)



Of course, the only reason I ran into this is because of this other dumb (but slightly less dumb to be fair) limitation:

When trying to sort data in a table with some merged cells:


I never quite understood this either and it seems I spend a lot of time working around poo poo JUST like this.

Thanks Ants
May 21, 2004

Tune in and turn on to the ultimate digital media experience!


gently caress Excel for making me dick around to open two windows side-by-side

LorneReams
Jun 27, 2003
I'm bizarre

Caged posted:

gently caress Excel for making me dick around to open two windows side-by-side

I still cant do this reliably and then I'm always afraid I'm not going to save the correct thing as I forget which "stack" of docs are associated with each exe. Save or close, gently caress me if I know!

FISHMANPET
Mar 3, 2007



Caged posted:

gently caress Excel for making me dick around to open two windows side-by-side

I have four monitors Excel, don't be a bitch.

Oddhair
Mar 21, 2004



Well, you can middle-click on Win7 taskbar buttons to open a new instance of the software, I just learned that last week mucking about with XML files for SIP phones. Works with Excel just fine.

Also, the cleaning lady got a little too vigorous with the vacuum and knocked a coworker's machine around a bit:



Ahh, yes, the old Becuming Windogs dialog...

Oddhair fucked around with this message at May 22, 2012 around 14:40

Lum
Aug 13, 2003



Oddhair posted:

Well, you can middle-click on Win7 taskbar buttons to open a new instance of the software, I just learned that last week mucking about with XML files for SIP phones. Works with Excel just fine.

Also, the cleaning lady got a little too vigorous with the vacuum and knocked a coworker's machine around a bit:



Ahh, yes, the old Becuming Windogs dialog...

This, of course needs to be followed up with ye olde classic

~Coxy
Dec 9, 2003

R.I.P. Inter-OS Sass - b.2000AD d.2003AD

Devenv.png - have to make sure our dialogs fit into 320x240!
No you can't see the full name of the project, no you can't increase the width of the dialog or the combo box, you have to add it and see which one it ended up being.
Why?
Because gently caress you, that's why.



edit: you can actually make the dialog wider. You just have to close the combo box first for some reason.

Yaos
Feb 22, 2003

She is a cat of significant gravy.

That's pretty drat lazy; since you can set the combobox size you can also set the size to automatically fit the longest name. Using a combobox for something that is that long is pretty stupid though, no way to sort projects, and don't make too many projects or you're scrolling for a long time. A list dialog on the left that can be sorted with the project properties on the right make more sense, they would gently caress that up too since they would just use the default settings and not give a poo poo what it looks like.

Buff Skeleton
Oct 24, 2005



Lum posted:

This, of course needs to be followed up with ye olde classic



These are hilarious but how does this even happen? Assuming it isn't a joke or something, it's not just a simple letter transposition.

Sonic Dude
May 6, 2009


Waffnuffly posted:

These are hilarious but how does this even happen? Assuming it isn't a joke or something, it's not just a simple letter transposition.
Bad RAM usually. If there's a wiring problem or some stuck bits, then the wrong character can appear.

"Windogs," for example, comes from the fact that an ASCII "w" is 01110111 and "g" is 01100111 - only a single-bit difference.
"Wandows" is the same - "i" is 01101001 and "a" is 01100001.

Buff Skeleton
Oct 24, 2005



Ah, gotcha. Interesting. That's actually kinda cool in a way, though obviously not what you want to happen.

thehustler
Apr 17, 2004

I am very curious about this little crescendo


Sonic Dude posted:

Bad RAM usually. If there's a wiring problem or some stuck bits, then the wrong character can appear.

"Windogs," for example, comes from the fact that an ASCII "w" is 01110111 and "g" is 01100111 - only a single-bit difference.
"Wandows" is the same - "i" is 01101001 and "a" is 01100001.

I always knew it was bad RAM, but never knew the ins and outs of it. That was a cool post, thanks

Moey
Oct 22, 2010



Very helpful message indeed.


Snipeo
Mar 29, 2004
Happy Camper

This just made me go....



.....whoa.

Yaos
Feb 22, 2003

She is a cat of significant gravy.

I posted this one a long time ago on The Daily WTF.


For the blind among us, here's the first sentence. "Your internal battery has been keep long time no learning."

nzspambot
Mar 26, 2010



Caged posted:

gently caress Excel for making me dick around to open two windows side-by-side

would you believe that I think Office 2012 fixes this problem

Jedi Knight Luigi
Jul 13, 2009

You think this post is FUNNY?!




"Changing elements in the cut can delete children."

Before you say 'well maybe it means something else idiomatically,' one of the comments on facebook for this image was (in German of course) "At least it's child-friendly..."

Zilla32167
May 1, 2009


Jedi Knight Luigi posted:



"Changing elements in the cut can delete children."

Before you say 'well maybe it means something else idiomatically,' one of the comments on facebook for this image was (in German of course) "At least it's child-friendly..."
Seems like a perfectly reasonable warning from a CAD.

pixaal
Jan 8, 2004

God I fucking love Diablo 3 gold, it even paid for this shitty title

You think they would have some native speakers make sure it sounds okay, you could probably get that done free posting on an internet forum.

I almost think its backwards to hire a native speaker from the source language like many places do. You end up with poo poo like this. Sure you might not get some figure of speech, but for the love of god why would you use one in an error message?

As someone that programs as a hobby I get what a child means, but I'm not sure people using CAD are required to. Even if most would, its not apparent or needed to actually understand how to use the product, so it's going to get lost on the self taught people.

Factory Factory
Mar 19, 2010

Oh dear, oh my,
that shouldn't be said.


pixaal posted:

I almost think its backwards to hire a native speaker from the source language like many places do.

It pretty much is, if I recall correctly. Ideal professional translation involves hiring a native speaker of the target language who is also fluent in the work's original language.

pixaal
Jan 8, 2004

God I fucking love Diablo 3 gold, it even paid for this shitty title

Factory Factory posted:

It pretty much is, if I recall correctly. Ideal professional translation involves hiring a native speaker of the target language who is also fluent in the work's original language.

Other way around, my roomate majored in Japanese to translate anime then realized he couldn't do that because they wanted native Japanese to translate to English. He switched to programmer rather then pick up a few more languages and you know actually translate business deals, or international treaties or something. Waste of 3 years, but its his money not mine.

I guess computers could be the other way around, and how you say, but some of the hosed up errors we are seeing? no way. Its hacks who claim they know what they are talking about and using google translate to do their job.

LeftistMuslimObama
Jan 6, 2012

GOD DAMMIT RICKIE

Zilla32167 posted:

Seems like a perfectly reasonable warning from a CAD.

The humor is that in this case the word for "children" only means children in the young human sense, not in the "antecedents of an object" sense. It's one of those words that's multi-use in English but not in other languages.

~Coxy
Dec 9, 2003

R.I.P. Inter-OS Sass - b.2000AD d.2003AD



Nice use of a checkbox (and the corresponding extra code needed to validate, and to show another loving dialog) where a radio button would suffice.

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BrainWeasel
May 8, 2007

I'll reattach your arm when I hit fucking Level 2!

Oh, I've got one of these from an Epson printer long ago.

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