20 Team Fantasy League Season 4: Bounty Programs Aint Crazy Y'All

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The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium* > The Armchair Quarterback > 20 Team Fantasy League Season 4: Bounty Programs Aint Crazy Y'All

JetsGuy: Sep 17, 2003; science + hockey
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_{Dear God, this is season 4? I need to get a (serious) girlfriend. More appropriately, a wife to yell at me for running this poo poo every year.}

NO LONGER ACCEPTING ANY NEW SIGN-UPS FOR ANY LIST

It's once again time to face the perfect storm of the 20-team fantasy league. Enjoy the maddening choice of starting the Colts or Rams as your D/ST in your battle against the guy who has to start Braylon Edwards as his #1 WR.

The 20-team fantasy league enters its FOURTH season this year, and as any of the vets can tell you, it is a BLAST. By now, you know how popular this gets, and so please act soon to get your spot. There are plenty of goons who want to snatch your spot!

READ ALL THIS BULLSHIT, EVEN IF YOU'VE PLAYED BEFORE

DRAFT IS CURRENTLY SET FOR SUNDAY, Aug. 19 at 8:30 PM EASTERN TIME

Members
Priority goes to the 20 lucky gents (and gals??) who got into the league last year. These guys will have til about Aug. 1 to tell me IN THIS THREAD that they are going to participate. I am not psychic, and I really don't keep up with HILARIOUS INSIDE JOKES, so I do not know if you've changed your username, so you know, lemme know if you did that. Also, if you're changing your team name, tell us so we can update the OP. IF YOU ARE A RETURNING MEMBER, ALSO POST IN THE LEAGUE PAGE TO CONFIRM YOU CAN ACTUALLY READ.
Aside from our one banned member, y'all came back, I'm impressed!

Second priority goes to people who are still interested from last year's waiting list. There were seven of you, and you are listed below. The way I decided to handle this is that these people get priority over the newbies, but only if you explicitly tell me they are interested now. IT IS FIRST COME FIRST SERVE FOR PEOPLE IN THIS GROUP. THIS IS LARGELY A TEST TO SEE WHO IS ACTIVE AND WHO JUST DROPPED IN AND WANTED ON THE LIST. Those of you who PM'd me back are already in the current wait list.
You've had your chance. All further interested parties get put on the wait list in order.

~~Third priority goes to anyone and everyone else, in the order you post here.~~
We're full. Sorry guys, better luck next year!

Scoring
This can be debated, but I think the way scoring worked in the last years has worked very well. Return yards have worked very well for the league's depth, particularly for the D/STs. For quick reference, here it is:

BREAKDOWN
The draft *does* take time, but really the roster is smaller than most. Most people seemed happy with the way the rosters were last year, but we are always up for debate to expand it (contracting is out of the question). ~~It's right now:~~
League has voted to expand rosters. It is now:

QB, RB, WR, RB/WR/TE, RB/WR/TE, TE, D/ST, K, 5 BE, 2 IR

DRAFT
We will be doing a live draft again like the last two years, and the less said about the literally day-long offline draft we did during season 1 the better. I'm amenable to changing the draft date *a little*, but I really want to keep it as is unless I've been an idiot and scheduled it during a holiday. Please plan your schedules accordingly. Set your rankings, and get a friend to draft for you if need be.

Draft order will be randomized after the league is officially filled. IF YOU TRADE DRAFT PICKS BEFORE THE DRAFT ORDER IS DETERMINED, THESE WILL BE RESET.

DRAFT ORDER SET, FEEL FREE TO TRADE PICKS

League Logistics
~~I have yet to set up the schedules. As the vets know, this takes me time to do...~~
SCHEDULES SET UP
your schedule will look like this:
-8 division games
-3 conference games
-2 OoC games

I kinda like the idea of us building up a rivalry with longevity, so divisions will stay the same. If you can come up with a better name for the divisions, lemme know. The AFC and NFC conferences will be placed on other ends of the real playoffs when the time comes. If you can't understand which is which,

.

SEASON 4 LUNATICS

code:

SA NAME                TEAM NAME
JetsGuy                Franklin's VU Bitches
chrix                  Naptown Sleepers
Pain of Mind           San Francisco PoM
Silly Burrito          FEAR BONERS 
commish                Baller Status
bbf2                   Stevie J's Hand gun Emporium
wasianchickn           Wasian's Chickns
Power of Pecota        Akron Peppercorns
seventeen              The Hot Dog Heros
tuckfard               Rated R Superstars
Eltoasto               Spinnin' Frennys
darkwolf220            Virginia Vultures
MikeyKins              Sesame Berts
Scrotos                Skokie Jews
tadashi                Breesus Christ
braksgirl              Annie's Boobs
halonx                 Wisconsin Cows
FlyWhiteBoy            Hypo Gonadism
JuicedSixFo            Zoltan Mesko
warbles                Dirty Sanchize

(*ed guys haven't posted in the league page yet, and can be booted if they don't do so)

WAITING LIST

code:

Pron on VHS
der juicen
The Gobbledygooker
jabro
Tae
Suave Fedora
Jerome Agricola
Mr.Trifecta
TWiP
Stevie Lee
Cotato

LINK FOR THE LAZY:
http://games.espn.go.com/ffl/league...4&seasonId=2012

HALL OF HONOR:
Season 3

JetsGuy fucked around with this message at Sep 9, 2012 around 14:10

# ? Jul 23, 2012 16:10

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# ? May 21, 2013 00:48

JetsGuy: Sep 17, 2003; science + hockey
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This post is reserved for keeping a transcript of video trash talk through the season.

ALL RISE FOR OUR NATIONAL ANTHEM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6n1KPQmdddY

PRESEASON:

JetsGuy opened the floodgates with a league message:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h3tVhYsrFgY
Silly Burrito, our patron saint of LSU footbaw, responds to scandal:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7l0_KAnjcJE
Braksgirl seems intent on reminding us she's the only female in the league
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W0Yqnn97gKM

Week 2:
Silly Burrito took advantage of the fact that I was in the hospital with my insides split open to talk some serious poo poo:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?featu...d&v=gOnwAbKKbcQ

JetsGuy fucked around with this message at Sep 23, 2012 around 22:50

# ? Jul 23, 2012 16:10

JetsGuy: Sep 17, 2003; science + hockey
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Everyone must repeat this to be in the league:

JuicedSixFo posted:

Dear Daniel Constantine "Dan" Marino, Jr.,

I hereby declare, on oath, that I absolutely and entirely renounce all other divisions and abjure all allegiances and fidelity to any managers of said divisions; that I will support and defend The Dan Marino Division and laws of the 20 Team Fantasy League against all poo poo talkers, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I will bear arms on behalf of The Dan Marino Division when required by the commissioner; and that I take this obligation freely without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; so help me Dan. Amen.

JetsGuy fucked around with this message at Dec 22, 2012 around 00:25

# ? Jul 23, 2012 16:11

jabro: Mar 25, 2003; Cobra Commander

I'll be on the waitlist, please.

# ? Jul 23, 2012 16:28

Tae: Oct 24, 2010; Hello? Can you hear me? ...Perhaps if I shout? AAAAAAAAAH!

Put me on the waiting list, thank you.

# ? Jul 23, 2012 16:40

Suave Fedora: Jun 10, 2004

Waitlist me NOW. Please. I promise not to draft Brian Westbrook like last year.

# ? Jul 23, 2012 16:49

Jerome Agricola: Apr 11, 2010; Seriously,

who dat?

Put me on the waitlist, please.

# ? Jul 23, 2012 17:04

der juicen: Aug 11, 2005; God looked down and said "I must handicap that gamer, for no man may game better than I."

... but it only made me more powerful. Now I need but one hand to out-game a g

One day.

# ? Jul 23, 2012 17:19

chrix: Jan 3, 2004; AND I SAID
JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY

WHAT'S GOIN ON?

I'll be in again this year, but my team name has never been the Naptown Steelers (currently exists as Carson Palmer's Pain Station)

I'll probably use Naptown Sleepers this year.

# ? Jul 23, 2012 17:43

Silly Burrito: Nov 26, 2007; Not every Manning gets to win a Super Bowl.

I am in and pledge to bring a championship to the best division...LONG LIVE JOE MONTANA. ~~I may or may not keep the Crazy Honey Badgers. It's so last year.~~ In honor of me watching the League last night, the Honey Badgers are now THE FEAR BONERS. You will all learn to fear the FEAR BONERS.

I will make a request to bump the draft time to 8:30 Eastern if possible so that those dang kids can be put to bed. Silly kids, wanting to stay up.

Silly Burrito fucked around with this message at Jul 23, 2012 around 17:54

# ? Jul 23, 2012 17:46

Mr.Trifecta: Mar 2, 2007

I am down to give this a try this year if you are looking for owners.

# ? Jul 23, 2012 18:25

Suave Fedora: Jun 10, 2004

Silly Burrito posted:

I will make a request to bump the draft time to 8:30 Eastern if possible so that those dang kids can be put to bed. Silly kids, wanting to stay up.

This is a good idea.

# ? Jul 23, 2012 18:26

JetsGuy: Sep 17, 2003; science + hockey
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LASER SKATES

I have added all new people into the waiting list. If I missed you, please let me know and please accept my apologies in advance.

der juicen posted:

One day.

Since you are third, you stand a great chance of getting in. We always lose some people every year.

chrix posted:

I'll be in again this year, but my team name has never been the Naptown Steelers (currently exists as Carson Palmer's Pain Station)

I'll probably use Naptown Sleepers this year.

Hm. Have you been in since the beginning? Maybe you replaced Naptown, or maybe I just hosed up.

Also, please post in the league page so I know you can access it.

Silly Burrito posted:

I will make a request to bump the draft time to 8:30 Eastern if possible so that those dang kids can be put to bed. Silly kids, wanting to stay up.

This is acceptable, and I've moved it since I was thinking of doing this anyway. We can discuss time a lot easier than date, really. Much later than this won't work though because the draft took like 3 hours last year. Some of us will have work on Monday morning!

# ? Jul 23, 2012 18:39

JetsGuy: Sep 17, 2003; science + hockey
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I'd also like to propose the addition of another RB/WR flex position. I'd be amenable to making it a RB/WR/TE if you want, but I sincerely doubt there'll be a lot of teams with 2 TEs worth a poo poo.

I don't think we'd need to expand the bench for this change.

For this change to take place, I want to have consensus from the majority of owners. I'm particularly interested in the opinion of the vets, as you've already handled the rosters and scoring as they are now.

# ? Jul 23, 2012 18:45

Silly Burrito: Nov 26, 2007; Not every Manning gets to win a Super Bowl.

JetsGuy posted:

I'd also like to propose the addition of another RB/WR flex position. I'd be amenable to making it a RB/WR/TE if you want, but I sincerely doubt there'll be a lot of teams with 2 TEs worth a poo poo.

I don't think we'd need to expand the bench for this change.

For this change to take place, I want to have consensus from the majority of owners. I'm particularly interested in the opinion of the vets, as you've already handled the rosters and scoring as they are now.

What about just making the RB/WR a RB/WR/TE? I don't honestly care if we do add another spot, but we're going to be reaching deep into the pool for startable players. Half the fun, right?

# ? Jul 23, 2012 18:56

Suave Fedora: Jun 10, 2004

It's time for professional ~~accountant~~ tight-end Les Brown to become a common household name.

# ? Jul 23, 2012 18:58

commish: Sep 17, 2009

Of course I'm in.

# ? Jul 23, 2012 19:03

bbf2: Nov 22, 2007; "The White Shadow"

I'm back in it. Kinda want to change my name from "Something Handgun Emporium" since its not really topical anymore, but I've sort of established a brand with it so I can't change it now....

# ? Jul 23, 2012 19:41

chrix: Jan 3, 2004; AND I SAID
JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY

WHAT'S GOIN ON?

JetsGuy posted:

I'd also like to propose the addition of another RB/WR flex position. I'd be amenable to making it a RB/WR/TE if you want, but I sincerely doubt there'll be a lot of teams with 2 TEs worth a poo poo.

I don't think we'd need to expand the bench for this change.

For this change to take place, I want to have consensus from the majority of owners. I'm particularly interested in the opinion of the vets, as you've already handled the rosters and scoring as they are now.

more opportunities for wacky upsets sounds good to me.

# ? Jul 23, 2012 19:45

Silly Burrito: Nov 26, 2007; Not every Manning gets to win a Super Bowl.

bbf2 posted:

I'm back in it. Kinda want to change my name from "Something Handgun Emporium" since its not really topical anymore, but I've sort of established a brand with it so I can't change it now....

Feel the newness...try something out. You can always change it back later.

# ? Jul 23, 2012 19:57

wasianchickn: Sep 4, 2006; welp

I'm back, sticking with Wasian's Chickn's because eh.

I plan on not sucking as bad this year

# ? Jul 23, 2012 20:11

TWiP: Jul 12, 2006

Put me on the waitlist if there's still room, please.

# ? Jul 23, 2012 21:31

JetsGuy: Sep 17, 2003; science + hockey
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h3tVhYsrFgY

# ? Jul 23, 2012 21:42

Pain of Mind: Jul 10, 2004; You are receiving this broadcast as a dream...We are transmitting from the year one nine... nine nine ...You are receiving this broadcast in order t

Back in for a 4th straight playoff appearance. I don't really have a strong opinion about the addition of another flex.

# ? Jul 24, 2012 00:06

Silly Burrito: Nov 26, 2007; Not every Manning gets to win a Super Bowl.

JetsGuy posted:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h3tVhYsrFgY

Ahh, so commissioner Jetsguy has to have a pretty mouthpiece do all his talking for him as he shuns the limelight. JUST WHAT IS JETSGUY HIDING????

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7l0_KAnjcJE

# ? Jul 24, 2012 02:26

Stevie Lee: Oct 8, 2007; Chief Rocka

Put me down on that waitlist. I love 20 team leagues.

# ? Jul 24, 2012 02:59

JetsGuy: Sep 17, 2003; science + hockey
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Silly Burrito posted:

Ahh, so commissioner Jetsguy has to have a pretty mouthpiece do all his talking for him as he shuns the limelight. JUST WHAT IS JETSGUY HIDING????

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7l0_KAnjcJE

omg, I seriously laughed at this for five minutes straight.

Also, where's my Canes' bitch?

PS - There's this place where I'm at which is literally Canes but with lovely stadium-style chicken instead. They even have psuedo-Canes sauce the Canes box meal. In summary, not Canes, but a tease.

JetsGuy fucked around with this message at Jul 24, 2012 around 03:23

# ? Jul 24, 2012 03:10

Silly Burrito: Nov 26, 2007; Not every Manning gets to win a Super Bowl.

JetsGuy posted:

omg, I seriously laughed at this for five minutes straight.

Also, where's my Canes' bitch?

PS - There's this place where I'm at which is literally Canes but with lovely stadium-style chicken instead. They even have psuedo-Canes sauce the Canes box meal. In summary, not Canes, but a tease.

Go to your mailbox and wait. It's coming. Don't worry if it takes awhile. It'll get there. Just keep waiting....

I actually read somewhere that we're getting a Zaxby's here sometime. Can't imagine that it'll really take over with Cane's everywhere, but who knows. Baton Rouge is serious about its chicken fingers.

# ? Jul 24, 2012 03:26

The Gobbledygooker: Apr 5, 2007

I would be interested.

# ? Jul 24, 2012 04:35

JetsGuy: Sep 17, 2003; science + hockey
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The Gobbledygooker posted:

I would be interested.

As you were on the old list, you got bumped above the line.

On a related note, I'll only allow old wait listers to do this for another 24 hours. After that, your priority status is banished to the abyss.

# ? Jul 24, 2012 14:56

Power of Pecota: Aug 3, 2007; It is not this bad, there is hope, there is charity, there is sufficient joy, there is compassion, blah blah blah blah Charles Dickens' three ghosts visit Scrooge and he wakes up to life blah blah blah blah...

I'm back. I'm getting kind of sick of fantasy sports, but I can't leave this league.

# ? Jul 24, 2012 17:16

seventeen: Jan 2, 2005; Do not try and score on the powerplay. That's impossible. Instead... only try to realize the truth.

What truth?

There is no powerplay.

Hot Dog Heroes are returning for another season of frustration and embarrassment. I'll post in the espn thread later when I get home from my busy work schedule of hurling furniture around the building indiscriminately and then alligning it like tetris pieces (hey guys I got a weird job)

# ? Jul 24, 2012 18:25

JetsGuy: Sep 17, 2003; science + hockey
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LASER SKATES

As of now, you no longer have the opportunity to claim priority status if you were on last years wait list. The old list has been purged, and all newcomers will be put at the bottom of the current list.

Thank you.

# ? Jul 25, 2012 13:23

Cotato: Mar 25, 2002

Any spots left in this league? Seems loving ridiculous with 20 teams

# ? Jul 25, 2012 16:58

JetsGuy: Sep 17, 2003; science + hockey
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Cotato posted:

Any spots left in this league? Seems loving ridiculous with 20 teams

You'll go on the waiting list. Given the size of the waiting list, it's very likely you'll have to wait until next season, but stay tuned!

# ? Jul 25, 2012 17:06

tuckfard: Dec 8, 2003; Just chillin

Still in, this is my favorite league I play in.

Not sure what this says about my life.

# ? Jul 25, 2012 17:13

Silly Burrito: Nov 26, 2007; Not every Manning gets to win a Super Bowl.

Cotato posted:

Any spots left in this league? Seems loving ridiculous with 20 teams

It is. Grab your defense and kicker early (second round or so) before they all go.

# ? Jul 25, 2012 17:23

Eltoasto: Aug 26, 2002; We come spinning out of nothingness, scattering stars like dust.

The Spinnin Freeney's are back to watch their 1st and 2nd round picks inevitably get seriously injured. Maybe I should just draft Patriot players.

# ? Jul 25, 2012 17:42

darkwolf220: May 14, 2009; Did someone say 'shootout'?

You know I am back for this. The Vultures are a perennial contender and they are due. Also posted on the league page.

# ? Jul 25, 2012 18:01

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# ? May 21, 2013 00:48

MikeyKins: May 9, 2004; Dan, there's a reason why we get emails calling you Le Bafart, Le Baturd, Le Bajerk...

Sesame Berts back to defend their streak of spectacular choke jobs

# ? Jul 25, 2012 18:06

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