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Customer Review: By Ema I greatly enjoyed the new Komfort Kollar review. I didn't read the byline, but by the end I knew who wrote it. I'd like to see more in this series.
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| # ? Feb 2, 2012 01:49 |
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| # ? May 25, 2013 11:27 |
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I'd like to add that stoot's hillbilly review really sold me on this article. Enjoyed the hell out of it and the final entry is an almost perfect hint at some kind of unthinkable madness.
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| # ? Feb 2, 2012 22:27 |
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Peeing Boy made me laugh with delight. The underpants story is my favorite!
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| # ? Feb 22, 2012 08:40 |
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newyorksalsaman I read it as "salesman" at first, then did a double take. Livestock is good at names. I love these updates. http://www.somethingawful.com/d/new...-peeing-boy.php
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| # ? Feb 22, 2012 22:17 |
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Captain Pike posted:Peeing Boy made me laugh with delight. The underpants story is my favorite! "I want a divorce." Another signature Livestock article.
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| # ? Feb 23, 2012 04:59 |
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The ZenHaus Dog Crates review was the best yet, proving again that everything is funnier with dogs.
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| # ? Mar 15, 2012 22:39 |
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http://www.somethingawful.com/d/new...-hair-laser.phpquote:By hongkong-laser-imports from Fort Wayne, IN he was trying to stimulate additional hair growth in places where nobody should ever want additional hair growth.... Subtle touch, made all the difference.. Great stuff. drukqs fucked around with this message at Mar 31, 2012 around 02:58 |
| # ? Mar 30, 2012 20:51 |
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I wonder what happens if you point the X5 and the i-Light Pro at the same spot? One is using light to grow hair, while the other uses light to remove hair. Together the form some light/hair paradox the world has never seen.
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| # ? Mar 31, 2012 12:21 |
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Personal Infrared Sauna This was great, and Plumpster's review was a horrific ordeal to read. quote:The sudden and dramatic expenditure of energy took its toll on me, and I did vomit on myself. Thankfully the folds of fat around my neck created an airtight seal around the head opening of the sauna, and the vomit did not trickle down inside. Knowing I could be in for a long ordeal, I was able to slurp most of it back up, giving myself extra energy to keep trying. Eventually I was able to tip the whole unit over, with myself inside. But I was still stuck. This was horrible and beautiful, nicely done!
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| # ? Apr 11, 2012 15:26 |
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Great article as usual. Would have been better if it had a hole tho.
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| # ? Apr 11, 2012 15:41 |
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Chris! posted:Personal Infrared Sauna We need more stories about slurping puke and filling saunas to the brim with poo poo!
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| # ? Apr 11, 2012 19:10 |
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Chris! posted:Personal Infrared Sauna Hilarious study in cognitive dissonance with the last couple of lines too 
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| # ? Apr 11, 2012 20:58 |
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These reviews are brilliant. Even before these, if I ever came across a skymall catalog, I'd always point and laugh at the various bizarre products that it had in it. I could see someone getting a lot of mileage out of this for the next review:  It's actually a litterbox,if you can believe it: http://www.skymall.com/shopping/det...3365386&c=10720 It looks more like a cat escape pod than a litterbox.
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| # ? Apr 11, 2012 23:51 |
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Dr. Fingerguns posted:These reviews are brilliant. Even before these, if I ever came across a skymall catalog, I'd always point and laugh at the various bizarre products that it had in it. Thanks guys! That looks like some kind of industrial cat microwave/submarine. I'll have to use it sometime.
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| # ? Apr 12, 2012 02:21 |
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I almost got one of those. I opted for this instead.
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| # ? Apr 14, 2012 23:43 |
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Komfort Kollar is almost Papperbok good. Brilliant, absolutely brilliant.
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| # ? Apr 24, 2012 19:17 |
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http://www.somethingawful.com/d/new...ll-king-tut.php I always have to click on the pictures in these, because I find it absolutely impossible to believe these are actual things a store is seling. I mean, a King Tut cabinet. Seriously. That blows my mind, even for Skymall.
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| # ? Apr 25, 2012 13:04 |
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King Tut was great today!
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| # ? Apr 25, 2012 15:46 |
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John Dyne posted:http://www.somethingawful.com/d/new...ll-king-tut.php You know, I have read all of the skymall reviews, and they are one of my favorite series. The horrible use and misuse that Livestock keeps dreaming up for the products is always funny. But today, something didn't really sink in with me until I read this post. These are real things a company decided to market and sell. I mean I knew it all along, but I think it's something that I just pushed to the back of my mind because I have read so many of these review articles. Almost all of the products seem like some fake bullshit gimick item Livestock dreamed up out of no where. But no, they are some real bullshit gimick items sold in a catalog on the airplane. This post made me stop and really consider that for a few. Skymall: funny products, funny reviews.
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| # ? Apr 26, 2012 22:48 |
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In case some people reading this thread didn't know, a couple of guys did Skymall product reviews in more of a Fashion SWAT mockery style. This was back in 2007, and it's a different style of humor than Livestock's customer reviews, but still great reading if you want to see more Skymall zaniness. http://www.somethingawful.com/d/gui...guide-part1.php http://www.somethingawful.com/d/gui...guide-part2.php http://www.somethingawful.com/d/gui...guide-part3.php http://www.somethingawful.com/d/gui...guide-part4.php http://www.somethingawful.com/d/gui...guide-part5.php http://www.somethingawful.com/d/gui...guide-part6.php http://www.somethingawful.com/d/gui...guide-part7.php
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| # ? Apr 26, 2012 23:00 |
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Nucular Carmul posted:In case some people reading this thread didn't know, a couple of guys did Skymall product reviews in more of a Fashion SWAT mockery style. This was back in 2007, and it's a different style of humor than Livestock's customer reviews, but still great reading if you want to see more Skymall zaniness. I actually forgot about those when I started my product reviews series (it was kind of a last minute "OH GOD OH GOD WHAT DO I WRITE ABOUT" thing), but I'll have to go back and re-read them so as not to accidentally repeat or steal any jokes. I think there's plenty of room for SkyMall mockery, given the fact I still get surprised by the stupidity of something each time I visit their site or open one of their catalogs.
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| # ? Apr 26, 2012 23:56 |
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Livestock posted:I actually forgot about those when I started my product reviews series (it was kind of a last minute "OH GOD OH GOD WHAT DO I WRITE ABOUT" thing), but I'll have to go back and re-read them so as not to accidentally repeat or steal any jokes. I think there's plenty of room for SkyMall mockery, given the fact I still get surprised by the stupidity of something each time I visit their site or open one of their catalogs. I love both yours and Dimebag's articles, pretty sure you haven't repeated anything aside from the general concept that "Skymall product creators are somehow doing their job while on crack and getting away with it."
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| # ? Apr 27, 2012 00:29 |
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No hole, don't bother.
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| # ? Apr 28, 2012 06:13 |
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Okay I finally got my "had to go to the link to confirm it was real" moment on the Neck PRO. Thing looks like a god drat Saw device 
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| # ? May 2, 2012 09:08 |
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Is neck traction really something people should be doing without professional supervision? It seems unwise.
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| # ? May 2, 2012 10:13 |
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Angela Christine posted:Is neck traction really something people should be doing without professional supervision? It seems unwise. Neck traction is a proven method of totally enhancing your orgasms, with thousands of years of anecdotal evidence and celebrity testimony to back it up.
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| # ? May 2, 2012 23:16 |
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http://www.skymall.com/shopping/det...2471079&c=10615 The Body Back Buddy looks like a worthy item for reviews...
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| # ? May 4, 2012 17:43 |
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Those are real products?
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| # ? May 4, 2012 18:30 |
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http://www.somethingawful.com/d/new...itter-robot.php I looked up this product, and in addition to being hilariously awful, the company apparently sells reconditioned units through their website.
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| # ? May 30, 2012 21:26 |
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That thing looks like it wants to wheel around and yell "exterminate" while your cat shits inside of it
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| # ? May 31, 2012 00:32 |
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Another great update. MLB Forest Face I'm trying to imagine the backstory behind this product. Banker: Hello, sir, how can our bank help your new business? Inventor: Well you see, I want to manufacture little plastic face parts and then get an official MLB license. Then I'll sell the kits to campers so they can build baseball player faces on trees while camping. I need about $50,000 for the license and the first round of production in China. Banker: Absolutely! Here let me cut you a check.
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| # ? Jun 27, 2012 15:26 |
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I go to Skymall's front page and a horde of forest faces are staring at me. I still can't believe they're a real thing.
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| # ? Jun 27, 2012 19:29 |
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How... how do they know? 
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| # ? Jun 27, 2012 22:32 |
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http://www.somethingawful.com/d/new...porch-potty.php Congratulations on making Skymall's "patch of grass for indoor dogs to poo poo on" product even more disgusting.  These articles are awesome.
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| # ? Jul 11, 2012 23:37 |
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My prrsonal favorite after king tut. FYI the miniature fire hydrant pictured here is not a real one and does not work like a real one. Basically, don't expect this thing to help put out any house fires. I was dying imaging some guy trying to put out a grease fire in his kitchen and burning his house down leading to an angry review. Well done.
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| # ? Jul 15, 2012 22:16 |
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elmer fud posted:My prrsonal favorite after king tut. What a moron that guy would be. You don't use water to put out grease fires. 
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| # ? Jul 16, 2012 11:28 |
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Skymall reviews continues to be one of the funniest loving things ever. Especially love the "reviews" from SkyMallCop:SkyMallCop posted:It's called Neck PRO, not Neck Amateur. If you can't handle a professional neck traction device, then don't bother buying this one. Go to a doctor and have him massage your weak neck. For those of us who can handle a professional grade Neck Traction Device, the NeckPro is perfect. Once they make an extra large size capable of harnessing my head and neck, I will be using it every day.
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| # ? Jul 16, 2012 17:37 |
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As someone who has gotten an awkward 12 year-old boner on an airplane thanks to Skymall's sexy legs furniture line I really appreciated this article. http://www.somethingawful.com/d/new...bette-table.php
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| # ? Jul 18, 2012 21:58 |
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Just wanted to say that this is a great series and I love them all. I didn't realize until about 2-3 in that these are actual SkyMall products, and that just makes it all the better.
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| # ? Jul 22, 2012 19:23 |
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| # ? May 25, 2013 11:27 |
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The Eye Massager review is absolutely hilarious. Deciduouspubes is a fantastic username.
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| # ? Aug 8, 2012 10:12 |
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