Make the worst simulator games - The Something Awful Forums

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The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Make the worst simulator games

Doctor Factical: Jul 8, 2011

Fenring posted:

One I did 6 years ago for a similar thread.

http://www.astragon.de/produktdetai...lator-2011.html

Looks like they beat you to it. Unless strip mining simulator is like DLC for the underground mining simulator or something.

# ? Feb 25, 2013 20:35

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# ? May 22, 2013 00:49

Arctic Bunny: Aug 3, 2012

Get ready for the most controversial game of the year! Featuring realistic blood effects, a wide open sandbox world and more hot lips than you can imagine, it's...

# ? Feb 25, 2013 20:36

Shimmergloom: May 20, 2007

Actually, the stamps that go on snail mail are "Briefmarken" - it would be the "Briefmarkenanlecksimulator"

# ? Feb 26, 2013 13:37

Comstar: Apr 20, 2007; But it was all right, everything was all right, the struggle was finished. He had won the victory over himself. He loved Princess Celestia

Jazza posted:

They still need to patch it to fix the sausages being horse meat.

# ? Feb 26, 2013 16:09

SCROTEBUSTIN: Sep 2, 2008; THIS CUSTOM TITLE IS WORTH MORE THAN THE CHUNK OF TEXAS I BLEW $2500 ON WHILE DRUNK

# ? Feb 26, 2013 18:13

Brain Blur: Jul 10, 2012; companion puzzle

# ? Mar 2, 2013 03:43

Chunderstorm: May 9, 2010

Brain Blur posted:

That box art is way too nice for one of these simulators. It's actually, you know. Appealing.

# ? Mar 2, 2013 17:54

Brain Blur: Jul 10, 2012; companion puzzle

Brain Blur fucked around with this message at Mar 2, 2013 around 19:17

# ? Mar 2, 2013 19:12

Brain Blur: Jul 10, 2012; companion puzzle

HarkToTheLoons posted:

That box art is way too nice for one of these simulators. It's actually, you know. Appealing.

Any game offering squeegee upgrades, an arsenal of cleaning solutions, and scaffolding customization can't help but be appealing.

# ? Mar 2, 2013 19:16

OMGVBFLOL: Dec 20, 2003; ....santa?

On the strength of this thread's recommendations, I actually bought Farming Simulator 2011 on Steam and have been unironically enjoying the zen-garden-like gameplay.

gently caress you, thread. gently caress. You.

# ? Mar 3, 2013 00:27

kizeesh: Aug 1, 2005; Im right and you're an ass.

Someone has actually made an Autism simulator.

we all lose.

http://gamejolt.com/games/strategy-sim/auti-sim/12761/

# ? Mar 3, 2013 03:24

Improbable Lobster: Jan 6, 2012

kizeesh posted:

Someone has actually made an Autism simulator.

we all lose.

http://gamejolt.com/games/strategy-sim/auti-sim/12761/

To be fair, it has the best possible name for an Autism simulator.

# ? Mar 3, 2013 03:42

Parallax Scroll: Nov 13, 2009

kizeesh posted:

Someone has actually made an Autism simulator.

we all lose.

http://gamejolt.com/games/strategy-sim/auti-sim/12761/

That is a scary game.

# ? Mar 3, 2013 10:19

nimh: Sep 18, 2004; by Y Kant Ozma Post

OMGVBFLOL posted:

On the strength of this thread's recommendations, I actually bought Farming Simulator 2011 on Steam and have been unironically enjoying the zen-garden-like gameplay.

gently caress you, thread. gently caress. You.

Bought Euro Truck 2 and now i have 2 garages and 5 gruff truckers are working for me.
What am i doing? How can listening to Polish live streamed radio whilst driving a truck on the autobahn feel so right?

# ? Mar 3, 2013 13:09

IPCRESS: May 27, 2012

OMGVBFLOL posted:

On the strength of this thread's recommendations, I actually bought Farming Simulator 2011 on Steam and have been unironically enjoying the zen-garden-like gameplay.

gently caress you, thread. gently caress. You.

You made the wrong choice. The 2013 edition mists the air with cocaine while it's being played.

# ? Mar 3, 2013 14:03

Lacklustre Hero: Jan 4, 2012; "I watch Rugby League for only one man."

Team Anasta

kizeesh posted:

Someone has actually made an Autism simulator.

we all lose.

http://gamejolt.com/games/strategy-sim/auti-sim/12761/

This feels like something out of a horror movie

# ? Mar 3, 2013 14:10

Baron Bifford: May 24, 2006

There is a game called Cart Life which simulates life as a low-income blue-collar worker. You can play either as a Ukrainian immigrant who owns a newsstand, a single mother barrista, or a bagel vendor. It's one of the most interesting games I came across last year. For one, it shows that you don't need an exciting backstory such as city mayor or superhero to have an interesting game, you just need a good balance between challenge and reward. The second thing is that this game teaches the player to emphasize with little people, people whom we typically make jokes about then dismiss.

Baron Bifford fucked around with this message at Mar 3, 2013 around 14:45

# ? Mar 3, 2013 14:34

Baron Bifford: May 24, 2006

kizeesh posted:

Someone has actually made an Autism simulator.

we all lose.

http://gamejolt.com/games/strategy-sim/auti-sim/12761/

I don't know what this guy thinks autism is like. Sounds aren't amplified, it's that they can't help taking notice of trivial backgrounds that most people just filter out. They also aren't face-blind. Just because they tend to ignore or look away from people doesn't mean they can't recognize them.

# ? Mar 3, 2013 14:57

Limerick: Oct 23, 2009

Tazzillekki posted:

Is there really a market for these kinds of games. Putting aside the people who play these kinds of games "ironically", does anyone actually buy those? What goes through the mind of the developers? Is there some deranged, yet incredibly boring, rich guy who keeps funding these games?

SO MANY QUESTIONS.

I'm pretty sure a lot of it is the actual industries involved buying the simulators to train their employees. (NO FUNNY ALLOWED)

# ? Mar 3, 2013 16:54

Baron Bifford: May 24, 2006

Tazzillekki posted:

Is there really a market for these kinds of games. Putting aside the people who play these kinds of games "ironically", does anyone actually buy those? What goes through the mind of the developers? Is there some deranged, yet incredibly boring, rich guy who keeps funding these games?

SO MANY QUESTIONS.

As I said above, the true appeal of a game is not the subject matter but how challenges and rewards are structured. Look at SimCity and The Sims - who would have ever thought that managing a household or a city could be fun stuff (granted, they're not quite simulators). Tetris is a game with falling blocks - who the hell would be interested in that?

# ? Mar 3, 2013 16:59

butre: Mar 2, 2013

NewtGoongrich posted:

So basically what you're saying is that Germans buy them unironically?

Nothing is funny in Germany.

# ? Mar 3, 2013 22:33

Lucy Heartfilia: May 31, 2012; Step 1: A anime with a friend.
Step 2: A anime to keep the cold out.
Step 3: A anime too much.
Step 4: Drunk and riotous.
Step 5: The summit attained. Jolly companions, a confirmed waifu.
Step 6: Poverty and Disease.
Step 7: Forsaken by Friends
Step 8: Desperation and crime
Step 9: Death by suicide

butre posted:

Nothing is funny in Germany.

This is funny in Germany:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qWjCkcAmzDc#t=52s

# ? Mar 3, 2013 22:43

Boiled Water: Apr 5, 2006; YOU ARE A BRAIN
IN A BUNKER

If by funny you mean banned, then yes.

# ? Mar 4, 2013 00:36

Unskilled Labour: Jul 23, 2009

butre posted:

Nothing is funny in Germany.

http://youtu.be/xmWN9fwmOKM

# ? Mar 4, 2013 00:48

Jefferoo: Jun 23, 2008; PLEASE GO AWAY JEFFEROO. YOU ARE NOT AN INTELLECTUAL SAVIOR, YOU ARE THE WORST POSTER IN GAMES(AND RAPIDLY GOING DEAF!) AND A BLIGHT UPON HUMANITY.

I... I used to do ads for Skype and Nokia and so on... I don't know how... somebody... somebody save me...

# ? Mar 4, 2013 10:10

Croccers: Jun 15, 2012

Fenring posted:

One I did 6 years ago for a similar thread.

You play the role of a young single mother with three kids. Operating heavy mining machinery doesn't quite pay the bills and your night college courses leave you short of time. Can you successfully combine the two jobs into one? Earn those tips but try to avoid distracting the other miners too much!

# ? Mar 4, 2013 14:25