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New CT imagery indicates that the freaky buzz-saw tooth-whorl of the Helicoprion puts it in the Chimera family, rather than the Shark family. sciency journal letter: http://rsbl.royalsocietypublishing....130057.full.pdf easy-reading for the public article with pictures: http://phenomena.nationalgeographic...freaky-ratfish/ At least we still have Stethacanthus...
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 21:22 |
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| # ? May 20, 2013 13:04 |
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I still can't wrap my head around how some of those Seussical looking motherfuckers actually used those spiral teeth.
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 21:29 |
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No way
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 21:29 |
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Crain posted:I still can't wrap my head around how some of those Seussical looking motherfuckers actually used those spiral teeth. I imagine it to be like a really  pizza cutter.
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 21:36 |
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Crain posted:I still can't wrap my head around how some of those Seussical looking motherfuckers actually used those spiral teeth. Per the article, kind of exactly like a circular saw. The whorl is the only tooth on the beast, and as it bit against the upper surface of its mouth the tooth-whorl rotated toward the back to pull whatever squiddy thing it was eating further back into the mouth. Pretty much like a snail radula. But radder. 
Slo-Tek fucked around with this message at Feb 27, 2013 around 22:05 |
| # ? Feb 27, 2013 21:55 |
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Some of evolution's earlier work was hilarious.
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 22:07 |
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Evolution, go home, you're drunk.
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 22:14 |
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What a dumb looking fish. I bet all the scientists that were studying it are really embarrassed now. They'll probably start pretending they were always into cooler animals like cobras or alligators.
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 22:15 |
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So it actually was a swimming 20-25 ft circular saw. That's pretty amazing.
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 22:20 |
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 I see the ancestry of Nicolas Cage.
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 22:24 |
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I'm pretty sure it's a Transformer.
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 22:25 |
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His hair is a bird. His mouth is a circular saw. This summer, watch as Nicolas Cage evolves into his final form.
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 22:26 |
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I never expected something that sounded that awesome to look so goddamn dumb.
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 22:40 |
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Ray Troll is a wonderful name.
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 22:49 |
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Slo-Tek posted:Per the article, kind of exactly like a circular saw. The whorl is the only tooth on the beast, and as it bit against the upper surface of its mouth the tooth-whorl rotated toward the back to pull whatever squiddy thing it was eating further back into the mouth. Thanks, that made much more sense than all those photos/drawings when you google search for helicoprion. Guess it's probably retracted most of the time.
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 22:59 |
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AKA Pseudonym posted:What a dumb looking fish. I bet all the scientists that were studying it are really embarrassed now. They'll probably start pretending they were always into cooler animals like cobras or alligators. Cobras don't have buzzsaws for mouths.
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 23:02 |
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Ape Fist posted:Some of evolution's earlier work was hilarious. It was just trying to find itself. Pizza saw fish are a legitimate form of expression 
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 23:18 |
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First they came for Pluto, and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a planet. Then they came for Helicoprion, and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a shark.
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 23:45 |
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Anyone else see the resemblance between this and  ?
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 23:50 |
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Whoo, Science!  I knew they'd figure it eventually, they can't resist a bizarre mystery.My personal completely-unsubstantiated guy-who-doesn't-have-a-clue-what-he's-talking-about pet theory was that the Helicoprion jaw was just one roll of teeth from a massive shark's jaw with entire rows of little buzzsaws stacked side by side like a giant grey nurse shark:  My theory was dumb but way more badass. 
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| # ? Feb 27, 2013 23:50 |
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Nenonen posted:
This poor guy must have spent every thought either reminding himself not to accidentally stab his own brain or cursing his lack of upper teeth.
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 00:40 |
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Remind me not to take the time machine to the beach.
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 01:00 |
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Those are some crazy-looking artist's renditions. I wonder what other prehistoric creatures looked totally different than we think they did?
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 01:09 |
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The rear end Stooge posted:Those are some crazy-looking artist's renditions. I wonder what other prehistoric creatures looked totally different than we think they did? If you never thought about how Triceratops might look with a mohawk then I've got a candidate for you: 
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 01:18 |
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This is such bullshit I'm so mad right now. So what some science said a thing. Look at it. It looks like a shark with a snail covered in spikes in its mouth. Here are my findings: 
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 01:30 |
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Not like you'd be able to make a distinction between shark and ratfish while it saws off your leg
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 01:36 |
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Stick Figure Mafia posted:
Works for me. gently caress these silly things like "science" and "evolutionary theory", that thing is a shark with a buzzsaw mouth.
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 01:54 |
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charts and diagrams
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I am seriously pissed at evolution right now for not giving me a chainsaw as a lower jaw. I mean, when I found out that the big E left me without a cool tail or feet that could grab things, I was a little upset, but now I'm livid. Uncool, evolution. Seriously uncool.
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 02:06 |
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What happens to the innermost teeth? Does this poo poo spiral inwards forever? Is it a fractal mouth, and every tooth is always preceded by another tooth?
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 02:26 |
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How does that even work.
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 02:36 |
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It didn't catch on so maybe not very well. edit: more seriously-- it looks like that poo poo unfurls in a controlled manner that is then retracted in a sawing motion. I would imagine getting pushed through the primordial seas while a not-shark saws you in to bits and then wheels around to gulp up the slurry is a pretty brutal way to go. The Sphinxster fucked around with this message at Feb 28, 2013 around 02:44 |
| # ? Feb 28, 2013 02:38 |
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Okay, so Helicoprion was not a shark, but still no answers on if Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear? Get your priorities straight science!AgentF posted:What happens to the innermost teeth? Does this poo poo spiral inwards forever? Is it a fractal mouth, and every tooth is always preceded by another tooth?
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 02:46 |
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Noni posted:I am seriously pissed at evolution right now for not giving me a chainsaw as a lower jaw. I mean, when I found out that the big E left me without a cool tail or feet that could grab things, I was a little upset, but now I'm livid. Uncool, evolution. Seriously uncool. Well the tradeoff is that you have a big ol' brain that allows you to do things like invent swords and guns, so that you can murder the tail and grasping-foot havers more effectively. Also math.
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 02:48 |
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One of the cool things about evolution is that it doesn't care. So it isn't a zero sum game and you don't have to give up kangaroo hops to have a giant brain. We could have been much more lucky. Maths are sweet, to be sure.
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 02:53 |
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Ape Has Killed Ape posted:Well the tradeoff is that you have a big ol' brain that allows you to do things like invent swords and guns, so that you can murder the tail and grasping-foot havers more effectively. Also math. Not quite. The tradeoff is that we have a big ol' brain that allows us to do things like prosthetics, so that we can create a buzz-saw jaw and then remove our own jaw and replace it with the better one. AND THEN use that jaw to murder the tail/grasping-foot havers more effectively. The buzz-saw jaw part is key.
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 02:56 |
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I can only imagine that older helicoprions would have had much larger lower jaws as the spiral would grow with age.
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 03:15 |
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Noni posted:I am seriously pissed at evolution right now for not giving me a chainsaw as a lower jaw. I mean, when I found out that the big E left me without a cool tail or feet that could grab things, I was a little upset, but now I'm livid. Uncool, evolution. Seriously uncool. I have feet that can grab things. Suck it, nerd.
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 03:18 |
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The Sphinxster posted:One of the cool things about evolution is that it doesn't care. Anything that is alive is a success.
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 03:20 |
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Twat McTwatterson posted:Anything that is alive is a success. In your face society.
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 03:33 |
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| # ? May 20, 2013 13:04 |
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I have a really hard time imagining this thing as a predator, biting with that sort of lower jaw. I can only imagine it, like, scraping algae and stuff off of rocks in a slow, methodical fashion.
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| # ? Feb 28, 2013 03:38 |
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