March N/V: FLAMINGOS ARE...A GO? (Awesome starts on page 46)

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > March N/V: FLAMINGOS ARE...A GO? (Awesome starts on page 46)

How exited are you now? This poll is closed.
Really excited	76	46.34%
Kind of excited	16	9.76%
Not really excited	6	3.66%
My team sucks, why bother	6	3.66%
My team sucks, this is going to rule	51	31.10%
Which teams will be good, I need to know who to root for	9	5.49%
Total:	164 votes

[Edit Poll (moderators only)]

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

Spaceman Future! posted:

This had better start a dinger machine arms race. I want one at Coors that has retarded looking grizzly bears climbing a mountain and a seedy looking prospector dancing a happy mountain crazyman jig.

This sounds magnificent.

# ¿ Mar 2, 2012 19:18

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# ¿ Apr 23, 2024 17:49

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

I created this sophisticated rendering to show how large the dinger machine ought to be.

# ¿ Mar 3, 2012 01:18

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

Grozz Nuy posted:

But it's still gonna hurt seeing Tim in another uniform in 2014.

The rest of the division will not miss him.

# ¿ Mar 9, 2012 09:09

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

Grozz Nuy posted:

Only if it means Brandon Belt gets to hit either a double or a home run in every at bat.

He does, but it'll be in AAA so who cares?

# ¿ Mar 10, 2012 02:11

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

Grozz Nuy posted:

gently caress you i hope kershaw blows his elbow out

Hey now, all I'm asking for is incompetence in the Giants front office, not bodily harm to any of the players.

# ¿ Mar 10, 2012 04:15

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

Grozz Nuy posted:

I wasn't being serious, hence the lowercase. But we're suffering enough from this poo poo as it is. If Belt is in Fresno on Opening Day I'm going to be royally pissed.

I know, I would be too in your situation.

# ¿ Mar 10, 2012 06:51

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

Mr. Misrule posted:

The hot stove has cooled, but real baseball has not yet begun. The Dinger Machine's bright lights provide our only warmth in the chilly void.

an elegant explanation of the SAS hivemind indeed!

# ¿ Mar 10, 2012 20:11

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

tadashi posted:

I suspect Cabrera will spend most of the season making routine plays look pretty challenging.

It would be pretty great if he can do it enough to make dumb talking heads think he's a plus defender at 3B.

# ¿ Mar 12, 2012 17:53

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

FairGame posted:

Needs more dickshots, though--either the triple dick HBP, Holliday, or Dan Johnson

Always happy to oblige on that one.

# ¿ Mar 14, 2012 04:59

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

Abel Wingnut posted:

Who is BNightengale?

Condolences, Dodgers.

I knew there was a reason I didn't want Cohen to win!

# ¿ Mar 15, 2012 01:49

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

Perhaps you've heard of one Clayton Kershaw?

# ¿ Mar 15, 2012 01:59

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

brainguy posted:

colletti will sign cain to a 6 year deal & he will be hurt/lovely for 5.5 of them

colletti better be out of a loving job by the time Cain hits free agency.

# ¿ Mar 18, 2012 06:16

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

tadashi posted:

Views: That cover quote is totally wrong. Albert is in blue, guess who's in red? I'll give you one guess. One guess.

This is .OBP but .wOBA is pretty close to this as well.

And it's not like Barold is the only one either...

or by cumulative WAR:

Ted Williams had the same career WAR at age 31 as Pujols, despite missing 3 full seasons in his prime due to WW2.

# ¿ Mar 22, 2012 22:18

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

If you want context-adjusted, batting only:

here's OPS+ through age 31, (min 1000 games, since 1919)

code:

Babe Ruth	218
Ted Williams	193
Rogers Hornsby	185
Lou Gehrig	183
Mickey Mantle	177
Stan Musial	172
Albert Pujols	170
Jimmie Foxx	170

# ¿ Mar 22, 2012 23:44

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

I want a bone like that.

# ¿ Mar 27, 2012 00:35

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

The Pussy Boss posted:

Posting the Game 1 Vlad in the outfield highlights for those who may not remember. Although, holy poo poo, dude still has a gun for an arm, or did in 2010 anyway.

The first play isn't bad really. That's an awkward corner behind the bullpen mound and he handled it fine. The other two... well maybe he was just a bit rusty?

# ¿ Mar 27, 2012 18:58

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

Captain Tolerable posted:

Poster suggested I post this in the N/V because it's pretty cool:

Also, these seem topical for the Japan opening day:

Bernie Williams, Jason Giambi, and Barry Bonds mash dingers in ridiculous ways on a Japanese Game Show.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F_WgKkQ4NBw

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sWi33smf4LQ

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iIe9FkZv4Uw

I like the bit where Giambi is asking if the trampoline pitcher is warmed up and ready, and off screen Barry says, "yeah he's good, lets go, man, we better hurry up, I want some chicken wings."

# ¿ Mar 27, 2012 21:30

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

Crazy Ted posted:

True, but how many people outside of California really know that he owns a shitload of movie theaters? Or owned a bunch of franchised Starbucks?

I think this is it. Everyone in LA knows Magic has been wildly successful in his business ventures, but the rest of the country may very well have no clue.

# ¿ Mar 29, 2012 05:04

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

Grozz Nuy posted:

This is doubly awesome for me because it's a division rival.

# ¿ Mar 30, 2012 08:35

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

FairGame posted:

I hope MLB hires Jim Leyland and Tommy Lasorda for front office jobs too.

Get them all in the same room at once, then allow them to gorge themselves to death on their favorite vices.

For TLR, alcohol.
For Leyland, tobacco.
For Lasorda, food.
For Torre, Scott Proctors.

Lasorda is in his 80's and already has a job as figurehead/mascot in the Dodgers organization. I think he's happy where he is and wouldn't really want an MLB position.

# ¿ Mar 30, 2012 18:50

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# ¿ Apr 23, 2024 17:49

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

Strawberry Panda posted:

Were people that reported that Hanley and Reyes were friends when Reyes signed and Hanley wouldn't be pissed about switching positions actually reporting for the future? Now they're BFF and have dyed their hair (including eyebrows!) orange.

need pics of this

# ¿ Mar 30, 2012 20:36

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