Funny Pictures XII: When I die I want to be made into a helicopter like that.

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The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Post Your Favorite (or Request) > Funny Pictures XII: When I die I want to be made into a helicopter like that.

Vincent Van Goatse: Nov 8, 2006; Veni, vidi, Lombardi.

Spiderman's also probably a better superhero when he isn't being used as a self-insert by neurotic comic book writers who still haven't gotten over high school.

EDIT:

Vincent Van Goatse fucked around with this message at May 29, 2012 around 00:43

# ? May 29, 2012 00:40

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# ? May 19, 2013 20:42

darthbob88: Oct 13, 2011

Senior Woodchuck posted:

In case anyone's wondering, yes, it's as stupid as it sounds.

Probably more, never seen it myself but: Aunt May gets shot and sent to hospital, where she may die. Peter, in the interests of saving her, makes a deal with the devil. None of his medically inclined friends can help her, nor any of the magically inclined people, so he goes for the devil and trades his future with Mary Jane, his love for her, his future family, all that, to keep his incredibly old and frail aunt from dying too soon.

Break out of the 4th wall, look at the corporate nonsense around the story, and it becomes more stupid. Apparently editor-in-chief Joe Quesada felt that comic book readers just couldn't handle the idea of a happily married Spider-Man, and took measures to prevent/undo that.

Times like this I marvel at the quality of comic book writing.

Edit for content:
Thug Lyfe, yo.

darthbob88 fucked around with this message at May 29, 2012 around 00:51

# ? May 29, 2012 00:45

Consummate Professional: Sep 1, 2006; _{did you know that even with seat belts

pople die all the time in car crashes? i

thought that was interesting}

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

Spiderman's also probably a better superhero when he isn't being used as a self-insert by neurotic comic book writers who still haven't gotten over high school.

EDIT:

Back story on this one: Driver cop was getting a blowjob from the passenger cop, lost his attention. and drove into/under a plane.

# ? May 29, 2012 00:49

budgieinspector: Mar 24, 2006; According to my research, these would appear to be Budgerigars.

Disco Pope posted:

Ghost Rider met angels/is actually an angel/it's probably been retconned anyway.

Internet Wizard posted:

Marvel characters go to Hell all of the time. Spider-man even made a deal with ~~the devil~~ Mephisto where he sold his relationship with Mary Jane to get Aunt May back from the dead or something.

Still not seeing the Christian afterlife in evidence; lots of religions have angels and lots more have hells. Got anything with a New-Testament-style Yahweh or, y'know, a canonical story featuring Jesus in any capacity?

My whole point with the original post was that, despite the known-to-the-world-at-large existence of Asgard in the Marvel U, and the not-necessarily-publicly-known, but-you-could-definitely-get-first-hand-accounts existence of lots of other supernatural sites and planes of existence, I couldn't recall any of the characters who've either died or ventured to different planes of existence ever encountering Christ. Not even the Christians. It would seem like someone would stand up at some point and say, "I've worked with Thor and Hercules. I've met and/or fought gods and godlike beings ranging from The Beyonder to Thanos to Mephisto - and those loving Skrull Gods? They're dicks. I've traveled the astral plane with Doc Strange, and been to alternate dimensions. I just got resurrected after spending five years dead. My superhero friends found my soul in Hades, for poo poo's sake. Hades! I was a Catholic all my life, and I got sent to an ancient Greek afterworld? Point being, I've seen a lot of what's frankly beyond most people's ken, and didn't see hide nor hair of Jesus, even when I died. So screw this noise, you might as well worship Herc -- at least he'll talk back when you speak to him."

# ? May 29, 2012 00:54

I: Aug 4, 2006; by Y Kant Ozma Post

Not a macro.

# ? May 29, 2012 00:59

Eggplant Wizard: Jul 8, 2005; I was getting sick of seeing that.

budgieinspector posted:

Still not seeing the Christian afterlife in evidence; lots of religions have angels and lots more have hells. Got anything with a New-Testament-style Yahweh or, y'know, a canonical story featuring Jesus in any capacity?

My whole point with the original post was that, despite the known-to-the-world-at-large existence of Asgard in the Marvel U, and the not-necessarily-publicly-known, but-you-could-definitely-get-first-hand-accounts existence of lots of other supernatural sites and planes of existence, I couldn't recall any of the characters who've either died or ventured to different planes of existence ever encountering Christ. Not even the Christians. It would seem like someone would stand up at some point and say, "I've worked with Thor and Hercules. I've met and/or fought gods and godlike beings ranging from The Beyonder to Thanos to Mephisto - and those loving Skrull Gods? They're dicks. I've traveled the astral plane with Doc Strange, and been to alternate dimensions. I just got resurrected after spending five years dead. My superhero friends found my soul in Hades, for poo poo's sake. Hades! I was a Catholic all my life, and I got sent to an ancient Greek afterworld? Point being, I've seen a lot of what's frankly beyond most people's ken, and didn't see hide nor hair of Jesus, even when I died. So screw this noise, you might as well worship Herc -- at least he'll talk back when you speak to him."

I heard there was a derail in here and I guess this is probably it so SHUT THE gently caress UP

# ? May 29, 2012 01:02

Decrepus: May 21, 2008; All that you have found is your inevitable punishment.

Consummate Professional posted:

Back story on this one: Driver cop was getting a blowjob from the passenger cop, lost his attention. and drove into/under a plane.

Pilot charged with two counts of assault on a police officer.

# ? May 29, 2012 01:18

Throatwarbler: Nov 17, 2008; Both my hands are capable of moving a stick up and down 5 inches. No extra practice or training was needed.

darthbob88 posted:

Edit for content:
Thug Lyfe, yo.

That big one in the middle is some kind of old bolt action cartridge for a World War 1 rifle - it has a prominent "rim" at the base to help it feed into a bolt action, which modern cartridges like the others in the picture designed for magazine loading actions do not have. A little incongruous.

# ? May 29, 2012 02:01

Heres Hank: Oct 20, 2008

Throatwarbler posted:

That big one in the middle is some kind of old bolt action cartridge for a World War 1 rifle - it has a prominent "rim" at the base to help it feed into a bolt action, which modern cartridges like the others in the picture designed for magazine loading actions do not have. A little incongruous.

Because that 1911 is some bleeding edge poo poo, right?

# ? May 29, 2012 02:13

Morpheus: Apr 18, 2008; HAMDOGS: Like staring into the Flame of God

Throatwarbler posted:

That big one in the middle is some kind of old bolt action cartridge for a World War 1 rifle - it has a prominent "rim" at the base to help it feed into a bolt action, which modern cartridges like the others in the picture designed for magazine loading actions do not have. A little incongruous.

Pretty sure that's a chicken nugget, bro.

# ? May 29, 2012 02:19

Flavor Bear: Jan 13, 2008; Bear Love is Best Love

Throatwarbler posted:

That big one in the middle is some kind of old bolt action cartridge for a World War 1 rifle - it has a prominent "rim" at the base to help it feed into a bolt action, which modern cartridges like the others in the picture designed for magazine loading actions do not have. A little incongruous.

Best watch yourself. Guy's got 53 bucks, probably more, so it's not like he won't hop on a Megabus and find your rear end.

# ? May 29, 2012 02:31

Gaunab: Feb 13, 2012

Where are you guys getting thug? The $53, WWI era guns, and Kid Cuisine just scream goony. I can just see a follow up picture with pizza rolls by their katana collection.

# ? May 29, 2012 03:17

Humboldt squid: Jan 21, 2006

Gaunab posted:

Where are you guys getting thug? The $53, WWI era guns, and Kid Cuisine just scream goony. I can just see a follow up picture with pizza rolls by their katana collection.

You are a champion joke getter. You should enter joke getting contests and clean house.

# ? May 29, 2012 03:38

Gaunab: Feb 13, 2012

Well there is a competition coming up in my town. You really think I got what it takes to be the best at joke getting?

# ? May 29, 2012 03:59

Frostwerks: Sep 24, 2007

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

Spiderman's also probably a better superhero when he isn't being used as a self-insert by neurotic comic book writers who still haven't gotten over high school.

EDIT:

That plane is trying to gently caress the police.

# ? May 29, 2012 04:10

AlphaDog: Sep 27, 2004; Destroyer of Hardware

Gaunab posted:

Well there is a competition coming up in my town. You really think I got what it takes to be the best at joke getting?

Speaking of not getting the joke, I thought that was Ancient Roman sandals / shin armour, and thought "so what's the problem?"

Then I looked closer. Holy gently caress.

# ? May 29, 2012 04:47

Zzulu: May 15, 2009

darthbob88 posted:

Probably more, never seen it myself but: Aunt May gets shot and sent to hospital, where she may die. Peter, in the interests of saving her, makes a deal with the devil. None of his medically inclined friends can help her, nor any of the magically inclined people, so he goes for the devil and trades his future with Mary Jane, his love for her, his future family, all that, to keep his incredibly old and frail aunt from dying too soon.

Break out of the 4th wall, look at the corporate nonsense around the story, and it becomes more stupid. Apparently editor-in-chief Joe Quesada felt that comic book readers just couldn't handle the idea of a happily married Spider-Man, and took measures to prevent/undo that.

Times like this I marvel at the quality of comic book writing.

Edit for content:
Thug Lyfe, yo.

That looks really gross. Is that what you feed your kids, America?

# ? May 29, 2012 07:29

Tatum Girlparts: Sep 8, 2011; Do you think you can destroy me with your Nexus? I who served Thuganomics, I who commanded The Cenation, hundreds of years before you were on NXT?

Zzulu posted:

That looks really gross. Is that what you feed your kids, America?

No that's a really disgusting stereotype. We don't give our kids the second pistol or rifle ammo until at least puberty.

# ? May 29, 2012 07:33

Paper Tiger: Jun 17, 2007; but my teeth are atomic

Zzulu posted:

That looks really gross. Is that what you feed your kids, America?

You know what they say, he who eats ammo goes number two with a bullet.

# ? May 29, 2012 07:47

pageerror404: Feb 14, 2012; A steaming mug of it!

I posted:

Not a macro.

That's brilliant. How did the guy respond?

I would be like, "The first letter is the letter A, which is designated in this case by answer C... so my final answer is C, which means the letter A"

# ? May 29, 2012 08:46

Cleretic: Feb 3, 2010; Fighting Rikti forever, That's just what Giant Robo CoX do.

pageerror404 posted:

That's brilliant. How did the guy respond?

I would be like, "The first letter is the letter A, which is designated in this case by answer C... so my final answer is C, which means the letter A"

Sorry, it's actually a sketch from an Australian comedy show. It's pretty clear they just stretched a 99-second sketch out fo that single amazing picture, though.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=evKYF1G_uDI

# ? May 29, 2012 08:56

TShields: Mar 29, 2007; We can rule them like gods! ...Angry gods.

Zzulu posted:

That looks really gross. Is that what you feed your kids, America?

Only the latchkey kids!

# ? May 29, 2012 12:11

A GLISTENING HODOR: Aug 8, 2009; lemoncakes?
lemoncakes?fucking lemoncakes?
stop POSTING about FUCKING LEMONCAKES

The redneck kids get Kel-Tec or Taurus.

:it-is-a-TFR-joke:

# ? May 29, 2012 13:05

Ho Chi Mint: Sep 6, 2005; MY NAME IS ARMYMAN25 AND I AM A POSTER OF SHIT. 3 BANS IN THE PAST YEAR AND I JUST DON'T FUCKING GET WHY PEOPLE DON'T FIND ME HILARIOUS AND INSIGHTFUL LIKE MY MOM DOES.

PLEASE IGNORE EVERYTHING TO THE RIGHT OF THIS TEXT

Happy Memorial Day!

# ? May 29, 2012 14:09

Shimrra Jamaane: Aug 9, 2007; Remind me to work out until I also am buff and have to keep a pillow in front of my okay I'll be honest this is like the 50th custom title I've done tonight and I'm just phoning it in now.

Armyman25 posted:

Happy Memorial Day!

We've hit peak

# ? May 29, 2012 14:27

Bored As Fuck: Jan 1, 2006; Be polite. Be professional. But be prepared to PARTAYYY!

AlphaDog posted:

Speaking of not getting the joke, I thought that was Ancient Roman sandals / shin armour, and thought "so what's the problem?"

Then I looked closer. Holy gently caress.

I'm really glad I'm not the only one, hahahaha

# ? May 29, 2012 14:44

LordArgh: Mar 17, 2009; It is a cliche that most cliches are true, but then like most cliches, that cliche is untrue.

# ? May 29, 2012 14:55

vxskud: Nov 19, 2006

Armyman25 posted:

Happy Memorial Day!

Nothing says American spirit like a product made by a company owned by Europeans and Brazillians.

# ? May 29, 2012 16:03

BooLoo: Oct 18, 2010

I think the Czechs are happy for them to keep it though.

# ? May 29, 2012 16:10

stubblyhead: Sep 13, 2007; That is treason, Johnny!

Armyman25 posted:

Happy Memorial Day!

Where can you buy kegs at the supermarket?

# ? May 29, 2012 16:44

GreenNight: Feb 19, 2006; Turning the light on the darkest places, you and I know we got to face this now. We got to face this now.

vxskud posted:

Nothing says American spirit like a product made by a company owned by Europeans and Brazillians.

American patriots died in Europe too.

# ? May 29, 2012 16:52

Soysaucebeast: Mar 4, 2008; Water Tribe, Bitches

stubblyhead posted:

Where can you buy kegs at the supermarket?

Walmart, if you call and let them know you want them ahead of time.

# ? May 29, 2012 17:17

Decrepus: May 21, 2008; All that you have found is your inevitable punishment.

Soysaucebeast posted:

Walmart, if you call and let them know you want them ahead of time.

I am so jealous of people who can buy alcohol at a supermarket.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? May 29, 2012 18:13

SpacePig: Apr 4, 2007; He's always
right there.

Decrepus posted:

I am so jealous of people who can buy alcohol at a supermarket.

PA Liquor Control Board, why must you forsake us so?

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? May 29, 2012 18:28

Away all Goats: Jul 5, 2005; Back from the dead

Decrepus posted:

I am so jealous of people who can buy alcohol at a supermarket.

I know that feel bro

# ? May 29, 2012 18:29

Georgia Peach: Jan 7, 2005; SECESSION IS FUTILE

Decrepus posted:

I am so jealous of people who can buy alcohol at a supermarket.

I can even buy hard liquor at the supermarket. It's pretty sweet.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? May 29, 2012 18:33

Crowley: Mar 13, 2003

Georgia Peach posted:

I can even buy hard liquor at the supermarket. It's pretty sweet.

Yep. It's right next to the smokes near the register.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? May 29, 2012 18:39

suddenly cats: Nov 16, 2006; Cats do not abide by the laws of nature, alright? You don't know shit about cats.

CO liquor laws are dicks.

There are so many restrictions on liquor here it's not even funny.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? May 29, 2012 19:03

The Taxman: Jan 2, 2007; greetings sweeties, let me give you a back massage. for i am a whiz!

Crowley posted:

Yep. It's right next to the smokes near the register.

Here in Michigan, the hard liquor has its own aisle.

In fact, they don't sell tobacco products anymore, but they still sell liquor.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? May 29, 2012 19:13

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# ? May 19, 2013 20:42

Roblo: Dec 10, 2007

Georgia Peach posted:

I can even buy hard liquor at the supermarket. It's pretty sweet.

I can't wrap my head around the fact that some people can't do this (apart from people in the UAE etc, of course), I have been about to do it legally since i was 18 (and illegally for a good 3 years before that).

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? May 29, 2012 19:14

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The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Post Your Favorite (or Request) > Funny Pictures XII: When I die I want to be made into a helicopter like that.