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Sixteen goals. Jozy is the best.
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# ¿ Aug 16, 2013 16:51 |
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# ¿ Mar 29, 2024 12:03 |
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vaginal culture posted:So far, and the stats bear this out (trust me - I'm a college grad) jozy is on pace to score 0 goals. Lol. Poor player. Small sample size, rear end in a top hat!
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# ¿ Aug 17, 2013 16:02 |
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Great hold-up play from Jozy today.
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# ¿ Aug 17, 2013 16:05 |
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What's the official goal count as of right now?
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# ¿ Aug 24, 2013 21:11 |
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Ponce de Le0n posted:Did jozy altidore score in the premier league today? i havent been following this thread but i heard he scored in a friendly pre-season so im looking forward to watching youtubes of his goals because he sounds like a top class player. No, he didn't score. Turns out he's an uncoordinated lumbering oaf rather than a skilled American super-athlete.
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# ¿ Aug 24, 2013 21:25 |
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Has Jozy scored yet? I know a lot of people are a bit down on him but I still think realistically he will score about 7-8 goals this season. Maybe 6 or 9. So that's my prediction.
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# ¿ Aug 27, 2013 02:01 |
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Hope he doesn't score just for the new American Sunderland fans' posts on whatever that forum is called. It's great fun.
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# ¿ Aug 27, 2013 18:03 |
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Pissflaps posted:lol jozy found his level A bit of a can't win situation for Jozy Volmy here. If he hadn't scored he'd have been poo poo and if he scored he found his level.
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# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 09:09 |
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vaginal culture posted:Jozy takes too many steps when he runs. Very short stride. poo poo technique from top to bottom. I wonder what his 5m and 30m times are.
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# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 09:09 |
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Wish I were poo poo at football and played in the Netherlands.
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# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 14:42 |
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Something I noticed on the wikipedia: Jozy - Youth career 2004–2006 IMG Soccer Academy Freddy Adu - Youth career 2002–2003 IMG Academy Wouldn't want to be IMG (Soccer) Academy right now.
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# ¿ Aug 29, 2013 07:43 |
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I think some places void the bet if the player is not starting. Might want to check your bookie, oliwan.
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# ¿ Aug 31, 2013 16:46 |
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Suddenly I'm not that interested in soccer.
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# ¿ Aug 31, 2013 17:25 |
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Can someone explain what the pun(?) in the thread title is supposed to mean? Slore? What's a slore?
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# ¿ Sep 2, 2013 12:58 |
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Pissflaps posted:Jozy needs to get into shape if he is serious about being a professional footballer. I blame American food culture. Reckon they have parmos in Sunderland?
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# ¿ Sep 7, 2013 18:40 |
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That was poo poo by the ref. I'd be absolutely furious if I were an American.
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# ¿ Sep 14, 2013 16:30 |
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Could getting Paolo sacked be considered a goal?
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# ¿ Sep 22, 2013 22:40 |
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People here always make fun how Jozy has only scored one goal in his 33 Premier League appearances but you're forgetting that he also has provided one pass that led to a goal. So who's the fat donkey now?
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# ¿ Sep 29, 2013 19:59 |
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Any Jozy fans in here?
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# ¿ Oct 6, 2013 22:37 |
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Fans rejecting their local leagues and only caring about EPL and one match in Spain is in no way unique to the USA. In fact MLS is among the 10 best supported football leagues in the world. So.
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# ¿ Oct 19, 2013 01:24 |
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oh em gee bee ess posted:Why the hell do the Americans give so many caps to people? I mean poo poo doesn't Landon Donovan have something ridiculous like 150+ caps? It happens in smaller and soccer-developing countries. For example Estonia has a shedload of 100+ cappers from the 90s when soccer was new here and only 11 people played.
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# ¿ Oct 20, 2013 17:57 |
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Koesj posted:How come 'soccer' was ever 'new' when the Soviet Union won a european championship, played in a final in 1988, all while Kiev had their golden years around then too? It was considered a Russians' game and no one local played it. Historically basketball is the Estonians' game with all the old Olympic/WC/Euros gold winning teams having several Estonians in them. Kiev is nowhere near Estonia geographically or culturally. Koesj posted:Like 40% of Estonians are ethnically Russian. I think you mean 40% of Estonian citizens, not Estonians. And it's actually below 25% according to wikipedia. Meat Wagon posted:Would Jozy get into the Estonia squad? Yeah, he'd fit right into the squad. We have 5-6 strikers who are similarly poo poo.
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# ¿ Oct 20, 2013 19:12 |
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Jozy has scored less goals for Sunderland than a balloon.
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# ¿ Nov 2, 2013 19:33 |
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Can not wait for the chart to get to the second row.
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# ¿ Nov 12, 2013 00:52 |
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Not really feeling great about my predictions of 16, 7, 8, 6 and 9 goals.
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# ¿ Nov 12, 2013 23:57 |
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Good goal by the old Joze. It's just a shame that it's going to be used as proof that he isn't poo poo by you-know-whos.
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# ¿ Dec 5, 2013 04:30 |
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What's wrong with these people? This has to be at least fifth or sixth thing written about Jozy in that tone. Are they joking? What is this poo poo?
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# ¿ Dec 22, 2013 00:55 |
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Jozy is the Babe Ruth of soccer. What I'm saying is he's fat.
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# ¿ Dec 23, 2013 22:38 |
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Imagine if Jozy had picked up basketball instead of soccer when he were a lad. Phwoar!
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# ¿ Dec 24, 2013 08:51 |
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http://www.express.co.uk/sport/football/450130/Sunderland-0-Norwich-0-Dozy-Jozy-Altidore-s-a-real-miss-for-the-fansquote:Sunderland 0 - Norwich 0: Dozy Jozy Altidore's a real miss for the fans
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# ¿ Dec 24, 2013 09:04 |
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In modern World Cups(post 1967) England's best result is a fourth place meanwhile Holland has been to three finals.
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# ¿ Dec 30, 2013 18:43 |
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Pissflaps posted:Still, both have done better than you Baltic fuckers have managed. oh em gee bee ess posted:I don't think Cascadia Offical Soccer Team are going to be winning the world cup any time tom. Fingers crossed for the Baltic - Cascadia final in 2014 then!
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# ¿ Dec 30, 2013 18:57 |
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oliwan posted:I'm not so sure how to defend Jozy anymore. Ask any premiership defender. It's really easy.
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# ¿ Jan 1, 2014 20:54 |
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Pissflaps posted:I don't understand this post. Post some posts about Jozy from bigsoccer.
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# ¿ Jan 2, 2014 19:42 |
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Why did Jozy attack that player?
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# ¿ Jan 8, 2014 23:11 |
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I hope Jozy can find a new home this month.
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# ¿ Jan 14, 2014 18:14 |
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So many new posts. I was sure Jozy had been loaned out to the Championship but instead it's more funny delusional American articles. Great stuff!
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# ¿ Jan 17, 2014 00:44 |
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How can they say that Jozy is "A solid starter on a top EPL club" when in real life he is not even "Starter on mid-, low-table EPL side or role player on top team"?
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# ¿ Jan 17, 2014 04:31 |
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These are all the shots Jozy took today:
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# ¿ Jan 18, 2014 21:18 |
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# ¿ Mar 29, 2024 12:03 |
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Here's what Sunderland fans are saying about Jozy: He,s poo poo , end of story I know it wont happen but would love to see him shipped out this month, he is a shocking excuse of a striker. Commentator on the radio said Altidore controls it further than he can kick it. Says it all really. I can honestly say I've seen better strikers in the local Sunday Leagues. His worst performance today... he couldn't even muster his mysterious flick on to nobody in front of him today. He's got nothing about him. I doubt there'd be much difference between playing him up front or playing with 10 men. What exactly does he do? He wouldn't even get in the Kidderminster side. The worst player I have seen in the red and white of Sunderland!! Actually scratch that, just the worse player I have seen...... There's just something about him. His touch and control are absolutely appalling for a premiership/international footballer. We wouldn't have noticed if he walked off in that second half He's being out scored by defenders for fucks sake mate. He has all the control of a three legged baby giraffe. AZ must be laughing all the way to the bank that they got 6mil for him, jeeeesus His second touch is a tackle Makes Whickam look like Pele The most appalling striker I have ever seen in the premier league. Don't tell me I'm wrong please, I've been moaning about this for fuvking weeks! The worst today by far against KIDDERMINSTER! For fucks sake A disgusting player. I would kill to play in a cup final for Sunderland and this arsehole will instead. What get me is his lack of movement. We were playing a non-league side and this loving lump just ran alongside their centre-halves all afternoon. I really can't be arsed to read the previous comments but today I witnessed the worst performance I have EVER seen from a Sunderland centre forward. How is the man rated? He made no effort at all to "work the channels", get on the end of a cross or make himself available for any sort of defence splitting pass or otherwise. The man is stealing a living. Thought he'd find his level today but he wasn't even that good I seriously wonder if he'd be able to cut it in a pub league, I really do. He is vile. He's terrible. I'm embarrassed for the lad now. He's beyond an unfunny joke now At one point there was a loose ball. He ran towards it, stopped, then realised he might make it so resumed running. If he hadn't stopped he would've got there. I haven't seen someone do that since I was playing football at school. He can't read the game. He has no anticipation. He has no concept of running into space. It beggars belief that he's scored so many goals at international level. mate he looks like hes never seen a football Worst thing about him - he's a diver, and it looks pathetic everytime he does it. If we built our style around that inept gonk, we'd be in the conference in 5 years. etc
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# ¿ Jan 25, 2014 23:39 |