Tickle Me Chelmno posted:EXT. LIBYAN DESERT - NIGHT
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:15 |
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| # ? May 18, 2013 22:01 |
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Meursault Horny posted:he thought the mods had like a big conspiracy with the san diego police or something, he's really cool Rich people are harder to buy off or scare into submission with the threat of police brutality. They can afford really awesome attorneys and/or to pay your bribes. Where did this rich/poor thing come from just now? You're not seeing the lobsters, are you? I'm using a bit of sleep deprivation torture vernacular, there. This conspiracy has nothing to do with lobsters. Why did you bring that up? You know that I'm a better interrogator than you because I've been heated and quenched in the burning oil of this poo poo for over six years, right? That's roughly how long I've been mining your dudes for intel. Every engagement that we've had wherein you've tried some ridiculous bullshit that passes for a clandestine operation in an effort to entrap or otherwise silence me I have spent casually digging around in the brains of your guys. Learning about your organizational structures. Your attitudes. Your dominant beliefs. Your common formative experiences. Your favored tactics. The capabilities and performance metrics (group delay, etc.) of your intelligence network. Your weaknesses. I'm pretty observant and know how to run a list of questions in the format of light banter. What happened to your predecessors, anyway? I am the lobster, you son of a bitch. Welcome to my world.
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:15 |
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ok lol
Rip my nigga
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If I can land punches I do okay (I once played the 'trade right crosses to the shoulder' game with this 6' tall semi-fat kid back in undergrad, I'm stronger now. He lasted three. I didn't bruise. His shoulder turned black with two angry red spots in the center with radiating red lines away from them. My knuckles. He also bounced off of the fridge behind him (he flinched) and started crying after #3, but honorably bowed out. Left a dent. Part of that was me, as I did connect well, so he really flew. Coordination Coordination Coordination.), but reach is reach. This isn't me plotting to beat up a police station, just observations on how I'd probably do in a hand to hand confrontation.
I Have Sigs Off |
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:16 |
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They tried that in austin, and I've said 'OMG OMG THEY TRIED TO KILL ME ON THE ROAD' so many times that if they did it again it wouldn't work out so well for them. People would think to investigate that. I'd also have to actually be intoxicated behind the wheel. I don't think they have enough swing to rig an autopsy. They might be able to prevent one, but... well, who knows.
It would actually be relatively difficult. I drive a car with a pretty good crash rating and carry trauma gear. Yes, they are reptiles. In spirit, anyway. I'm pretty sure they won't freeze to death in 50 degree weather. That would be really convenient. And I am sure that there are more. This appears to be epic mondo huge. It's like the green giant guy stepped on me and I've been stuck to the stinking crest of this guy's right arch for years. I'm saying they hosed up, did a lot of criminal poo poo, tried to bribe me, did even more criminal poo poo, tried to kill me, and... years later here we are. It's almost like a few seasons of the dukes of hazzard except more murderous. This is what it would be like if the duke boys weren't white. This is just horrible.
I Have Sigs Off |
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:19 |
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edit: Okay, I have to fess up. Their top gun dude actually blasted a dook into the pants during a particularly high-G maneuver. I thought their people were mentally invulnerable killing machines but apparently I am wrong. It's actually a REALLY good sign. "The brain bug, it's afraid!" / "If it bleeds we can kill it." good. It means that they aren't metal all the way through. That would have been really hard. This hints at a quasi-human 'moral cost function'. It actually does have some relevance. Oh yeah, I'm also +1 on 'having stared down police conspiracy firearms aimed directly at my cranium unflinching' score. That has to be some kind of MW2-style achievement. Pocket pistol in a makeshift jackass holster this time, in the hands of the pants shitter. Too bad emergency hemostats don't work on gunshot wounds to the brain. I had a small level IIIa concealed Kevlar shield with me but I doubt that I could have raised it in time to foil her shot and escape. Given the depth of surveillance savvy she exhibited she also would have known about it and known to aim around. Sort of worthless except as a way of protecting my vitals during a dash. Anyway, all of this makes guessing at their objectives a lot easier. If they were ACTUAL fundamentalists, well, much bigger problem. Crazy people are harder to predict. Sane criminals much less so.
This is would have been actually enormously good news edit: had it come sooner. They will be would have been easier to fight over longer time scales given what I now know about their cost functions. Too late, I'm afraid. My time is almost up. So, military career advice! Please. I need to be as butch as possible and I've done what I can, but at the end of the day I still started with smoking nerd meat. I never lied about my numbers. I don't have time for that poo poo. I'm also not insane, so don't worry about me freaking out on you or anything like that. Sincerely.
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:20 |
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Muppet Scabies posted:Rich people are harder to buy off or scare into submission with the threat of police brutality. They can afford really awesome attorneys and/or to pay your bribes. Where did this rich/poor thing come from just now? You're not seeing the lobsters, are you? I'm using a bit of sleep deprivation torture vernacular, there. This conspiracy has nothing to do with lobsters. Why did you bring that up? You know that I'm a better interrogator than you because I've been heated and quenched in the burning oil of this poo poo for over six years, right? That's roughly how long I've been mining your dudes for intel. |
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:21 |
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If you interfere with my life in a destructive manner I will make yours a living hell. Stalking still isn't legal. This is a solemn promise. You need to ask yourself if I am so far gone as to tolerate bullshit like that. Based on the actions you are suggesting you think I am, yet I obviously am not.
I'm a retard. You're already doing this. You know what your big giveaway is? YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND HOW THE POST EDIT SYSTEM WORKS. EDITED POSTS BEAR A TIMESTAMP. I guess if you pay the SA people enough you can destroy or contaminate posts I've made here by editing them yourselves. People won't be able to tell that it wasn't me. That's very depressing, and it suddenly dawns on me that you'll angle for this. Nobody ever thinks to archive posts on a forums site. They always assume that they will remain static. I think that I might be straight hosed by crooked goddamned cops. poo poo, guys. I didn't want to die like this. Why doesn't anybody stop these things? Seriously, me? gently caress it and gently caress you too. I'll find some way to end this.
I Have Sigs Off |
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:21 |
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Muppet Scabies posted:
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:26 |
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http://forums.somethingawful.com/sh...40&pagenumber=3
find any wordy post and see how hosed up and crazy this guy is. cool party.
I Have Sigs Off |
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:29 |
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The art of war and the mechanics of combat are nothing new to me. I've seen the movies. I've played the games. Now I am the guy in the game. I have undone a lifetime of brainwashing; the dumbing down of people that is prevalent it today's society and unlocked the parts of my brain they never told you about. Thus I have the mental prowess of the Protoss, yet the battle hardened heart of the Terran. I have gone from nothing but a FOB and a loving patch of minerals to a massive army of bloodthirsty killers that are eager and ready to take my orders at any given moment, pouring out of countless facilities in coldly calculated cycles. Just need to get those lazy haji fuckers in the engineering tent to get my +2 ammo in production so I have the edge in my future sniper battles.
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:32 |
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blazeing w hitler posted:The art of war and the mechanics of combat are nothing new to me. I've seen the movies. I've played the games. Now I am the guy in the game. I have undone a lifetime of brainwashing; the dumbing down of people that is prevalent it today's society and unlocked the parts of my brain they never told you about. Thus I have the mental prowess of the Protoss, yet the battle hardened heart of the Terran. I have gone from nothing but a FOB and a loving patch of minerals to a massive army of bloodthirsty killers that are eager and ready to take my orders at any given moment, pouring out of countless facilities in coldly calculated cycles. Just need to get those lazy haji fuckers in the engineering tent to get my +2 ammo in production so I have the edge in my future sniper battles.
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:34 |
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Tickle Me Chelmno posted:http://forums.somethingawful.com/sh...40&pagenumber=3 i read 1 and yes hes crazy. glad hes killing arabs, tho. pretty funy situation in general. |
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:36 |
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blazeing w hitler posted:The art of war and the mechanics of combat are nothing new to me. I've seen the movies. I've played the games. Now I am the guy in the game. I have undone a lifetime of brainwashing; the dumbing down of people that is prevalent it today's society and unlocked the parts of my brain they never told you about. Thus I have the mental prowess of the Protoss, yet the battle hardened heart of the Terran. I have gone from nothing but a FOB and a loving patch of minerals to a massive army of bloodthirsty killers that are eager and ready to take my orders at any given moment, pouring out of countless facilities in coldly calculated cycles. Just need to get those lazy haji fuckers in the engineering tent to get my +2 ammo in production so I have the edge in my future sniper battles.
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:39 |
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Haomasexual posted:i read 1 and yes hes crazy. glad hes killing arabs, tho. pretty funy situation in general. I think so too |
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:40 |
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blazeing w hitler posted:out side snipeing some reb bels
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:40 |
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Meursault Horny posted:40gb, bitches
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:41 |
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hahahah this is hosed up and cool
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:43 |
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tripwire posted:40gb, bitches lol
I Have Sigs Off |
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:45 |
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The hitmarkers. Those blinking X's that surround the crosshair when my shots are landed on the enemy. I now have no more need for them -- just mists and mists of blood from every single loving shot of my 7.62 NATO (5.56 caliber is good for suppression and close engagements but I'm going for the one shot route here). No cpu, no amount of RAM, can handle the intensity of combat.
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 00:49 |
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I am the walrus. What walrus. There is no walrus, there is only Gadafy and his Men. I have brought Printers into war now, in this fifth consecutive year. I am well trained in all manner of reconnaissance with scope and with binocular, and am fairly loving certain I can handle that laser designator. What is your prerogative. I am failry loving certain that I can find out what you and your successors are working on, through running some beginning and intermediate chat reconnaissance. Well gently caress you
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:00 |
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Muppet Scabies posted:I am the walrus. What walrus. There is no walrus, there is only Gadafy and his Men. I have brought Printers into war now, in this fifth consecutive year. I am well trained in all manner of reconnaissance with scope and with binocular, and am fairly loving certain I can handle that laser designator. What is your prerogative. I am failry loving certain that I can find out what you and your successors are working on, through running some beginning and intermediate chat reconnaissance. Well gently caress you ---------------- |
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:05 |
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lol.
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:06 |
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Muppet Scabies posted:I am the walrus. What walrus. There is no walrus, there is only Gadafy and his Men. I have brought Printers into war now, in this fifth consecutive year. I am well trained in all manner of reconnaissance with scope and with binocular, and am fairly loving certain I can handle that laser designator. What is your prerogative. I am failry loving certain that I can find out what you and your successors are working on, through running some beginning and intermediate chat reconnaissance. Well gently caress you
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:09 |
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the fakeposts are more plauseable than the real ones what the gently caress is going on
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:15 |
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Muppet Scabies posted:Click. Print. CIA Rendition time.
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:18 |
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wait were is it that we know that the dude in lybia is caro?
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:20 |
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Bong Bored posted:the fakeposts are more plauseable than the real ones what the gently caress is going on fakeposts are achieving the full circle. are you gay? try posting it, ironically. see what happens
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:21 |
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Saw enough poo poo for one day. Linksys took a .50 round and a couple of mechanical keyboards were destroyed in an ambush. The realization that I`m not invincible is slowly kicking in. But with a 9 volt, some detcord, and a couple of magnets attached to the steel mousepad I have in my plate carrier, I believe I will be able to create a sort of electromagnetic deflection field so my enemy`s fire will just curve around me. I`ve ran the raw data past the boys in yospos and so far we still have a green light. Hell, I`ve used wired mice as grappling hooks when tossed into the right nooks. Even if I'm caught I figure the boys in black will give me a job in some blacked out line of work and I will get my pension.
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:30 |
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blazeing w hitler posted:Saw enough poo poo for one day. Linksys took a .50 round and a couple of mechanical keyboards were destroyed in an ambush. The realization that I`m not invincible is slowly kicking in. But with a 9 volt, some detcord, and a couple of magnets attached to the steel mousepad I have in my plate carrier, I believe I will be able to create a sort of electromagnetic deflection field so my enemy`s fire will just curve around me. I`ve ran the raw data past the boys in yospos and so far we still have a green light. Hell, I`ve used wired mice as grappling hooks when tossed into the right nooks. Even if I'm caught I figure the boys in black will give me a job in some blacked out line of work and I will get my pension. lol
I Have Sigs Off |
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:32 |
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das four posted:http://www.salon.com/2011/10/26/npr...ibya/singleton/ yeah notice he loving sucks and didnt hit one person in two minutes and it took a libyan without a sniper rifle to point out where he was and he responded snidely like I KNOW WHERE HE IS OKAY????? THANK YOU.
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:32 |
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blazeing w hitler posted:Saw enough poo poo for one day. Linksys took a .50 round and a couple of mechanical keyboards were destroyed in an ambush. The realization that I`m not invincible is slowly kicking in. But with a 9 volt, some detcord, and a couple of magnets attached to the steel mousepad I have in my plate carrier, I believe I will be able to create a sort of electromagnetic deflection field so my enemy`s fire will just curve around me. I`ve ran the raw data past the boys in yospos and so far we still have a green light. Hell, I`ve used wired mice as grappling hooks when tossed into the right nooks. Even if I'm caught I figure the boys in black will give me a job in some blacked out line of work and I will get my pension. ahahhaha
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:33 |
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but honestly even if he is crazier than hell hes already accomplished a lot more than lf (those loving losers who are now posting on 5 different offsite forums) ever will
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:33 |
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 ..they roll snake eyes!
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:34 |
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Muppet Scabies posted:lmao lmfao
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:36 |
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AncientChinesePenis posted:Lol no really no fakepost can be funnier then the simple fact that a Goon helped overthrow a government
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:38 |
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Car posted:there's videos where he's telling the rebels what to do and some gbs that speaks whatever mud language they speak said they're relaying his orders and treating him like a military consultant lol lmao this is going to be an absolutely hilarious government
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:41 |
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Stinky gently caress Face posted:fakeposts are achieving the full circle. are you gay? try posting it, ironically. see what happens for your sake please dont do that
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 01:47 |
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Neo Mara posted:wait were is it that we know that the dude in lybia is caro? there's one of his utubes where he says "Kevin Dawes, Something Awful Battlefield Correspondant, signing off." ill try and find it later he also posted his irl name (kevin dawes) multiple times and posted a link to his facebook ---------------- |
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 02:01 |
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Car posted:there's one of his utubes where he says "Kevin Dawes, Something Awful Battlefield Correspondant, signing off." ill try and find it later here it is http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=atDV...filepage#t=305s ---------------- |
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 02:04 |
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| # ? May 18, 2013 22:01 |
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Car posted:here it is http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=atDV...filepage#t=305s lol its at 5 min 5 secdonds too haha ---------------- |
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| # ? Oct 28, 2011 02:26 |
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