Polar Seltzer saved my life - The Something Awful Forums

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omlette-a-gogo: May 26, 2010

I had a bad Coke habit that I couldn't kick. It was making me fat and tired and my pancreas was begging for mercy. Could never drink diet soda, hate that fake sugar taste plus I've kinda bought into the Aspartame conspiracy theory. But then my company started offering free Polar seltzer and I've been drinking that ever since. Not a single sugar soda in many weeks and I don't miss it at all. I even drink it at home now. Thanks Polar! You saved me from diabetes or worse for sure.

Although the store brand is 40 cents cheaper per 12-pack, and it is basically the same thing, so screw Polar.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:10

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 19, 2013 21:37

Bstyles: Jan 29, 2009; by Y Kant Ozma Post

Sweet dude!

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:11

The Cubelodyte: Sep 1, 2006; Practicing Hypnolaw since 1990

Cool shill, bro.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:12

TONY DANZAS HO: Aug 27, 2003; its exactly what you think it is

Wow that's a shame!

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:12

The Human Crouton: Sep 20, 2002; THRESHOLD!!!

Good for you. The only time I drink soda is when I hate myself.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:13

TheModernAmerican: Aug 31, 2011; My W will never let you into the endzone!

The carbonic acid can still cause harm.

Just drink water

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:14

Quixotic: Sep 2, 2004

Sorry to hear that, OP. I hope things turn around for you.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:15

Dead Cow: Nov 3, 2009; Passion makes the world go round.
Love just makes it a safer place.

How did you get over the lack of caffeine?

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:17

HelpImARock3: May 27, 2010; Don't get treed by a Chihuahua

Sounds like you should be thanking your company for offering it

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:18

Hogburto: Sep 26, 2005; BASELESS ACCUSATIONS

Killing yourself solves most problems, op.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:18

Griff the Cave Ape: Sep 4, 2011; I'd rather she hate me and thought I was good looking.

omlette-a-gogo posted:

Thanks Polar! You saved me from diabetes or worse for sure.

That is true, but those two options probably would have saved me from reading this thread, so...

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:18

Infidel Castro: Jun 8, 2010; WHATCHA GONNA DO, BROTHER?!

Is this supposed to be some sort of Kyoon-type thread, only instead of crazy conspiracy theories, it's corporate whoring?

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:20

VendaGoat: Nov 1, 2005; _{just bad poster}

omlette-a-gogo posted:

I had a bad Coke habit...

Yah. This is a good time to say this.

Kids, don't do crack.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:21

Gabriel Pope: May 16, 2009; diggle zone

The Human Crouton posted:

Good for you. The only time I drink soda is when I hate myself.

What a coincidence; the only time I drink soda is when I hate you, too (I go through two or three 12-packs a week.)

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:21

Anthrovore: Oct 12, 2009; EAT ROTTEN FRUIT FROM A SHITTY TREE

omlette-a-gogo posted:

screw Polar.

gently caress you guy, Orange Dry is the best. They also make a pretty good black cherry lime soda.

Soda chat ITT, whats everyones' favorite root beer?

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:31

never trust an elf: Aug 30, 2005

I did the same thing to kick a coke habit. Thanks Polar !

I was never fat though.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:32

demonachizer: Aug 7, 2004

Thanks for the update you gross individual.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:33

Toriori: Jan 4, 2012; No Yanda's allowed

How is it some people don't drink water. Does not compute.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:33

Miyamotos RGB NES: Dec 31, 2000

omlette-a-gogo posted:

I've kinda bought into the Aspartame conspiracy theory.

It's not really a conspiracy. I had a lot of trouble losing weight which made no sense because I was eating healthy and exercising daily. I stopped Diet Pepsi cold turkey and I began dropping weight like crazy. I read a lot of stuff that said aspartame actually makes your body "think" it's getting sugar, making weight harder to lose. I don't really understand but I can tell you stopping aspartame helped me health wise.

Seltzer is the best; I drink it all day long because water isn't refreshing to me for some reason. Plus it's cheap because brands of seltzer do not matter (unlike brands of soda making a difference). I got very addicted to seltzer when I was in Italy (they serve it instead of flat water) and I get a bit pissy when I go to a restaurant or fast food place and they don't have seltzer.

Well, that was my seltzer story, I hope you liked it OP.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:33

Pope Mobile: Nov 12, 2006; Talked to Jesus lately? More bars in more churches, synagogues, mosques and all other places of worship, guaranteed.

Anthrovore posted:

gently caress you guy, Orange Dry is the best. They also make a pretty good black cherry lime soda.

Soda chat ITT, whats everyones' favorite root beer?

Barqs. It has Bite.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:34

Michael Jackson: Sep 26, 2009

I switched to fake sugar aspartame soda and i have lost weight and is less fat. Thanks Aspartame! (i believe aspartame also gave me asbergers superpowers)

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:36

never trust an elf: Aug 30, 2005

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:37

Breaky: Jul 21, 2006; STRIKE FIRST
STRIKE HARD
NO MERCY SIR

What about other brands of Soda water?

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:38

Alkaphanel: Dec 29, 2008

Is seltzer the same thing as club soda?

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:40

Pope Mobile: Nov 12, 2006; Talked to Jesus lately? More bars in more churches, synagogues, mosques and all other places of worship, guaranteed.

This stuff actually looks pretty interesting but I've never seen it anywhere in Washington does anyone know where I can find some in the Seattle area?

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:40

Dead Inside Darwin: Jun 19, 2011; The cat problem in the park is Malthusian in scope.

Yes.

Polar is also disgusting seltzer. Vintage or

edit: My work offers 5 kinds of soda at all times, I would kill for seltzer.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:40

Goldmund: Nov 3, 2004; Old enough to be your brother

I just looked at their website, and this poo poo doesn't even have electrolytes! What the gently caress OP?

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:41

DrBouvenstein: Feb 28, 2007; I think I'm a doctor, but that doesn't make me a doctor. This fancy avatar does.

Pope Mobile posted:

Barqs. It has Bite.

Look at this guy. Look at how wrong he is.

The answer is Stewart's.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:41

Flaggy: Jul 6, 2007; Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn

What about Coupons? Stewarts has no bite.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:42

Sehnsucht: Aug 2, 2003; Damn you and your daily doubles you brigand!

The Human Crouton posted:

Good for you. The only time I drink soda is when I hate myself.

I thought I was the only one. This + Qdoba = method of quieting the barking dogs in my head.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:43

Predisposed: Jun 26, 2004; The next dreadful thing to a battle lost is a battle won.

Goldmund posted:

I just looked at their website, and this poo poo doesn't even have electrolytes! What the gently caress OP?

Obviously the seltzer bubbles will we rehydrate you.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:43

uwaeve: Oct 21, 2010; focus this time
so i dont have to
keep telling you retards
what happened

Pope Mobile posted:

This stuff actually looks pretty interesting but I've never seen it anywhere in Washington does anyone know where I can find some in the Seattle area?

Most bathrooms in the area should have toilets. Cruise in there and lift the lid, dip your cup in and enjoy. You get the genuine seltzer water taste experience without the expense or carbonation.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:44

Michael Jackson: Sep 26, 2009

I grew up drinking aspartame sweetened drinks and that is probably why i am on disability pension struggling with asbergers, bad eyesight, bad hearing, and hair on my nipples.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:44

Dead Inside Darwin: Jun 19, 2011; The cat problem in the park is Malthusian in scope.

Michael Jackson posted:

I grew up drinking aspartame sweetened drinks and that is probably why i am on disability pension struggling with asbergers, bad eyesight, bad hearing, and hair on my nipples.

See I grew up on HFCS sodas because I didn't like diet, so I only have hair on the tip of my penis.

# ? Aug 16, 2012 18:45