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Our love had always been taboo, and has caused a lot of trouble for me personally. My mom to this day still thinks I'm a necrophiliac because she doesn't understand the difference between dead and undead, and my dad has never trusted my girlfriend. Still, it was manageable up until recently. It all started three days ago when her and I visited for dinner, seeing as she can't go out during the day. We all had some awkward conversation in the living room once we got there, and then father pulled me aside to tell me, "Son, I know you like this girl, but she's nothing but a rotten bloodsucker. If so much as breaths on your neck, you stab her in the heart, you hear?" I told him that everything was fine and advised him to be more open-minded and progressive. He nodded, but his grumbling as we returned to living room told me that he wasn't going to make an effort at it. Pretty soon, we are having dinner and no one is talking. My parents and I were having meatloaf while my girlfriend helped herself to a fair amount of wine seeing as there was no proper form of sustenance for her there (once again, my parents are not thoughtful in this scenario.) Anyway, dinner goes by pretty fast and we get out of there quick as possible. I have to drive home because my girlfriend is very drunk by this point. Perhaps if she had more blood of her own it wouldn't be so easy for her to get smashed. Once we get home, I have to help her into our apartment and to our bed; afterward we fell asleep pretty fast. Later in the night I was suddenly awoken by a sharp pain in my neck. My eyes bugged open and there was my girlfriend hunched over me, drinking my blood from my neck. The entirety of my body was cold and immobile, making me a helpless victim to her thirst. Through the pain and blood-loss it was difficult to focus, but when her jaws released me I had enough energy in me to say, "We are talking about this in the morning." Then I passed out. We did discuss it, and got into a pretty big fight. I accused her of drinking to much; she told me that I was provoking her by not wearing my evening turtleneck. Then we got into how much I hate the turtleneck, which was really ugly. Our screaming fit lasted for an hour until I told her I needed to be alone and think for awhile. So, I went to my parents house and explained everything to them. My dad couldn't shut up about being right and my mother just kept on crying. Now I'm here, three days later, and I'm starting to grow fangs. I feel like my trust and personal boundaries have been violated, and I'm becoming really sensitive to sunlight as well. I was waiting to turn when we were ready to settle down, but now things are going way too fast. To make matters worse my father has recently purchased a crossbow and is making stakes in his workshop. I don't know if he's planning on slaying me, my girlfriend, or the both of us. Is there a way to cure vampirism? Or should I try to accept this change in my life and forgive my girlfriend? What should I do? Tea Party Crasher fucked around with this message at Feb 5, 2013 around 17:22 |
| # ? Feb 4, 2013 03:54 |
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| # ? May 25, 2013 02:19 |
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I agree w/this, also I have JFK in my head.
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| # ? Feb 4, 2013 04:19 |
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Tea Party Crasher posted:Is there a way to cure vampirism? Hello Tea Party i am sorry to hear about your vampireism. I looked onto youtube and found something that might help apparently it was uploaded by a fellow sufferer. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dtzBFLm32x4 I have never been or seen a vampires so I can't help but it sounds pretty bad, most videos mention an oblivion or a sky rim (seeing the edge of reality, or an inescapable void?) I hope you can get some help good luck and stay healthy and well !
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| # ? Feb 4, 2013 07:24 |
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Grind up garlic cloves and holy water (a 1:1 ratio) and rub it into your scalp every five hours. After about a day the fangs should start to recede. Keep checking in the mirror to make sure it doesn't progress further. If it does, you're kind of screwed. In the future, try to find some black pudding in your local grocery store. It's a good source of blood for those who need it. Alternatively, go to a pet store, they sell live mice for use as snake food. It's not nearly as satisfying but it'll keep you or your girlfriend from having this sort of situation again.
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| # ? Feb 4, 2013 08:54 |
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Do you know who turned her? Sometimes you can nip this in the butt by slaying the master vampire.
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| # ? Feb 4, 2013 15:40 |
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Oh, sure, but when a MALE vampire turns a WOMAN without consent, THAT's vampire-surprise sex.  Just another example of how feminazi-driven mainstream misandry only works to benefit the undead who are also lucky enough to have a vagina.
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| # ? Feb 4, 2013 17:02 |
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Portals posted:Grind up garlic cloves and holy water (a 1:1 ratio) and rub it into your scalp every five hours. After about a day the fangs should start to recede. Keep checking in the mirror to make sure it doesn't progress further. If it does, you're kind of screwed. Thanks for the advice, though the treatment really burns. I think I screwed up the measurments and put in too much holy water. It was a good thing there was a fire extingusher nearby. I'll keep it up for now and see if I get any results. As for the food suggestions, I'd reall appreciate if people chipped in some nice recipes. Just because she's a vampire doesn't mean she can't enjoy a little variety. Tonsured posted:Do you know who turned her? Sometimes you can nip this in the butt by slaying the master vampire. This was my father's suggestion as well. By accident I informed him that she was turned by the organizer of her book club, and he's out on the hunt tonight. I feel really guilty about this because this is going to take away one of her favorite social activities. This could cure us both, though, so it could be benifical in the long term. HappyKitty posted:Oh, sure, but when a MALE vampire turns a WOMAN without consent, THAT's vampire-surprise sex. Whoa, let's not make this about vampire surprise sex. I just want to work this out between her and I and not get the authorities involved. I still love her very much, even though I am a little upset. This is just a rough patch that we need to get through by slaying.
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| # ? Feb 4, 2013 17:17 |
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Same thing happened to me, OP. Just go with it, trust me. Mortality is highly overrated. Move to a big city, and you'll never miss the day. Don't even have to worry about muggers. You can smoke all you want, too; vampires don't get cancer (AIDS can be a problem though).
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| # ? Feb 4, 2013 17:31 |
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Tea Party Crasher posted:Thanks for the advice, though the treatment really burns. I think I screwed up the measurments and put in too much holy water. It was a good thing there was a fire extingusher nearby. I'll keep it up for now and see if I get any results. For lots of people, the first outbreak is the worst. Keep in mind you have to tell all your future partners about this if you choose to split with your girlfriend, even if you're not showing symptoms at the time. You might get outbreaks a few times a year too. All and all, a lot more people suffer from the vamp then you'd think, so there's no need to feel like a pariah. J Corp fucked around with this message at Feb 4, 2013 around 18:58 |
| # ? Feb 4, 2013 18:55 |
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Lumberjack Bonanza posted:Same thing happened to me, OP. Just go with it, trust me. Mortality is highly overrated. Move to a big city, and you'll never miss the day. Don't even have to worry about muggers. You can smoke all you want, too; vampires don't get cancer (AIDS can be a problem though). If the hunt doesn't turn out, I'll probably go with this. Do you suggest putting in the effort to get an apartment, or should I just try and find a cool abandonded warehouse? I've always felt a bit cramped where I currently live and a change of scenary could help change my attitude and identity entirely. What are some cool vampire nicknames? I'm thinking "Dalv" right now. Also the smoking may distract from my unholy, unquenchable thirst. I'll do it while wearing sunglasses to, just because. J Corp posted:For lots of people, the first outbreak is the worst. Keep in mind you have to tell all your future partners about this if you choose to split with your girlfriend, even if you're not showing symptoms at the time. You might get outbreaks a few times a year too. All and all, a lot more people suffer from the vamp then you'd think, so there's no need to feel like a pariah. Thanks, you all are really helping me feel less like a monster. I do hope that my girlfriend and I can stay together, but if not I think I'll continue to date other vampires so I don't complicate some other mortal's life. I'm not the "lure impressionable young girls back to my warehouse with otherworldy charm and feed on them" kind of guy, I'm more genuinly romantic than that.
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| # ? Feb 4, 2013 19:29 |
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dude, you broke the first rule, don't stick your dick in undead. At least you're man enough, now that you've made your coffin, that you're prepared to lie in it. Just don't expect the chicks to be any more rational now that you're exclusive to vamps. hope you enjoy drama.
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| # ? Feb 4, 2013 20:48 |
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My dad went on the hunt and now it's brought along a bunch of problems in it's wake. Apparently the book club was meeting today, and he barged in while they were having some cheese and wine. As he puts it, "Every one of them was screamin', but I managed to get that blood-sucking master vamp right in the heart." He then told me he was disappointed when she did not turn to dust, but was able to make up for it by cutting off her head and bringing it home with him as a trophy. Now he is just looking at it where it sits above the fireplace and laughs to himself occasionally. Absolutely tasteless. The slightest comfort he gave to me was when he told me that my girlfriend was unharmed, and had fled the scene before he could 'consider offin' her.' Knowing this I attempted to call her but I kept getting forwarded to her voice-mail. I think she knows what I had told my father. She's claimed to have a mental lock on thoughts, but I doubt that because I'm pretty sure she would have called and apologized by now if she knew how I've been feeling for the past few days. Maybe she's just intimately clueless. Meanwhile, I don't see any signs of my fangs receding. It's possible that the vampire my father killed wasn't even the master, making this all for nothing. At this point I don't really care if my girlfriend leaves me anymore, I just want to wash my hands of this whole situation. Perhaps if I went out and bought those cool sunglasses I mentioned earlier I'd feel better.
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| # ? Feb 5, 2013 02:51 |
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If I were still young and foolish I would astral project to your location and just blanket half your with a psionic field and lock that poo poo down for you. Unfortunately the last time I engaged in mental combat with a vampire the results were less than thrilling. I took him out with more than a little effort but the strain proved to be too much. There were these residual memories--his voice. It was was still in me. Talking, thinking, distracting. It culminated into a huge mental breakdown where I found myself a cave cohabiting with bats. For three months I lived with them, as if I was one of them. I would even regurgitate blood to help nourish the hatchlings in the rookery. That poo poo was hosed yo and I'm not doing it again. So instead of wrecking myself I'll try and get in contact a ringer. The best vampire tracker in the western hemisphere he's a day walker- the one that famously dispatched Dracula's great grandson Scott Dracula. Maybe you read about that? I'm going to send him a dream tonight. If a four foot tall African American man shows up at your door do not be alarmed- that is the contact. There is more to him than meets the eye, his mother was bitten while he was still gestating now he's some sort of hybrid. His birth certificate reads Maxwell Hondo Sturt but he goes by the name Dirk- because he fancies himself a smaller Blade. Listen to everything he says and you will find the true master vampire. Edit: Just contacted Dirk he agreed to help and also informed me that bats don't hatch or have rookeries and the place that I was living in for three months probably didn't exist. Tonsured fucked around with this message at Feb 5, 2013 around 07:14 |
| # ? Feb 5, 2013 07:01 |
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Tea Party Crasher posted:I feel like my trust and personal boundaries have been violated, and I'm becoming really sensitive to sunlight as well. I was waiting to turn when we were ready to settle down, Dude. Sever sever sever. You do not want to spend immortality with a girlfriend that doesn't respect boundaries like that. You'll save yourself a lot of grief in the long run. I suggest you try dating a few other women and see what's out there - maybe a couple of nice werewolf chicks? Tea Party Crasher posted:Knowing this I attempted to call her but I kept getting forwarded to her voice-mail. I think she knows what I had told my father. She's claimed to have a mental lock on thoughts, but I doubt that because I'm pretty sure she would have called and apologized by now if she knew how I've been feeling for the past few days. Maybe she's just intimately clueless. You're just kidding yourself here. She's not clueless, she's avoiding you. The relationship was over as soon as she tore open your neck and drained your life-blood and she knows it.
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| # ? Feb 5, 2013 09:05 |
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Seeker Maya posted:Dude. Sever sever sever. Whoa. You do realize you're giving advice to a guy who is dating a vampire? Severing in this context could lead to more tasteless ornaments above the fireplace.
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| # ? Feb 5, 2013 10:06 |
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Sorry to hear about how the hunt turned out. I'd suggest bringing your dad's head to your girlfriend as an olive branch, but most people have a hang-up about patricide for their first couple decades as a vampire.Tea Party Crasher posted:If the hunt doesn't turn out, I'll probably go with this. Do you suggest putting in the effort to get an apartment, or should I just try and find a cool abandonded warehouse? I've always felt a bit cramped where I currently live and a change of scenary could help change my attitude and identity entirely. Abandoned warehouses are good for the vampire just starting out, but condemned houses are much more comfortable. If you run into any addicts squatting there, draining them is good for a buzz. Over the years you accumulate enough wealth to pretty much live wherever you want, though. Just don't go all Cullen about it; even a big, tacky castle is more fashionable than that poo poo. Ideally, you want the "v" in your nickname to be the second letter. I dunno who made the rule, but it works. Another good choice is names that invoke imagery of stabbings, like Lance. The best ones have become a bit cliche, unfortunately. Sunglasses are a must, as is a long leather jacket. Lumberjack Bonanza fucked around with this message at Feb 5, 2013 around 16:58 |
| # ? Feb 5, 2013 16:54 |
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Lumberjack Bonanza posted:Sorry to hear about how the hunt turned out. I'd suggest bringing your dad's head to your girlfriend as an olive branch, but most people have a hang-up about patricide for their first couple decades as a vampire. Lumberjack has some good points, here are a few others from my experiences. I find having access to surprisingly spacious sewers helps with making it in the city as a vampire. It allows you to move around town in the daytime, but keep some perfume around for the smell. I tend to try to blend in with society though, keep suspicion off me. So I have to forge a lot of ID's, get birth certificates from dead babies every 100 years or so. I suggest getting one with a cool name. You do NOT want to make the same mistake I did and go around as "Rupert Cox" for any length of time.
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| # ? Feb 5, 2013 17:08 |
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Seeker Maya posted:Dude. Sever sever sever. You do not want to spend immortality with a girlfriend that doesn't respect boundaries like that. You'll save yourself a lot of grief in the long run. I suggest you try dating a few other women and see what's out there - maybe a couple of nice werewolf chicks? I'm more of a cat-woman person. I dated this one werewolf girl in highschool and she was so needy. Whenever she was over at my house, and I'd have to leave the room to help my dad with an errand outside she would tear up all the furniture. I think she had a really low self esteem, because she always assumed she couldn't sit at the table to eat with us or lay on my bed with me. It was embaressing to watch her eat off the floor. Seeker Maya posted:You're just kidding yourself here. She's not clueless, she's avoiding you. The relationship was over as soon as she tore open your neck and drained your life-blood and she knows it. Your right, man. I bet she's just been manipulating me this whole time just so she could do this to me. I should've figured when she asked me what my blood type was before we became exclusive. Lumberjack Bonanza posted:Sorry to hear about how the hunt turned out. I'd suggest bringing your dad's head to your girlfriend as an olive branch, but most people have a hang-up about patricide for their first couple decades as a vampire. Maybe once I settle into my new brooding spot I could host a vampire goon meet? Could be fun, but it'd have to be a Bring Your Own Blood occassion, I think people would get suspicious if we all hunted together at once. Concerning a name, I'm thinking Voulge Zweihänder, a combo of my two favorite medieval weapons from when I was a kid. My dad would collect them and always let me train with them; he always thought I would be a hunter myself, which is kind of ironic now. I ordered some sunglasses on Amazon, because I don't want to go outside due to my hideous burned scalp quite yet, and leather jackets showed up in the "Customers Also Bought" section of the page. The internet is a great tool for vampires. I'll have to be selective about my hideout if I want to steal wifi. Tea Party Crasher fucked around with this message at Feb 5, 2013 around 20:31 |
| # ? Feb 5, 2013 17:30 |
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I know you're angry, but you need to realize that this is how most normal turnings happen. Don't buy into all that Hollywood bull with dark and romantic first turnings because in 99% of all cases they turn out awkward and clumsy like this.
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| # ? Feb 6, 2013 17:23 |
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So if you're not into her anymore, do you think I could get her number off you? I'll have to know what Clan she is first, though; I'm not very picky but I went out on a blind date not too long ago and she turned out to be a Nosferatu. She had a nice personality and all but I just want to get my stake wet, y'know?
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| # ? Feb 7, 2013 04:05 |
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I had a vampire girlfriend once, but I think she was just faking it. She showed up in mirrors and everything. And she worked retail. It's been a couple years and I still feel fine. Sever immediately.
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| # ? Feb 8, 2013 14:27 |
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kill her then yourself
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| # ? Feb 9, 2013 03:40 |
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Lonely Rolling Star posted:I had a vampire girlfriend once, but I think she was just faking it. She showed up in mirrors and everything. And she worked retail. It's been a couple years and I still feel fine. She may have been one of those psychic vampires. Have you had your aura checked?
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| # ? Feb 9, 2013 23:32 |
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Tea Party Crasher posted:I ordered some sunglasses on Amazon, because I don't want to go outside due to my hideous burned scalp quite yet, and leather jackets showed up in the "Customers Also Bought" section of the page. The internet is a great tool for vampires. I'll have to be selective about my hideout if I want to steal wifi. i here theres a big underground market 4 hudeouts that com with internet connectsion not that i would kno op but you could probibly ask some of the other posters here & have u considered joining som vamp fourms i hear there's a good resource for the newly innciated
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| # ? Feb 10, 2013 20:51 |
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Hello GBS
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| # ? Feb 10, 2013 20:56 |
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Tea Party Crasher posted:Our love had always been taboo, and has caused a lot of trouble for me personally. My mom to this day still thinks I'm a necrophiliac because she doesn't understand the difference between dead and undead, and my dad has never trusted my girlfriend. Still, it was manageable up until recently. G** FU**CKING DA** THATS A LONG POST
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| # ? Feb 10, 2013 20:57 |
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To the OP, if I was you I would just accept the vampirism. You won't see the light of day again or ever be able to comb your hair in the mirror again, but look at the bright side. You won't need to worry about growing old. Just be sure to get a good job at a blood bank, graveyard shift of course. This is to assume you don't get the mentally retarded sparkly strain of vampirism. If that is the case you might as well throw yourself into a pool of holy water for your own good. I heard of a love story with that strain and let me just say yours is better. EmGooser fucked around with this message at Feb 11, 2013 around 22:55 |
| # ? Feb 11, 2013 22:45 |
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This isn't E/N.
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| # ? Feb 12, 2013 00:05 |
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Does vampirism cure back acne? Anyone know? I don't have it, just wondering.
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| # ? Feb 12, 2013 02:23 |
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You have to join one of the vampire clans now, OP.
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| # ? Feb 12, 2013 04:18 |
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There is a thread somewhere that says you can make good money writing erotic gay vampire fiction. Imagine how much you can earn making erotic gay vampire fact. I would thank her.
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| # ? Feb 12, 2013 16:50 |
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Haven't heard from OP in a while. Anyone got his skype or something?
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| # ? Feb 12, 2013 21:32 |
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MantisToboggan posted:I just want to get my stake wet, y'know? There is nothing wet about vampire sex. It's like having consensual intercourse with a corpse. Not that I'd know what non-consensual intercourse with a corpse would be like.  I won't hand out her private information, but if you haven't had sex with a vampire before and plan to in the near future, buy as much lube as you can afford.Twat McTwatterson posted:kill her then yourself Dad, did you buy an account just to harass me? toggle posted:Does vampirism cure back acne? Anyone know? I don't have it, just wondering. It would be dumb to become a vampire just to get rid of back acne. Also, no. equity posted:You have to join one of the vampire clans now, OP. I'm already a member of a clan that I play Counterstrike with, would I get in trouble if I also affiliated with a vampire clan? jiggerypokery posted:There is a thread somewhere that says you can make good money writing erotic gay vampire fiction. Imagine how much you can earn making erotic gay vampire fact. I would thank her. "The Tale of Two Stakes" KrunkMcGrunk posted:Haven't heard from OP in a while. Anyone got his skype or something? Sorry! I haven't been able to get on for a few days because I had been buried alive. See, a few days ago I was in quite a bit of pain what with my burns and my teeth coming in, so I took some pills to help me sleep. It seems I took too many though and passed out long enough for my parents to get me into a coffin and arrange a mock funeral. I can't help but feel this was planned ahead of time. When I woke up, my mouth was covered in duct tape and I could faintly hear my mother sobbing through the cheap pine wood of the coffin. It's unfortunate that my hands were also tied or else I would have made it an open casket funeral. When the sobbing stopped, my father's voice leaked in. "If you come back, you're really going to die for real," he said. That was the last thing I wanted to hear. The worst part was when they buried me. I'm not claustrophobic, but everyone should be afraid of being in an enclosed space like that. Even when I managed to free my hands and remove the duct tape from my mouth, I felt short of breath the entire time. After crying for a few hours, I easily broke through the casket and began to dig my way up, taking occasional breaks to cry some more. Digging upward is hard, I have no idea how zombies do it. I don't know how long it took, but it felt like days. It was lucky that when I surfaced it was nighttime. What surprised me was that I did it just as someone was visiting my grave; my girlfriend. She had that sort of face that implied she was trying to cry, even though her tears ducts don't work. Underneath those strained eyes were a smile though, so she was happy to see me. After she helped me out of my grave, we sat and talked for awhile. It was terrible. She told me how she realized how much she missed me when she thought my father had slain me, and was glad that we could be back together. I told her I missed her too, instead of mentioning my thoughts of splitting up. I thought that was smart at the time, because she took me back to our apartment so I could clean up and sleep in an actual bed seeing as my coffin was terribly uncomfortable. After I was done using the shower, I asked her if she was going to sleep on the couch. She told me no, and so I asked her to give me some of the pillows of the bed then. That's when she giggled and told me that wouldn't be necessary. When the hints hit me, we jumped into bed together pretty fast. Not trying to brag about having sex, I just feel it's important to explain everything. I'm using her laptop now, and as I type this I feel guilty. Now it's like I'm using her. I have no interest in staying with her and yet I continue to act as if everything is normal just so we can sleep together. I feel like I should tell her the truth before dawn. What do you guys think?
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| # ? Feb 13, 2013 01:38 |
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| # ? May 25, 2013 02:19 |
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FigurativelyHitler posted:She may have been one of those psychic vampires. Have you had your aura checked? I think? I don't remember. Oh gently caress me.
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| # ? Feb 13, 2013 02:36 |
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