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Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Pacific Command




The World Needs Heroes. Which is a shame, because its got this lot.

Where the world needs strong men and women who will stop at nothing to save people. It has this lot, who will stop at nothing to make a bad joke.

The world needs people who the very sight of will inspire a man to greatness. It has a Druid that spends most of his time pretending to be a Dinosaur, a Bard that can barely sing, A bloody Dragon(born) Paladin, an Elf of God, a walking Swiss army knife of a Dwarf, Another bloody Druid and a Halfling Rogue.

Is it any wonder the worlds come apart at the seams?


Whats is Dungeons and Dragons?

Been under a rock eh? Its the first role-playing game, now in its forth edition. You pretend to be an elf and stab imaginary creatures.
Like all role-playing games, people who've never tried it put it down as silly. Then again, I think a bunch of people sitting on uncomfortable chairs for hours on end in the freezing cold while swearing at a bunch of overpayed players is stupid, so what do they know.


Oh god the Puns

Yeah, if you think puns are the lowest form of humor, don't even click on a single one of these video.


Right, that's all I have for now. I'm sure the players will be in to give more information on their own fevered imagination. So lets get on with the vids. I'm sure this will grow as we go on.
Everyone's learning the program, so Session 1 is a bit combat heavy. Its the best way to get them used to the buttons they have to press.


MP3s

Session 1 - There goes the Neighborhood
Session 2 - Your name makes no sense
Session 3 - Escape from Elfcatraz
Session 4 - Oh my fertile fields!
Session 5 - The Door Says Push
Session 6 - Diplomacy
Session 7 - The War
Session 8 - You asked for this!
Session 9 - Why would you think Necromancers?
Session 10 - Attack of the Plot
Session 11 - L-Space Adventures
Session 12 - The Trial
Session 13 MP3 lost. Sorry
Session 14 - All the Misses
Session 15 - Tangent after Tangent
Session 16 - The Council of Accents
Session 17 - Temple Trap

Videos

Session - 1

Part 1 - There goes the Neighborhood
Part 2 - Food!
Part 3 - Combat Mechanics
Part 4 - Heal the Halfling
Part 5 - This is Gnome laughing matter

Session 2
Part 1 - Your name makes no sense!
Part 2 - Lay on fist!
Part 3 - We have a very Chompy party
Part 4 - Blank faced peasents
Part 5 - Former Captain Chief Bosun Gnomeblight
Part 6 - Oy! No Metagaming there!

Session 3
Part 1 - Wood means Elves right?
Part 2 - Splitting the party.
Part 3 - You are all terrible people
Part 4 - Save us meatsheilds!
Part 5 - (Halfling) Death from above.
Part 6 - Please stop dying.

Session 4

Part 1 - The Elf Problem
Part 2 - Oh my fertile fields!
Part 3 - An elementry trap.
Part 4 - Druids burn well
Part 5 - Hugging the air HD

Session 5
Part 1 - The Door Says Push
Part 2 - An Elemental Solution
Part 3 - The Papa Bear Zone
Part 4 - Peaceful Forest

Session 6
Part 1 - Dropping the Toad
Part 2 - Playing Trust better than Trust
Part 3 - Dinosaw
Part 4 - Political Maps

Session 7
Part 1 - Stoned Robot Kingdom
Part 2 - Democratic Darleks
Part 3 - Dinosaur Justice
Part 4 - The Battle
Part 5 - Inter part conflict.

Session 8
Part 1 - The (Terrible) state of the Realm
Part 2 - Don't go down to the water
Part 3 - Ridiculous, but effective
Part 4 - Water Secure

Session 9
Part 1 - Sidetracks and happy tombs
Part 2 - Frikkin Arcanasaurus
Part 3 - All the 20's
Part 4 - Turn Undead
Part 5 - Keeping on the Pressure

Session 10
Part 1 - Incoming Plot
Part 2 - Fall back!
Part 3 - This was a bad idea
Part 4 - We have a crazy Idea

Session 11
Part 1 - An infinity of Books
Part 2 - An Enemy made of Puns
Part 3 - All the book puns
Part 4 - The Libarian

Session 12
Part 1 - Jail
Part 2 - Opening statements
Part 3 - Cross examining[/ur

Session 13
[url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U3shhCU2ZbQ]Part 1 - Off to a Good Start

Part 2 - Dibs!
Part 3 - Diplomacy over!
Part 4 - Playing with fire!
Part 5 - Maximum Advantage!

Session 14
Part 1 - Maths Puns are a sin
Part 2 - Mah Toad
Part 3 - This is taking a while
Part 4 - Somebody hit SOMETHING!
Part 5 - Down and down again

Session 15
Part 1 - Tangent after Tangent
Part 2 - The Broken GM

Session 16
Part 1 - Is that Dwarf possessed?
Part 2 - Broken Again
Part 3 - A Cunning Plan

Session 17
Part 1 - What Magic Items?
Part 2 - Trap Sprung
Part 3 - Everybody Misses
Part 4 - You Again!

Grey Hunter fucked around with this message at Nov 28, 2013 around 16:06

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ForeverBWFC
Oct 19, 2011

Oh, the lads! You should've seen 'em running!
Ask 'em why and they reply the Bolton Boys are coming! All the lads and lasses, smiles upon their faces,

WALKING DOWN THE MANNY ROAD, TO SEE THE BURNDEN ACES!


I would like to start with a dual apology - firstly for the puns and secondly for my horrendously hung-over and rough voice. All will be better next week! The voice I mean, the puns will only get worse!

Turos Kensei
Dec 13, 2009


In true fashion, I apologize for nothing! Least of all the puns!

Zebrin
Mar 12, 2010

Chopping trees down and making elves cry.


For you Turos, that is nothing more then staying true to form.
When the GM starts laughing within the first ten minutes of a game, you know that your group is either set, or screwed.

Zebrin fucked around with this message at May 6, 2013 around 16:50

Added Space
Jul 13, 2012

Visible light lasers are within the realm of possibility........My guy is being a little paranoid.

Once again I'm the one getting chewed up.

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Pacific Command


That was some fantastic rolls by Mr dragon.

Serpentis
May 31, 2011

Well, if I really HAVE to shoot you in the bollocks to shut you up, then I guess I'll need to, post-haste, for everyone else's sake.


Added Space posted:

Once again I'm the one getting chewed up.

We fixed most of you! Besides, scars are manly.

zerosix
Jun 22, 2012


I personally cant wait to get out of the sticks. Trying to play over a cell data plan crashed and burned quickly.

Turos Kensei
Dec 13, 2009


Added Space posted:

Once again I'm the one getting chewed up.

I can sing you better.

Araganzar
May 24, 2003

Needs more cowbell!

Added Space posted:

Once again I'm the one getting chewed up.

Hey, I got nicked by a crossbow, and I don't know when the hell I'm gonna be able to get some new leathers. That jerkin was pretty much the heart of the whole ensemble. Plus there's this little bear patch there when I shapeshift now.

Wounds heal, man. But a jerkin like that...

ForeverBWFC
Oct 19, 2011

Oh, the lads! You should've seen 'em running!
Ask 'em why and they reply the Bolton Boys are coming! All the lads and lasses, smiles upon their faces,

WALKING DOWN THE MANNY ROAD, TO SEE THE BURNDEN ACES!


Araganzar posted:

this little bear patch

Honestly not sure if this was intentional, but it made me giggle...

fadderman
Feb 3, 2008
dyslectic lurker

I gonna need to know if the DM is aware of that many of his player characters are badly made, not a singel one of them got a +5 bonus to there main stat. This is really importend in D&D 4th, since the name of the game is to seek every advantage to become better murder hobos. i am not saying that the characters need to be remade just that DM need to alter the monsters defenses a bit lower since the math assumes that chars have at least a +4 bonus to hit.
only thing that i saw the DM do wrong was that melee 2 doesn't mean that there is 2 melee attacks but that melee attack has a reach of 2 squares.

god i am sperging here a bit but i loved the video and don't want to see you guys get pissed at the system for making you whiff at your attack rolls and getting noting done

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Pacific Command


fadderman posted:

only thing that i saw the DM do wrong was that melee 2 doesn't mean that there is 2 melee attacks but that melee attack has a reach of 2 squares.

god i am sperging here a bit but i loved the video and don't want to see you guys get pissed at the system for making you whiff at your attack rolls and getting noting done

Glad you enjoyed them

I've not played D&D in over a year and a half, and I'm so rusty I'm surprised I've not given all my players Tetanus.

fadderman
Feb 3, 2008
dyslectic lurker

glad that i am not coming of as a sort of charop warrior from the trad games subforum

Veloxyll
May 3, 2011

Fuck you say?!

fadderman posted:

I gonna need to know if the DM is aware of that many of his player characters are badly made, not a singel one of them got a +5 bonus to there main stat. This is really importend in D&D 4th, since the name of the game is to seek every advantage to become better murder hobos. i am not saying that the characters need to be remade just that DM need to alter the monsters defenses a bit lower since the math assumes that chars have at least a +4 bonus to hit.
only thing that i saw the DM do wrong was that melee 2 doesn't mean that there is 2 melee attacks but that melee attack has a reach of 2 squares.

god i am sperging here a bit but i loved the video and don't want to see you guys get pissed at the system for making you whiff at your attack rolls and getting noting done

They killed a baby dragon at level 1! They're fine.

And it'll be a nice change from the RT thread where we destroy pretty much everything he throws at us >.> Even with messing up combat mechanics.
(The only thing worse than the RT Fantasy Grounds module...is Fantasy Flight books.)

When I see D&D games in FG, I kind of want to work to fix the RT module
At least have the dice roll in the right order or something!

Cooked Auto
Aug 4, 2007

If you will not serve in combat, you will serve on the firing line!

There's an issue with the audio version with that it becomes almost impossible to hear the players around the 14 minute mark after Grey had to reconnect after one of them dropped out.

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Pacific Command


Cooked Auto posted:

There's an issue with the audio version with that it becomes almost impossible to hear the players around the 14 minute mark after Grey had to reconnect after one of them dropped out.

I'll take a look at that, something went odd with the audio in the videos as well, but there is no real fix for it, I seem to be coming in much stronger than most everyone else.

EDIT

The audio levels are done for, the best you can have is REALLY loud me, as I'm not going through 2:45mins of audio reducing the volume of me alone.

http://tindeck.com/listen/kdpa

Grey Hunter fucked around with this message at May 7, 2013 around 15:22

Araganzar
May 24, 2003

Needs more cowbell!

fadderman posted:

I gonna need to know if the DM is aware of that many of his player characters are badly made, not a singel one of them got a +5 bonus to there main stat. This is really importend in D&D 4th, since the name of the game is to seek every advantage to become better murder hobos. i am not saying that the characters need to be remade just that DM need to alter the monsters defenses a bit lower since the math assumes that chars have at least a +4 bonus to hit.
only thing that i saw the DM do wrong was that melee 2 doesn't mean that there is 2 melee attacks but that melee attack has a reach of 2 squares.

I've hardly played any 4e D&D. However, only the most munchkiny builds I found on druids recommended over a +4 to start with. I don't know how into mechanics we want to get, but I'd be happy to post my character for critique. I prefer roleplaying over combat, but I did hear 4e over-corrected and made hitting too hard. This post was pretty instructive to me for choosing my starting stats and for this:

some guy on some forums posted:

Many people feel expertise bonuses are necessary to make the math work. Here's the deal: if you extrapolate a character's attack bonuses and a monster's defenses, incorporating expected magic items and so on, the attack bonuses increase slower than the defenses. Therefore, without looking at any other factors, the characters hit less often as they level.
At level 1, a typical melee character has +4 to hit from his stats, +0 from his level, and let's say a +3 proficiency bonus from his weapon. That's a +7 to hit, versus a typical AC of 15 for a level 1 monster.
At level 30, the same character has +8 to hit from his stats, +15 from his level, +3 proficiency bonus from his weapon, and the weapon is +6 as well. That's a +32 to hit, but the monster has an AC of 44.

I think we are fine. However, we should want viewers to find the combat challenging and interesting, and close to their experiences. Most people suggest having the GM simply give the weapon/implement expertise (+1 to hit) feat to players for free. If we want to do any correction, I'd prefer that over GH having to think about it all the time when adding NPCs.

Glad you like the session. I wish we'd been recording when GH's cat had the massive cat battle. It sounded like two cougars going at it inside a Volkswagen. Fighting, I mean. I know the early combat was tedious but we are very new to the interface. We should tighten up considerably next session. Again, just talking about fighting there.

Araganzar
May 24, 2003

Needs more cowbell!

THE GUIDE TO PLAYERS:
Added Space plays: Attey - Hobbit rogue. Stabby flipper. Rope dangler.
Araganzar plays: Gator - Elven druid. Runs like Deion, hits like Leon, talks like Levon.
ForeverBWFC plays: Aelar - Elven cleric. Bow plunker. Combat avoider.
Serpentis plays: Mirak - Paladin. A loving dragon. Has probably used the phrase "in a bit of a pickle."
Turos Kensei plays: Trust Half-elven bard. Singing has him in pole position for Most Likely To Be PKed.
Ygmir plays: Malkar - Warforged druid. Robot. Dinosaur. Lover.

ZeroSix is playing a dwarf swiss army knife, but will not be doing much as we have welded the joints on his armor and plan on using him as a hood ornament or exotic weapon, or both. Alectai will be playing a wyzzyrd blaster. No word yet on whether he is a robot or a dinosaur, but I can hope...

Serpentis
May 31, 2011

Well, if I really HAVE to shoot you in the bollocks to shut you up, then I guess I'll need to, post-haste, for everyone else's sake.


I haven't recently, actually, but cheers for giving me a really flimsy excuse to start annoying the punsmith with it (there can't be too many words that rhyme with pickle...)

fadderman
Feb 3, 2008
dyslectic lurker

Ask the DM to use inherent bonuses. it means that you don't need the treadmill of magic weapons and armor, and can instead use items with cool effect instead.

Also http://orokos.com/dnd4e/sheets/ is place where one can make ones char sheet public in all its glory. Not really necessary now but if you guys are having difficulties post the char there and ask the tread for help

And there exist a feat for the dwarf fighter if he wants to use multiple weapon types, it's called master of arms and makes switching weapons a minor or was it a free action can't remember.

fadderman fucked around with this message at May 7, 2013 around 18:47

ForeverBWFC
Oct 19, 2011

Oh, the lads! You should've seen 'em running!
Ask 'em why and they reply the Bolton Boys are coming! All the lads and lasses, smiles upon their faces,

WALKING DOWN THE MANNY ROAD, TO SEE THE BURNDEN ACES!


Serpentis posted:

I haven't recently, actually, but cheers for giving me a really flimsy excuse to start annoying the punsmith with it (there can't be too many words that rhyme with pickle...)

A pun doesn't need to rhyme! And besides, a good pun about pickles would certainly be well-preserved in the memory!

SirSamVimes
Jul 21, 2008

JIMMY JIMS?!

fadderman posted:

I gonna need to know if the DM is aware of that many of his player characters are badly made, not a singel one of them got a +5 bonus to there main stat. This is really importend in D&D 4th, since the name of the game is to seek every advantage to become better murder hobos. i am not saying that the characters need to be remade just that DM need to alter the monsters defenses a bit lower since the math assumes that chars have at least a +4 bonus to hit.
only thing that i saw the DM do wrong was that melee 2 doesn't mean that there is 2 melee attacks but that melee attack has a reach of 2 squares.

god i am sperging here a bit but i loved the video and don't want to see you guys get pissed at the system for making you whiff at your attack rolls and getting noting done

Using the standard array score distribution, I got a +4 on my highest stat even with a +2 racial. How is ti possible to get +5 at level 1?

Added Space
Jul 13, 2012

Visible light lasers are within the realm of possibility........My guy is being a little paranoid.

I think I did reasonably. I have +4 to hit from my stat, +3 from weapon proficiency, +1 for being a melee rogue, and I should usually be getting a +2 for CA. That's +10 already, and I can potentially raise this by another +3 by level 4.

aegof
Mar 2, 2011


DM, if your players are running around with less than +4s, go easy on 'em in fights.

SirSamVimes posted:

Using the standard array score distribution, I got a +4 on my highest stat even with a +2 racial. How is ti possible to get +5 at level 1?

The standard array spreads stats around more than most characters will ever need: 16 14 13 12 11 10. Because of the way the math works, and the way dnd rewards specialization, nearly every character is better off focusing on a single primary, a single secondary, and putting whatever's left in a tertiary. (18 14 11 10 10 8, or 18 13 13 10 10 8) The ignored stats are the ones your class is never going to use; putting anything in them is basically a waste.

fadderman
Feb 3, 2008
dyslectic lurker

SirSamVimes posted:

Using the standard array score distribution, I got a +4 on my highest stat even with a +2 racial. How is ti possible to get +5 at level 1?

aegof mentions that DND 4th rewards specialising and the simple char in dnd is just 20 in primary 14 in a secondery stat and forget that the rest of the stats exists. Power choice is also very importend, and you just look at the power which uses your chosen secondery stat. many of the classes have the possiblitet of using different secondery stats. For example fighters can either have con or dex as a secondery.

Edit: lets move on if this become a problem it will be later anyway. But i just want to say that the DM got a good adventure hook and really want to see where it will go.

fadderman fucked around with this message at May 8, 2013 around 07:47

mithykyl
Apr 5, 2011


I hope you don't mind me asking, but what program are you guys using to play dnd on? A few long distance friends and I were thinking of starting up a campaign and what your using looks amazing.

TheDemon
Dec 11, 2006

...on the plus side I'm feeling much more angry now than I expected so this totally helps me get in character.


I've found 16+2 stat+racial in the primary stat works just fine, although I suppose technically speaking it works 5% less well. Standard Array is still not well-designed though, since if you're taking 16+2 you usually want a second 16+2 in your secondary stat.

e: having finished listening to the podcast, I don't think it's a problem here either. Also I love the look of this particular gametable

TheDemon fucked around with this message at May 8, 2013 around 07:42

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Pacific Command


The gametable is called Fantasy Grounds. I'm running the Ultimate version which allows people to connect to me for free. Its a bit costly, but allows me to just start games without people having to fork out - and with about 70 hours of recorded gaming, plus the D&D game I ran with off boead people for about 30 sessions, I've got my moneys worth out of that.

Its not to bad for the full/lie versions really. And for D&D you get some fantastic helpers. I have the libary files that allow you to drag and drop monsters from a good load of the books. - These are semi-legal - if you have D&D insider your allowed to make them using the scrape program, but not disribute them.

Not that stops people.

As for stats, I get worried when people say they will never use a stat - maybe not in combat, but not all the game is combat.....

Turos Kensei
Dec 13, 2009


Trust has not come to break the game, but to play it.

And no one is gonna PK me. I'm like the lovable mascot! And I won't sing that often, only when humor calls for it. A Sucker Pun-ch, is far more powerful.

Veloxyll
May 3, 2011

Fuck you say?!

Turos Kensei posted:

Trust has not come to break the game, but to play it.

And no one is gonna PK me. I'm like the lovable mascot! And I won't sing that often, only when humor calls for it. A Sucker Pun-ch, is far more powerful.

and this is why you will be PK'd.

Or GM killed.

Possibly both in the same turn.

Yapping Eevee
Nov 12, 2011



Turos Kensei posted:

A Sucker Pun-ch, is far more powerful.
Someone reads Brentalfloss' comic, I see.

Serpentis
May 31, 2011

Well, if I really HAVE to shoot you in the bollocks to shut you up, then I guess I'll need to, post-haste, for everyone else's sake.


Veloxyll posted:

and this is why you will be PK'd.

Or GM killed.

Possibly Definitely both in the same turn.



And we're not saying you're a gamebreaker, Turos, not at all. Just a hearts, mind and soul-breaker! (We love you really.)

Araganzar
May 24, 2003

Needs more cowbell!

fadderman posted:

Ask the DM to use inherent bonuses. it means that you don't need the treadmill of magic weapons and armor, and can instead use items with cool effect instead.

Also http://orokos.com/dnd4e/sheets/ is place where one can make ones char sheet public in all its glory. Not really necessary now but if you guys are having difficulties post the char there and ask the tread for help

And there exist a feat for the dwarf fighter if he wants to use multiple weapon types, it's called master of arms and makes switching weapons a minor or was it a free action can't remember.

I put Gator up on this if anyone wants to pick it apart. I had to swap out Grasping Tides for Swarm of Locusts at the last second, but I'm hoping I can get in early next time and input the power.

The dwarf has something cooler than master of arms for that. Hopefully we get to see it this weekend! If he can find a can opener!

Also:


Well, I hope now Gnome 1 respects this pun-ishing we's issuin'.

Araganzar fucked around with this message at May 9, 2013 around 04:14

fadderman
Feb 3, 2008
dyslectic lurker

Araganzar posted:

I put Gator up on this if anyone wants to pick it apart. I had to swap out Grasping Tides for Swarm of Locusts at the last second, but I'm hoping I can get in early next time and input the power.

The dwarf has something cooler than master of arms for that. Hopefully we get to see it this weekend! If he can find a can opener!

Also:


Well, I hope now Gnome 1 respects this pun-ishing we's issuin'.

Looking at the char sheet it seems fine, just 5% less hit which is okay for now and later you guys will have learned the system better and can get more synergetic bonuses from each other. Power selection looks good with dex riders, you could even use some powers with con riders too if those powers sounds cool. an A- for a first time player and the char should serve you well on your journey to kill monsters and take their loot.

zerosix
Jun 22, 2012


Araganzar posted:


ZeroSix is playing a dwarf swiss army knife, but will not be doing much as we have welded the joints on his armor and plan on using him as a hood ornament or exotic weapon, or both. Alectai will be playing a wyzzyrd blaster. No word yet on whether he is a robot or a dinosaur, but I can hope...

Do i at lest have Air holes?

aerion111
Nov 29, 2011

Prodigy of Curiosity.
Master of Jacks.
Apprentice of Masks.
And, when fighting the forces of darkness, always remember: "Armor of Darkness, Weapon of Light"

zerosix posted:

Do i at lest have Air holes?

Since when do dwarves need air holes?
Those make for weaknesses in the dungeon-fort.

Added Space
Jul 13, 2012

Visible light lasers are within the realm of possibility........My guy is being a little paranoid.

What can I say except, REVENGE!!!

Serpentis
May 31, 2011

Well, if I really HAVE to shoot you in the bollocks to shut you up, then I guess I'll need to, post-haste, for everyone else's sake.


Added Space posted:

What can I say except, REVENGE!!!

Right place, wrong time, wrong game, wrong multiverse. And yet, revenge still finds a way!

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zerosix
Jun 22, 2012


I personally don't know if berk is over educated to be a fighter or I should tone down the metaphysics.

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