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vyelkin posted:If the transfer window can extend into the season, I'm sure the Jozy Window can too. Maybe we could have a second Jozy Window in January for people to update their guesses, in case they're afraid of dropping out of the running. if we play FPL and Talksport Predictor will we be cup tied?
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Aug 19, 2013 01:00
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Aug 19, 2013 01:04
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I predict he will be a terrible player and will score zero (0) goals until a few months into the season at which point his form will dramatically improve and he will subsequently break all premiership scoring records. Around Christmas Real Madrid will start sniffing around but the move will fall through as he finds himself unable to repeat his earlier promising form and will soon find himself languishing in the reserves. He'll buy out his contract in May and leave the club a broken man but not before having Interflora deliver a package to Craven Cottage addressed to Clint Dempsey.
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Aug 19, 2013 01:53
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He's going to end up back in MLS within two years probably
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Aug 19, 2013 02:05
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tbp posted:He's going to end up back in MLS within two years probably 
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Aug 19, 2013 02:25
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=alMPPagnAro Jozy vs Fulham
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Aug 19, 2013 02:31
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The music was perfect for that masterpiece.
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Aug 19, 2013 02:39
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I meant that gifman could have his guess count as of today, not that there would be voting all season. Tomorrow we're done with votes
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Aug 19, 2013 03:02
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Hahaha oh man he's so bad. I think seven goals was optimistic. Bearing that in mind, probability says that at some point in the season we'll get a Poisson clump of Jozygoals, which will lead to half the posters in TRP proclaiming him the best striker since Marapelnaldo, before he regresses to the mean and resumes not scoring.
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Aug 19, 2013 03:05
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vyelkin posted:Hahaha oh man he's so bad. I think seven goals was optimistic. You should always stay true to the tar.
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Aug 19, 2013 03:07
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vyelkin posted:Hahaha oh man he's so bad. I think seven goals was optimistic. He's trying at least, 3 (three) goals this PL season.
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Aug 19, 2013 03:08
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From this evidence Jozy is an archetypal "big man" striker good at "putting himself about" and "making a nuisance of himself." Unfortunately he can't shoot for poo poo.
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Aug 19, 2013 03:20
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Jozy appears to be Real Bad at holding up the ball
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Aug 19, 2013 03:34
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i believe in harvey altidore
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Aug 19, 2013 03:35
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He has a really heavy touch. I think he'll still manage to hoof in about 8 goals I'm not in the competition.
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Aug 19, 2013 03:40
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I've just watched that first strike at 11 seconds in about a dozen times. It gets better every time.
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Aug 19, 2013 03:44
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lol jozy sucks amirite?
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Aug 19, 2013 03:50
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Wildlife Analysis posted:lol jozy sucks amirite? If his performance in Sunderland vs Fulham is anything to go by, yes he does, however we can also look to Hull City's 2009-2010 Season for similar confirmation.
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Aug 19, 2013 03:59
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jozy shevchenko
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Aug 19, 2013 04:31
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Your Weird Uncle posted:jozy shevchenko Now you've crossed a line.
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Aug 19, 2013 04:41
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Your Weird Uncle posted:jozy shevchenko are you loving off your rocker? It's Jozy McBride to you missy.
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Aug 19, 2013 04:51
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Your Weird Uncle posted:jozy shevchenko Jozy alt-torres
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Aug 19, 2013 05:13
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thompson posted:are you loving off your rocker? It's Jozy McBride to you missy. ah yes noted EPL non-goalscorer brian mcbride
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Aug 19, 2013 05:24
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Lol he is so poo poo. Touch of a rapist 2nd touch is a tackle I'm glad i can take off my USMNT glasses and judge him fairly Your Weird Uncle posted:ah yes noted EPL non-goalscorer brian mcbride Had a look at his wikipedia page i see
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Aug 19, 2013 05:34
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LOL he's unironically and literally terrible.
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Aug 19, 2013 08:27
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joshtothemaxx posted:The sight and the glory. Go Jozy Go. This picture also serves as a perfect scale to measure Eredivisie players against. Jozy: not as poo poo as Marcellis, not as good as Maher.
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Aug 19, 2013 08:30
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A lot of times where he gets space its because the defender wasnt expecting the ball to bounce 10 feet off his foot. He's hilarious to watch, like Ade Akinbiyi if he played drunk
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Aug 19, 2013 08:33
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He's like a newborn horse only big and fat and doesn't know what he's doing.
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Aug 19, 2013 08:39
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vaginal culture posted:Lol he is so poo poo. Touch of a rapist waht position is he
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Aug 19, 2013 09:09
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He got a good shot away that time when it was played into him and he turned. His touch was pretty bad though as was his ability to lay it off to his team which isn't great for a guy playing up front for a team who don't look like they'll be dominating games. I was expecting a lot more based on the US posters love for him.
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Aug 19, 2013 09:31
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I don't think his lay offs were as bad as you lot are making out. But otherwise, yeah, he's poo poo.
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Aug 19, 2013 09:42
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Holy gently caress he's unironically worse than I thought. Almost every pass is misplaced, very poor first touch and he doesn't look very agile. He had one good shot but he still needed 3 touches to make the turn.
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Aug 19, 2013 11:04
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Further to my earlier prediction and in the knowledge that this is not a recognised tiebreaker I would like to predict a Stewart Downing special; zero goals, zero assists
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Aug 19, 2013 11:14
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gently caress, was on vacation, can't believe I missed out on the Jozy challenge. Anyway, I would have guessed FOUR (4) (quatro) (four) goals, but looking at his first match I was a bit optimistic. Think Fernando Torres could easily be the top scorer in the Dutch league, maybe he should go there to regain his form.
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Aug 19, 2013 13:38
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angered paedophile posted:I was expecting a lot more based on the US posters love for him. I can't believe anyone actually rates him unironically, unless it's just for his Heskey-esque ability to get international call-ups to pad the roster on a team with exactly 4 good players.
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Aug 19, 2013 16:03
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Even though I'm past deadline, I would like to submit what he scored for the great Hull City Tigers Association Football Club. Jozy will score 1 (one) goal for Sunderland and will generally bewilder and frustrate their supporters.
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Aug 19, 2013 16:05
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Your Weird Uncle posted:waht position is he I believe he gets ball-you-man-goalside in the 14th zone
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Aug 19, 2013 16:33
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He's poo poo I'd like to withdraw my entry from your competition from sheer disgust.
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Aug 24, 2013 16:35
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Hallowed Turban posted:He's poo poo I'd like to withdraw my entry from your competition from sheer disgust. Bold move. He is truly shocking.
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Aug 24, 2013 16:44
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I think he has actually got worse than when he was at hull lol.
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Aug 24, 2013 16:46
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