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 What's all this then? From the company's beginning in 2002 until June 2004, Total Nonstop Action had no television show. Entertainment was instead provided by weekly PPVs until a large enough fanbase could be accrued, after which TNA Impact! took over on a regular basis. This left space for WWE/WCW-style monthly PPVs we all know and love, and it's those I'll be reviewing, starting with Victory Road 2004. Simples. x Why? I know very little about TNA. I have never watched a full TNA Pay Per View, and the only episode of Impact I tuned into was the absolute car-crash that aired alongside RAW that one time. I have always had a rather pro-WWE bias, and although I'd probably be able to name and recognise a lot of the current TNA roster, the only wrestlers I know about in any great depth are either ex-WWE superstars or ex-WCW vets. I only know that AJ Styles is incredibly agile and is (was?) something of a smark-darling. I only know that Samoa Joe is strong, hard-hitting, and put on a fantastic series of matches with CM Punk in ROH (which I've never seen). So I'll be entering this from a decently neutral perspective What do you look forward to? - Some great wrestling matches. Although I've never watched a full TNA show, I have caught the occasional match recommended to me by a friend or read about on a forum. These have usually impressed me a lot, both in contrast to the slower, simpler WWE style, and purely as matches in their own right. - The clash of some amazingly large egos and characters. Jarrett, Steiner, Sting, Hardy, Angle, Raven, and so on and so on and so on. - Developing new favourites. Who knows what's in store? (Well, most of you guys probably do. But I'm excited anyway.) What do you dread? - Well, Botchamania (and generally being a part of the IWC) has taught me that TNA is responsible for some spectacular, spectacular crimes to wrestling, sometimes even worse than Vince at his most farcical. Even though a rather morbid part of me can't wait to see how bad it gets, I can't imagine that it'll be enjoyable viewing. - Ludicrously confusing stipulations. I've had the King of the Mountain match explained to me several times and still don't quite understand. Hopefully seeing it live will set a few things straight. Ultimate X looks absolutely spectacular, but also on the verge of calamity at all times. - The arrival of Hogan. gently caress Hogan. I suppose through all of this, what I'll most eagerly anticipate is reading your response. Share your thoughts with matches, wrestlers and angles as we progress through TNA's glorious(?) history. I think it's about time to cross the line. JGKing fucked around with this message at Jan 5, 2013 around 20:41 |
| # ? Jan 5, 2013 20:29 |
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| # ? May 22, 2013 05:56 |
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You have made a bad choice. Good luck.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 20:53 |
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This is gonna be good. I look forward to the suffering.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 20:57 |
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For the Hustle, Loyalty, and Respect of Somaliland
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If you're starting at 2004 you're gonna be seeing a lot of great PPVs until around 2007.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 21:01 |
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This...this is a poor choice. You are going to emerge a different person from when you began. A person filled with much more bitterness and rage. Therefore, I'm monitoring this like crazy. I don't think one human being will be able to take this.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 21:04 |
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Cardboard Box posted:If you're starting at 2004 you're gonna be seeing a lot of great PPVs until around 2007. The first PPV is awful. The second PPV is pretty awful with one great match. Third PPV is pretty good, fourth is pretty awful with one great match, and then from there the quality nosedives until summer of 05. The second half of 2005 is very good, but 2006 is a year of mixed bags as well.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 21:15 |
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I'll be honest, I don't remember much of anything from 2004, but TNA had a lot of good shows in 2005 and 2006, I thought. I mean yeah, there were some bad ones, but they were mostly good.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 21:31 |
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All you need to know about TNA is that, even counting from the very beginning, 90% of the title changes are dumb as hell and 30% of the title matches are stupid. TNA has been very stupid since the very beginning.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 22:12 |
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Cardboard Box posted:I'll be honest, I don't remember much of anything from 2004, but TNA had a lot of good shows in 2005 and 2006, I thought. I mean yeah, there were some bad ones, but they were mostly good. This is basically what I remember as well. I usually mark Angle showing up as the beginning of the end. An end that's been going on forever now.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 22:32 |
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VICTORY ROAD - November 7th 2004  PART 1 A three hour epic event! Yes indeed. This is where my journey begins, and the poster is quite reassuring. This doesn't seem to be uncharted territory quite yet. I definitely recognise both Jeffs, as well as everybody's favourite scamp AJ Styles. I didn't immediately know who the fourth guy was, but it was a mystery quickly solved by the opening video package. An incredibly gruff voice informs me that it's Monty Brown (or Marcus Cor Von as I would later come to know him in WWECW). How terribly exciting. The gruff voice hypes AJ, who jumps around a lot, Monty, who tackles people a lot, and Jeff Hardy, who does all the Jeff Hardy stuff.  It looks good so far, but the highest praise is reserved for NWA Champion Jeff Jarrett.I suffer from a nasty little flashback here. When I first began to watch wrestling the WWF Champion was none other than The Rock, the most electrifying brahma bull ever to set foot in the squared circle. I loved him as a kid. All my friends did (and we all still secretly do. My Facebook news feed lit up when he beat Cena.) The WCW Champion at that time was Jeff Jarrett, and even as a 7 year old I could tell I hated him. Hopefully he can change my opinion 13 years later, but past experience tells me that my first exposure to any promotion with Jarrett as champ usually ends poorly. Turns out the main event will be Jarrett vs Hardy for the title, and either man will have an Outsider in his corner. Interesting (and potentially terrifying). Mike Tenay and Don West are incredibly excited, and why wouldn't they be, as the first match is....not yet!? Shane Douglas is a backstage reporter!? And he's in the parking lot as Jarret's limo arrives. Jeff solidifies my continued hatred almost immediately with the most criminally orange trousers ever seen. Apparently he's just been on the phone with Scott Hall (and that phone is VERY 2004. I'm surprised he can lift it). It's very depressing to watch the former ECW legend grovel before an NWA champ, microphone in hand. Anyway, according to Jeff, Da Bad Guy promises that Kevin Nash will not be here to interfere on Hardy's behalf. #ShockingDevelopments 1. 20-man X Division Invitational Battle Royale "The Coolest" Kazarian is first up, looking like an utter prick. Hopefully he's a heel. Sonjay Dutt is in next with music that sounds less Eastern & exotic, more ringtone in a microwave. Luckily I've heard of both, now let's see if they can wrestle. They lock up and it's all very high-paced and crisp so far. Some masked dude named Puma enters third. Don West introduces him with exactly the same forced excitement as Jerry Lawler introducing a jobber to the Rumble, so I don't think he'll last long in this match. LA Park is next (the whole La Parka/LA Park naming thing confuses me, so I won't even begin to discuss it here), and he's playing air guitar with a steel chair!  I immediately want him to win. My support is not hard to gain with antics like that. EVERYBODY EATS STEEL! And LA Park poses on the chair, arms-folded. I am in love. Now he can't get out of his entrance coat and tries to disguise his struggling with a jaunty dance. Please win this match. "Mr 630" Jerelle Clark sprints in and now I'm beginning to hunger for an elimination; it's all looking a bit full in there. Also, if I don't see a single 630 degree move from him I'll be furious. Miyamoto comes along and now I just want something to loving happen. JERELLE CLARK IS ON THE TOP TURNBUCKLE! Oh my god he hits a 630 senton, first time of asking. I was debating having an ironic "Number of 630 rotations performed by Jerelle Clark:" counter at the bottom of each post, but now he's really hosed that idea over. Kazarian's partner Matt Bentley arrives, and they hit a nice little double team move. OH THEY ELIMINATE PUMA! Finally somebody goes for a ride! Those two are in my good books. Jerelle goes too! Looks like they're trying to clear this ring and actually make the match a good one. AND MIYAMOTO also at the hands of the tag team! Good job boys. Hector Garza jogs down looking very oiled. He teams up with LA Park, because all Mexicans love each other I suppose. Dutt hits the best looking move of the match so far and I'm probably most impressed by him out of everybody so far. Nosawa is next, and Mikey Batts follows. Tenay and West get so excited for every entrant that I'm expecting each one to be an absolute killer, but they all end up doing a couple of flippy spots at 100mph and then nothing. They're like flies hitting a windshield. Alex Shelley is hyped as "a different kind of wrestler" during his entrance, and to be fair to him, he does manage to eliminate somebody pretty quickly. Shame it's Sonjay Dutt. LA Park goes too! Noooooo!  You're ripping my heart out TNA! The cameraman gets called out by Tenay for missing the elimination. IMO if I didn't see it, it doesn't count. Worked for Austin in '97. Get back in there LA Park!He doesn't. Instead Evan Bourne enters!? Matt Sydal in this neck of the woods, apparently. Sonny Siaki is next and looks double the size of everybody in there. He just starts hurling midgets around and it looks genuinely impressive. He chucks Nosawa, and seconds later Garza monkey-flips Mikey Batts to the outside. Jason Cross is unremarkable and next to arrive. Siaki fucks Garza and new entrant Psicosis have an exchange which is completely undercut by Shark Boy's turnbuckle punches on Bentley. Why do the crowd love him so much? Is it literally because he's dressed like a shark?"You ready to fear the fro, bro?" asks Mike Tenay, a middle-aged white man, as D-Ray 3000 bounds onto the scene. Oh, he's Shark Boy's wacky buddy. Yay. SIAKI CLOTHESLINES THEM TO THE FLOOR! gently caress yes! Amazing Red, a local infant, enters next. Why is Siaki selling his punches? That's like Undertaker snapping his head back for Funaki. The rather bland Cross eliminates the entertaining Shelley. There's no justice in the world. Spanky, whom I better recognize as Brian Kendrick, and Chris Sabin are entrants 19 and 20. They team up to eliminate Siaki. I assumed he was going to be the winner of this thing, he was coming across as a total beast.  I'll forgive Spanky though, because he just took Bentley out with the sweetest elimination of the match (shades of Mysterio on Orton, only back-first). Another impressive spot as all the wrestlers team up to create a pyramid-superplex kinda thing from one turnbuckle. That was decent. Psciosis deals with Cross in the aftermath before Red fucks him over. And now Kazarian eliminates Red! This match is finally improving, although I think that may just be because I can see the finish line. It's been quite tedious. Spanky tries a Sliced Bread #2 on Sabin, who says "gently caress that" and simply throws him out of the match. I enjoyed that spot - makes Sabin seem cold as a motherfucker. Suddenly we're down to three, and Sabin demolishes Kazarian with a sick release German-superplex! That was impressive, but why didn't he just shove him out of the ring? Sabin decides it's rear end-kicking time and starts dishing out the enziguris; he looks incredibly crisp in the ring. OH OBVIOUSLY that means it's time for Garza to eliminate him. So disappointing Apparently the final two must score a pinfall or submission to win, so here we go. Garza hits the most perfect moonsault this side of Kurt Angle. That was sexual. Kazarian with a snappy slingshot DDT. This really isn't bad at all but the match has burned me out. Garza heads up top again and misses a corkscrew! That man has hangtime. Kazarian goes for a roll up, Garza reverses and...that's it? That's the pinfall of this 25 minute match? Winner: Hector Garza - 2/5. Some impressive spots in there and nothing downright offensive, but a lot of this match was sloppy. A HELL of a lot of it was just not engaging, sadly. Most of the entrants reeked of jobberdom, and personally I feel the winner was a bad choice. From an entirely new viewer's perspective, I'd have preferred Siaki, Shelley, Sabin, or Kazarian to take that. They grabbed me most immediately, especially Chris Sabin who pretty much stole the show from his entrance onwards. Garza didn't really catch my attention at all until the final few minutes. Also the ending sucked. And so, here ends part 1. I wasn't really expecting such a mammoth match to kick things off, but hopefully the next part will consist of multiple shorter matches (I'm fairly confident TNA won't throw another long match my way so soon. Foolish of me?) Thanks for reading guys.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 22:47 |
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JGKing posted:I think it's about time to cross the line. It's no longer TNA Impact: Cross the Line. It is now Impact Wrestling: Where Wrestling Matters.  ps: godspeed, I can't wait until you hit Victory Road 2010, 2011, and HardCORE Justice. SNARF SNARF SNARF posted:All you need to know about TNA is that, even counting from the very beginning, 90% of the title changes are dumb as hell and 30% of the title matches are stupid. May we never forget Boxgate. Where the KO title changed hands through a box.  This wasn't on a PPV either.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 22:49 |
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DarkstarIV posted:It's no longer TNA Impact: Cross the Line. It is now Impact Wrestling: Where Wrestling Matters. Yeah his watching PPVs means he's not gonna see Boxgate through this, which is kinda sad. On the other hand he's going to watch Victory Road 09.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 22:53 |
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njsykora posted:Yeah his watching PPVs means he's not gonna see Boxgate through this, which is kinda sad. On the other hand he's going to watch Victory Road 09. He's going to watch Victory Road 2011 
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 22:57 |
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This is a terrible idea. You're never going to want to watch wrestling ever again.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 23:03 |
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At least we'll be reminded of when TNA was pretty decent for a while until it all goes to poo poo.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 23:18 |
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JGKing posted:It's very depressing to watch the former ECW legend grovel before an NWA champ, microphone in hand. Lets get one thing straight slappy, The Franchise < Jeff Jarrett. Jeff Jarrett is an entertaining mid-upper mid card heel, The Franchise has never done anything besides tell me where I can get pants at Target.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 23:21 |
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KildarX posted:Lets get one thing straight slappy, The Franchise < Jeff Jarrett. Jeff Jarrett is an entertaining mid-upper mid card heel, The Franchise has never done anything besides tell me where I can get pants at Target. That, sir, is a bold statement that will have VERY few proponents.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 23:24 |
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If you watch it in a vacuum void of the IWC ripping it apart for everything(sometimes fairly, sometimes not so much) and without preset bias toward guys like Jarrett, you'll probably enjoy a lot of it. Even the bad ppvs have some good wrestling and there are some really good nights in there. But you're going to be scratching your head plenty and probably get outright pissed a few times as well. Good luck.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 23:30 |
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Re-watching TNA can get really bad but I can never get when people pretend that it has never been worse in the WWE. You just now look fondly at the times when Mae Young gave birth to a hand or Shawn Michaels vacates the WWF World Title because he lost his smile. Bad becomes nostalgia when the WWE is concerned. TNA just stays negative in the eyes of WWE fans.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 23:31 |
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This thread is going to own and I love you for it.
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| # ? Jan 5, 2013 23:35 |
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Paper Jam Dipper posted:Re-watching TNA can get really bad but I can never get when people pretend that it has never been worse in the WWE. You just now look fondly at the times when Mae Young gave birth to a hand or Shawn Michaels vacates the WWF World Title because he lost his smile. Bad becomes nostalgia when the WWE is concerned. TNA just stays negative in the eyes of WWE fans. No one is nostalgic for Shawn losing his smile. At best people say "Shawn sure was a prick before he found Christ." And TNA just stays negative? Have you missed how so many people say "TNA sure was good in 2005."
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| # ? Jan 6, 2013 00:09 |
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This is going to be beautiful. I love watching a person's hope and innocence slowly crumble and deteriorate. Victory Road 2011 is going to be fun.
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| # ? Jan 6, 2013 00:13 |
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MassRayPer posted:No one is nostalgic for Shawn losing his smile. At best people say "Shawn sure was a prick before he found Christ." And TNA just stays negative? Have you missed how so many people say "TNA sure was good in 2005." TNA in 2005-2006 was loving awesome(Not perfect thought. It did have it's share of problems). I would say it was better that the WWE in 2006 (Although that may be by default because WWE in 2006 was legendarily bad, top to bottom). Things didn't truly go to poo poo in TNA until Vince Russo came along. I may be the person on these forums that hates TNA the most because I saw what Could Have Been Great. BigRed0427 fucked around with this message at Jan 6, 2013 around 00:21 |
| # ? Jan 6, 2013 00:14 |
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VICTORY ROAD - November 7th 2004 PART 2 2. Kid Kash, Dallas, and The Naturals vs Ron Killings, Eric Watts, Johnny B. Badd, and Pat Kenney To me this just seems like Kid Kash and his posse of equally hairy friends vs R-Truth, Marc Mero, and their bodyguards. It's hardly exhilarating stuff. Kid Kash tries to get me emotionally invested by pulling out all the old school heel tricks. He bullies the backstage interviewer, he bigs himself up, he even snatches a sign from a fan and rips it up! Somebody get the stunt granny! Really he just comes across more as a petty bastard than a supervillain. I do get quite angry when he pokes Mero in the eye though. Always had a soft spot for Marc. The two big men, Dallas and Watts, enter the ring after some slick exchanges from the smaller guys. Dallas genuinely has a tramp-stamp tattoo on his lower back; you can see it peeking out from his tights. Disgraceful. The big guys take turns slamming one another, before taking out a few smaller members of both teams with everybody's favourite hoss move: the big boot. Then...WHAT THE gently caress!? Dallas goes up for a moonsault!? It misses, but it's not bad. Not as pretty as Garza's, but definitely a few leagues ahead of Lita. Killings is in now and clearing house. I've always been a fan of his agility and style, but always favoured his heel run to anything he did as a babyface (not the most unique of opinions, I know). Sadly it looks like he's in smiling/dancing mode here. It all breaks down as most wrestlers find themselves brawling on the outside, which leaves a Natural alone in the ring with Mero and Killings. Marc hits a textbook frankensteiner, and The Truth follows up with...essentially a Pedigree for the win? Alright then. Winners: Ron Killings, Eric Watts, Johnny B. Badd, and Pat Kenney 1.5/5. Meh. Nothing awful, but this is hardly PPV material. Short and unspectacular. At least the match didn't pretend to be anything it wasn't: a platform for Killings to get over. Shane Douglas is in the parking lot again.  Another limo pulls up and Shane JUST CAN'T WAIT TO SEE WHO'S INSIDE! So excited. Except he can't, because a very large, very inarticulate heavy stands in his way. Jesus Chris, Shane, what happened to you? The bodyguard refuses him access...AND SHANE GETS IN HIS FACE! I love it! I'm making that the opening of this post. Suddenly we cut to "The Monster" Abyss all chained up inside a dark room. And he seems legitimately loving terrifying. I'm successfully hyped for his match later.3. Piratita Morgan vs Mascarita Sagrada ...and now we have two Mexican midgets. They do some lucha stuff for a while, then the ref takes a sort of half-bump which has no effect on the outcome of the match, and then the face rolls up the heel for the three count. What on earth was the point of that? Winner: Mascarita Sagrada DUD/5. Short (pun intended) and pointless. No botches or anything, but I'm just quite baffled. Scott Hall makes his way to the ring "Now you know you can't throw a party without inviting Scott Hall" he says. Personally I think that slogan is just a recipe for disaster. He tells us that Kevin Nash definitely DEFNITELY isn't here, which Jarrett also assured us earlier in the show. Hmm. Usually I'd call bullshit, but maybe he knew there'd be actual midgets on the card and couldn't bear to associate himself with it. 4. NWA World Tag Team Championship: Team Canada (c) vs 3 Live Kru The 3 Live Kru consist of Killings and Konnan, who completely pull off the gimmick and B. G. James (Road Dogg),who completely does not. It'll be the latter two challenging for the titles. Team Canada is Eric Young and BOBBY ROO', backed up by their manager Coach D'amore, who seems so obnoxious that I love him already. James gives Roode the DX crotch chop (is he allowed to do that?) and earns a smack in the mouth for his troubles. He's soon back into the match, however, giving Team Canada the runaround. For tag team champs, these guys are goofy as hell. B. G James plays face-in-peril but neither Canadian can put him away. YAY Coach D'amore gets involved, sliding a Canadian flag to his boys. HILARITY ENSUES as their efforts to clothesline James with the flag ends with both teammates clonking heads with one another. Japes! Konnan gets the lukewarm tag but nothing substantial comes of it. Eventually we're left with James setting Roode up for the pumphandle slam, only for D'amore to slide in to break it up. Killings slides in from the opposite side and completely scares the poo poo out of D'amore, chasing him to the back. Roode floors James with a cheap shot from behind, but Konnan is in to spike him with a facebuster (or "K-Factor" for the win. New champions! Winners and NEW NWA World Tag Team Champions: 3 Live Kru 2/5 - A nice feel-good win here. Good psychology, decent action, and Team Canada are pretty good at heeling it up. All I'll say is that Road Dogg needs to get the gently caress away from this gimmick. As charismatic as he is, it doesn't stop it from being really quite laughable. Not in a good way. We cut to Raven in a similar dark area to Abyss. It turns out all three men (Monty Brown being the third) competing in the "Monster's Ball" match later are spending 24 hours in a locked room with no light, water, or food. Interesting stipulation or utterly pointless? We'll see if it affects the match at all. Anyway, Raven does some poetry. It's intense as usual. For no reason, none other than Roddy Piper and Jimmy Snuka are in the ring. Okay... Piper pays respect to Snuka and offers a free-shot so they can even the scores. He is referring of course to the infamous Piper's Pit segment in which Roddy cracked Snuka over the head with a coconut. Because he's from Fiji, you see? Kid Kash comes out to liven up the party and insults Superfly, who grabs him by the throat. The Naturals come in to beat on Snuka, and are doing pretty well until Sonjay Dutt evens the score. It strikes me how very little I careabout all of this. Kash grabs a coconut from somwhere and lays out Dutt with it. Everybody sells it like death. Kash and the heels bail while Piper is incensed. The commentary team muse over whether Dutt is actually, genuinely, literally dead. There wasn't enough collective charisma in the ring for that to really work. Not even Hotrod could save it. While Abyss got menacing silence and Raven did his dark poetry thing, Monty Brown gets an angry black man promo. It's nothing unique, but I am looking forward to this one. 5. Open Challenge: Trinity vs ??? Trinity comes out with Disco Inferno and some other guy, and talks about how awesome she is. The guys hoist her up and parade her around the ring...until none other than Jacqueline comes out to spoil their fun! Holy poo poo, nostalgia time. Jacqueline bosses the first minute, Trinity comes back in the second thanks to interference from the guy who isn't Disco. She then hits the THIRD (and easily the worst) moonsault of the night to put away the ex-Diva. Winner: Trinity 0.5/5 - Too short to mean anything at all, but Jacqueline's opening assault was frantic and fun. The nostalgia factor helped it a lot. 6. Monster's Ball Match: Abyss vs Raven vs Monty Brown Each competitor comes out selling the effects of their 24 hour lockdown...by squinting and shielding their faces from the light. Monty Brown looks a little bit like he's about to cry. Abyss dominates the early goings, battering both opponents with a trash can (which he found in the crowd?). He and Raven brawl into the stands, and the poor ex-ECW man is slammed onto the arena steps. That looked horrible. We quickly cut to a hooded man watching the action from the rafters. Maybe it's Sting! Back in the ring now, none of the three are tearing into one another with the kind of hatred you'd expect from the stipulation. They just kind of brawl messily with an occasional weapon shot thrown in. Monty hurls a chair Abyss and he goes down. A quick tip for Abyss; if you're trying to be a wannabe Kane, NEVER go down after just one chairshot. Don't stand for any of this Sabu-style throwing either. Punch that poo poo back in their face. Action picks up when Monty tries to hit Raven with The Pounce (or "THE POUNCE!!!" according to the TNA commentary team), but accidentally hits the ref instead. It looks pretty brutal; the guy gets folded up like cardboard. No way does it deserve the "holy poo poo" chant it receives though, sorry Monty. Brown hoists Abyss into the air and slams him down. For all his undeniable strength, Monty really isn't too sharp in the ring. Still capable of lifting some huge dudes though. Abyss strikes back with his finisher but the ref's still unconscious. For a gigantic masked beast, Abyss is pretty good at inspiring sympathy. I kind of want to run in and count the pin for the poor guy. Abyss retrieves a bag from under the ring and it's FULL OF THUMBTACKS! Jesus. Is he Kane or Mankind? This could get incredibly nasty. Brown and Abyss tussle on the top rope over who eats the tacks, only for Raven to come in and settle matters by powerbombing KaneKind right into them. Oh god they're all in his arms and there's blood, real blood. It's not as bad as when it happened to Orton or Foley, but I'd completely forgotten how powerful a spot that was. He kicks out of the ensuing pinfall and I totally buy it, because the dude is huge. Raven pushes Abyss off the apron through a table, and BROWN SMASHES HIM INTO A SECOND TABLE SET UP IN THE CORNER. The pinfall is academic. Raven's gone. Winner: Monty Brown 2.5/5 - Hardly a technical masterpiece, but it was entertaining enough and that finish was explosive. Bonus points for thumbtacks as well. Monty got the win here, but I'm honestly more intrigued by Abyss. He's a far better brawler and has a more interesting gimmick. Fittingly, this part ends with Shane Douglas still in the parking lot, continuing to furiously attempt to see who's in the limo. Has he been out there for the past four matches? That's dedication. Somebody's due a promotion. JGKing fucked around with this message at Jan 6, 2013 around 02:25 |
| # ? Jan 6, 2013 02:17 |
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The first law of TNA booking, if there can be a ref bump, there must be a ref bump.
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| # ? Jan 6, 2013 02:40 |
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njsykora posted:The first law of TNA booking, if there can be a ref bump, there must be a ref bump. Second Law: If there shouldn't be a ref bump, there will be a ref bump.
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| # ? Jan 6, 2013 02:44 |
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Isn't this around the time that Shane Douglas was really bad problems with the painkillers? So that might explain what was wrong with Shane, well that and he is an enormous douchebag.
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| # ? Jan 6, 2013 04:01 |
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lets do this in synchtube. Some of the first TNA ppvs are totally harmful to wrestling fans.
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| # ? Jan 6, 2013 04:15 |
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coconono posted:lets do this in synchtube. Some of the first TNA ppvs are totally harmful to wrestling fans. I'd be down! What's the link?
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| # ? Jan 6, 2013 04:31 |
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quote:The commentary team muse over whether Dutt is actually, genuinely, literally dead. gently caress now I want to hear this. And I would totally watch some TNA PPVs.
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| # ? Jan 6, 2013 04:57 |
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MassRayPer posted:...then from there the quality nosedives until summer of 05. The second half of 2005 is very good... Funny you should mention that, I just caught the Liger vs Samoa Joe match from the 2005 Bound For Glory and was wondering if TNA was actually good then or if that was just some weird blip. Beside the fact that both guys are obviously great, what stuck out a me was how hot the crowd was, which is in stark contrast to the terrible crowds I've seen on the few occasions I've tried to give them a chance. if they were putting on quality shows to an enthusiastic crowd then, what the hell happened to them shortly afterwards?
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| # ? Jan 6, 2013 05:33 |
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Thauros posted:Funny you should mention that, I just caught the Liger vs Samoa Joe match from the 2005 Bound For Glory and was wondering if TNA was actually good then or if that was just some weird blip.
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| # ? Jan 6, 2013 06:20 |
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VICTORY ROAD - November 7th 2004 PART 3 X Division champ Petey Williams is backstage with Coach D'amore, looks like he's a member of Team Canada as well. D'amore says that if AJ Styles beats Williams for the belt, he's gone from TNA forever. NOOOOOOO! We then get a short video package hyping the match and GOOD LORD that is a ridiculous finishing move. I realise that a lot of suspension of disbelief is required to watch wrestling, but Williams' opponent literally backflips for him. Some clips of Styles are shown as well and, quite simply, the man can fly. This is set to be a good match.7. TNA X Division Championship: Petey Williams (c) vs AJ Styles AJ comes out wearing a ridiculous sleeveless hood thing. The two start out with a prolonged exchange of mat-wrestling and near-falls. The wrestling nerds in the crowd all jizz simultaneously as they return to their feet and face off. It seemed really really good, but I think that may just be in contrast to the rest of the show so far. THAT WAS SPECIAL though. AJ hits one of the most beautiful dropkicks I've ever seen. Jesus. Now he hits a perfect suicide dive into a ludicrously small ringside area. If I was in the front row I'd definitely have flinched. Williams regains control and drapes Styles over the middle rope. IS HE GOING FOR THE 619!? No, Coach D'amore just socks AJ in the face from the outside. Hahaha that was beautiful. Dueling "let's go Petey" "let's go AJ" chants now, and the Styles chants are noticeably more high pitched. AJ gets control back out of absolutely nowhere with a pele kick and I'm genuinely enjoying myself. Both men tease their finishers until AJ settles matters by launching Petey into the turnbuckles. For all the fancy spots in this match, there's still a pretty hard-hitting edge to it. Lovely stuff. OH AND IT ALL GETS loving RUINED. That was stupid as hell. The ref tells D'amore to get off the apron, breaks off the conversation to count 2 for Styles...and then BREAKS OFF HIS OWN PINFALL TO CONTINUE SCOLDING D'AMORE!? I get the idea, but it's executed so very poorly. Williams goes to nail AJ with a hockey stick (the most foreign of objects) only for the ref to wrestle it away. Then as the ref throws the stick out, Petey nails Styles with the title belt! 1....2....AJ KICKS OUT! Haah I totally bought that as the finish. Both guys up to the top rope, Williams pushes AJ off, follows him down and hits the Canadian Destroyer out of nowhere! Alright, as ridiculous as the move looks, that was very smoothly executed. 1, 2, 3. Winner and STILL TNA X Division Champion: Petey Williams 3/5 - Very fun match, let down slightly by the one stupid ref moment. Both guys are excellent in the ring, and Styles in particular looks really special. Match of the night so far, easily. Jeff Jarrett is backstage looking confident as Scott Hall looks on. That was a tiny bit homoerotic. Hardy is shown applying facepaint and screaming into a mirror. You do what you do, Jeff. Next is a video package for the upcoming Last Man Standing Tag Match between America's Most Wanted (Chris Harris & James Storm) and Triple X (Chris Daniels & Elix Skipper). It's billed as a clash between the two top teams in TNA which only leaves me asking: why do neither of them hold the tag titles!? Instead we've got Konnan and Road Dogg dancing around like lovable bastards. They're the real top team. 8. Last Man Standing Tag Match: Triple X vs America's Most Wanted Daniels and Skipper come out in ridiculous sleeveless trench-coats. Is stupid hooded entrance attire a staple of TNA? AJ rocked his awful hoodie only a few minutes ago. Daniels jumps Storm at the bell, but Harris doesn't help him. He's too busy removing his entrance robe, obviously. A pretty wild brawl breaks out until Storm decides "enough of the bullshit" and beheads Daniels with a loving nice superkick. Some rabid bitch in the crowd is screaming for everything AMW do. Please shut up. Skipper sacrifices himself to save Daniels from AMW's double-team finishing move. That's love right there. Nice spot. Daniels gets drilled with some kind of slam and pinned, before the referee starts to count to 10. Okay so this isn't Last Man Standing, it's Texas Death Match. Why didn't they say so!? Triple X take control and hit Harris with a "powerplex", a nice looking double-team thing. Storm gets the hot tag and cleans house in a very Triple H fashion, with a few knees and slams and clotheslines. I begin to think the similarities are uncanny until he launches into a nice hurricanrana and drops Daniels. Yeah try one of those, Hunter. Storm sets up for that nice superkick again, but Daniels brutally kicks away his knee (injured in a previous Triple X attack apparently). "Sweep the leg" levels of mercilessness there. OH and it gets stepped up a notch, as Skipper distracts the ref, leaving Daniels free to demolish Storm's knee with a huge chairshot. That looked sick. Storm can't answer the 10-count and is out. Daniels is on a roll and sets up Harris for the "BEST...MOONSAULT...EVER!". Okay, points deducted for shouting out the move you're about to do. Like a Digimon. He misses it anyway. Harris goes up top now and crushes Daniels with a guillotine legdrop. 3-count, 10-count, we're down to Skipper and Harris (the two who've impressed me least in the match so far). The two go at it, and it's very slow and sloppy. A few boos and "boring" chants from the crowd. Brutal. Skipper grabs a chair, the ref warns him not to use it, but he tries to anyway!? Harris ducks, the chair ends up on the canvas, and Harris picks up Elix and slams him down onto the chair! Okay, so that's allowed? Yup, the ref is fine with that. I'm so confused. Skipper kicks out at two, but the ref counts the pinfall anyway? UGH! So bad. Skipper can't get up before 10 and that's the ballgame. Winners: America's Most Wanted 1/5 - Started off very promisingly. Daniels and Storm know what they're doing, but Harris and Skipper just hosed everything up in the latter half of the match. The finish was pretty botched too. The Texas Death Match thing really sapped the match of any tension too, as the whole pinfall + 10-count thing just came across as overly drawn-out. It looks like Daniels is pissed that the match quality went downhill once he and Storm were out of there. Right on, buddy. Chairshots for AMW. Now he and Skipper handcuff Harris and Storm together. More chairshots. It makes Triple X look fairly dangerous...at least until security (led by Don Harris!) come out and easily escort them to the back, with minimal protest from either man. Talk about killing heat. One short, standard Jarrett interview later, and we're back in the arena. Somebody let Mike Tenay in the ring, OH GOD! He's here to announce the new TNA "Director of Authority", a vote which apparently took place on their website between Dusty Rhodes and Vince Russo. I'm guessing that's like commissioner. Dusty wins and he's out to cut a promo. Oh crap, I don't have the energy for this. It's basically just a pro-TNA promo, which I guess is allowed, considering this is their first monthly PPV. Video package now for the Jarrett/Hardy feud and upcoming ladder match. Jarrett warns Hardy that Nash isn't to be trusted. That's fair. Hardy's weak promo skills are showcased; "Planet Jarrett, a small asteroid in Universe Hardy." Ugh. Can it get worse? OH yes it can. "Hardy goes up...Jarrett goes down!". Poor. AHAHA. Jarrett says potentially the best thing I've ever heard him say as he calls Hardy the "neon space cadet". That's brilliant! We see Jarrett jumping Hardy in his hotel suite, and Hardy getting his own back in the ring later the same night. Tenay mentions that Hardy is in search of his first major world title, which I completely forgot about. Interesting. The package ends with Hall and Nash making some pretty ominous (but vague) threats. I'm guessing this'll lead to a Nash heel turn on Hardy, but surely that's far too obvious. Right? RIGHT!? 9. NWA World Heavyweight Championship Ladder Match: Jeff Jarrett (c) vs Jeff Hardy Hardy is out to his self-sung TNA theme "Modest" which sadly I have heard before, and never want to hear again. It is desperately bad. Jarrett's out with his guitar and I'm not sure who to root for. I've always hated Jarrett, but that "neon space cowboy" line was amazing. Plus, I was a huge Hardy Boyz mark as a kid, but now I really really dislike the guy. Let's just see what happens. Super-special ring announcing as Hardy and Jarrett are unconvincingly held back from one another, which really just distracts from the whole spectacle. "The Charismatic Enigma" is a nickname I fully disagree with. It reeks of something Hardy came up with himself. Then again, the same can be said for "King of the Mountain". Messy brawling to begin with. Jarrett whipped into some ladders. Now Jarrett is sandwiched between the two legs of the ladder and repeatedly crushed. All Hardy at the moment. Now the ladder is turned upside down and Hardy stands on Jarrett's back, crushing him with either side of the ladder. This is like ladder-torture-porn or something, and it's pretty drawn-out and weird. SOMEBODY JUMP OFF SOMETHING HIGH. More sloppy brawling. FINALLY HARDY JUMPS OFF SOMETHING HIGH, crashes and burns. Now it's Jarrett's turn to beat Hardy around with the ladder. Not the most compelling of matches so far. He smacks him around the outside area, and various female Hardy fans in the front row are incredibly pissed off. N'awww, Jarrett has some of Hardy's green paint in his hair and it looks ADORABLE. Jarrett goes for the belt, but Hardy's up on a separate ladder and dropkicks him off. It sounds impressive but it wasn't. Swanton Bomb onto Jarrett who's lying on a ladder. For an agile man, Hardy is slow as gently caress moving around the ring. Scott Hall jogs slowly down to the ring, looking very much like he just escaped an asylum. Sloppy Razor's Edge to Hardy. Security come in for the second time this evening, and just allow Hall to take a seat at the bottom of the ramp. Okay... Hardy recovers though, and sets up a contraption with the ladders. I'm not sure what he's going for....OH! It's the same sort of spot that absolutely ruined Joey Mercury's face! The first actually impressive looking thing in this match so far. Both men climb one side of the ladder, and Hardy sloppily bulldogs/DDTs/facebusters Jarrett to the canvas. Ugly. Hall pulls Hardy out of the ring and tries to start a fight, but after a few punches Hardy decides "gently caress that", ignores him, and goes straight back into the ring. Poor Scott Hardy shoves Jarrett off a ladder into the ropes, and it looks dangerous as hell.  He's lucky he didn't break a leg. Now it's Hardy's turn to get shoved off, right onto poor Scotty on the outside. Hardy beats up Hall for a little bit, which just looks sad. In a rare impressive spot, he sets up a chair in the ring and uses it as a platform to suicide dive onto Jarrett and Hall outside. It's pretty nice, but I've seen about 20 guys in this show alone who could have done it better. Now Hardy gets a huge ladder from under the ring, and he and Jarrett climb it on the outside for no reason. They exchange a few punches and it topples over....right onto Scott Hall! The poor guy has taken more bumps than the loving wrestlers in this match! Now the two Jeffs climb a ladder in the actual ring (like, in order to actually get to the belt this time) and Hardy kicks Jarrett directly in the balls. He tries to sunset flip/powerbomb Jarrett over the top of the ladder and it is HORRIBLY HORRIBLY BOTCHED. Both men and the ladder end up in a heap as Don West and Mike Tenay try to somehow justify what just happened. OH BRILLIANT. They repeat the spot on the ring apron, and botch it again. Stop already! Tenay passes it off as Jarrett "blocking the powerbomb attempt". Hall into the ring and Hardy hits the worst-sold twist of fate I've ever seen. The following Swanton Bomb is better. Jarrett regains control with a simple chairshot to the back. Classic. He climbs the ladder and could pretty much pull the title down and win, but KEVIN NASH'S MUSIC PLAYS! Shock time. In fact, Jarrett's so in shock he forgets he could literally pull down the belt and win as Nash saunters SO LAZILY to the ring with a guitar over each shoulder. Nash is in the ring now, and he and Hall execute the SLOWEST loving SWERVE EVER as he lazily hands a guitar to Hall, who lazily takes it, and lazily smashes Hardy in the back with it. Nash follows up with a lazy shot of his own, and only Jarrett's guitar lands with any real impact. Hardy's out, Jarrett takes the belt, and that was awful. Kill me. Winner and STILL NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett DUD/5 - Let's list the things wrong with this match. 1) Sloppy brawling in general. 2) Those two botched powerbombs. 3) Lack of good psychology from both men. They just trundled from one spot to the next with no real urgency or storytelling. 4) The pointless, useless, stupid, ineffective interfering from Hall. 5) The booking. I could tell this swerve was going to happen from the moment they announced Nash wasn't in the building. The only surprise was that they actually went through with it despite it being so obvious. 6) The way the swerve was executed. Just no motivation from Hall or Nash to make this look good. They were far too concerned with making themselves look cool. The expression Nash wore as he sauntered to the ring was one of the most punchable faces I've ever seen. Oh gently caress, Nash has a mic. He makes a joke about Hardy being (painted) green in the match, and how it must be because earlier he was green (with envy) standing next to Nash at the urinal. Comedy gold. They issue an open challenge to the locker room and it's answered by....AJ Styles. Please AJ, you're the most impressive guy I've seen on this show, don't get involved with such an awful angle AJ does well at first but the numbers catch up to him. 3 Live Kru come to save him and are quickly defeated. Really quickly. Because The Outsiders are such tough guys, you see? Suddenly the mystery limo Shane Douglas was trying to break into opens, and a mystery figure strides towards the ring.....iiiiit's....MACHO MAN RANDY SAVAGE! Oh wow! Business is about to pick the gently caress up! He marches down to the ring aaaaand....is held back by security. And the show ends. That's it? Are you k- 
JGKing fucked around with this message at May 18, 2013 around 14:27 |
| # ? Jan 6, 2013 19:19 |
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This entire thread owns bones so far, I lost my poo poo at "SLOWEST loving SWERVE EVER". Oh, and be prepared to love Don West, just because he can make anything sound amazing through sheer enthusiasm.
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| # ? Jan 6, 2013 19:26 |
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We have just witnessed a man's reaction to seeing the Canadian Destroyer for the first time.
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| # ? Jan 6, 2013 19:54 |
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VogeGandire posted:This entire thread owns bones so far, I lost my poo poo at "SLOWEST loving SWERVE EVER". You know-it-alls are just angry because you didn't see it coming.
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| # ? Jan 6, 2013 20:16 |
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The Canadian Destroyer is the best worst wrestling move of all time, I will not hear any disrespect of it  Also I like how I was able to know who was going to be good at where purely based on the names because I'm looking in the future. I wonder how much of it was obvious back then who was good and who was bad
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| # ? Jan 6, 2013 20:56 |
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I read this as "weekly" initially, which lead me to be very concerned.
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| # ? Jan 6, 2013 21:11 |
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Love the thread already. Don't know if you actually want a little context or if you intend to watch totally clueless as to what happens between PPVs. If so just ignored what follows.JGKing posted:Next is a video package for the upcoming Last Man Standing Tag Match between America's Most Wanted (Chris Harris & James Storm) and Triple X (Chris Daniels & Elix Skipper). It's billed as a clash between the two top teams in TNA which only leaves me asking: why do neither of them hold the tag titles!? Instead we've got Konnan and Road Dogg dancing around like lovable bastards. They're the real top team. Also for whatever its worth Jeff Jarrett's "King of the Mountain" nickname was taken from him winning a match actually named "King of the Mountain." But the match sucked and you'll have to watch some of those soon, so sorry.
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| # ? Jan 6, 2013 21:15 |
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| # ? May 22, 2013 05:56 |
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Jefferoo posted:I'd be down! What's the link? we can use mine: synchtube.com/coconono just let me know who is who on synchtube so I can get some extra moderators assigned.
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| # ? Jan 6, 2013 21:31 |
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