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Eggplant Wizard
Jul 8, 2005


i loev catte


Old Kink Thread OP posted:

Hi! Welcome to the new Kinky Sex megathread!
(For reference, the previous threads are here:
The Kinky Sex - BDSM - D/s Megathread
Ask about kinky sex, BDSM, and other fetishes.)


WHAT THIS THREAD IS FOR:
  • If you're vanilla, but curious, here's the place to ask folks about being kinky.
  • If you're a beginner or at any level of experience and need some tips or advice, ask away!
  • If you have experience and want to share your knowledge with others, please do!
  • Need some recommendations for gear, toys, lubes, places to go? We know these things!
  • Other stuff to do here: Share your experiences and get envy/sympathy from others.
  • Recommend good (or warn others about bad) kink-related products.

THE RULES LIST
  • Don't advocate anything illegal.
  • Keep it kink-related. Basic sex questions go in the sex questions megathread. This is not the place to ask how to lose your virginity.
  • Social justice arguments go in D&D. This is not the place for thought experiments, pedantry, circle jerks over semantics, or philosophical fapping. We are here to discuss getting our Kink on.
  • Be respectful. If you can manage it, be nice.
  • NO KINK SHAMING. Ok, so you like dressing up as an otter and pissing in a diaper, but you think people who like to dress up as a blue heron and piss in the bathtub are "EW OMFG THAT'S NASTY"? No. STFU. You do not get to tell people which kinks are good and which kinks are bad. Go make an E/N thread about your blue heron furry watersports outrage. Kink shaming also includes snide asides. These are never as subtle or clever as you think.
  • Don't import drama. Posting a kink-related news item is ok. Posting public announcements about kink events is good. Posting someone else's posts or PMs from another forum is a bad idea. Don't do it.
  • For the Experts: If you can't be helpful, be quiet. You don't have to answer every question. If someone posts a question about something you don't know about (rare as that might be!), or more likely, posts a question about a kink that you disapprove of, just skip that post. It's ok. You won't lose any Kink Points.
  • Don't feed the trolls or get sucked into stupid debates. Just report the dumbass and move on.

RESOURCES - WARNING: Links may contain NSFW content. (Duh.)

BOOKS:
GEAR
  • BearThings : "Handcrafted leather bondage goods, guaranteed for life! Simple as that. You break it, I'll replace it or repair it, free.... for life." He makes good stuff, has very good prices, and is an all-around swell guy.
  • CANE-IAC - for canes, paddles, and other spanking implements. Also has the standard blindfolds, collars, cuffs, clamps and rope.
  • Stockroom.com - Tons of stuff for pretty much every occasion.
  • Good Vibrations - More vanilla, but a very nice shop. Their harnesses are pretty nice, and they have some anal toys.
  • Extreme Restraints They have tons of stuff and frequently run some decent sales.
  • Lucky Stars Leather - handcrafted leather items
  • Aslan Leather - gear and whatnot for strap on sex; also packing stuff for transmen.
  • BDSM-GEAR.COM
  • sm85 - on eBay; the guy behind flogmebaby.com - same products but usually @20% cheaper than the main site.
  • Protocol Leather - a shop in central NC.

CONNECTIONS

OTHER USEFUL WEBSITES


SAFETY ISSUES (both physical and psychological)
  • Abuse in the D/s community - a series of blog articles starting with "There’s A War On Part 1: Trouble’s Been Brewing." Many other excellent articles there as well.



I will post more resources and links as they come up in the thread so people don't have to slog through a hundred pages.

Feel free to (re)introduce yourselves and suggest any resources & recommendations that should be in the OP.

Note: Yes, this has mod approval.

PLEASE NOTE: This is EPW now. I don't promise to watch every post in this thread, so please PM ME if you have any issues or concerns that don't warrant a report, OR if you want something added/changed in the OP.

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onecooldana
Jan 29, 2006

BLAH BLAH BLAH
BLAH BLAH BLAH
SEND 'EM A MESSAGE
BLAH BLAH BLAH


Hi new thread! Should we re-introduce ourselves?

Edit: Guess I will.
I'm Dana, 26 year-old female from sunny California. I like lots of things, but I don't like sharing them on a public forum! PM me for fetlife details if anything I say interests you.

Reene
Aug 26, 2005
Probation
Can't post for 5 hours!


So, anyone been to Club Sesso in Portland? Is the kink party as bad as it looks?

Hollismason
Jun 30, 2007


You left out the best part of fetlife, fetlife.txt twitter.

http://twitter.com/fetlife_txt

Best Quotes

quote:

Dragons do not say loving or anything else like you said (I think you're talking to Satan) they are noble creatures who has decent manners

quote:

I went to a gamestop midnight in my [ABDL] onesy.. game store manager could care less and they had the place packed with 10-17 year olds.

quote:

Really interesting and people who are lost need Jay [Wiseman] to help them find their one true road back.

robodex
Jun 6, 2007

They're what's for dinner


I hear fetlife_txt is goon run

Hi new thread, I'm not super kinky (at least, not as much into D/s) but I find it really interesting. I stopped following the last thread when there was a big flame war but I'll probably start following this one again.

thelightguy
Feb 6, 2007

Well there's your problem.


Communication is key

"I want to know if my partner would like to be spanked."
"Does my partner like to do x or are they just doing it to indulge me?"
"I want my partner to tie me up and cover me in honey and count chocula before licking it off."

Nobody in this thread can serve as a surrogate for your partner. Yes, it can be scary. Yes, there's no guarantee that they'll like or even indulge your kinks. But only they can give you an answer.

Oh, and don't discuss kinks when you're all hot and horny in bed. That never goes well.

(There was a much better post on this in the old thread but If somebody finds it I'll edit this out and put that one in.)

Shwqa
Feb 13, 2012



thelightguy posted:

Communication is key

Oh, and don't discuss kinks when you're all hot and horny in bed. That never goes well.
A million times yes to this. This is probably the most important rule of being kinky (tied with keeping things safe), especially if you want to dominate or be dominated. Both those desires require you to have trust in your partner and for your partner to have trust in you. If you don't trust them enough to talk to them about what you like in bed, why would you trust them enough to do said actions?

Tim Selaty Jr
May 16, 2011

by Pipski


Hollis posted:

You left out the best part of fetlife, fetlife.txt twitter.

My favorite is

quote:

First and foremost, there is not one shred of reliable evidence that a vegetarian diet increases psychic ability.

AbsoluteLlama
Aug 15, 2009

By the power vested in me by random musings in tmt... I proclaim you guilty of crustophilia!


Hi new thread. I, too, stopped following the last thread when the flames erupted. I'm sorta kinky. I'm more into pain than D/s stuff.

I've not been doing anything lately, as I sort of had an emotional breakdown after moving to Seattle. Back in the deep south I went to several bdsm groups and had fun, but I've been too nervous to do anything lately (which is stupid because I had to put effort and drive forever to go to places there, and I live less than 5 minutes away from cspc now but ).

Violet_Sky
Dec 5, 2011

A true warrior makes their life count, so that their death will not be without remembrance.


Hi, new thread, I'm Violet_Sky, a biological female who lurks here.

I'm taking a break from kink and dating right now due to me being busy with other life goals.

Hi, all!

dovetaile
Jul 8, 2011



Hi new thread! I'm dovetaile, a mostly submissive [certain kinks I top] kinky trans guy puppy who's happily collared/taken by a wonderful cis switch guy. I also mostly lurk but am willing to answer questions about puppyplay should they ever come up.

Waldorf Sixpence
Sep 6, 2004

Often harder on Player 2


What the hell. British switch from London, in a fantastic relationship with my switch girlfriend (previous fetish model and pro sub, so ask away about that if you want I guess ). We like it pretty rough so painplay is our big thing but we're looking to explore with humiliation and other stuff.

Behold! A Elk!
May 12, 2009


I was wondering if anyone could tell me how they took there kink from theoretical to real life. I have lots of fantasies and stuff but so far IRL my sex life has been pretty vanilla. I have noticed that most of my fantasies involve role play with me in a sub role. I am not sure if I am using the correct terms.

I am a very nervous person in general and I wonder if I had a chance to make my fantasies reality would I actually be into them. I also have a few that seem dangerous to do. Also there are my massive trust issues to overcome but that's more of a therapy thing.

Is there any way I could start trying some things alone somehow? Just to see how I feel about it. I realize its kind of impractical, it's not like I could tie myself up when nobody was home.

Oh yeah: MTF, US, pansexual, theoretical sub.

onecooldana
Jan 29, 2006

BLAH BLAH BLAH
BLAH BLAH BLAH
SEND 'EM A MESSAGE
BLAH BLAH BLAH


Behold! A Elk! posted:

I was wondering if anyone could tell me how they took there kink from theoretical to real life. I have lots of fantasies and stuff but so far IRL my sex life has been pretty vanilla. I have noticed that most of my fantasies involve role play with me in a sub role. I am not sure if I am using the correct terms.

I am a very nervous person in general and I wonder if I had a chance to make my fantasies reality would I actually be into them. I also have a few that seem dangerous to do. Also there are my massive trust issues to overcome but that's more of a therapy thing.

Is there any way I could start trying some things alone somehow? Just to see how I feel about it. I realize its kind of impractical, it's not like I could tie myself up when nobody was home.

Oh yeah: MTF, US, pansexual, theoretical sub.
I was just totally honest to my partners about what I liked. They participated where our interests met, and we had lots of fun. Really, don't be afraid to discuss them early and often!

Leon Sumbitches
Mar 27, 2010

Dr. Leon Sumbitches

Heir to the Adoso oil fortune.


Hi all, Orin here. I'm new to kink and am exploring my Dominant and sadist side with my submissive. She has years of experience on me, and has worked professionally as a Domme. I'm loving connecting with myself and with her in all these kinky ways, and her experience gives us a lot to work with.

I'm facing a little frustration lately with the D side of things. I totally 'get' the S/M part of our relationship, it comes naturally to me (once I got over "never hit a girl"). The D/s aspect is a little more vague to me, and although it gets me hot theoretically, I don't feel as naturally inclined to it as sadism. Any advice on how to explore? Communication = good, but I'm also looking more for resources on Dom typologies, actual strategies rules and tactics, and the more psychological aspect of D/s.

tia.

FreelanceZenarchist
Jun 18, 2009


Behold! A Elk! posted:

I was wondering if anyone could tell me how they took there kink from theoretical to real life. I have lots of fantasies and stuff but so far IRL my sex life has been pretty vanilla. I have noticed that most of my fantasies involve role play with me in a sub role. I am not sure if I am using the correct terms.

I am a very nervous person in general and I wonder if I had a chance to make my fantasies reality would I actually be into them. I also have a few that seem dangerous to do. Also there are my massive trust issues to overcome but that's more of a therapy thing.

Is there any way I could start trying some things alone somehow? Just to see how I feel about it. I realize its kind of impractical, it's not like I could tie myself up when nobody was home.

Oh yeah: MTF, US, pansexual, theoretical sub.

What I've done typically was once established in the relationship,print out one of those lists partners go through of sexual activities (I would be very interested in this, somewhat interested, we're never doing this, etc.) and made myself known that way.

For myself I'm a male dominant in the US with a happy and devoted female sub. I'm also a fairly devout Buddhist, having begun practicing about 5 years ago. I've been kinky for as long as I can remember (I remember in the third grade putting a cat collar on a girl I was friends with and getting as aroused as a third grader can over it) and it wasn't until I began practicing Buddhism that I had any issues with it. Ive had a hard time meditating on feelings of loving kindness for all sentient beings and then afterwords slapping my SO around and calling her a slut.

Does anybody have similar experiences? If so any advice?

Leon Sumbitches
Mar 27, 2010

Dr. Leon Sumbitches

Heir to the Adoso oil fortune.


FreelanceZenarchist posted:

What I've done typically was once established in the relationship,print out one of those lists partners go through of sexual activities (I would be very interested in this, somewhat interested, we're never doing this, etc.) and made myself known that way.

For myself I'm a male dominant in the US with a happy and devoted female sub. I'm also a fairly devout Buddhist, having begun practicing about 5 years ago. I've been kinky for as long as I can remember (I remember in the third grade putting a cat collar on a girl I was friends with and getting as aroused as a third grader can over it) and it wasn't until I began practicing Buddhism that I had any issues with it. Ive had a hard time meditating on feelings of loving kindness for all sentient beings and then afterwords slapping my SO around and calling her a slut.

Does anybody have similar experiences? If so any advice?

Heya kinky-Buddhist buddy! I don't think that the biddsms and Buddhism are incompatible. What is your motivation for slapping your SO and calling her a slut? Is it anger? Are you intending to cause harm? OR Is it love? Are you communicating compassion in a way you both understand? I feel that if your actions are grounded in loving kindness, the outer manifestation of that might take on many forms -- even beating your sub with an old pizza box.

thelightguy
Feb 6, 2007

Well there's your problem.


Behold! A Elk! posted:

Is there any way I could start trying some things alone somehow? Just to see how I feel about it. I realize its kind of impractical, it's not like I could tie myself up when nobody was home.

You could, but self-bondage is how people end up hanging from a door handle with a belt around their neck. So, you know, you probably shouldn't.

Grushenka
Jan 4, 2009

There's nothing better than borsch.


Behold! A Elk! posted:

I am a very nervous person in general and I wonder if I had a chance to make my fantasies reality would I actually be into them. I also have a few that seem dangerous to do. Also there are my massive trust issues to overcome but that's more of a therapy thing.

From my own experience, desiring to do things that can be considered considered rather dangerous is fine, but I held off on doing them until I was comfortable doing so with my partner. It's a trust thing, you're right. Anyone can spank someone else or slap them around a bit, but I would not let someone punch me in the face if I'd only played with them once or twice. Some of the things you want to do might have to wait until you find a play partner/partner you trust and like.

It's not a race, any fantasies you have can be fulfilled eventually if you are patient.

cadre
Feb 27, 2011



FreelanceZenarchist posted:

What I've done typically was once established in the relationship,print out one of those lists partners go through of sexual activities (I would be very interested in this, somewhat interested, we're never doing this, etc.) and made myself known that way.

For myself I'm a male dominant in the US with a happy and devoted female sub. I'm also a fairly devout Buddhist, having begun practicing about 5 years ago. I've been kinky for as long as I can remember (I remember in the third grade putting a cat collar on a girl I was friends with and getting as aroused as a third grader can over it) and it wasn't until I began practicing Buddhism that I had any issues with it. Ive had a hard time meditating on feelings of loving kindness for all sentient beings and then afterwords slapping my SO around and calling her a slut.

Does anybody have similar experiences? If so any advice?

Me: Mid 20's female switch on the side of dominant, oh and I'm bi

So I am also a practicing Buddhist. Some days I feel like I am living two lives, one with my faith and one with my passion/love/everything else. I have had people try to justify things for me but I have yet to find a real way to deal with the giant gap between what I believe and what I enjoy. I am truly sadistic and twisted, but people rarely see that side of me because of this. I feel really guilty being that way. So let me know if you ever figure this out.

I have a question for the kinky thread. Well a couple but we will start with one. I have been toying with the idea of pansexuality but I am not sure if it is the right term for me. I feel like it is pretty drat close because I know that gender is not binary and I definitely don't see my attraction that way. I like to think that I date people, not gender roles. I'm not sure if the 'pan' term is accurate for me, however, because most of the people I know who identify that way seem to enjoy a lot of gender play, which I do not. I also have not had all that much experience with trans men or women (in a dating sense). I understand that the labels don't really matter but I'm just curious if anyone with more understanding here can explain things.

TL;DR: What's the deal with pansexuality? For anyone who identifies as pan, how did you come to that conclusion?

CHRISTS FOR SALE
Jan 14, 2005

"fuck you and die"


cadre posted:

Me: Mid 20's female switch on the side of dominant, oh and I'm bi

So I am also a practicing Buddhist. Some days I feel like I am living two lives, one with my faith and one with my passion/love/everything else. I have had people try to justify things for me but I have yet to find a real way to deal with the giant gap between what I believe and what I enjoy. I am truly sadistic and twisted, but people rarely see that side of me because of this. I feel really guilty being that way. So let me know if you ever figure this out.

Interesting. I would think your spiritual life shouldn't get in the way of what you enjoy, generally, unless of course the thing you enjoy is ruining your life, which is why many turn to religion to help them overcome drug addiction. Buddhists aren't bound by the rules of other religions which forbid acts that you enjoy, such as this, for various reasons. Buddhism, in my opinion, is a personal decision and a personal choice for your intellect, and has nothing to do with the rest of your life or the satisfaction of your more physical desires. However, it's easy to confuse because both BDSM and Buddhism play on your intellect, just different parts of it.

I don't know if that helps you or anything but those are just my thoughts reading this. I know plenty of people into really kinky sex, and then they get up and do Yoga or meditate.

Martytoof
Feb 25, 2003



Awesome.

Awesome to
the MAX.




Nothing to contribute, but I'm really intrigued to read the viewpoints from the Buddhist posters. I'm a non-practicing Buddhist-of-convenience and haven't really considered this.

cadre
Feb 27, 2011



CHRISTS FOR SALE posted:

Interesting. I would think your spiritual life shouldn't get in the way of what you enjoy, generally, unless of course the thing you enjoy is ruining your life, which is why many turn to religion to help them overcome drug addiction. Buddhists aren't bound by the rules of other religions which forbid acts that you enjoy, such as this, for various reasons. Buddhism, in my opinion, is a personal decision and a personal choice for your intellect, and has nothing to do with the rest of your life or the satisfaction of your more physical desires. However, it's easy to confuse because both BDSM and Buddhism play on your intellect, just different parts of it.

I don't know if that helps you or anything but those are just my thoughts reading this. I know plenty of people into really kinky sex, and then they get up and do Yoga or meditate.

Doing yoga or meditating are not the same as practicing Buddhism though. The basic ideas of Buddhism are to free yourself from suffering and not to cause the suffering of others. There's a concept that seeking pleasure will lead to your own suffering. Also, being a sadist kind of classes with the latter part.

Of course you can say that you are being compassionate, connecting with someone else, providing opportunities for growth or growing yourself. I'm sure that is a satisfactory answer for some people, but it does not work for me.

Edit: For what it's worth, I think the reason that those ideas don't cut it for me is that sometimes I just want to make someone hurt. And not because they want to hurt. In my every day life, I can definitely align my actions with Buddhism. But if you count the thoughts in my head, I'm a horrible Buddhist.

floofyscorp
Feb 12, 2007



cadre posted:

Doing yoga or meditating are not the same as practicing Buddhism though. The basic ideas of Buddhism are to free yourself from suffering and not to cause the suffering of others. There's a concept that seeking pleasure will lead to your own suffering. Also, being a sadist kind of classes with the latter part.

Of course you can say that you are being compassionate, connecting with someone else, providing opportunities for growth or growing yourself. I'm sure that is a satisfactory answer for some people, but it does not work for me.

Not a Buddhist, but I've had conversations along these lines with my bf who has been unsure at times how to feel about hurting me during playtime. I don't think causing someone pain is necessarily causing suffering if the person wants it and enjoys it. If you don't actually enjoy doing it that's another thing but if you're both having fun then I don't think there's really a problem.

Eyespy
Dec 20, 2004

When I talk about the doomed, the scum, the people who no longer give a shit...When I talk about the filth of the city...I'm talking about you.

Good morning new thread, I'm Eyespy, male dominant from the desert of BDSM that is rural Australia. I have a love of impact play, rope and power exchange, but I'm continually adding new things to what I enjoy as I get more chances to explore.

As an aside, has anyone ever ordered from Flogmebaby.com as mentioned in the OP? Their webdesign is pretty terrible, which is never a good sign.

Kaninrail
Dec 9, 2007

The most dreaded of all hobos are the squeegee-wielders. Run them over.


Eyespy posted:

As an aside, has anyone ever ordered from Flogmebaby.com as mentioned in the OP? Their webdesign is pretty terrible, which is never a good sign.

Haven't ordered from them, but awful webdesign is kind of a standard in smaller kink operations, sadly.

Sharks Below
May 23, 2011

ty hc <3


Eyespy posted:

Good morning new thread, I'm Eyespy, male dominant from the desert of BDSM that is rural Australia. I have a love of impact play, rope and power exchange, but I'm continually adding new things to what I enjoy as I get more chances to explore.


Sup, fellow rural Australia BDSM loner?

I'm a female sub, really only been exploring my sexuality in this way in the last couple of years particularly since I dated a guy who turned on all my sub switches. Pity he turned out to be a loving tool but anyway, he helped bring that side of me out and helped me make peace with it as a girl who is quite dominant in personality, so I'm grateful for that.

Being surrounded by conservative people who think 50 Shades of Grey is the height of titillation and who spout such things as "oh that poor girl he's clearly abusing her" about the BDSM element of their relationship but NOT THE PSYCHOTIC CREEPY STALKING poo poo is a real downer.

Eyespy
Dec 20, 2004

When I talk about the doomed, the scum, the people who no longer give a shit...When I talk about the filth of the city...I'm talking about you.

Sharks Below posted:

Sup, fellow rural Australia BDSM loner?

Which particular desolate hellhole are you in? I'm in north Queensland and found Fetlife an excellent way of making local contacts and friends, even if our munches never attract more than 9 people.

bar eats you
May 5, 2012


cadre posted:

TL;DR: What's the deal with pansexuality? For anyone who identifies as pan, how did you come to that conclusion?

The only appreciable difference I've seen between bi people and pan people is that pan people love to wank on about how much they're totally not bi. Also, the idea that 'being okay with trans people' ought to change your orientation has some pretty lovely implications.

e: 21, Sydney, bi trans girl sub, still hopelessly in love with a dude I can't have.

Sharks Below
May 23, 2011

ty hc <3


Eyespy posted:

Which particular desolate hellhole are you in? I'm in north Queensland and found Fetlife an excellent way of making local contacts and friends, even if our munches never attract more than 9 people.

Central Queensland. Fetlife freaks me out.

cadre
Feb 27, 2011



bar eats you posted:

The only appreciable difference I've seen between bi people and pan people is that pan people love to wank on about how much they're totally not bi. Also, the idea that 'being okay with trans people' ought to change your orientation has some pretty lovely implications.

e: 21, Sydney, bi trans girl sub, still hopelessly in love with a dude I can't have.

You are right. I suppose, I didn't word that very well. I'm not interested in attracting attention to myself with some hip new label. What I meant was, I know and love a few people who don't necessarily identify as cisgendered. Ultimately, it's a moot point but that doesn't mean I can't be curious. Some labels still confuse me.

FreelanceZenarchist
Jun 18, 2009


Tommy Wiseau posted:

Heya kinky-Buddhist buddy! I don't think that the biddsms and Buddhism are incompatible. What is your motivation for slapping your SO and calling her a slut? Is it anger? Are you intending to cause harm? OR Is it love? Are you communicating compassion in a way you both understand? I feel that if your actions are grounded in loving kindness, the outer manifestation of that might take on many forms -- even beating your sub with an old pizza box.

As far as I can explain it, my motivation is that BDSM is what excites both my sub and myself. I've actually never been sexually excited without some sort of BDSM component, whether it was physical or imagined in my head.


cadre posted:

Doing yoga or meditating are not the same as practicing Buddhism though. The basic ideas of Buddhism are to free yourself from suffering and not to cause the suffering of others. There's a concept that seeking pleasure will lead to your own suffering. Also, being a sadist kind of classes with the latter part.

Of course you can say that you are being compassionate, connecting with someone else, providing opportunities for growth or growing yourself. I'm sure that is a satisfactory answer for some people, but it does not work for me.

Edit: For what it's worth, I think the reason that those ideas don't cut it for me is that sometimes I just want to make someone hurt. And not because they want to hurt. In my every day life, I can definitely align my actions with Buddhism. But if you count the thoughts in my head, I'm a horrible Buddhist.

Then closest I've come to reconciling the two is along the lines you're talking about, that you're being compassionate to the other person involved, that they want this too, etc. Sometimes that's enough, but I can definitely relate to feeling some of my thoughts make me a "bad Buddhist". Many of the monks I study with are from Laos and don't speak much English, and to be honest I dread asking them for advice because I can't think of how to even begin explaining what BDSM is to them. The one American nun I've spoken too said that unlike other religions, Buddhism doesn't have "good sex" and "bad sex", since all sex leads to attachment and rising desires. According to her, as long as both parties agree to what is going on, and actual feelings of ill will aren't being expressed under the guise of roleplay, she sees no fundamental difference between kinky sex and vanilla.

One thing I've always found a little humorous is the (probably) unintentional similarities between Buddhist and BDSM protocol. When I'm at the temple, I sit at the feet of the monks reverently, and tend to their needs with lots of bowing and humility, at the same time following strict guidelines in how we interact (never offer anything from a position higher than them, never point my feet at them, head bowed and hands in prayer position when I speak to them). When I'm at home, my sub does a lot of the same for me. A bit of an interesting yet strange correspondence.

Waldorf Sixpence
Sep 6, 2004

Often harder on Player 2


So Buddhism is basically Gor then?

FreelanceZenarchist
Jun 18, 2009


Waldorf Sixpence posted:

So Buddhism is basically Gor then?

Yeah but with more orange robes

Eyespy
Dec 20, 2004

When I talk about the doomed, the scum, the people who no longer give a shit...When I talk about the filth of the city...I'm talking about you.

Sharks Below posted:

Central Queensland. Fetlife freaks me out.

Rockhampton? Gladstone? Worse than Gladstone? Ick.

I know that Fetlife can be confronting, particularly for women, but there are good people there as well.

The simple truth is that if you want to meet kinky people, you have to go where the kinky people are, and right now Fetlife is it, particularly given where you live.

Sling me a PM and I'll give you my Fet username so at least you'll have one person you 'know' on your friends list.

Powered Descent
Jul 13, 2008

We haven't had that spirit here since 1969.

Waldorf Sixpence posted:

So Buddhism is basically Gor then?

Om la kajira hum

Sharks Below
May 23, 2011

ty hc <3


Eyespy posted:

Rockhampton? Gladstone? Worse than Gladstone? Ick.

I know that Fetlife can be confronting, particularly for women, but there are good people there as well.

The simple truth is that if you want to meet kinky people, you have to go where the kinky people are, and right now Fetlife is it, particularly given where you live.

Sling me a PM and I'll give you my Fet username so at least you'll have one person you 'know' on your friends list.

Totally did PM you Want to pick your brain about some things!

Reinbach
Jan 28, 2009


I am Reinbach. I enjoy communication and meaningful enthusiastic consent. I also have trust issues having beeen hurt in the pastand as such am slow to develop deep relationships. I am not really sure where I fit in on the labeling spectrum. I can be the sweetest sadist you will ever see, or the meanest masochist you will ever meet. I try to give helpful advice when I can though I am relatively new to all this, I had to learn quickly and may be able to offer from that perspective.

keykey
Mar 28, 2003


Hey new thread! Keykey's one of my 3 names. Obviously, it's not my real name, nor is it the name my sub/wife calls me during play time. If you have kids and are into kink and need to ask anything, I can field whatever question you may have. Obviously, we don't call ourselves our "bedroom" names in front of the kids, that side only comes out when they are asleep. I'm mid-late 30's and live in CA. I like long walks on the beach, lasting friendships and love making my subs rear end red. There's always something new to try and methods to fall back on to that you know your sub enjoys. As said already, communication, communication, communication! And not just verbal communication, read your subs body language as well as listen for cues that you know s/he responds well to. Above all, enjoy yourselves!

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Leon Sumbitches
Mar 27, 2010

Dr. Leon Sumbitches

Heir to the Adoso oil fortune.


FreelanceZenarchist posted:

Sometimes that's enough, but I can definitely relate to feeling some of my thoughts make me a "bad Buddhist".

I don't want to derail, but I think this point is important for anyone, Buddhist or not:

You are not your thoughts. Even if you think about assassinating your father, choking your sub, raping and so on...you are not 'bad' for thinking those things. They're just thoughts, that's all, transitory and not real. Your actions are what define you.

Ok, back to the kinky stuff. I've been setting up some 'rules' for my sub lately -- contemplating our connection for 5-min a day then texting me about it, asking before she cums, polishing my boots every Tuesday night, as well as situational rules established on the fly. It's really been interesting and helpful in establishing our D/s connection.

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