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Crasscrab posted:This is why I always steer clear of geese. They're just huge dickheads looking for trouble. I learned that lesson well when I was ~6 and was eating a PB&J sandwich in the park with my brother and a goose strolled right up to me, took the sandwich from my hand and bit my finger a couple of times for good measure. Geese are the worst and I would love to punch that loving poop machine now. poo poo, new page.  [Probably old] ContentNWS for part of some dude's dick. (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)
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Apr 22, 2013 01:40
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ilysespieces posted:I learned that lesson well when I was ~6 and was eating a PB&J sandwich in the park with my brother and a goose strolled right up to me, took the sandwich from my hand and bit my finger a couple of times for good measure. Years ago my sister was at a park with her two small kids when a goose went after them, trying to peck at here infant son. Se grabbed her small son under here arm and tried to flee, pushing the stroller with one arm and kicking at the goose. As she gets close to the parking lot these two guys run over and fight off the goose. They then go over to her to make sure they are all ok and then one of them offers to go get a gun out of his car and kill the goose "you know mam, for vengeance". My sister declined their offer. I guess southern womanhood needs constant protection from horny foreigners after all.
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Apr 22, 2013 02:06
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I have never been attacked by geese what the hell is in your guy's water
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Apr 22, 2013 03:15
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Geese are never not violent, lovely creatures. I've had way too many fishing trips ruined by angry geese or their poo poo making the river bank very unpleasant. gently caress all the geese.
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Apr 22, 2013 03:27
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Farecoal posted:I have never been attacked by geese what the hell is in your guy's water Geese   (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)
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Apr 22, 2013 03:28
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I've never had geese attack, but they've only stopped by where ever I've run into them on the way south in for the winter. They are poop machines, though. That's a duck, isn't it?
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Apr 22, 2013 04:08
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Yes, note the yellow dog face mask.Doctor Doctor posted:Geese Not gonna lie, that looks like a  party.
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Apr 22, 2013 04:25
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Fucknag posted:Yes, note the yellow dog face mask. I think that's a Goose wearing a poor dog's face as a mask.
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Apr 22, 2013 05:14
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Fucknag posted:Yes, note the yellow dog face mask. Sunglasses + plastic lei?  Hell yeah.
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Apr 22, 2013 05:24
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Farecoal posted:I have never been attacked by geese what the hell is in your guy's water There is a group of geese that hang out in a major river near my folks' place. They are docile because two elderly ladies in the neighborhood keep them loaded with breadcrumbs every day, and then once a year these old ladies whack a few of them for Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners. Anyway, it was some moron's bright idea to have geese at a petting zoo my daycare took me too when I was five. I was minding my own business when this goose chased me down and bit me in the rear end. My dad often took me fishing at this local lake, and one year it was overrun with geese. Still traumatized by my experience a few years earlier, I was pretty scared, but my dad was good at keeping those fuckers away. One time though, these geese came out of nowhere, swaggering like a bunch of gangsters. One of them charged me, and my dad kicked it square in the rear end. It took a big poo poo as it tumbled through the air. gently caress that goose.
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Apr 22, 2013 06:19
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Apr 22, 2013 06:20
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jidohanbaiki posted:It took a big poo poo as it tumbled through the air. Deer are like this too. I dunno what it is about their biology that causes it, but geese and deer are like pressurized bags of poo poo that go off at the slightest provocation. Kick one, hit one with your car, poke one with a stick, KABOOM and you're cleaning poo poo out of every little crack and corner in a fifty-foot radius. e: yeah, a lot like the above image 
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Apr 22, 2013 06:22
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Geese look extremely easy to kill and probably delicious, just sayin'
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Apr 22, 2013 06:40
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^ Exactly.jidohanbaiki posted:There is a group of geese that hang out in a major river near my folks' place. They are docile because two elderly ladies in the neighborhood keep them loaded with breadcrumbs every day, and then once a year these old ladies whack a few of them for Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners.
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Apr 22, 2013 06:53
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I was taking my son for a walk in his stroller at the park when we were attacked by geese. Without provocation one of them went straight for my son and I kicked it hard enough that it smacked into a hot dog stand and broke its wing. I'm a bleeding heart idiot, so I bundled it in a blanket football style and walked half a mile to the nearest vet to get it help, it bit me four times along the way. Once he was secure and Wildlife Rescue people were on their way, I started back to the park. When I got there we were attacked again, so I kicked another goose. That one didn't get help, bitch should have paid loving attention. gently caress a goose.
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Apr 22, 2013 06:55
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At my school some girl kicked a goose and was expelled. Whether it attacked her or she just kicked it for shits I have no idea, its been forgotten over time. I hated trying to avoid the millions of piles of poop laying everywhere across campus. I did like when the geese would play king of the hill with the buildings. They'd sit on the corner of the roof and honk loudly a bunch declaring it their turf 
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Apr 22, 2013 07:06
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Apr 22, 2013 08:38
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Apr 22, 2013 09:24
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Never forget! 
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Apr 22, 2013 12:19
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I'm just going to go ahead and leave this here... http://www.buzzfeed.com/lukelewis/newspaper-and-magazine-layout-disasters
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Apr 22, 2013 13:25
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Apr 22, 2013 13:43
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Apr 22, 2013 14:14
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MeLKoR posted:Never forget! Lance Armstrong, a self portrait
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Apr 22, 2013 16:29
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Apr 22, 2013 17:45
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As obnoxious as Geese are, I'd rather deal with them than stupid rear end in a top hat Turkeys.
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Apr 22, 2013 17:58
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Jesus christ I have tears in my eyes from the last 2 pages of geese stories.
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Apr 22, 2013 18:18
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It's weird, I encounter geese multiple times a week on the golf course and the business park where I work, I've never had a problem with any of them. They will cross the street and gently caress traffic up without caring, but why should they care?
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Apr 22, 2013 18:21
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Hey, are pictures okay in the bird chat thread?
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Apr 22, 2013 18:25
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These pictures I took at the weekend seem relevant: For reference these were taken with a 300mm lens, so I was nowhere near the crazy fucker when he decided to go for me.
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Apr 22, 2013 19:04
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Apr 22, 2013 19:27
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So dignified, so majestic...
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Apr 22, 2013 19:32
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Apr 22, 2013 19:54
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So dignified, so majestic...
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Apr 22, 2013 20:12
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Please disregard. Wait a minute, I see other pictures with text even on this page . . . Literally Esoteric has a new favorite as of 20:43 on Apr 22, 2013 |
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Apr 22, 2013 20:20
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Wrong thread. 
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Apr 22, 2013 20:24
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Killer robot posted:Hey, are pictures okay in the bird chat thread? Why you hurt Goosio?
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Apr 22, 2013 21:01
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Sanford posted:These pictures I took at the weekend seem relevant:  Took this with a 200mm, tho I did get pretty close, they were honking a bit, looked disturbed, I was pushing my luck though.
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Apr 22, 2013 21:39
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D C posted:
Lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eyes...
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Apr 22, 2013 21:44
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D C posted:Took this with a 200mm, tho I did get pretty close, they were honking a bit, looked disturbed, I was pushing my luck though. Here is how to photograph geese: 
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Apr 22, 2013 21:45
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Brother Jonathan posted:Here is how to photograph geese: The only thing geese fear: Swans. Sadly this man died after being viciously beaten to death by a real swan.
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Apr 22, 2013 22:03
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