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DarkCrawler
Apr 6, 2009

by vyelkin
Loving the fractured France and unified Germany as opposed the other way around. Did the English rebellion a while back cause France's downfall?

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Ras Het
May 23, 2007

when I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child - but now I am a man.
Christian Cuman? That seems to happen quite often...

Cowcatcher
Dec 23, 2005

OUR PEOPLE WERE BORN OF THE SKY

Ras Het posted:

Christian Cuman? That seems to happen quite often...

A lot of them did convert, also a large part got absorbed into catholic Hungary

Tomn
Aug 23, 2007

And the angel said unto him
"Stop hitting yourself. Stop hitting yourself."
But lo he could not. For the angel was hitting him with his own hands
Islam is retreating! SELL DINARS! Azerbaijan has kicked out the Crusaders! BUY DINARS! The Mongols have conquered! SELL DINARS! Tanrivermis has conquered Egypt! BUY DINARS!

BUY! SELL! BUY! SELL!

Popy
Feb 19, 2008

At this rate we will be the King of Germany in 50 years.

Ilanin
May 31, 2009

Smarter than the average Blair.

Tomn posted:

Islam is retreating! SELL DINARS! Azerbaijan has kicked out the Crusaders! BUY DINARS! The Mongols have conquered! SELL DINARS! Tanrivermis has conquered Egypt! BUY DINARS!

BUY! SELL! BUY! SELL!

And to think you call yourself a muezzin.

Rogue0071
Dec 8, 2009

Grey Hunter's next target.

Ras Het posted:

Christian Cuman? That seems to happen quite often...

This came up in IRC, apparently the (Orthodox) Alans acquired the title and broke off from Georgia.

sniper4625
Sep 26, 2009

Loyal to the hEnd

Tomn posted:

Islam is retreating! SELL DINARS! Azerbaijan has kicked out the Crusaders! BUY DINARS! The Mongols have conquered! SELL DINARS! Tanrivermis has conquered Egypt! BUY DINARS!

BUY! SELL! BUY! SELL!

Seeing as how it's unfeasible to take large amounts of metal-based currency across our constant travels, I'm introducing a new currency - BitDinar. Any takers?

The Merry Marauder
Apr 4, 2009

"But she goes not abroad, in search of monsters to destroy. She is the well-wisher to the freedom and independence of all. She is the champion and vindicator only of her own."

sniper4625 posted:

Seeing as how it's unfeasible to take large amounts of metal-based currency across our constant travels, I'm introducing a new currency - BitDinar. Any takers?

I think Dinar's Club would be still more efficient.

Lord Hypnostache
Nov 6, 2009

OATHBREAKER
I see a purple province in Morocco. Who is that? I'm guessing Wales, but I'm not going to be too surprised to learn it's Byzantium or Muscowy.

Dr. Tough
Oct 22, 2007

Lord Hypnostache posted:

I see a purple province in Morocco. Who is that? I'm guessing Wales, but I'm not going to be too surprised to learn it's Byzantium or Muscowy.

I think Muscowy might actually be part of Byzantium, they sometimes become vassals since they're both Orthodox and Muscowy is a principality level state and Byzantium is kingdom level.

Wiz
May 16, 2004

Nap Ghost

Dr. Tough posted:

I think Muscowy might actually be part of Byzantium, they sometimes become vassals since they're both Orthodox and Muscowy is a principality level state and Byzantium is kingdom level.

No, Muscowy is independent.

Also, the purple in Morocco is Anjou.

Wiz
May 16, 2004

Nap Ghost


Chapter 10: Swarm of Locusts (1270 - 1280)

Tanvermis' Abbasid wife dies in childbirth, and he takes for his new first wife the daughter of the Ayyubid Sultan of Egypt, to strengthen the legitimacy of his rule over Egypt.


A distant cousin who had held the Beydom of Dihistan as vassal of the Khan passes away, and Tanrivermis suddenly finds himself ruling over a piece in land in Persia.


The quiet, peaceful years continue and the prosperity of Egypt continues to grow.


That peace is brought to a sudden end as the Pope declares the Fifth Crusade to reclaim Alexandria.


The Fifth Crusade is being led and sponsored by the pious and prestigious King of Naples, Sicily and Lombardy, Robert de Hauteville. The Hautevilles have expanded their empire to encompass almost all of Italy, and Robert dreams of re-establishing the Roman Empire with himself as Emperor. The Kings of Wales, Aragon and Bohemia join him in declaring war on Tanrivermis.


The first Crusaders land on the shores of Al Alameyn in 1274 - a small spearhead force of no more than 5000 men, they are easily defeated.


The next force to land is more serious, and Tanrivermis calls out the army of Alexandria to defeat it, with Marshal Muhammad at its head.



Despite defeat after defeat, the Crusaders continue to pour in like a swarm of locusts come to devour the land of Egypt. In spring of 1275, a large Italian army succeeds in defeating Tanvermis at Al Alameyn, forcing him to withdraw to Alexadnria.


As the Crusaders take control over Al Alameyn, Tanvermis regroups and calls on more troops from the interior parts of his domain.


He counter-attacks, driving the Crusaders before him and retaking Al Alameyn.



King Robert's response to this is to send an even larger army against Alexandria itself. 17000 Italians and Aragonese make landfall in 1276, and Tanvermis is forced to fight a desperate defensive battle outside the very walls of Alexandria.


Italian knights charge into his right flank, and as Tanrivermis rushes there to rally his panicking troops, he is struck in the chest by an arrow and falls from his steed.


Seeing their revered and beloved general fall, Tanvermis' troops give up a great roar of anger, throwing themselves at the Italians in an attack so vicious that the Crusaders' ranks crumble and they break and run, thousands of their troops cut down as they try to flee.


Though he has won a great victory, Tanrivermis is in no shape to lead anymore armies, and the constant fighting is devastating the stability and economy of his realm.


His enemy, King Robert, is a fanatic who will clearly not stop until he has taken Egypt, and as long as he has the Pope's ear, the crusade will continue. A plan begins to form in Tanrivermis' head. He sends an embassy led by his cousin Ertan to Naples under the guise of discussing peace terms, giving every sign that he is prepared to cede Alexandria and the coastline in exchange for being allowed to continue ruling the interior.


The embassy however, is just a ruse. Travelling with Ertan is one of the few remaining men of the assassins sect - fanatical and highly skilled killers who have no expectations of surviving their missions. As King Robert comes to greet the embassy, the assassin leaps at him, stabbing him in the throat before his guards can react. Robert's guards cut down Ertan and all members of the embassy, but the damage is done.


King Robert is dead, and his far less prestigious and pious brother will have enough to worry about holding his large empire together. Indeed, just a few months after the death of Robert, an envoy arrives from Naples offering peace.



With the Italians out of the fair, the Crusade enters a phase of low activity. The occasional band of Aragonese or Welsh crusaders continue to harrass Egypt's shores, but are easily defeated by Marshal Muhammed.


In 1278, the Knights Templar join in the Crusade in an attempt to rekindle it, and Tanvermis sees a chance to finally strike back at his enemies.


He sends Marshal Muhammed with an army of 5000 men across the sea to make landfall at Ascalon. The Templars meet him on the field and fight bravely but are ultimately defeated. All members of the Templar Order captured by Muhammed are brought in chains to Cairo and executed.



This, however, turns out to be a mistake. Among the executed were a nephew of the King of England, who had previously expressed little interest in the Crusade, preferring instead to continue his wars in France. Enraged by the death of his relative, he throws the full weight of his Kingdom into the Crusade.


A large English and Welsh army makes landfall in Al Alameyn in autumn of 1279, and despite superior numbers the Egyptian defenders are defeated.



As Tanvermis once again calls on the armies of the interior to throw back the invaders, he does so with an army that has already between reduced from fifty thousand to thirty-five thousand men during the first phase of the Crusade. The question is, for all his strategic genius, how long can he hold out unaided?


One thing is clear. This Crusade is far from over.




Wiz fucked around with this message at 19:33 on Oct 7, 2011

Zebrin
Mar 12, 2010

Chopping trees down and making elves cry.
Your course is clear. You must convert the papal states!

Nice holding out against so many foes. let's see how long it lasts.

Terrifying Effigies
Oct 22, 2008

Problems look mighty small from 150 miles up.

Looks like the ilkhan is having trouble keeping his conquests together.

Too bad there's a bunch of unwashed Franks dirtying your shores.



(((I'm rooting for the Kingdom of Italy to make it till EU3 though, I'd love to see where it would lead)))

Viola the Mad
Feb 13, 2010
What kind of education has Tanvermis given his children? He seems like the sort to send 'em all to War College in preparation for the battle against the Il-Khanate, and I know you usually try to make gameplay decisions in character.

Wiz
May 16, 2004

Nap Ghost

Viola the Mad posted:

What kind of education has Tanvermis given his children? He seems like the sort to send 'em all to War College in preparation for the battle against the Il-Khanate, and I know you usually try to make gameplay decisions in character.

Yeah, war all around.

Kem Rixen
Aug 6, 2007

With this turnip I am become death, the destroyer of worlds!
Is Andalusia in southern Iberia Christian? If so does that mean the reconquista is over?

Wiz
May 16, 2004

Nap Ghost

Kem Rixen posted:

Is Andalusia in southern Iberia Christian? If so does that mean the reconquista is over?

Yes, and pretty much. There's one random sheikdom that has survived somehow but that's it for Muslims in Spain.

Klowns
May 13, 2009

Laugh At Me Will They?
Nice assassination play, his impressive intrigue stat plays into the success rate of that right?

Wiz
May 16, 2004

Nap Ghost

Klowns posted:

Nice assassination play, his impressive intrigue stat plays into the success rate of that right?

Yep.

LordBaxter
Sep 7, 2009

I finally managed to make everybody like me, if only for one day
How the hell are you managing to stay in the black during all this? Whenever I played this game I'd just end up being put into debt by one war and never get a chance to recover thanks to the constant new wars being declared against me. In the end I usually just cheated myself enough money that I never went into debt, to put me on an even footing to the AI.

Wiz
May 16, 2004

Nap Ghost

LordBaxter posted:

How the hell are you managing to stay in the black during all this? Whenever I played this game I'd just end up being put into debt by one war and never get a chance to recover thanks to the constant new wars being declared against me. In the end I usually just cheated myself enough money that I never went into debt, to put me on an even footing to the AI.

I had 1500 gold saved up before the Crusade hit (was planning to spend it on a castle). I also demobilize all my troops whenever I've chased off the latest wave of crusaders. Finally, sometimes random Counts and Dukes offer me huge amounts of gold to make peace.

sniper4625
Sep 26, 2009

Loyal to the hEnd
Out of curiosity, what's the current dynasty of Germany? The fact that they're as big as they are is nothing short of amazing to me.

Konstantin
Jun 20, 2005
And the Lord said, "Look, they are one people, and they have all one language; and this is only the beginning of what they will do; nothing that they propose to do will now be impossible for them.

Wiz posted:

Yes, and pretty much. There's one random sheikdom that has survived somehow but that's it for Muslims in Spain.

A pity, that means that we probably won't get a Muslim America like we had in the Germany LP.

az
Dec 2, 2005

This is a really great LP, any chance you could upload the mods you're using?

Frionnel
May 7, 2010

Friends are what make testing worth it.
So, do we have an escape route planned yet?

zetamind2000
Nov 6, 2007

I'm an alien.

Frionnel posted:

So, do we have an escape route planned yet?

And can it be the single Muslim county still left in Spain?

sniper4625
Sep 26, 2009

Loyal to the hEnd

az posted:

This is a really great LP, any chance you could upload the mods you're using?

Goddamnit Wiz, how many of us must beg for your generosity before you can find it in your shriveled Swedish heart to share?

Conskill
May 7, 2007

I got an 'F' in Geometry.

Frionnel posted:

So, do we have an escape route planned yet?

After being chased out of Egypt, the dynasty will regather its strength in the newly conquered Sultanate of Ireland.

Eiba
Jul 26, 2007


Well, I doubt the crusaders will be able to get us all the way back in Dihistan. We'll be perfectly safe there on the shores of the familiar Caspian Sea. Maybe, if God continues to subject us to His wild mood swings, we'll even inherit the Il Khanate or something.

Is getting help out of the question? Syria's part of our dynasty still, isn't it? I'd hope they'd be predisposed to saving their own kin from the vile Christian hordes! They've got both practical and familial reasons to help us.

Rejected Fate
Aug 5, 2011

And of course to bring us down from our conquest of Egypt, a crusade comes along. I can only wonder what the next up swing will be. We inherit Syria? Wouldn't surprise me.

Also it looks like Wales only has one province. They can afford to send troops at us? Weird. I've never seen Wales break free from England for long, so I don't bear much hope for them. Would certainly be interesting to see, though.

Also is that Poland that takes up a province in Scandanavia? Sweden doesn't look too good.

LordBaxter
Sep 7, 2009

I finally managed to make everybody like me, if only for one day
I wish someone would do an LP of this and other paradox games where they walk through every little detail and game mechanic, and also explain what stats are taken into account when games are converted. I try to have the balance of power in all my provinces be split between the nobles and the burghers, with the remainder being the peasants because to my mind that would have sliders be further towards innovative and plutocracy. Maybe I should just try and get a game to 1400 before I start worrying about how it'd turn out in EU3.

LordBaxter
Sep 7, 2009

I finally managed to make everybody like me, if only for one day
This is loving impossible, within 7 years of the game start I've gone from king of castille to king of castille and leon with a debt of 1000 gold (earning around 6 gold a month, giving me literal decades of debt) and at war with the entirety of muslim spain and most of muslim africa too, gently caress this game it is loving impossible, there is no explanation on what half of everything does and if anything does happen it's for the most bullshit arbitrary reasons.

Verus
Jun 3, 2011

AUT INVENIAM VIAM AUT FACIAM
That world map looks remarkably messy, Wiz. There's still a long way to go, but do you plan on doing much clean up to make the borders neater come EU3?


Also:

quote:

gently caress this game it is loving impossible, there is no explanation on what half of everything does and if anything does happen it's for the most bullshit arbitrary reasons.


Welcome to Crusader Kings!

Boldor
Sep 4, 2004
King of the Yeeks
Would you be able to revive the Fatimid Caliphate? I suppose that may require that it not be still surviving in scattered bits around you; I can't tell if that's the case or not.

Does it even make sense to ask if you can revive a Caliphate in the way you can revive a kingdom?

eating only apples
Dec 12, 2009

Shall we dance?
Thanks a lot, Wiz. You've got me playing EUIII again and I (still) have no idea what I'm doing. I played for a while as Ryazan and got steamrollered by Muscowy and Lithuania. Now I'm Castille because it seemed to be the easiest one and I'm still losing money and can't make more and Aragon won't loving accept my marriage proposal. I hate this game :argh:

Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

~*4 LIFE*~

LordBaxter posted:

gently caress this game it is loving impossible, there is no explanation on what half of everything does and if anything does happen it's for the most bullshit arbitrary reasons.

My first game, I started as Duke of Munster and ended up King of Ireland, Scotland, Wales and 2/3rds of the Iberian peninsula :smug:

But seriously, most things are explained by tooltips if you hover your mouse over an icon. The only thing I don't really get is how your division of power in a province effects anything.

strong bird
May 12, 2009

Boldor posted:

Would you be able to revive the Fatimid Caliphate? I suppose that may require that it not be still surviving in scattered bits around you; I can't tell if that's the case or not.

Does it even make sense to ask if you can revive a Caliphate in the way you can revive a kingdom?

It would be more along the lines of establishing a new caliphate, unless you're from the Fatimid lineage

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Mu Cow
Oct 26, 2003

LordBaxter posted:

This is loving impossible, within 7 years of the game start I've gone from king of castille to king of castille and leon with a debt of 1000 gold (earning around 6 gold a month, giving me literal decades of debt) and at war with the entirety of muslim spain and most of muslim africa too, gently caress this game it is loving impossible, there is no explanation on what half of everything does and if anything does happen it's for the most bullshit arbitrary reasons.

I thought CK was easy. In my first game, I started at the duke of Northumberland and ended up conquering the whole map by the late 1300's. Spain is a terrible starting position as, I think, the Muslims start with some advantages. It's better to start elsewhere and work up to fighting the Muslims. Conquering Spain was by far the hardest part of my first game.

I discovered a great strategy. Declare war on a kingdom with a ton of vassals, then claim the titles of any of the vassals that come to the king's aid. After a couple of battles, offer peace to the vassals by renouncing the claim on their title, but demand they become your vassal. Typically, this requires a really low war score, so they usually agree to it. If you have a bad chancellor, this deal sometimes gives a negative score, so you could even be losing and still do this. Continue this by then declaring war on any remaining vassals and doing the same thing. Once all the vassals are yours, you can either conquer the now much weaker kingdom or just take your gains and go home.

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