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Jozy will score 13 goals.
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Aug 16, 2013 15:13
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There will be bushels of sexy Jozy Altiphwoar goals this year.
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Aug 16, 2013 18:55
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serious gaylord posted:Tbh if you'd grown up in America and then realised what cheese and bacon really are you're gonna get fat too. As an American and someone that predicted an absurdly high number of goals, my feelings have been hurt so many times in this thread, but this post cuts the deepest of all. Our bacon is delicious god drat it.
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Sep 7, 2013 22:02
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There's no Barclay's Premier League on NBC Sports featuring The Sunderland Black Cats this weekend. This seems like a perfectly appropriate conversation given these circumstances.
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Sep 8, 2013 07:42
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Johnny Cache Hit posted:I was wondering if Jozy happened to play in and score the one goal in Sunderland's 3-1 loss against Sunderland's U-21 team. Does anyone know? He's with the US team right now, so no, he did not score that goal.
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Sep 9, 2013 02:37
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I drank the Jozy kool aid and now I have dysentery.
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Oct 5, 2013 22:10
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I don't know gifman, the evidence is starting to be overwhelming.
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Oct 7, 2013 01:11
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the sex ghost posted:For every goal Jozy scores in this 2013-2014 Premier League season, I will donate 5 (just five) pounds to a charity of TRP's choosing. Jozy's Haiti water charity sounds like a good choice.
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Oct 9, 2013 19:56
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Ponce de Le0n posted:if jozy moved to turkey, i wonder if he would get the same response vassel got. He already did.
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Oct 27, 2013 00:37
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vaginal culture posted:Any Gifs of the Jozy assist for us west coast sleep havers? 
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Oct 27, 2013 19:10
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To commemorate his time there, next week Jozy will score one (1) goal against Hull.
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Oct 27, 2013 19:46
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Taff posted:Man of the match. I may have to start a separate chart for this, any real football men know a mans performance to the team is more important than individual merits like goals. That was a really versatile performance from Jozy. He was asked to do a lot of things today and did really well I thought. Played a part in two goals. Good hold up play. Good game. There aren't a lot of players in the league that you can tell to go give Tiote hell, and they get it done. I can't think of another forward off the top of my head. Maybe Rooney, although he doesn't have Jozy's size, which to me is what was giving Tiote trouble. T. Finninho posted:That replay is the reverse angle, it's even clearer on the proper angle as he never once had his head up or had any awareness that Borini is near him. He's watching it into his feet all the way and still fucks up the touch, thankfully it rolls to an actual striker the bad touch argument is getting relly old and annoying. do you guys remember jozys assist against PSV where they won 3-0 (cant find a video). he controlled the ball and gave a very good reverse pass, guess what, everyone said it was a bad touch. you always have to give the payer benefit of doubt, you cant read his mind, imo it wasnt an intentional pass but he seemed to want to control the ball turn and maybe pass or shoot but when he saw borini coming at it he left it. not a bad touch of any kind. Scott Bakula posted:I'm not sure whats worse. Jozy loving up so badly it led to Sunderland scoring or just scoring himself It’s is frustrating watching Altidore play for Sunderland knowing he would be perfect playing with Ben Arfa and Remy as part of a front 3.
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Oct 27, 2013 20:08
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Pissflaps posted:Jozy has the touch of a rapist and would look poo poo whoever he was playing with and for because he is a poo poo footballer and needs to gently caress off immediately. I'm actually every American. those are all posts from American soccer boards today defending Jozy from these types of statements
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Oct 27, 2013 20:19
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Were either of Sunderland's goals from deft one touch Jozy assists?
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Nov 6, 2013 23:14
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Gigi Galli posted:He's poo poo and a diver. That doesn't rule him out for being the best USMNT striker in the PL though.
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Nov 7, 2013 16:13
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Our friends at Big Soccer haven't given up hope, it's still definitely not his fault. These are all within the past 24 hours. quote:I'm starting to change my tune about Altidore's time with Sunderland. After watching his brief appearance today, I have changed the blame from Altidore to the team that he plays for, IMO. quote:I'd be curious how someone like Van Persie would do on this team. I'd wager he'd have a tough time breaking 10. quote:He hasn't threatened the goal because he doesn't get chances. Strikers that can't create on their own can't score ten goals with 5 chances. He is a striker that needs service to score goals, and he hasn't gotten that necessary service. How many good chances has he gotten this season? It can't be more than four or five. Tons of strikers miss four or five good chances in a row. For most strikers, thats called a bad game. Unfortunately for Altidore, thats a bad three months with Sunderland. He doesn't get proper service. quote:Whoever is defending Sunderland and accusing Jozy of not doing enough, you do realize Sunderland is the worst team in the Prem right? Hell, they might even be terrible in the Championship. Put Jozy on a team that plays actual football like Arsenal, Liverpool, Swansea, or even SoTo and he would be bagging goals.
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Nov 13, 2013 00:07
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Pissflaps posted:Did somebody, somewhere use the abbreviations 'SoTo' for Southampton? They did.
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Nov 13, 2013 00:27
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Gifman?
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Dec 4, 2013 21:16
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No we disowned his Benedict Arnold rear end. #trader
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Dec 7, 2013 22:08
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pissy smelliott posted:weird I don't see his shorts coming down and we're the racists?
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Dec 23, 2013 19:51
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Pissflaps posted:A challenge to Jozy fans: explain in what way Jozy isn't utterly irredeemable dogturd because his record suggests he is. He's the pits. A real stinker. He kicks the ball really hard and it goes past poo poo Jamaican players into the goal, which allows our country, the United States of America, to participate in the World Cup. That's not really an argument against him being dogturd, or the pits, or a real stinker, but it explains why we love him so.
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Dec 25, 2013 05:05
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 Jozy is a good lad
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Dec 27, 2013 00:04
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blue footed boobie posted:Nice goal that yeah those words will never be uttered here
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Dec 28, 2013 18:38
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I read perhaps my favorite explanation for Jozy's goal scoring struggles: "Jozy just has way too much composure upfront, he has this tendency to delay his shot and tends to take a touch too many upfront giving away chances."
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Jan 1, 2014 19:22
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oh em gee bee ess posted:Source that quote. as always, Big Soccer
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Jan 1, 2014 19:53
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NeoNaoNeo posted:There was some quote in this topic recently about how Jozy wasn't doing that badly when there have been other terrible signings. One listed was Wilfried Bony, who scored the same number of goals today in 45 minutes that Jozy has scored in 45 premier league games swap teams and they swap stats, simple as that.
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Jan 1, 2014 21:07
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Pissflaps posted:lol oops Jozy can't pass
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Jan 5, 2014 18:11
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Jan 8, 2014 02:14
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Jan 18, 2014 13:19
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 oh dear
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Jan 26, 2014 16:05
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I so, so hope that he is NYCFC's first dp. They're probably too smart for that though.
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Jan 31, 2014 02:56
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Stinky Pit posted:Hahaha that guy was a complete turd in the total embarrassment that is the Mexican Primera I'll be amazed if he manages a single goal for Sunderland. The posters at Grande Futbol will blame Larsson and Johnson.
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Jan 31, 2014 17:37
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Jozy proves that you don't need assists to be an assister but he is an assister.
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Feb 1, 2014 20:39
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lol he loving retweeted this
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Feb 3, 2014 02:49
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tbp posted:our men on the ground Jozy infected them, hasn't he.
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Feb 12, 2014 14:22
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jyrka posted:Even though he didn't score today and only came off the bench, it looks like Connor Wickham is ready to take Jozy's place in the first eleven. Not scoring for Sunderland is in fact Jozy's place in the first 11, so you might be right.
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Feb 15, 2014 19:28
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It's a real BigSoccer post.
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Feb 22, 2014 20:48
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Ho Chi Meeeeee posted:I think if Jozy Altidore scores the winning goal against Manchester City every Manchester City poster has to get Jozy Altidore avs. I think if that happens, this forum should be The Jozy Trophy Pit for at least a week, or another title befitting such an achievement of athletic excellence.
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Feb 23, 2014 04:33
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He won't be completely anonymous, you'll see him huffing and puffing and throwing a fit towards his teammates quite a lot I'll bet.
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Mar 1, 2014 18:48
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| # ¿ Apr 19, 2024 06:50 |
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quote:This is devastating, have been waiting for weeks for Jozy’s chance to play in this final in rockin’ Wembley. Is Jozy injured? Is he sick? If not there is one possible explanation for the snub that comes to mind. quote:Great. I don’t think Jozy has gotten a pass like that all season. Borini scores and may stick at the striker spot. I think Gus only sees Jozy and Fletcher as a big, hold up player that have to play isolated hold up play. He puts little guys like Borini and Scocco in and lets them run in space facing goal as part of a unified front three. I don’t think Poyet watched any tape of Jozy at AZ. That kind of pass and play is exactly the type of service Jozy got at AZ and hasn’t gotten at Sunderland. Ugh, this is not good. quote:Soccer is stupid and a complete waste of time.
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Mar 2, 2014 15:48
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