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Dickey Butts
Feb 3, 2008

Sometimes I doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion.
I've got to see the Bolognese just to watch my girlfriend's head explode when you don't get it JUST RIGHT!

Edit: Why are you using canned cabbage? Fresh Napa should be available pretty much anywhere in the states and will have a much less sloppy texture, plus it's gotta be cheaper.

Edit 2: Some of the cabbage hate is forgiven, since you used some Frank Black (plus it's a cover of an Elvis song for bonus points).

Dickey Butts fucked around with this message at 11:06 on Oct 1, 2013

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Renzuko
Oct 10, 2012


I would understand the canned cabbage hate if he was outright eating the cabbage but he was turning it into a slurry with the shrimp, I can't imagine that it would have made that much of a difference.

And I'm gonna vote beef stew because I want beef stew now...

Arglebargle III
Feb 21, 2006

I think canned cabbage is so bad because you can get them fresh all year anywhere. They're a year-round vegetable. There's no reason to eat canned cabbage unless you're on a submarine or something.

EntranceJew
Nov 5, 2009

Arglebargle III posted:

I think canned cabbage is so bad because you can get them fresh all year anywhere. They're a year-round vegetable. There's no reason to eat canned cabbage unless you're on a submarine or something.

This was my main source of confusion, cabbage is nearly always available fresh -- I wouldn't even think to look for it in a can.

Monkey Fracas
Sep 11, 2010

...but then you get to the end and a gorilla starts throwing barrels at you!
Grimey Drawer

EntranceJew posted:

This was my main source of confusion, cabbage is nearly always available fresh -- I wouldn't even think to look for it in a can.

Didn't even know it came in a can, huh. Unless it's some variety of sauerkraut.

Mico
Jan 29, 2011

A billion dollars.
I didn't want to buy a whole cabbage for basically what amounted to a spoonful. Produce is pretty perishable and I have a thing about trying not to waste food.

Arglebargle III
Feb 21, 2006

I get that. Everyone should know, though, cabbage is a surprisingly versatile vegetable. You can eat it raw or cook it to death and it will be pretty good either way or any way in between. It's particularly good in stir fry. I say surprising because in my family the tradition is to boil anything remotely vegetable until it's bitter mush. I didn't realize things like cabbage or spinach or broccoli could have a texture other than slime. I used to even turn down cooked carrots because I thought cooking meant liquifying. If you have a similar history with vegetables, you should give cabbage (and really everything leafy and green) another try.

Dickey Butts
Feb 3, 2008

Sometimes I doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion.
I can get not wanting to waste a whole head for a teaspoon, but for other people attempting this, I'd stress trying to buy a small head of cabbage. It's as Argle said, a very versatile vegetable, and if you shred it raw, mix it with a little hot sauce, vinegar and oil (salt and pepper to taste, of course) it makes a killer topping to any fish tacos. And yes, will knock out in a stir fry. I guess I'm just used to trying to use up what I have in the fridge from having a poor people complex :shobon: so I forget some people aren't trying to constantly figure out how to use that last piece of sausage with spring onions that are on the edge or whatever.

Ramengank
Jun 11, 2010
But Mico, if you bought a whole head of cabbage you could've given us a bonus recipe for coleslaw. After all, cooking is all about making extra work for yourself in a desperate attempt to make use of all your perishables at once, right?

But coleslaw is easy to make and a delicious side dish. Probably my favorite cabbage-related food. Goes great with chickencheese


EDIT: vvv :(

Ramengank fucked around with this message at 18:35 on Oct 1, 2013

Mico
Jan 29, 2011

A billion dollars.
gently caress.

Coleslaw.


That's all I have to say on the matter.

EntranceJew
Nov 5, 2009

Mico posted:

gently caress.

Coleslaw.


That's all I have to say on the matter.

I want my slaw.

Six Of Spades
Oct 24, 2010

"...That too is according to my calculations."
Coleslaw's pretty gross, I hear that.

I vote for Beef Stew, as I made some myself last weekend. Make it with beer or stout for bonus happiness!

njsykora
Jan 23, 2012

Robots confuse squirrels.


Mico posted:

gently caress.

Coleslaw.


That's all I have to say on the matter.

I support the anti-coleslaw party.

IronSaber
Feb 24, 2009

:roboluv: oh yes oh god yes form the head FORM THE HEAD unghhhh...:fap:
You guys obviously haven't had good coleslaw before.

ChaosArgate
Oct 10, 2012

Why does everyone think I'm going to get in trouble?

IronSaber posted:

You guys obviously haven't had good coleslaw before.

I refuse to believe such a thing exists. :colbert:

Mico
Jan 29, 2011

A billion dollars.

IronSaber posted:

You guys obviously haven't had good coleslaw before.

I will concede that this is probably true, but even so I don't think I want to.

Dickey Butts
Feb 3, 2008

Sometimes I doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion.
Sub mayo for a little olive oil, only a little sugar, heavy on the vinegar and spices. Add lots of other veggies (I like carrot, raw zucchini and radish if I'm feeling frisky) as well as lemon juice. Let it marinate for at least an hour. Not in any way traditional, but I think it works well. Honestly it's the creamy texture that I think puts most people off. Oh, and hot sauce works really well in this combo, specifically Chipotle Cholula.

Dickey Butts fucked around with this message at 02:13 on Oct 2, 2013

cobalt impurity
Apr 23, 2010

I hope he didn't care about that pizza.

Dickey Butts posted:

Sub mayo for a little olive oil, only a little sugar, heavy on the vinegar and spices. Add lots of other veggies (I like carrot, raw zucchini and radish if I'm feeling frisky) as well as lemon juice. Let it marinate for at least an hour. Not in any way traditional, but I think it works well. Honestly it's the creamy texture that I think puts most people off. Oh, and hot sauce works really well in this combo, specifically Chipotle Cholula.

Sugar in coleslaw? :stare:

Maybe that's why you guys hate it so much. Also, votin' for meatloaf.

The Nautilus
Jul 24, 2012

HELLO
Mico's sister here again! I wanted to mention that our dad goes through at least two heads of cabbage every week making his own cole slaw. Our family is not adverse to cabbage.

Arglebargle III
Feb 21, 2006

cobalt impurity posted:

Sugar in coleslaw? :stare:

Maybe that's why you guys hate it so much. Also, votin' for meatloaf.

It's called sweet coleslaw where I come from. We recognize more than one ethnicity of coleslaw.

SirDifferential
Sep 19, 2012
Beef Stew

There's a very tasty Finnish regional meat stew recipe, called Karelian Hot Pot. That's pretty much the only stew I've ever made - will be interesting to see what stew means elsewhere.

Mico
Jan 29, 2011

A billion dollars.

The Nautilus posted:

Mico's sister here again! I wanted to mention that our dad goes through at least two heads of cabbage every week making his own cole slaw. Our family is not adverse to cabbage.

He started doing this after I moved out, you know. Three years ago.

The Nautilus
Jul 24, 2012

HELLO

Mico posted:

He started doing this after I moved out, you know. Three years ago.

Yeah I know, but it still happens. Before that we still got stuffed cabbage every once in a while.

Arglebargle III
Feb 21, 2006

Ooooh you should make hot pot I think in Japan it's called shabu shabu. What you do is you make some really spicy chili soup with beef stock and lots of beef fat, then you put it on the table over a portable burner or a hotplate in Americaland, and you toss raw food into it. Cooked food comes out! Amazing! Also you give people a pile of condiments and they make their own sauce so the guy from Arkansas can just smother everything in ketchup while you have a sesame garlic dip.

You need friends and it takes 90 minutes to eat and beer is pretty much mandatory.

VictualSquid
Feb 29, 2012

Gently enveloping the target with indiscriminate love.

Dickey Butts posted:

Sub mayo for a little olive oil, only a little sugar, heavy on the vinegar and spices. Add lots of other veggies (I like carrot, raw zucchini and radish if I'm feeling frisky) as well as lemon juice. Let it marinate for at least an hour. Not in any way traditional, but I think it works well. Honestly it's the creamy texture that I think puts most people off. Oh, and hot sauce works really well in this combo, specifically Chipotle Cholula.
Mayo? Othere veggies?There is your problem. What are you doing to those poor cabbages?
Real Cabbage Salad has only a hint of oil and vinigar. And the traditional spices, salt pepper, caraway, bacon. And maybe some onions or apples if you really want to modify the taste.

Dickey Butts
Feb 3, 2008

Sometimes I doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion.
Where I'm from (California), when you say "Cole Slaw" people immediately think of that horrid mayonnaisey stuff you get at KFC.

Missing Name
Jan 5, 2013


Dickey Butts posted:

Where I'm from (California), when you say "Cole Slaw" people immediately think of that horrid mayonnaisey stuff you get at KFC.

Ewwwwwwww. That ain't slaw, that's fertilizer. I worked at a restaurant that sold premade slaw kinda like that. No one working with me liked it, but the customers liked it because it was super runny. Boss said that attempts to make the slaw fresh made people upset, because it didn't flow like a goddamn river.

No, what tonberrytoby said. Caraway and bacon make for excellent slaw.

Pyrotoad
Oct 24, 2010


Illegal Hen
Everyone's talking about coleslaw but nobody's talking about kimchi :kimchi:

Also tossing a vote in Meatloaf's direction.

sentrygun
Dec 29, 2009

i say~
hey start:nya-sh
I've never had cole slaw that wasn't half or more mayo and it wasn't until now that I realized cole slaw could be remotely good and not just a weird and gross excuse for people to eat pretty much straight mayo.

sentrygun fucked around with this message at 03:38 on Oct 3, 2013

Dickey Butts
Feb 3, 2008

Sometimes I doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion.
The same is true for macaroni salad. (That is not an invitation to post that Wanda's macaroni salad video)

Ramengank
Jun 11, 2010

sentrygun posted:

I've never had cole slaw that wasn't half or more mayo and it wasn't until now that I realized cole slaw could be remotely good and not just a weird and gross excuse for people to eat pretty much straight mayo.

My God, is that what people were thinking of when I originally mentioned coleslaw? The idea of a "Wanda's Slaw" is horrifying.

EDIT: If it does exist don't post that video either please thank you

njsykora
Jan 23, 2012

Robots confuse squirrels.


Pyrotoad posted:

Everyone's talking about coleslaw but nobody's talking about kimchi :kimchi:

Also tossing a vote in Meatloaf's direction.

Because kimchi rules and therefore doesn't belong in this conversation about a horrible thing.

Elissia
Dec 28, 2012

Ramengank posted:

My God, is that what people were thinking of when I originally mentioned coleslaw?

Yeah, whenever I think about slaw, I think about what is basically a bowl of mayo with some shredded greens sprinkled in. I have never seen any other kind.

Glazius
Jul 22, 2007

Hail all those who are able,
any mouse can,
any mouse will,
but the Guard prevail.

Clapping Larry
Clearly what you need, Mico, is Videographer Mama, the game about taping and editing Mama's cooking show.

UZworm
Feb 9, 2009

Young wild Elsweyrian
C'mon baby, do you have a soul gem

Ramengank posted:

But Mico, if you bought a whole head of cabbage you could've given us a bonus recipe for coleslaw.

Recipe For Coleslaw:
Cabbage
Differently colored Cabbage
Carrot
Mayonnaise
Knife
Time on hands

There, now we can all make cole slaw of our own

tweet my meat
Oct 2, 2013

yospos
I'll vote for Meatloaf since it's the only one I've never cooked before.

Mico
Jan 29, 2011

A billion dollars.
Well I'm cooking Wednesday so I guess it's meatloaf.

Mico
Jan 29, 2011

A billion dollars.


Meatloaf
Adapted from the Good Eats meatloaf recipe (and also sized down because holy poo poo Alton Brown wants me to make HOW many pounds of meatloaf????)

1 and 1/4 lb ground beef
1 chopped shallot
1/2 cup breadcrumbs
1/2 tsp cayenne
1/2 tsp pepper
A sprinkle of crushed red pepper
1 and 1/2 tsp salt
1 egg
1 tsp chili powder
Some BBQ Sauce
(Optional) Soy Sauce or Honey

The instructions couldn't be simpler, really.

Prehead the oven to 400° F
Take all the poo poo and mix it together in a big bowl
Slap that meat mixture into a pyrex and form it into a meatloaf shape
Cover with the BBQ sauce as a glaze. If you like, you can mix the BBQ sauce with Soy Sauce or Honey.
Use a barbecue brush to spread the sauce around and get it nice and even.
Bake for 45 minutes.

---

Soundtrack

Chinese Man - I've Got That Tune
Yo La Tengo - Here to Fall

---

Voting:

No voting this time, I have a special halloween episode cooked up.

Haha, cooked up.

Voting resumes with the next episode.

Mico fucked around with this message at 11:12 on Oct 13, 2013

Mico
Jan 29, 2011

A billion dollars.
The youtube video got its audio muted hang on while I re-render a non musical version.

In the meantime the one on my own webspace works just fine.

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Arglebargle III
Feb 21, 2006

You are going to have to throw away so much moldy garlic. :ohdear: It only keeps well inside its skin.

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