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ROSS MY SALAD
Feb 22, 2007

X-Thames got the defense on lock.


The superbowl has come and gone, and we're once again plunged into the offseason. The biggest question of this version of the NFL offseason hinges around one of its biggest stars of the last decade, and arguably the face of the NFL, Indianapolis Colts Quarterback and all around good guy Peyton Manning.


This guy.

Peyton Manning is going to be the biggest name free agent to hit the NFL in ages. He's up there in age, but a player of his caliber hasn't been on the open market since like, Emmitt Smith. And he's a running back so it's different.

Of course most of you know the story, Peyton missed the entire 2011 season with a neck injury. The Colts have the option of keeping Peyton on the roster, but would have to pay him the full amount of his 28 million dollar guaranteed deal for 2012 at the start of the new league year, in early March. While it is feasible that they can do this, most "experts" and most of us here at TFF assume that Peyton will be released.

Peyton has been cleared to practice and play by his own doctors, but even so, there's still a not-miniscule chance that he might never play a snap again. And even if he does play, he might not be the same kind of quarterback we've come to know over the last 14 years.

So where will Peyton go?

THE CONTENDERS

Miami Dolphins


The Dolphins figure to make a play for Manning. I have no idea what the cap situations are for all of these teams, but the Dolphins have been searching for a quarterback to replace Dan Marino since Dan Marino retired. What better way than with a 36 year old Peyton Manning?


Arizona Cardinals


Kevin Kolb sucks. Larry Fitzgerald catching passes from Peyton Manning are the things that dreams are made of. Also I think the Cardinals just signed Peyton's old QB coach? That's kind of cool.


San Francisco 49ers


Peyton Manning with that defense and Jim Harbaugh holy loving poo poo


Here are some other Pey-Tars:







Talk about Peyton Manning!

edit: Of course all of these fantastic logo modifications are credited to Febreeze, who is fantastic and amazing.

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Febreeze
Oct 24, 2011

I turn my gaze out upon the field and forever burned into my eyes is a sorry pageant of spectacular failure


Yay! A new home for my stupid pictures!

I may have to stop soon and finish up tomorrow, my neck hurts.

Rap
Sep 1, 2007

BLITZ

He's the best quarterback ever folks. and he's not going to play in another subber bowl

Mike Tahoe
May 21, 2007

He knows what it means.


The Cardinal head is still my favorite, but the Dolphin is a close second.

Grittybeard
Mar 29, 2010


The Seahawk is by far my favorite (until someone does a Chiefs one), I can't really put my finger on why.

Real hurthling!
Sep 11, 2001



Febreeze posted:

Yay! A new home for my stupid pictures!

I may have to stop soon and finish up tomorrow, my neck hurts.

When you do the Jets, please go all out.

Febreeze
Oct 24, 2011

I turn my gaze out upon the field and forever burned into my eyes is a sorry pageant of spectacular failure


Lions are looking up as of lately!

AndrewP
Apr 21, 2010

Ball Hard Enough.


Oh my god, every one of those pictures made me laugh out loud.

Manning2Fitz would be loving incredible. I'm rooting for this.

SquirrelyPSU
May 27, 2003

JESUS CHRIST, BEN!?!?
WHAT THE FUCK?


Hahahahahahhahahaha who did all of these?

e: I just read the other thread. Bra-loving-vo Febreeze.

Ribsauce
Jul 29, 2006

Blacks in the back.


Schefter really thinks it could be the Titans. He said the 5 teams are:

Miami
Washington
Titans
Jets
Cardinals

Tahm Bwady
Aug 7, 2008

Its 1 thing to jump and be able to land on 2 feet but I had no idea I was landing in Heaven.Hope all is well on this good Friday

Febreeze posted:

Yay! A new home for my stupid pictures!

I may have to stop soon and finish up tomorrow, my neck hurts.

I guess you kinda catch it after awhile

Professor Funk
Aug 4, 2008

~NOW THAT'S FUCKING JETS FOOTBALL~



I wouldn't be shocked if the 49ers made a run for him. What's their cap situation like if he becomes a FA?

Also that Bengals Pey-tar literally has me in tears.

Twat McTwatterson
May 31, 2011


SteelAngel2000 posted:

the Dolphins have been searching for a quarterback to replace Dan Marino since Dan Marino retired.

lol

Nail Rat
Dec 29, 2000

Haters gonna hate


No way Jim Harbaugh takes a flier on an injured Manning after Alex Smith just surpassed expectations in a game manager role. He's reliving his Captain Comeback years vicariously through Smith.

jeffersonlives
Jul 22, 2007

"Mathewson pitched against Cincinnati yesterday. Another way of putting it is that Cincinnati lost a game of baseball."


The Jets are going to have to be quite delicate with this one, because they absolutely should go after Manning but if they do so publicly without getting him it's going to be an enormous clusterfuck given the vote of no confidence that would show in Sanchez.

Nail Rat
Dec 29, 2000

Haters gonna hate


jeffersonlives posted:

The Jets are going to have to be quite delicate with this one, because they absolutely should go after Manning but if they do so publicly without getting him it's going to be an enormous clusterfuck given the vote of no confidence that would show in Sanchez.

headline: Jets realize Sanchez sucks, no one surprised

Professor Funk
Aug 4, 2008

~NOW THAT'S FUCKING JETS FOOTBALL~



If the Miami Dolphins seem to be trying hard to get him the Jets have to make an attempt to acquire him because playing Peyton Manning and Tom Brady twice apiece would be loving hellish

hcreight
Mar 19, 2007

Realistic Sucking Action


Professor Funk posted:

If the Miami Dolphins seem to be trying hard to get him the Jets have to make an attempt to acquire him because playing Peyton Manning and Tom Brady twice apiece would be loving hellish

God hates the Bills.

schweens
Jan 14, 2011



Professor Funk posted:

If the Miami Dolphins seem to be trying hard to get him the Jets have to make an attempt to acquire him because playing Peyton Manning and Tom Brady twice apiece would be loving hellish

Bills outbid Jets and Dolphins. Trade Fitzpatrick to the Browns.

Nail Rat
Dec 29, 2000

Haters gonna hate


I'm so loving sick of hearing people fighting over our quarterback and where he's going to go. I hope he goes and plays for the loving Als and wins fifteen Grey cups in a row

ROSS MY SALAD
Feb 22, 2007

X-Thames got the defense on lock.


Grantonio posted:

Bills outbid Jets and Dolphins. Trade Fitzpatrick to the Browns.

Fitzpatrick develops extreme case of staph infection after the press conference, suddenly retires.

Real hurthling!
Sep 11, 2001



jeffersonlives posted:

The Jets are going to have to be quite delicate with this one, because they absolutely should go after Manning but if they do so publicly without getting him it's going to be an enormous clusterfuck given the vote of no confidence that would show in Sanchez.

At this point I don't care if he feels the pressure. Reports from the lockerroom make it seem like he is too comfortable.

Plus it's peyton manning, not some untested new experiment gunning for marks job.

Rex needs to visit Peyton and show his commitment by burning all his offense notes/materials, and brutally sacrificing Wayne Hunter in his honor.

Rap
Sep 1, 2007

BLITZ

Browns were cheated, it's just a stretched Manning. Combine him with the Browns bulldog image please. Also you can tell by how demanding i'm being that these logos really, really really own

Professor Funk
Aug 4, 2008

~NOW THAT'S FUCKING JETS FOOTBALL~



1. Jets spend countless millions to sign Peyton Manning

2. Peyton Manning starts first preseason game

3. Wayne Hunter is Wayne Hunter

4. Peyton Manning literally dies on the field

Real hurthling!
Sep 11, 2001



Professor Funk posted:

1. Jets spend countless millions to sign Peyton Manning

2. Peyton Manning starts first preseason game

3. Wayne Hunter is Wayne Hunter

4. Peyton Manning literally dies on the field

Do you have to pay out a dead man's contract?

Febreeze
Oct 24, 2011

I turn my gaze out upon the field and forever burned into my eyes is a sorry pageant of spectacular failure


I know the Panthers aren't a contender but gently caress it I said I was doing all of them.

CharlestheHammer
Jun 26, 2011

If only the niggersoverly excitable young men could celebrate like good young white menTebow.

Real hurthling! posted:

At this point I don't care if he feels the pressure. Reports from the lockerroom make it seem like he is too comfortable.

Plus it's peyton manning, not some untested new experiment gunning for marks job.

Rex needs to visit Peyton and show his commitment by burning all his offense notes/materials, and brutally sacrificing Wayne Hunter in his honor.

This would be great for a new season of hard knocks: Off-season edition.

A.o.D.
Jan 15, 2006

Greatest of the SpaceNuts

Febreeze posted:

I know the Panthers aren't a contender but gently caress it I said I was doing all of them.



themostdisapproval.jpg

Barudak
May 7, 2007

No no, I'm Sean Mexico. You must have me mistaken for someone else.

Professor Funk posted:

4. Peyton Manning literally dies on the field

"Three weeks from now, I will be in the playoffs. Imagine where you will be, and it will be so. Hold the line! Block for me! If you find yourself alone, running on the green fields with the sun on your face, do not be troubled. For you are in Stadium Elysium, and you are already dead!"

ROSS MY SALAD
Feb 22, 2007

X-Thames got the defense on lock.


Febreeze posted:

I know the Panthers aren't a contender but gently caress it I said I was doing all of them.



Bahahaha

hcreight
Mar 19, 2007

Realistic Sucking Action


I'm starting to picture a scary alternate universe where every animal in existence has an enormous forehead.

Declan MacManus
Sep 1, 2011

I do remember one thing.

Febreeze posted:

I know the Panthers aren't a contender but gently caress it I said I was doing all of them.



These are loving amazing, Febreeze.

Democrazy
Oct 16, 2008
HOLY SHIT AM I A PRETENTIOUS DOUCHEBAG OR WHAT?
AND NOW I'M OFF TO HARASS ASIAN WOMEN AT STARBUCKS WITH DERANGED HAIKU (PLEASE HOLD ME)


jeffersonlives posted:

The Jets are going to have to be quite delicate with this one, because they absolutely should go after Manning but if they do so publicly without getting him it's going to be an enormous clusterfuck given the vote of no confidence that would show in Sanchez.

It certainly would be interesting to see how he and Sparano collaborate in order to install an offense. I can't imagine he's going to want terrible much ground-and-pound in there.

Barudak
May 7, 2007

No no, I'm Sean Mexico. You must have me mistaken for someone else.

hcreight posted:

I'm starting to picture a scary alternate universe where every animal in existence has an enormous forehead.

Don't go any further or you'll get all of GBS declaring they can't sleep anymore and that their scared of forehead panther so much they peed themselves.

Espy
Apr 21, 2010

Would you draft me?
I'd draft me.
I'd draft me hard.


So I came back to the forums and saw the Peyton Manning thread exploded with posts, expecting news.

Instead I got this.



My smile is so goddamn huge right now.

These past few months have been amazing for hilarious content.

A.o.D.
Jan 15, 2006

Greatest of the SpaceNuts

SolidPolonium posted:

So I came back to the forums and saw the Peyton Manning thread exploded with posts, expecting news.

Instead I got this.



My smile is so goddamn huge right now.

we need a version of except it's actually :manningface:

Espy
Apr 21, 2010

Would you draft me?
I'd draft me.
I'd draft me hard.


A.o.D. posted:

we need a version of except it's actually :manningface:

Oh god why does this not exist. It would be my new disappointment emote.

Professor Funk
Aug 4, 2008

~NOW THAT'S FUCKING JETS FOOTBALL~



SolidPolonium posted:

Oh god why does this not exist. It would be my new disappointment emote.

I think a new with Manningface would be loving incredible

Espy
Apr 21, 2010

Would you draft me?
I'd draft me.
I'd draft me hard.


Professor Funk posted:

I think a new with Manningface would be loving incredible

To be honest Negative Man already does have a Manning Face.

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wilderthanmild
Jun 21, 2010

Posting shit


Rap posted:

Browns were cheated, it's just a stretched Manning. Combine him with the Browns bulldog image please. Also you can tell by how demanding i'm being that these logos really, really really own
...but the Browns getting screwed just makes so much more sense than giving them anything at all.

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