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in_cahoots posted:How much do you guys throw out? From the restaurant numbers and the school lunches it seems like you're buying somewhere around a quarter of your meals from stores. I don't see how you can spend so much on groceries and nearly $100 in fast food in a month. We don't throw out much food. There are frequently extra teenagers over, and we have a rule that if they have someone over at dinner without warning they have to share food with their friend. However, after I package up a portion for a meal at work, leftovers are fair game for snacks. The kids are almost out of school for summer, but they will be taking their own lunches in the fall. There is no way for them to heat up leftovers, so we'll have to figure out something else. And the fast food is going to stop. I'm mad at us that we started doing that again. Lolie posted:This could turn out to be a worse option than letting the bank foreclose. What does your husband intend to do with the house once you find a rental property? A short sale? How much do you anticipate the deficiency will be when the house is sold (whether by the bank at auction or as a short sale by your husband)? The problem is finding a rental property before the auction date. Tuesday we are going to contact some local Realtors and see if they know of any other rentals. There are no 3 bedroom apartments anywhere in the area. We are widening our area to look. I just really don't want to have to switch schools.
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May 27, 2013 01:21
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LoveMeDead posted:There is very little impulse spending during our weekly grocery trip. 75% of what we buy is on sale, discounted, or we have coupons for. We are going to look over old receipts and see what we can cut. We don't usually make a list because we have about 15 go-to meals and choose which one based on what cheap meat we can find. The impulse spending comes when we go to wal-mart and random other trips. So ... make lists of what you need when you go to Wal-Mart or other "random trips"? Don't just go shopping - do it with purpose, for poo poo you need. If all you need is toilet paper and soap, write that down and then only buy toilet paper and soap. Just like a grocery list but with household/personal goods.  Also, your kids will survive switching schools. It happens and is not a big deal.
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May 27, 2013 01:24
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in_cahoots posted:How much do you guys throw out? From the restaurant numbers and the school lunches it seems like you're buying somewhere around a quarter of your meals from stores. I don't see how you can spend so much on groceries and nearly $100 in fast food in a month. We need a better idea of the grocery categories. The bleeding could be coming from non-food items (when I had teenagers at home, the amount we spent on deodorant, shampoo and conditioner, feminine hygiene products, cleaning products, laundry products, shaving products, skin care products, etc was pretty horrific). I'm also curious about whether the teenagers have expectations which exceed the family income and the extent to which they're involved in the budgeting. No matter how much you say you can't afford something, if you keep buying them things the family budget can't afford, or you hand over money you can't afford, you're creating a skewed version of reality. They need to understand that just because you have cash in your wallet or money in the bank doesn't mean that money is "free" money. Many teenagers fail to grasp this concept because parents don't know how to say "no". If the kids know about the college fund, if they're being given money for school camps, if they're being given money for fast food, and this is happening while the mortgage isn't being paid then I'd suggest that you're creating an illusion of being "able to afford poo poo" which is at odds with the reality (you're far from the only parent who does this - my best friend spent $3000 on presents for her kids last Christmas and "afforded" that by not paying her rent) and that it's probably time to sit down with the kids and lay it on the table before they start making bad financial choices of their own. quote:The problem is finding a rental property before the auction date. Tuesday we are going to contact some local Realtors and see if they know of any other rentals. Most people who rent are used to finding a new place at pretty short notice if their lease isn't renewed (you can't look too soon or you're looking at paying rent on two properties). Don't limit your search to properties listed by agents (especially if there are any defaults on your credit records). Try to find out how the hidden rental market works in your area (it's often word of mouth in rural areas, so mention that you're looking for a property to everyone you encounter, from people at work to the cashier at the supermarket). At the moment it sounds like you're trying to justify hanging onto a toxic asset, which might be almost understandable if it wasn't the absolute hell-hole you've described. I'm pretty sure your kids would prefer to live in a home which isn't (literally) falling apart to the extent that it sounds like it's actually unsafe. Lolie fucked around with this message at 01:47 on May 27, 2013 |
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May 27, 2013 01:29
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Lolie posted:We need a better idea of the grocery categories. The bleeding could be coming from non-food items (when I had teenagers at home, the amount we spent on deodorant, shampoo and conditioner, feminine hygiene products, cleaning products, laundry products, shaving products, skin care products, etc was pretty horrific). Our youngest is extremely frugal. So much so that when we went shopping a few months ago with gift cards she was given for Christmas and her birthday, she wouldn't even splurge on herself. She shopped sales and bought some underwear with some of it because she found a good deal. She absolutely hates asking us for money. The 17 year seems to have my sense of finances and doesn't understand. He keeps joining clubs, then asks for money for all of the trips and things that club does. We say no to him a lot, but he keeps asking. It's hard to say no to AP tests though. I hate saying no. He did miss prom this year because we couldn't afford it. We stopped putting money into the college funds, but because of the way they are set up we lose money if we take anything out before the kids turn 18. We do have a retirement fund, my husband's 401k from work was rolled into an account that we aren't currently putting any money into. It just sits there and gains interest. I have a 401k through work that I contribute 3% into. I know the kids will survive switching schools. My biggest issue is that schools down here are lovely and I don't want them at a horrible school. We can't afford to move back to Wisconsin like we plan to in a few years, so we need to stay within a limited area here.
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May 27, 2013 01:50
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Lolie posted:
I'm not trying to justify it, I'm terrified of being homeless. It feels safer to just hang on to this shithole. I'm having anxiety attacks and have taken my meds for the first time in over a year. We know a few people who rent in the area so we are asking them to ask their landlords if they have any other properties. We are also going to drive around town and look for signs.
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May 27, 2013 01:55
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Some thoughts on saving money on groceries: 1. I think it was mentioned earlier that snacks were a problem. This is something you can potentially solve by switching to more cost-effective snacks. Popping corn (not microwave popcorn -- just the plain kernels for popping) is super-cheap, as are big bags of flour. Instead of getting your kids to get jobs to pay their way, you could tell them that you can't afford to buy snacks any more, but will supply them with all the oil, flour and unpopped popcorn they can eat. Some ideas: cheese scones, pretzels, cookies, pizza rolls, homemade granola bars. As someone else mentioned, go ask in Goons with 2. It's a bit late, as you will probably be moving into an apartment, but you could also consider trying to grow some of your food yourself. It's a bit of work, and it will in no way replace grocery shopping, but in a big rural house you could probably grow a ton of vegetables (and potatoes and corn). It might be a way to "employ" your kids. If this presents itself as an option once you're settled, come and check out the vegetable gardening megathread. Otherwise the rest of the thread seems to be giving you good advice. Oh, and don't stress too much about the possibility of ending up homeless -- apparently your situation is not too uncommon, and there are ways to negotiate for more time on the foreclosure: http://www.loansafe.org/how-long-can-i-stay-in-my-home-after-foreclosure LoanSafe posted:I’ve seen some homeowners over the years negotiate 30 days, 60 days and sometimes 90 days of free rent with their mortgage servicer in order to buy time to move out to another property. Often it is just a couple weeks that your servicer will give you. I’ve also seen some homeowners negotiate cash for keys. This is when your mortgage servicer will give you money to leave fast and possibly before the sale. Sometimes these checks can be as high as $1,000 and even $3,000. http://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/free-books/foreclosure-book/chapter9-4.html Some lawyer on nolo.com posted:GETTING PAID TO MOVE OUT VOLUNTARILY
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May 27, 2013 02:10
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LoveMeDead posted:I'm not trying to justify it, I'm terrified of being homeless. It feels safer to just hang on to this shithole. I'm having anxiety attacks and have taken my meds for the first time in over a year. I honestly think that finding a new home needs to be your top priority for the next couple of weeks. But you're still going to have to take a cold, hard look at your budget even when you find a new home because unless you can identify what got you to this point (it wasn't just the house) you're very likely to find yourself in the same situation again even after your house has been sold and any deficiency has been rolled into bankruptcy. "Clean slates" don't work for any length of time unless you are able to change your relationship with money, so doing that needs to be a top priority once you find a new home and it's going to involve making some tough choices and sticking to them.
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May 27, 2013 02:12
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Lead out in cuffs posted:Some thoughts on saving money on groceries: Wait, so we don't need to be out by the time of the auction? Will people be allowed to walk through the house on the auction date? And they might pay us to get out? I suddenly feel a bit better. My husband will call the lawyer Tuesday and see what our options are. We do have gardens in large pots. We live in a rural area, but in town so we don't have land or anything. My oldest is in charge of the garden and he has so far planted 4 different hot pepper plants. I'm trying to talk him into tomatoes, beans, and other useful plants. I have a brown thumb, so it's best if he handles it.
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May 27, 2013 02:19
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LoveMeDead posted:Wait, so we don't need to be out by the time of the auction? Will people be allowed to walk through the house on the auction date? And they might pay us to get out? I suddenly feel a bit better. My husband will call the lawyer Tuesday and see what our options are. When your husband talks with the lawyer who is handling the foreclosure, ask about any obligations you might have to co-operate in the sales process - not just whether you need to allow prospective buyers access, but also whether you need to allow building inspectors and the like access. If you do have an obligation to allow access, you might be able to negotiate an "open home" for all prospective purchasers rather than them being given access individually at different times. If you already have an auction date, see if you can hunt up the ad for the auction. It may well contain information regarding prospective buyers viewing the property prior to the auction and the date on which vacant possession is expected. Is the auction going to be on-site at your property? It's also possible (perhaps even likely given the state it's in) that the property will not sell at auction. Lolie fucked around with this message at 02:50 on May 27, 2013 |
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May 27, 2013 02:34
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Usually when a bank forecloses they evict right away if the property isn't vacant. I would have to check the Tennessee laws on that though. OP, I work at Wells Fargo Home Mortgage within default foreclosure, who is your mortgage through? I may be able to get you the number for the attorney you need to call on Tuesday when I get back to work. You're going to have to work really fast if you want to do a Deed in Lieu or something similar, although with the known problems on your property there is a really good chance that you will be denied for it. The bank usually only does DILs and other turn in the keys and walk away (with a five year mark on your credit) if the house is in good condition and in a marketable area. Neither of which seem to apply to your property presently. Call the foreclosure attorney and the bank ASAP on Tuesday.
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May 27, 2013 02:47
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The mortgage is through Nationstar. We will call the attorney first thing Tuesday morning. My husband has an appointment with a bankruptcy attorney Tuesday afternoon, but I don't know what is going to come of that right now. We got the letter on Thursday, but were kind of in shock and I worked Thursday and Friday night we we didn't get a chance to discuss it until yesterday. I kind of went in to panic mode. Thank you everyone for your help and advice. My husband is going to talk to a few people he works with tonight about finding a house. We don't go grocery shopping until Friday, so we'll see how that goes. My kids seem to be on board with being creative with snacks. I may still be buying a little bit of convenience food (yogurts and such) for work, but will continue to mostly bring leftovers. Cutting sodas will be the hardest part, but we really don't drink that much to begin with.
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May 27, 2013 03:17
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almightyerin posted:Water is SO expensive here in Tennessee for some reason. My last place with city water had bills well over $100 each month. I pay about $15 a month combined for water and sewer in Nashville. Where the hell are you paying $100+ a month?
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May 27, 2013 03:25
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DJCobol posted:I pay about $15 a month combined for water and sewer in Nashville. Where the hell are you paying $100+ a month? The OP is in a rural area which means they may need to have water delivered on a regular basis. Even town water can be expensive in areas where there's not a lot of rainfall and the catchment and treatment facilities aren't great. It would still be good to get an idea of how much water they're using, though. People moving to rural areas often think they're being careful with water when they're not and in areas where water is a scarce resource it's often priced to discourage excess use. Some hard numbers about how many gallons of water they're using per month and how many kwh of electricity would help determine whether their use is way above normal (most utilities companies have online calculators which allow you to compare your household's use to the average for your area) and how much room there is for reducing those costs. Lolie fucked around with this message at 04:13 on May 27, 2013 |
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May 27, 2013 03:31
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LoveMeDead posted:The mortgage is through Nationstar. We will call the attorney first thing Tuesday morning. My husband has an appointment with a bankruptcy attorney Tuesday afternoon, but I don't know what is going to come of that right now. We got the letter on Thursday, but were kind of in shock and I worked Thursday and Friday night we we didn't get a chance to discuss it until yesterday. I kind of went in to panic mode. Was the letter that you got stating the date of the auction the only correspondence that you received from either the bank or the foreclosure attorney regarding your delinquency? I know it's not much, but they have to send you certain letters at certain days past due - if you didn't receive them it can slow the foreclosure process somewhat as they have to send that letter to you again. (although if the attorney is worth their poo poo they wouldn't be scheduling a foreclosure sale if not all parties had been notified of intent to foreclose...)
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May 27, 2013 04:55
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Nereid posted:Was the letter that you got stating the date of the auction the only correspondence that you received from either the bank or the foreclosure attorney regarding your delinquency? I know it's not much, but they have to send you certain letters at certain days past due - if you didn't receive them it can slow the foreclosure process somewhat as they have to send that letter to you again. I'm sure we got other letters, my husband gets the mail and keeps track of it. He didn't tell me about it if we did. That's the kind of things I mean about him ignoring problems.
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May 27, 2013 05:18
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LoveMeDead posted:I'm sure we got other letters, my husband gets the mail and keeps track of it. He didn't tell me about it if we did. That's the kind of things I mean about him ignoring problems. I see. Well you should try and get a hold of those letters. You might be assigned a single rep who is supposed to be handling your case. I would see if there is a specific person you should be getting in touch with. The foreclosure attorney could also probably point you in the right direction.
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May 27, 2013 05:30
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You mentioned that you're on the title to the house but not the mortgage. Are you simple joint tenants on the title? You really, really need to find out what other correspondence your husband might have been ignoring. Do you have any idea what's showing on either of your credit reports at the moment? Before you try to plan your best financial options, you need to know your true financial situation - there may be other things your husband has neglected to mention. It's also probably time for you to collect and "keep track of" the mail if your husband doing so leads to you not knowing about major problems being imminent.
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May 27, 2013 05:42
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LoveMeDead posted:We know a few people who rent in the area so we are asking them to ask their landlords if they have any other properties. We are also going to drive around town and look for signs.
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May 27, 2013 12:47
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LoveMeDead posted:He needed a career change and wants to do something with computers. I know he's done research and talked to people about it, but I'll admit I'm not 100% sure what it is he's majoring in. He wants to do IT work, but can't find anyplace that will hire with just certifications, everyone wants a degree. edit: Also have him look at the following threads and ask questions - http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3303022 http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3521165 http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3447793
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May 27, 2013 15:40
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Dik Hz posted:Have you checked Craigslist? I've rented houses the size you're looking for in the rural south off of craigslist with good results before. We found one possibility off of Craigslist. There isn't much info on the listing, just "3bd, 1br 2000sqfeet" but we called and left a message. We'll try calling again today. Cicero posted:Ok. CompE is a good degree, but CS (also good) is probably closer to IT work, albeit overkill, if he wants to do sysadmin-type stuff. Just make sure that whatever he does, he does some kind of part-time work/internships during school. Getting hired with just a degree is way harder than with a degree + a little bit of entry-level experience. I'll have him check those out. He likes computers and is good with them, and it is one of the fields that is projected to grow over the next 10 years. Thanks.
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May 27, 2013 17:48
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If he wants to do IT specifically, he may not need to even do a CS degree. Many schools offer a degree in IT which is considerably easier than CS. That said, IT jobs are not as plentiful or as well-paying as CS jobs. Take that for what it's worth.
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May 27, 2013 17:53
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Nether Postlude posted:If he wants to do IT specifically, he may not need to even do a CS degree. Many schools offer a degree in IT which is considerably easier than CS. That said, IT jobs are not as plentiful or as well-paying as CS jobs. Take that for what it's worth. I was just telling him about the links and he said he doesn't want to do IT, he wants to do computer engineering. He wants to deal with hardware and building systems, not software. I can navigate a computer, but can never remember what RAM does so I frequently get confused by what he is talking about.  I guess I'm not the one that needs to understand. He can't start an IV, so we're even there.
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May 27, 2013 17:58
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LoveMeDead posted:And we need to figure out how much we can afford in rent. There are two places we found, one is $525 a month and the other is $800. The cheaper one only has one bathroom and is further away from the kid's school. In order to afford the $525/month place you will need to spend around $1,200 less than what you spent in may.
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May 28, 2013 00:34
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LoveMeDead posted:I'm also a very giving person and tend to be too generous. I'm working on that and have gotten much better. Sounds like you're making some decent choices OP, or at least you're aware of the bad ones, and so I hope it works out. However, when you say you tend to be "too generous," does that mean you're buying gifts for people? Not saying you are or aren't, but I see this come up in similar threads, and it is an instant forum rage generator because buying gifts for people is almost always A) catastrophically stupid and B) usually predicated entirely on misplaced feelings of obligation. Tell us you're doing the sensible thing and telling relatives and friends to gently caress off.
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May 28, 2013 01:21
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Mandals posted:Sounds like you're making some decent choices OP, or at least you're aware of the bad ones, and so I hope it works out. However, when you say you tend to be "too generous," does that mean you're buying gifts for people? Not saying you are or aren't, but I see this come up in similar threads, and it is an instant forum rage generator because buying gifts for people is almost always A) catastrophically stupid and B) usually predicated entirely on misplaced feelings of obligation. Tell us you're doing the sensible thing and telling relatives and friends to gently caress off. I don't buy people things out of obligation, I buy them things because I think they will like them. For example, my closest friend collects pink poodles so whenever I see anything with pink poodles I want to buy it for her. I have forced myself to stop and now just take pictures and text them to her. I've realized that it means just as much to her to know I was thinking of her as it does when I buy her weird stuff. On the other hand, I gave a friend $20 today because she just had to leave her husband and has literally nothing for a week. She didn't ask, but her daughter's only pair of shoes broke while we were walking around. The $20 is an improvement, a year ago if I had $1100 in my account I probably would have given her $100. And taken them to buy new shoes. This is a good friend who has done many things for me in the past, so I guess I feel obligated. People don't ask me for things, I enjoy giving people stuff. I've transitioned to doing things for people (babysitting, helping to clean, etc) rather than buying things. I do give away stuff I already have quite often. But if I already have it and am not using it, I don't see this as a problem. Applebee123 posted:In order to afford the $525/month place you will need to spend around $1,200 less than what you spent in may. I know. It's scary. On paper, we should absolutely be able to do it. My husband and I have already come up with plans to decrease our grocery bill. With summer coming up and the kids being home all of the time it will be especially tough. He's calling tomorrow to cancel his life insurance, and we will not be eating out any more. I'm also going to try to pick up some more shifts at work to make sure I'm getting overtime.
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May 28, 2013 02:08
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LoveMeDead posted:I know. It's scary. On paper, we should absolutely be able to do it. My husband and I have already come up with plans to decrease our grocery bill. With summer coming up and the kids being home all of the time it will be especially tough. He's calling tomorrow to cancel his life insurance, and we will not be eating out any more. I'm also going to try to pick up some more shifts at work to make sure I'm getting overtime. Sounds like you have the right attitude OP, now just dig deep for the will to follow through with it.
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May 28, 2013 03:15
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LoveMeDead posted:schools down here are lovely As someone born, raised, and currently living in Tennessee it is really pissing me off to see a person who is clearly an idiot and champion at bad choices looking down their nose at the schools here. I don't know what area you're in, but my county school system does a hell of a lot with a very small amount of money so you can just gently caress right off with that attitude. I hope you get out of my state ASAP. In the meantime, have you looked at Local Sales Network for rentals? More people use it than Craigslist around here, but there may or may not be anything available in your area. http://www.golsn.com/listings/real_estate/rentals-roommates/
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May 28, 2013 06:02
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Everything Burrito posted:As someone born, raised, and currently living in Tennessee it is really pissing me off to see a person who is clearly an idiot and champion at bad choices looking down their nose at the schools here. I don't know what area you're in, but my county school system does a hell of a lot with a very small amount of money so you can just gently caress right off with that attitude. I hope you get out of my state ASAP. Sorry to offend you. The schools in middle TN in areas we can afford are pretty bad. The school system we are currently in is pretty good, and I would like to stay in it. Thanks for the link.
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May 28, 2013 07:16
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LMD, you missed a couple of questions. Do you have a budget for June and can you post it? Do you have an emergency fund of at least $1000 sitting in a savings account? TouchyMcFeely fucked around with this message at 13:54 on May 28, 2013 |
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May 28, 2013 12:31
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TouchyMcFeely posted:Do you have an emergency fund of at least $1000 sitting in a savings account? I'm gonna go with no on this. But yeah, LoveMeDead, post a budget.
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May 28, 2013 13:44
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TouchyMcFeely posted:LMD, you missed a couple of questions. We do not have an emergency fund, and we should. We've talked about it. Here is our budget for June. Rent: 800 Auto insurance : 179 Auto payment $279 Gas: $250 Internet $59 Utilities $350 Student loan $47 Netflix/Hulu: @25 Groceries: 700 Past medical bills: $100 Personal care: $100 Transfer: $200 (our son's SSI goes into our account so we transfer his $200 every month) Clothing: $75 Our average income is about $4000 over the past few months. This leaves about $650 we should be bringing in over budget. I feel like banging my head into a wall right now. What the gently caress have we been doing? Would it be worth it to spend $69 on a rental finder service? There is one that serves our area, but we have to pay. We are having so much trouble finding a rental place, even widening our area to search in.
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May 28, 2013 16:10
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LoveMeDead posted:I was just telling him about the links and he said he doesn't want to do IT, he wants to do computer engineering. He wants to deal with hardware and building systems, not software. I can navigate a computer, but can never remember what RAM does so I frequently get confused by what he is talking about. You guys probably need to discuss this more. Without really understanding what he specifically wants to do, computer engineering is not what you have been describing. Computer engineering focuses on physical hardware design: microprocessor design, silicon systems design, etc. However, a fair portion of computer engineering requires software development, which is one of the primary means of microprocessor design. Think of it more as a hybrid of electrical engineering and computer science with a focus on microprocessors and silicon systems. If he wants to be a computer engineer, then he wants to be designing the next CPU architecture or developing the new North Bridge controller for next gen motherboards, or designing motherboard systems, etc. There are also several drawbacks to Computer Engineering. The first is that it is a low growth industry; while it is certainly growing, its growth is slower than the global talent pool. The job outlook for when he would finally graduate will be significantly different than how it looks right now, and is likely only going to deteriorate (there are many technical reasons for this). The second is that job opportunities are very geographically limited compared to many other professions. Additionally, it is an extremely rigorous program and many schools have very low graduation rates compared to entry rates. Being 'good at computers' has no bearing on your success as a Computer Engineering student. Over the course of your studies, you will need to be extremely excellent at advanced math, proficient at software, and well versed in principles of logic. The good thing about Computer Engineering is that is covers a diverse skillset that transfers well to other sectors if finding a job is difficult. You will be able to go after electrical engineering roles as well as software roles, as you will likely have touched both to a high degree. Honestly, without more information, I find it very hard for this to be a revenue positive decision, especially this late in the game. I understand that people want to Do What They Love™, but is this really a quality decision? Has he fully explored hobbyist level interest in this field first before committing to this financial burden at the same time your kids are going to be doing the same? It almost sounds more or less like a mid-life crisis.
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May 28, 2013 18:07
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archangelwar posted:You guys probably need to discuss this more. Without really understanding what he specifically wants to do, computer engineering is not what you have been describing. It is totally a mid-life crisis. I've already had to talk him out of buying a motorcycle. He knows what he wants to do and has discussed it with a career counselor and the adviser at his college. I'm just confused on the specifics because computers are magical machines where I can chart at work and check facebook at home. We are looking in to other options for him that don't involve more debt. He refuses to go back to restaurant management, and I back him on this. The emotional toll and the lovely pay for 50+ hours a week isn't worth it.
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May 28, 2013 18:22
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LoveMeDead posted:It is totally a mid-life crisis. I've already had to talk him out of buying a motorcycle. Please tell me it is not an online university (unless it is a program similar to CMU or Stanford).
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May 28, 2013 18:28
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You should read, and have your husband read, everything archangelwar said about 50 times because it is spot on. I have a degree in CPE and I would strongly reiterate some of arch's points: * Computer engineering is very difficult to learn even for young people. It is only going to be harder as you get older. * Most of the people in my college took 5 or 6 years to graduate (actually most dropped out, but the ones that didn't took over 4 years). * Computer Science or any of the less-formal degrees (i mean like MIS or IT or whatever the various colleges have) will be easier, cheaper, faster, and have a FAR better return on investment for someone in middle age. Even for someone younger they will probably have a better ROI. * From personal experience, I always have felt that having a computer engineering degree is kind of weird because it is a hybrid program with very few companies specifically looking for it. I pretty much always have to explain to people that "it's basically have electrical engineering and half computer science" which is not a good thing to have to do. I think it will be very challenging for someone at mid life and from a completely different background to complete a computer engineering program. I think it would be much easier to complete one of the more "top level" type programs like MIS or even CS, and the job and lifetime salary prospects would be relatively similar considering you can't have a 40 year career at this point. It's also possible that when you use the term computer engineering, you actually mean something more like what I'm describing... I'm not sure how homogeneous the term is from college to college (it wasn't when I started at school like 15 years ago). Either way it seems like you should probably take more of a detailed interest in what your husband is going to do so you can help him make a decision that works well for him and you and your kids.
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May 28, 2013 20:00
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Alright, I gotta reply. First off, your husband needs to be contacting people in the industry he wants to enter to get advice. Not lovely university career advisers that usually have poo poo and outdated advice ( and of course they'll suggest getting schooling, that's their business). If the school is some poo poo like ITT tech, then ABORT MISSION. After he looks up industry blogs and contacts some people, then he can make a more informed decision about what to study. And stop thinking in either or terms of him studying Computer engineering or working as a restaurant manager. There are many other things he can do, including getting a second job. I don't want to downplay him getting schooling to get a better career, but make sure you both keep in mind that ageism in the workforce is a real thing, and some industries are worse than others about it. No point in getting a degree and then not getting a job. Consider all your options, including trade schools, since it will cost less in schooling and take less time, and people always need plumbers, etc. All said, y'all need money right now, and there's not much you can cut except the rent ( I'm assuming the amount there is what you pay now, so you'll look for a cheaper place), and food. You are in a tough position, so you need to eat in survival mode. It'll suck, but you need to cut it down to bare essentials, no snacks, no extra, using super-simple (and small) meals. See if either you or your husband can bring in any little extra money by doing work online (amazon mechanical Turk is an option). As for your kids, see if they can get any waivers for their ap tests and SATs so you don't have to pay for them. My school had them available, so have them ask their guidance counselor about it. And make sure they do what they can to get scholarships. Have them join what clubs they can afford, get good test scores, and apply for every bullshit scholarship they can. And when you talk to that bankruptcy lawyer, maker sure you find out how that'll affect you getting loans for their schooling, or if they'll need to take the loans in their name. You'll need to talk with your kids about how they'll be affording school and give them time to plan accordingly. Anyway, sorry if any of this seems obvious, but I wish you the best of luck.
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May 28, 2013 20:13
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LoveMeDead posted:We do not have an emergency fund, and we should. We've talked about it. Did you forget to include the $100 you pay to your husband's parents for your cell phones in this budget? Also, you mentioned that one reason your gas costs so much is the second car which your son uses to get to and from school. Do you anticipate the amount being spent on gas dropping over the summer holidays?
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May 28, 2013 21:42
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You had mentioned your husbands life insurance was $69/m. How old is he and are there health problems or have you already dropped that. If hes in good health you should really get new quotes on a new term policy. Also if you arn't upside down on your car you should really sell it and buy something way cheaper.
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May 28, 2013 22:13
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archangelwar posted:Please tell me it is not an online university (unless it is a program similar to CMU or Stanford). It is a 4 year technical college. He doesn't like online programs (he tried something a few years ago). He's going to take the advice and try contacting people. He wants to build computers and computer systems (his words). Lolie posted:Did you forget to include the $100 you pay to your husband's parents for your cell phones in this budget? His parents are letting us stop paying for cell phones for a few months. They can afford to cover it for a couple of months and it's how they are helping us out. Gas should drop, we won't be paying the $84 for school lunches, but our grocery bill might increase during the summer. Don Lapre posted:You had mentioned your husbands life insurance was $69/m. How old is he and are there health problems or have you already dropped that. He is going to call and drop or change his life insurance. His dad and sister sold life insurance about 10 years ago and set him up. It's for $500k for some reason. I guess they wanted to make sure I wouldn't be moving in with them if he died. We just bought the car in November, I doubt we would be able to sell it for what we owe.
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May 28, 2013 22:32
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yoyomama posted:Alright, I gotta reply. First off, your husband needs to be contacting people in the industry he wants to enter to get advice. Not lovely university career advisers that usually have poo poo and outdated advice ( and of course they'll suggest getting schooling, that's their business). If the school is some poo poo like ITT tech, then ABORT MISSION. After he looks up industry blogs and contacts some people, then he can make a more informed decision about what to study. And stop thinking in either or terms of him studying Computer engineering or working as a restaurant manager. There are many other things he can do, including getting a second job. I don't want to downplay him getting schooling to get a better career, but make sure you both keep in mind that ageism in the workforce is a real thing, and some industries are worse than others about it. No point in getting a degree and then not getting a job. Consider all your options, including trade schools, since it will cost less in schooling and take less time, and people always need plumbers, etc. The rent is our estimate of what we will need to pay. We haven't been paying anything. We are going to do some cutting to our grocery budget, it has been $900 a month, so dropping it to $700 is a big cut. I'm working 5 shifts next week, so that will boost that paycheck. 20 hours of overtime. I'm going to pick up extra shifts where I can. What is Amazon mechanical Turk? We make too much for waivers. We've tried. The kids are in a lot of clubs and the 17 year old is already researching scholarships. He's in JROTC, so he's only looking at schools that have ROTC so he can get that scholarship. The bankruptcy lawyer said that bankruptcy does not affect education loans. So they (and we) will still be eligible for loans. I was hoping to go to grad school soon (online so I would keep working full time), and I'm afraid of putting that off. It would be for Family Nurse Practitioner, so there is a definite return on that investment. I'm just so stressed out and overwhelmed. The lawyer suggested filing Chapter 7 and just starting with a clean slate. It wouldn't wipe my student loans, and wouldn't affect getting new loans. It sounds tempting but I don't know.
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May 28, 2013 22:39
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