Food Network & Cooking Show Discussion: Welcome to Flavor Town

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The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > The TV IV > Food Network & Cooking Show Discussion: Welcome to Flavor Town

Joementum: May 23, 2004; I said a million dollars. With a million dollars (unintelligible) clemency. You couldn't do it till after the '74 elections. That's an incriminating thing. His, his word against the President's.

So how much longer is rock star guy going to last on FNS? This week he made sausage and peppers.

With sausage he bought.

edit: Oh I see I'm a week behind and I see how this week ended. Well that question's answered

Joementum fucked around with this message at May 28, 2012 around 23:41

# ? May 28, 2012 23:39

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# ? May 20, 2013 09:34

Timby: Dec 23, 2006; Your Mother!

Did anyone see the Forgione / Morimoto battle on ICA last night?

First off, I had no idea what a Mangalitsa pig was. Then I saw it was a loving gigantic 200-pound hog with fur.

Second, it was kind of a neat idea, if gimmicky, to mandate that every dish had to have a component that was grilled (since, you know, it's Food Network GRILLING WEEK

).

Third, I couldn't stop laughing at Forgione's idiotic attempts to make hot dogs from it, only for the "dogs" to implode the casing in every single attempt.

# ? May 29, 2012 00:32

iastudent: Apr 22, 2008; You walk through life not knowing who the idiots are! That gives them the element of surprise! And that's how they ruin your day!

Recently I picked up Kitchen Confidential and I'm just about finished up with it. As cliche a term it may be, it's one of those things I'm kicking myself for not getting to sooner. I also dug up a gift certificate from the local bookstore I forgot about from last christmas and got A Cook's Tour waiting in the wings.

Where do I go with Bourdain's stuff after these two, and are his novels worth reading as well?

# ? May 31, 2012 22:21

ToastyPotato: Jun 23, 2005; CONVICTED OF DISPLAYING HIS PEANUTS IN PUBLIC

I guess none of us are surprised that Bourdain will not be sticking with Scripps once his contract is up? Given how much he used to bad mouth FN before the merger, I find it funny that within a year or so he is jumping ship to CNN, to basically do the same show he's been doing.

# ? May 31, 2012 22:28

Christopher Irvine: Mar 19, 2009; I came in on the Mothership, and that means that I'm better than you!

Timby posted:

Did anyone see the Forgione / Morimoto battle on ICA last night?

Third, I couldn't stop laughing at Forgione's idiotic attempts to make hot dogs from it, only for the "dogs" to implode the casing in every single attempt.

That was seriously hilarious. And then the judges didn't think it was "hot doggy" enough. I was surprised at how unsophisticated the judges were. I know it isn't rare to have at least one ineloquent person there who is just befuddled by the level of cuisine but two of them gets insufferable.

# ? May 31, 2012 22:28

The_Doctor: Mar 29, 2007; "The entire history of this incarnation is one of temporal orbits, retcons, paradoxes, parallel time lines, reiterations, and divergences. How anyone can make head or tail of all this chaos, I don't know."

iastudent posted:

Recently I picked up Kitchen Confidential and I'm just about finished up with it. As cliche a term it may be, it's one of those things I'm kicking myself for not getting to sooner. I also dug up a gift certificate from the local bookstore I forgot about from last christmas and got A Cook's Tour waiting in the wings.

Where do I go with Bourdain's stuff after these two, and are his novels worth reading as well?

I think he's also got a newer one out, Medium Raw, I want to say?

# ? May 31, 2012 22:53

Timby: Dec 23, 2006; Your Mother!

The_Doctor posted:

I think he's also got a newer one out, Medium Raw, I want to say?

Medium Raw, yep. It's ... it's not great, unfortunately. There are some choice bits, like when he starts teeing off on various celebrity chefs, but Bourdain just doesn't have a whole lot to actually say in it (outside of singing the praises of his young new wife), so it's 300 pages of largely nothing. I'd pick it up from the library, but I wouldn't drop the cash for the hardcover.

ToastyPotato posted:

I guess none of us are surprised that Bourdain will not be sticking with Scripps once his contract is up? Given how much he used to bad mouth FN before the merger, I find it funny that within a year or so he is jumping ship to CNN, to basically do the same show he's been doing.

Bourdain loves what he does, but he has nothing but unbridled hatred for Scripps. As soon as they bought the Travel Channel, the writing was on the wall (I believe he signed his contract extension just before the buyout was announced). I'm sure Scripps has been saying things like, "We don't need the exploration of the world, just be cranky, like Gordon Ramsay," and poo poo like that. That corporation has no soul.

# ? May 31, 2012 23:15

smg77: Apr 27, 2007; I FUCKING LOVE FATTY GOATSTEAKS!

The_Doctor posted:

I think he's also got a newer one out, Medium Raw, I want to say?

Medium Raw is great if you watch a lot of Food Network. There were a few chapters that dealt with how much he loathes the people running the network and describing how they screwed over Emeril.

# ? May 31, 2012 23:18

Frot Lesnar: Feb 27, 2007; Midcarder que no ha hecho mierda

Christopher Irvine posted:

That was seriously hilarious. And then the judges didn't think it was "hot doggy" enough. I was surprised at how unsophisticated the judges were. I know it isn't rare to have at least one ineloquent person there who is just befuddled by the level of cuisine but two of them gets insufferable.

My favorite was after the ICA relaunch and Big Pussy from the Sopranos was mad that Morimoto was making unconventional food. Have you watched the show before dumbass?

# ? Jun 1, 2012 08:26

bunnyofdoom: Mar 29, 2008; Another
confused
census
taker
?

He also has the nasty bits which.is a collection of articles. The final chapter is his after thoughts on em. I found it worth the download price

# ? Jun 1, 2012 21:10

iastudent: Apr 22, 2008; You walk through life not knowing who the idiots are! That gives them the element of surprise! And that's how they ruin your day!

Oh hey, turn on FN for a lark and an ad pops up for Fieti's "Kulinary" Knives.

# ? Jun 1, 2012 22:55

Kung Fu Jesus: Jun 20, 2002; lol jews gonna get fucked.

I think Giada wants a little Ippy in her. And I thoguht it was strange that it was never mentioned that the lesbian-looking chef that was freaked out about Giada was previously a Chopped contestant.

# ? Jun 2, 2012 19:10

ToastyPotato: Jun 23, 2005; CONVICTED OF DISPLAYING HIS PEANUTS IN PUBLIC

Kung Fu Jesus posted:

I think Giada wants a little Ippy in her. And I thoguht it was strange that it was never mentioned that the lesbian-looking chef that was freaked out about Giada was previously a Chopped contestant.

I guess that is why she seemed so familiar?

I also loved that the precommercial tease made it look like she was getting freaked out by Alex Guarnascheli instead of being flustered by Giada.

# ? Jun 2, 2012 20:14

Y Kant Ozma Post: Jun 7, 2001; show, pro-heart, that you have got gall!

I hadn't noticed that, now I'll have to go back and find her on Chopped.

I think I already mentioned it but one of the recent winners of Sweet Genius was also a winner on Chopped previously. You'd think they would have made a bigger deal out of that?

# ? Jun 3, 2012 02:38

Fishylungs: Jan 12, 2008

Y Kant Ozma Post posted:

I hadn't noticed that, now I'll have to go back and find her on Chopped.

I think I already mentioned it but one of the recent winners of Sweet Genius was also a winner on Chopped previously. You'd think they would have made a bigger deal out of that?

Is it the fortune cookie episode? Because I actually just watched that last night and it bummed me out she got kicked off first.

# ? Jun 3, 2012 03:02

mllaneza: Apr 28, 2007; Veteran, Bermuda Triangle Expeditionary Force, 1993-1952

Fishylungs posted:

Is it the fortune cookie episode? Because I actually just watched that last night and it bummed me out she got kicked off first.

No, it was the Serpentine Genius episode. Poor woman had a serious snake phobia going on but managed to get past it. On Chopped, she was the contestant who did a shot with her opponent after the dessert round.

# ? Jun 3, 2012 03:48

criscodisco: Feb 18, 2004; My cat is better than your cat, because my cat is named Super Nintendo Chalmers.

ToastyPotato posted:

I guess that is why she seemed so familiar?

No, she seems familiar because she looks just like Andy Samberg.

# ? Jun 3, 2012 04:03

Kung Fu Jesus: Jun 20, 2002; lol jews gonna get fucked.

Y Kant Ozma Post posted:

I hadn't noticed that, now I'll have to go back and find her on Chopped.

I couldn't forget her on Chopped because she was one of those chefs that was really loud and annoying while she cooked. So much so, I believe the judges reemed her a bit for it.

# ? Jun 3, 2012 22:48

Reinanigans: Aug 31, 2005; "See? Now this is why you didn't get a movie." -Suicune

I think the Hispanic dude on Giada's team with the really short hair also mentioned that he was on Chopped previously. Honestly, I think it's a good idea to cull some talent from that show, especially if the contestants win, or make it pretty far. It shows that they can already cook, at the very least.

# ? Jun 3, 2012 23:11

Bob Loblaw: Jan 4, 2003; Bob Loblaw lobs law bomb

Mystery Diners: fake or really REALLY fake?

At Greasy Earls, nobody acts that poorly that obviously, and you sure as hell don't teach this all to the new person on the first night. Add in the 'hidden' cameras that aren't that hidden based on where they supposedly are, how zoomed in and on top of the action at all time. The premise is completely ruined by how ham handed its handled, what a loving shame.

# ? Jun 4, 2012 00:22

Y Kant Ozma Post: Jun 7, 2001; show, pro-heart, that you have got gall!

Bob Loblaw posted:

Mystery Diners: fake or really REALLY fake?

Really fake thus far.

Speaking of fake, the restaurant impossible I caught last week had to have been largely fake, from the guy who made a "family" bbq sauce using store-bought bbq sauce + some ketchup, basically, to the part where he refuses to come out of the house to talk to Robert and has to be given an "ultimatum."

I'm going to be going to Tex Wasabi's sometime in the near future and I'm kind of scared. I don't really know what I did to deserve it but one of my friends is going to make me go.

# ? Jun 4, 2012 01:51

jscolon2.0: Jul 9, 2001; With great payroll, comes great disappointment.

Y Kant Ozma Post posted:

Really fake thus far.

Speaking of fake, the restaurant impossible I caught last week had to have been largely fake, from the guy who made a "family" bbq sauce using store-bought bbq sauce + some ketchup, basically, to the part where he refuses to come out of the house to talk to Robert and has to be given an "ultimatum."

I'm going to be going to Tex Wasabi's sometime in the near future and I'm kind of scared. I don't really know what I did to deserve it but one of my friends is going to make me go.

Gringo Sushi trip report.

# ? Jun 4, 2012 03:56

Y Kant Ozma Post: Jun 7, 2001; show, pro-heart, that you have got gall!

jscolon2.0 posted:

Gringo Sushi trip report.

I was able to try & enjoy the raw chicken I had at the yakitori place that night, but the thought of actually eating one of those big bird rolls made me queasy. Can't wait. One of the people at the table said "oh, come on, I've been there twice and I only got sick once."

Maybe I'll die before it ever happens but if it does happen, you will be the first to hear about it.

# ? Jun 4, 2012 06:02

Christopher Irvine: Mar 19, 2009; I came in on the Mothership, and that means that I'm better than you!

Can I please have a .gif of Giada eating the fishstick on tonights FNS? Because I laughed and laughed.

# ? Jun 4, 2012 08:39

Kung Fu Jesus: Jun 20, 2002; lol jews gonna get fucked.

I just noticed that the teams on FNS are kind of strangely aligned with their mentor. Giada picked all the pretty people. Bobby picked all the chefy people. And Alton picked all the oddballs. I wonder if they planned that.

# ? Jun 5, 2012 17:09

Spigs: Jun 5, 2008

Kung Fu Jesus posted:

I just noticed that the teams on FNS are kind of strangely aligned with their mentor. Giada picked all the pretty people. Bobby picked all the chefy people. And Alton picked all the oddballs. I wonder if they planned that.

They clearly and explicitly called this out in the first episode, several people commented on it including Alton Brown himself. So yeah, gonna say it was planned.

# ? Jun 5, 2012 17:21

Kung Fu Jesus: Jun 20, 2002; lol jews gonna get fucked.

Oh really? I missed the first episode.

# ? Jun 5, 2012 23:23

Y Kant Ozma Post: Jun 7, 2001; show, pro-heart, that you have got gall!

I don't blame you for missing it, as it was terrible and tedious, but yeah.

# ? Jun 5, 2012 23:32

Tupping Liberty: Mar 17, 2008; Never cross an introvert.

Y Kant Ozma Post posted:

I don't blame you for missing it, as it was terrible and tedious, but yeah.

Yeah, it's amazing - they've pared it down to 1 hour now, and it still feels long long long.

# ? Jun 6, 2012 02:02

Christopher Irvine: Mar 19, 2009; I came in on the Mothership, and that means that I'm better than you!

Tupping Liberty posted:

Yeah, it's amazing - they've pared it down to 1 hour now, and it still feels long long long.

Next week's back to 90 minutes

# ? Jun 6, 2012 02:16

Y Kant Ozma Post: Jun 7, 2001; show, pro-heart, that you have got gall!

Christopher Irvine posted:

Next week's back to 90 minutes

why.

WHY

Oh, and:

http://www.quora.com/Food-Network/H...-Iron-Chef-work

quote:

Jonas M Luster, culinary mercenary
132 votes by David S. Rose, Andrew Smith, Javier Lopez, (more)
There is a hefty fine for disclosing the inner workings of Iron Chef publicly, so this is the recount of a friend of a friend whom I don't know and never met. Any similarities with a real show are purely coincidental.

A few weeks before the taping the production company calls and asks if the chef would like to compete. On agreement another call is scheduled a week down the road during which such things as sous chefs, taping dates, and more are discussed. Also the compensation and what to shill when the chef comes on stage.

During the second call an Iron Chef is chosen. The other Iron Chefs at the taping are just doubles standing in for the real ones, the stuff you see on TV is B-Roll (secondary footage that adds meaning to a sequence or disguises the elimination of unwanted content). Aside from the chosen Iron Chef none are in the building.

Once the Iron Chef is chosen a few days pass, then a call is again made during which the challenger is informed which secret ingredient the Iron Chef chose. Yes, the secret ingredient is chosen by the Iron Chef. The challenger is given one of three possible ingredients.

A few weeks of practicing five dishes follows. Which is much easier than it's made to look. No one who can't make five dishes in one hour should be allowed to call themselves a cook.

The day of the taping starts early. First a lot of B-Roll is shot, then the challenger intro is filmed and the "selection" of the Iron Chef. After this the secret ingredient is revealed ("act surprised, OK?") and the challenger and Iron Chef have a little time to plan ahead. Not that the Iron Chef needs to, they already knew what it would be.

The filming of the 60 minute cooking takes about three hours. The judges are introduced and some B-Roll is shot. My FoF had a personal friend of the Iron Chef, some B-list celebrity, and a food writer as judges. After 35 minutes or so, when the dishes are done, more B-roll is shot and some shots are redone where, for example, a camera was in the way or someone cursed too much. A lot of Alton Brown is shot after the cooking, he does some Wikipedia lookups and writes his script, then Brown and Brauch shots are finished and the Iron Chef and Challenger retreat.

One of the challenger's sous chefs as well as one of the Iron Chef's sous chefs stays behind and works with the FN cooks to make six plates of each of the courses. Four go to the judges table (the judges are not in the room for this, they're around for the chef cooking taping and for the judging), one goes in the back for B-roll and one is set aside for promo and other work.

The judges return and IC and challenger do the song and dance. Sometimes something happens (my FoF's chef dropped a plate, for example) and either the aside plate is brought out or a new one is quickly cooked. B-roll of judges eating is shot, some witty banter, then everyone goes back into their waiting areas.

Another hour later the "chairman" and the chefs are brought back out, the big reveal is done. And then it's all over.

# ? Jun 6, 2012 02:23

axleblaze: Oct 18, 2006; Man, this is a boooring found footage movie.

Y Kant Ozma Post posted:

http://www.quora.com/Food-Network/H...-Iron-Chef-work

Like 90% of that was revealed in the Unwrapped episode they did on Food Network Shows. The only new stuff in there is that AB films some of his stuff later and that the Iron Chef picks the ingredient (which I'm not even sure I believe because it would be kind of pointless over giving them a list of three). It's cool that the writer is acting like he's revealing some huge secret that THE MAN at FN don't want you to know, though.

# ? Jun 6, 2012 05:15

Obeast: Aug 26, 2006; �_~ ANIME BABE LOVER 2000 ~_�

Sweet Genius is on right now (I have no idea if it's a new episode or not), and two of the three contestants left just served Chef Ron incomplete dishes. Needless to say, it was hilarious and awkard as gently caress, especially when Ron made a contestant try to get a piece of hard candy he made off the plate since it was stuck.

# ? Jun 8, 2012 02:44

Toffile: Sep 10, 2008;    'Cause she's so high
      High above me,
       she's so lovely
                - Everclear

2 words

Vegemite s'mores

# ? Jun 8, 2012 02:49

FISHMANPET: Mar 3, 2007

What the gently caress, Chef Hunter presumably crashed and burned, because my DVR only ever caught 3 episodes or so of it, but we've got a brand new show Chef Wanted, starring Anne Burrel!

# ? Jun 8, 2012 03:25

Tupping Liberty: Mar 17, 2008; Never cross an introvert.

Re: how shows are shot, I wouldn't mind knowing how long Cupcake Wars or the Cake challenge one actually take.

# ? Jun 11, 2012 23:26

Christopher Irvine: Mar 19, 2009; I came in on the Mothership, and that means that I'm better than you!

FNS expanding to 90 minutes was just terrible, as expected. Judson going home was a bit of a gutpunch. (Team Michelle straight to hell yaw) I did like how Talky McRambleson clearly had a bad case of survivors' guilt.

# ? Jun 12, 2012 00:12

dude789: Nov 4, 2009; I'll make your ass sense.

Obeast posted:

Sweet Genius is on right now (I have no idea if it's a new episode or not), and two of the three contestants left just served Chef Ron incomplete dishes. Needless to say, it was hilarious and awkard as gently caress, especially when Ron made a contestant try to get a piece of hard candy he made off the plate since it was stuck.

The worst part about that was his dish wasn't even the worst. He didn't even try the s'mores lady's dish because she just assembled the s'mores and didn't prepare any of it herself.

# ? Jun 12, 2012 00:18

axleblaze: Oct 18, 2006; Man, this is a boooring found footage movie.

Who is the audience for Mystery Diners? Why do they think it's a good idea in this economy to have a show about people with lovely jobs getting yelled at for not acting like their minimum wage job is their life and getting fired? It's not like this is Kitchen Nightmares where the staff is acting outrageously bad. The stuff that was going on in the episode I saw was bad service but not to the point where I started sympathizing with the owner.

The whole thing is also hilariously faked. The cameras are places in locations where it'd be impossible for the people not to see them, not to mention the sound quality indicates that the waiters must be miked. Even the "how restaurant is doing now" seemed really fake. The person they fired had not been there long yet firing her turned the restaurant around...right

# ? Jun 12, 2012 00:18

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# ? May 20, 2013 09:34

angerbot: Mar 23, 2004

Tupping Liberty posted:

Re: how shows are shot, I wouldn't mind knowing how long Cupcake Wars or the Cake challenge one actually take.

An eternity for anyone in the studio, I'd reckon.

# ? Jun 12, 2012 01:37

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