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HUMAN FISH
Jul 6, 2003

I identify as a twinlit irl.



Hey look it's time for Survivor! This season will most likely be terrible, but let's at least give it a chance ok?

Gimmicks:
  • The cast is comprised of old survivors and their loved ones.
  • Redemption Island is back. Yeah, nobody likes it but apparently Jeff has a massive hard on for it. This season it's going to be all three person challenges.
  • Speaking of RI, the players now have the chance to switch places with their partner if the partner is voted out and is on Redemption Island. This can happen before every RI challenge, and there are no limits in how many times you can switch places. Theoretically you can try to strategize and switch a more physical player for a physical task etc etc.
  • The winner of the RI challenge gets a clue to the hidden immunity idol, which he/she can give to any player from either tribe.
  • The first elimination will happen immediately after they start the game. Both tribes will eliminate one player who will go to RI.
  • Day Zero: The survivors are dropped in pairs in separate locations and have to spend their first night alone. What's the point? I don't loving know

THE TRIBES





Aras Baskauskas (31)
Residence: Santa Monica, California
Occupation:Musician
Previous season:
Survivor: Panama Exile Island (season 12): Winner

Vytas Baskauskas (33)
Relationship to Significant Castaway: Aras’ Brother
Residence: Santa Monica, California
Occupation:Yoga instructor / math professor
Personal claim to fame:Beating a heroin addiction, yoga discipline and receiving a graduate degree in math.
Survivor Contestant Vytas is Most Like: The intellect and wit of Jonathan Penner, the likability of Aras Baskauskas and the flirtatiousness of Parvati Shallow.


Tyson Apostol (34)
Residence: Provo, Utah
Occupation: Former pro cyclist / shop manager
Previous seasons:
Survivor: Tocantins (season 18): 2nd jury member
Survivor: Heroes Vs. Villains (season 20): 6th voted out

Rachel Foulger (33)
Relationship to Significant Castaway: Tyson’s girlfriend
Residence: Provo, Utah
Occupation: Cocktail waitress / graphic designer


Rupert Boneham (49)
Residence: Indianapolis, Indiana
Occupation:Mentor for troubled teens
Personal claim to fame: Stealing shoes, being a bully, failing to be elected as the governor of Indiana.
Previous seasons:
Survivor: Pear Islands (season 7): 2nd jury member
Survivor: All-Stars (season 8): 6th jury member
Survivor: Heroes Vs. Villains (season 20): 7th jury member

Laura Boneham (44)
Relationship to Significant Castaway: Rupert’s Wife
Residence:Indianapolis, Indiana
Occupation:Merchandiser
Personal claim to fame: Raising a bright, independent, beautiful daughter who is now thirteen years old.
Why You Think You Will Be the Sole Survivor: I am a huge competitor and game player. I am a leader that can positively bond our tribe. I can fish, forage for food, and work exceptionally hard at camp.


Candice Woodcock Cody (30)
Residence: Washington, D.C.
Occupation:Physician / anesthesiology resident
Previous seasons:
Survivor: Cook Islands (season 13): 5th jury member
Survivor: Heroes Vs. Villains (season 20): 5th jury member
Personal claim to fame: Permanent resident of Exile Island.

John Cody (30)
Relationship to Significant Castaway: Candice’s Husband
Residence: Washington, D.C.
Occupation: Physician: Army Orthopedic Surgery Resident
Personal Claim to Fame: Being a West Point grad, graduating from Georgetown Medical School and training at the Walter Reed National Military Medical Center for my Orthopedic Surgery residency.
Pet Peeves: Slow thinkers, talkers, and movers, people who eat paper, illogical, irrational and inflexible people, excuses, mouth breathers.


Monica Culpepper (42)
Residence: Tampa, Florida
Occupation: Former NFL Wife, Homemaker
Previous Season: “Survivor: One World” – fifth person eliminated
Personal claim to fame: Being part of the worst season of Survivor.

Brad Culpepper (44)
Relationship to Significant Castaway: Monica’s Husband
Residence: Tampa, Florida
Occupation: Attorney and Retired NFL Player. Played for the Minnesota Vikings, Tampa Bay Buccaneers, and Chicago Bears.
Personal Claim to Fame: My 21-year marriage.
Why You Think You Will Be the Sole Survivor: I grew up in a stilt house on Dog Island in the Gulf of Mexico, spent 18 years in various locker rooms dealing with all kinds, and have devoted my last 12 years as a trial attorney, persuading people to understand my clients’ positions.


Colton Cumbie (22)
Residence: Collinsville, Alabama
Occupation: Student Teacher
Previous Season: “Survivor: One World” – medically evacuated on day sixteen due to illness.

Colton's housekeeper Caleb Bankston (26)
Relationship to Significant Castaway: Colton’s Fiancé
Residence: Collinsville, Alabama
Occupation: Post Office Manager/Farmer
Personal Claim to Fame: Shooting a 12-point buck on my first deer hunt.
Three Words to Describe You: Hard-working, hard-headed, and outdoorsman.
Why You Think You Will Be the Sole Survivor: I am very good at working with my hands, really good at figuring things out, and problem solving.


Kat Edorsson (23)
Residence: Orlando, Florida
Occupation: Full-time Student/Sales
Previous Season: “Survivor: One World” – sixth jury member
Personal claim to fame: Being suspected of being one of the two One World players who were too dumb to play the game. Playing the game again in spite of that because she's dating a BB "star".

Hayden Moss (26)
Relationship to Significant Castaway: Kat’s Boyfriend
Residence: Springtown, Texas
Occupation: Real Estate
Personal Claim to Fame: Winning “Big Brother 12.”
Why You Think You Will Be the Sole Survivor: I have already played and won a game very similar to “Survivor.”


Laura Morett (43)
Residence: Salem, Oregon
Occupation: Co-owner of Morett Construction
Previous Season: “Survivor: Samoa” – third jury member

Ciera Eastin (24)
Relationship to Significant Castaway: Laura’s Daughter
Residence: Salem, Oregon
Occupation: Cosmetology Student
Personal Claim to Fame: Despite the fact that I got pregnant at 17, I am most proud of the fact that I finished high school, worked three jobs to support my daughter, and now I am happily married with two beautiful children.


Gervase Peterson (43)
Residence: Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Occupation: Cigar Lounge Owner
Previous Season: “Survivor: Borneo” – third jury member

Marissa Peterson (21)
Relationship to Significant Castaway: Gervase’s Niece
Residence: Chapel Hill, North Carolina
Occupation: Student


Tina Wesson (52)
Current Residence: Robbinsville, North Carolina
Occupation: Motivational Speaker
Previous Season: Winner of “Survivor: The Australian Outback” and “Survivor: All Stars” – first player eliminated.
Personal claim to fame: Having the chance to be the second double winner OR the second double first boot.

Katie Collins (25)
Relationship to Significant Castaway: Tina’s Daughter
Residence: New York, New York
Occupation: Hedge Fund Support
Personal Claim to Fame: Raising thousands of dollars for the American Lung Association by climbing 55 flights of stairs at Penn Plaza.
Pet Peeves: Grammar misuses and poor manners.

HUMAN FISH fucked around with this message at Aug 26, 2013 around 21:30

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HUMAN FISH
Jul 6, 2003

I identify as a twinlit irl.

Newbie guide by Occupation:

SURVIVOR NEWBIES GUIDE

HELP I HAVE NEVER HEARD OF THIS 'SURVIVOR' PLEASE INFORM ME OF WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT

Welcome to the Survivor thread. Inside, we discuss the current season of Survivor; usually, bitch about how this season isn't very good; and, fondly remember, and argue about the relative quality of, previous seasons of Survivor: probably the greatest reality competition show ever except for maybe Amazing Race or Top Chef.

Survivor's premise: A group of 18 to 20 or so contestants, from all walks of life, are stuck on a (usually tropical) remote paradise and forced to live together for 39 days; gathering their own food, building their own shelter, and purifying their own water. Most of the time (but not always) they group is split into two opposing, equal teams, called tribes. (Some seasons have more than two tribes-as many as four- but no matter how many tribes there are, each tribe has the same number of contestants at the start.) The tribes must work together to form a community, in the hopes of one contestant becoming the Sole Survivor and winning one million dollars.

A typical Survivor season has three "phases", all of differing lengths.

  • Pre-merge: The first half of the season (or so). Roughly 6-9 episodes long. As of late, the merge has occurred during the seventh episode. The merge is almost always whenever 12 or 10 people remain in the game. The two(sometimes more) tribes face off twice each episode: First for reward, and second for immunity.

    • Reward challenge: The reward challenge is usually for a basic necessity that the tribes need to survive on the island. As an example, fishing gear is a common early reward, as it allows the winning tribe to be able to hunt for crucial protein. Rice is another common early reward- a simple carb is essential to, well, living. Generally early game rewards are not that crucial to win the game or gain a decisive advantage against the opposing team, with two major exceptions.

      The first reward challenge is usually for flint and steel, a necessity so the tribe can have fire for heat the ability to cook their food. More importantly, however, a fire allows the winning tribe the ability to boil water, which is necessary in the climates they are usually at to not get a disease from the presumably infected water. (Usually people don't drink any water before they can boil it, so dehydration is a major factor in tribe strength).

      Secondly, at some point, usually two or three episodes in, a reward challenge will have a tarp as the reward. This is the other major, major necessity to tribe strength; a tarp keeps the rainwater out of whatever shelter the tribe builds and keeps the tribe both relatively warm and not wet (pneumonia is always a major concern), while secondarily keeping them fit for immunity challenges.

    • Immunity challenge: If one tribe wins immunity, they are safe from elimination at the end of the episode (called "Tribal Council") and win the Immunity Idol. The team that loses must, that night, travel to the "Tribal Council Area" and vote out one of their members. Play then continues as normal.

  • Post-merge: After about 6-9 episodes, so when about half of the players of the game remain, the game features a "merge". The two tribes are no more and form one tribe, with a different color buff and name. Reward challenges now are for one person and one person only. However, they're usually allowed to pick guests to share in or go along with them- which introduces an entirely new layer of strategy to the game. Immunity challenges are now for an immunity necklace, not idol, only able to be worn by one tribe member- the winner, obviously. Whoever wears the immunity necklace at the next tribal council cannot be voted for. Immunity necklaces can be given by the winner to another player, making the gifted player immune to the vote.

  • End game: Once 5-7 players or so remain, the show reaches the End game phase. Usually the very strong core alliances are shaken up here as people try to reach the end or placate the jury.

    See, the thing that makes Survivor unique is that there's a jury. When the final three people remain, the last 9 eliminated players get called back as the Jury, wherein they're allowed to grill, yell at, quiz, comment about or whatever the hell they want to do to the final three remaining contestants. This is during the appropriately titled Final Tribal Council, (early seasons had 2 remaining contestants and 7 people on the jury) after which the jury for the player they want to win the million dollars and the title of Sole Survivor.

Man this show sounds complicated.

Nah it really isn't. It's basically Lying: The Game; the players attempt to form alliances that are strong enough so that whenever they're forced to vote someone out, their names aren't on the chopping block. Usually this is done via lying and manipulation. That's basically it. The genius of the show is the jury: the jury makes it so regardless of how well an individual player does, if they're a cutthroat, lying, evil, bastard who makes life hell for everyone else they won't win the money (cough cough Russell). Therefore, a major part of the show is being able to appease and placate people who will eventually end up eliminated, usually by the player him or herself. It creates a HUGE strategy component to the game and is why the show is so unique and awesome.

When does this show air

Usually twice a year, two seasons: Once during September (usually runs for about 15 episodes, ends around Christmas), and once during February (also runs for about 15 episodes, ending mid-May). Both seasons of Survivor that air in a television season are usually filmed-back-to-back and more recently, in the same location to save on location filming.

Oh this show sounds rad what should I watch

The "recommended" watch order of the "best" seasons of Survivor, if you have a shitload of time and want to watch the show arc and become more and more strategic over time: Borneo (season 1), Australia (season 2), Marquesas (season 4), The Amazon (season 6), Pearl Islands (season 7), All-Stars (season 8), Vanuatu (season 9), Palau (season 10), Guatemala (season 11), Panama (season 12), Cook Islands (season 13), China (season 15), Micronesia- Fans v. Favorites (season 16), Tocantins (season 18), Samoa (season 19), Heroes v. Villains (season 20), Redemption Island (season 22), Philippines (season 25).

Why:

  • Borneo- First ever season, almost like a documentary, Hatch makes up a ton of rules of the game that are still used to this day
  • Australia- First season that really resembles modern Survivor with alliances and backstabbing and strategy focus, "The Fire"
  • Marquesas- First appearance of Boston Rob (probably the most famous Survivor player ever), shows why everyone in subsequent seasons never, ever wanted to engineer a tie for any reason- this is important because a ton of subsequent seasons has people break alliances or vote against a really solid alliance they have just to avoid a tie and it seems really stupid, but Marquesas' tiebreaker challenge really indelibly left a mark on all future Survivor votes
  • The Amazon- Has one of the smartest players to ever play the game (Rob C), first ever appearance of someone giving an immunity necklace to someone else
  • Pearl Islands- Amazing cast, Johnny fuckin' Fairplay, and a bunch of really memorable scenes makes up for one of if not the shittiest twist in Survivor history.
  • All-Stars- First season with more than two tribes (had three tribes). First ever All-Star season, Boston Rob's play is absolutely brilliant (engineering a Final Tribal Council where he couldn't lose has never been done before or since), seeing all the biggest personalities back for the first time is new and exciting. The only real problem is the FTC ending up to be one of the bitterest in Survivor history. Friendships are literally destroyed over this season's final tribal.
  • Vanuatu- One of the best, most strategic underdog plays ever, with a 1 v. 6 final seven somehow ending in the 1 winning the game. Besides that, kinda mediocre overall but Chris' play is good enough to make this season great. Has the vertical maze, though, one of the most memorable immunity challenges ever.
  • Palau- The first and only time in Survivor history where a tribe doesn't end up winning a single immunity challenge. Therefore, features the worst tribe of all time. Schadenfreudian pleasure in watching the Charlie Browniest team ever get increasingly miserable. In my opinion the best, and most insane, final immunity challenge in Survivor history- goes on for twelve loving hours.
  • Guatemala- First season that has two returning players in the cast (a fixture of later seasons). First appearance of the incredibly weak and useless hidden immunity idol.
  • Panama- First season with four tribes. Features Cirie, one of the most strategic players ever. First appearance of Exile Island, wherein the tribe that wins the immunity challenge sends a member of another tribe to a remote location to fend for themselves with minimal supplies. After that...eh.
  • Cook Islands- All four tribes are divided by race. Features the first and only appearance of the revamped, completely overpowered hidden immunity idol, which results in the best immunity idol play ever. Features Yul, Penner (two of the most strategic players ever) Ozzy, (one of the all-around strongest competitors in Survivor history) who turns out to be a fixture of later seasons (and an annoying loving twat, but whatever). Also features Parvati, who sucks this season but would later turn out to be a manipulative genius in later seasons. Also features the first usage of a final three tribal council over a final two, and a nine-person jury over a seven-person jury.
  • China- Unique location, great challenges, totally different tone to the season- and first appearance of Amanda, an amazingly strong all-around player who would become a fixture of later seasons (and turn in some of the worst final tribal council performances ever). Has Courtney, the -est player ever. Great season.
  • Micronesia- A pseudo- All-Stars season, great cast, hilarious pre-merge play, amazing post-merge play (including the manipulation of someone to make one of the stupidest plays in Survivor history) makes this season one of the best ever.
  • Tocantins- The first usage of Exile Island strategically. Features the man, the myth, the legend of Coach, the most utterly ridiculous Survivor player ever. First ever time a Survivor season could be argued to be co-won, since Stephen and JT basically cover each others' weaknesses perfectly. Wonderful season.
  • Samoa- First appearance of the divisive Russell Hantz. Probably the best underdog play in Survivor history, with the 4 Foa Foa members entering the merge against 8 Galu members and ending up part of the final five. Great blindsides and strategic play. Great, great season of Survivor.
  • Heroes v. Villains- Second "true" All-Stars season, and the personalities are much more vibrant and interesting this time around. If you've seen the previous seasons wherein the people competing are from it's absolutely great. Also has Russell Hantzing it up like a madman. Also has the imo stupidest Survivor play of all time.
  • Redemption Island- Fourth (fourth!) Boston Rob appearance ends with him utterly dominating the game like it's never been dominated before. The Redemption Island twist ends up sucking but in my opinion it so perfectly ends the character arc of Boston Rob from his start as the cocky idiot in Marquesas, to the mastermind with bad jury management in All-Stars, to the completely getting hosed over due to bad luck in HvV, to his final incarnation as an brilliant, strong, and ruthless champion in RI.
  • Philippines- A brilliant season from start to finish, never letting up- includes the single worst tribe ever in Survivor history (so long, Ulong), some genuinely amazing stunt casting that actually adds to the enjoyment, and at least seven or eight people who deserved to win for one reason or another. After three seasons of pure bullshit, this season was just fantastic on literally every level. Denise's story is amazing- you can't write TV that good.

Wow that's a lot of show to watch. Abridge it?

Yeah sure. Watch China, Tocantins, Samoa, or Cook Islands, they're what the Survivor thread considers the best seasons with no returning players. Fans v. Favorites and Heroes v. Villains are the best seasons of Survivor overall; however, a lot of their appeal is in knowing the characters who are participating from their seasons. In other words, you'll have to watch everything I listed to get the full effect of the greatness of Micronesia/ HvV.

Also, if you're at all interested in what non-goons have to say Dalton Ross and Jeff Probst rank the Survivor seasons for you. But why would you do that? Survivor goons know best

Glossary of Terms

The Survivor thread can get really, really jargony from time to time because we're all a bunch of Survivor spergs who just use a ton of shorthand. Here's what they mean:

Pagonged: In the first-ever season of Survivor, the Tagi tribe ended up with more players than the Pagong tribe going into the merge and ended up voting tribal lines, eliminating all members of the Pagong tribe from the game before voting themselves out. This revolutionary strategy has been copied in pretty much every Survivor since, and when it's successful it's called a "Pagonging", in honor of the eliminated tribe. It's the reason that it's so important to win immunity challenges pre-merge- usually both tribes enter the merge and vote tribal lines, so whichever team enters the merge with more players usually ends up the one which "wins".

Ulonged: In Palau, the Ulong tribe didn't win a single immunity challenge and kept on voting out the wrong players (usually their strongest or smartest), so it all snowballed into them losing every single immunity challenge pre-merge. Only Stephanie survived from the Ulong tribe to get "conquered" by the opposing tribe and eventually voted out. We now speculate as to whether or not a tribe that does miserably in the early going and racks up a bunch of early game losses will be "Ulonged"- will lose every single immunity challenge.

HII (Hidden Immunity Idol): Introduced in Guatemala, the HII was an object hidden at camp or Exile Island, that when found and played (usually after a series of clues leading to the HII's location were given) could prevent a player from going home that night. It could only be used once. Supposed to delay or gently caress up Pagongings, initially, it was really weak- it had to be played before the votes were cast, so what ended up happening was everyone switched their votes to someone else in the alliance they were targeting and the play continued as normal. Then, in Cook Islands the HII was revamped to be obscenely strong- it had to be played after the votes were read (the player with the next-most votes would go home if the player with the most votes played the HII), which meant Yul just told everyone that he had the idol and would play it for his alliance members, making his core alliance untouchable as everyone else ended up being voted out, afraid of being targeted by his alliance.

After Cook Islands the HII's rules were again revamped to what they are now, that it has to be played after the votes are cast but before they are read- basically, if it's played right can really change the game but it's not overpowerful nonsense like it was in CI.

Used to be only one HII in the game, usually at Exile Island, now there is one HII for each tribe, usually located at their camp.

Double boot: Usually early on into a Survivor season, there will be an episode where both tribes have to eliminate a tribe member (both go to tribal council), and the only challenge of the episode is either for individual immunity or for reward. Called a double boot episode when it happens.

Double elimination: A twist featured at the end of an episode of Survivor is that the tribe that lost the immunity challenge, unbeknownst to them, has to eliminate not one but two members. Usually revealed after the tribe has finished voting out a tribemate, they are usually given no time to deliberate and must vote again immediately.

Purple rocks: In the event of a tie at Tribal Council, there is a revote, with only the people receiving the most votes being eligible to receive votes during that revote. If the revote also ends in a tie, Survivors draw rocks, with the exception of the players receiving votes and any players with immunity. Whichever player draws the differently coloured rock is eliminated from the game. It's happened once before, and the differently coloured rock was purple.

This is a powerful incentive for players to avoid ties, as it takes players' fates out of their hands and puts it in the hands of chance, while ensuring that three of the most powerful players in the game remain in it. It means that each individual player sees a strong reason to flip from his or her alliance, and it's worked. Ties have largely been avoided for the past 22 seasons or so.

This is true at every tribal council but the Final Four. The math for the purple rocks doesn't work where there are only 4 players left - take away the immune player and the players receiving votes, and there is only one player left to draw rocks. Unfortunately, production only realized this didn't work after going through with it once, in Survivor Marquesas. Now, ties at Final Four are resolved with a challenge between the tied players, usually a fire-making challenge. (All credit goes to Pinterest Mom for this entry)

Blindside: When a tribal council seems to be set up so one or one of two possible players are getting eliminated, but somehow either a secret coalition or a surprising idol play makes it so someone else who nobody in the tribe suspected of being eliminated gets eliminated, it's called a "blindside". Usually sets up hilarious reaction gifs that the thread reposts infinitely.

Eel/Shambo.gif: Totally awesome! Make sure to ask the thread if you're new all about it. The results will totally surprise you!

Hantzed: Named after Russell Hantz from Samoa's proclivities to find idols without clues, it's now used as a term to describe a player who looks for HIIs without a clue, or a player who accomplishes said feat.

Splitting votes/Voodoo strategy: Originating in Cook Islands by noted crazy person and proto-Coach Cao Boi, the idea of an alliance that splits its votes between two members to "out" the idol. For instance, if an alliance has 6 members to an opposing alliance's 3, but one person in the 3 has an HII, the alliance would voted 3 for one member in the alliance and 3 for another, so even if the idol is played one of the members of the alliance is voted out (since it'd be a 3/3/3 tie, the idol would eliminate 3 votes for one member which would result in a 3/3 tie and a revote). It's extremely risky, and we went through a long eight-season stretch of it backfiring on the majority alliance every single time it was used. In the last five seasons, though, it's been used very frequently, up to three times a season, and has worked almost every single time. It's an example of the Survivor metagame evolving and players wisening up to new tactics. (All credit goes to Pinterest Mom for this entry)

Who the gently caress is Kelly: Usually anybody named Kelly in any season of Survivor will be a totally generic, personality-less automaton, usually the boring cheerleader type. Someone will post "Who the gently caress is Kelly" after cast announcements if the name Kelly is included because it's like so funny or something. You know how goons are.

Pony/Poison: Usually after cast announcements, but before the season airs, thread members will pick a "Pony" (someone who they think will be awesome and totally win) and a "Poison" (someone who they think will suck and be an annoying rear end in a top hat and will root to lose). Thread ponies are usually anybody who's intelligent or seems to be a hardcore Survivor fan, and thread poisons are people who look or sound stupid, racists, morons, and type-A brodudes (because we're all fat, ugly goons).

Challenge beast/challenge monster: A person who's really physically adept and capable, who wins challenges for their team almost single-handedly. Usually kept around until right before or right after the merge so they don't go one a "challenge run" and make the final two/three and win based on sheer physical strength. Noted challenge beasts include Ozzy and JT.

Provider: Usually an older dude who's really good at hunting and working who thinks, foolishly, that their "tribe value" will somehow save him from elimination- because then who will get the tribe food/firewood then, huh?! Usually really stupid and naive. Rupert is the king of this type of player.

Mastermind/puppetmaster: The strategic guy in the tribe. Usually the one who facilitates blindsides and backstabbings. If they make it to the FTC they're always in danger of being bitter juried out of a win. Russell is the premier mastermind player, but Yul and Chris are also notable.

Under the radar: The most common strategy of the game currently, reliant on letting the mastermind or challenge beast draw all the heat, never pissing anyone off, and getting into the FTC and winning it all based on not having done anything wrong to anyone ever. Notable UTR players: Sophie, Natalie

Social gamer: A player who forms strong alliances with everyone on the eventual jury and isn't physically strong or the mastermind, but is able to sway people the way they want votes to land. Social game players: Sandra, Parvati, Amber

Bitter jury: Because the game is reliant on a jury to vote on the winner there is a perception that sometimes the player who "deserves" to win gets "cheated" out of a win because they were such a rude, arrogant backstabbing rear end in a top hat to the people they betrayed that the jury doesn't vote for anyone so much as against a player. Also leads to really awkward, awful FTCs where a bunch of lying douchebags rail against other lying douchebags for being lying douchebags on a game show, as opposed to any sort of strategy discussion. If you're watching an FTC and you see someone bring up the word "integrity", congrats, you've found a bitter jury member!

Although jury management is an extremely important part of the game juries have generally gotten more bitter and more angry over time, which has led to generally worse FTCs and finales.

Goat: Someone useless, awful, or crazy that the mastermind player lugs with him or her to the final two/three ("riding the goat"). The jury is then forced to vote between someone they hate with a passion or the mastermind that orchestrated their removal. Really common in the old seasons of Survivor, before the implementation of the final three in Cook Islands- indeed, part of the reason for the final three change was so that "bringing a goat" wasn't as viable a strategy any more - it still was used as recently as Redemption Island with Boston Rob lugging Phillip all the way to FTC. Goats have the side benefit of attracting all the heat vote-wise until the final two/three. Notable goats: Phillip, Twila

Coattail rider: What certain UTR players get accused of being- instead of being subtle and quiet, they're accused of being boring and unimaginative, relying on the mastermind/challenge beast to do all the heavy lifting. Notable "coattail riders": Natalie, Sophie.

Throwing an immunity challenge: The concept of intentionally losing an immunity challenge because there's a member of the tribe which is somehow cancerous to the tribe or is otherwise undesirable. Always, always a terrible loving idea and it never, ever works out well for the tribe in question. Seriously if someone urges to throw an immunity challenge they're guaranteed to be an idiot with no sense of strategy.


Mactor: Portmanteau of "Model/Actor", if you see any contestant with either of those two as their "profession", especially if it's literally both, they're probably this. Mactors get a lot of heat from diehard Survivor fans and this thread because they're usually not Survivor "fans", and indeed didn't even apply for the season- most are actively recruited by Survivor's casting director (Lynne Spillman). The prevailing theory is that she actively recruits any friends of her best friends- who are former Survivor contestants like Parvati Shallow, Amanda Kimmel, etc. She also primarily recruits from the gym she goes to in the LA area and basically hot people she meets within the city.

Mactors are hated for a variety of reasons: 1) Usually, they have no strategic sense of the way the game is played- so they go on and on about "honor" and "integrity" and think they're the smartest fuckers ever to exist for coming up with, say, the idea of the blindside or some really basic strategic idea. 2) Usually, they're lazy whiny fuckers who don't do anything around camp and constantly complain about how hungry they are and just throw massive pity parties for themselves. 3) Mactors are usually the ones who quit- quitters MASSIVELY gently caress up the game and game flow in a variety of different ways, and quitters and quit threatens have lead to the prevailing trend of current Survivor seasons to have overstuffed and overcast tribes with a bunch of extra people because they "figure in" that people are going to quit. It also leads to situations like Nicaragua where two people quit in the same night and ended up on the jury, which was just loving reprehensible.

4) Most commonly and annoyingly, they've never seen a season of Survivor beyond the ones that CBS sends to all its contestants once they're cast (which is always the last 2-3 seasons), so it leads to really loving annoying poo poo like Nicaragua. Nicaragua was the season immediately after Samoa and Heroes v Villains, which were dominated in their screentime by Russell, so Nicaragua had about 6 people in their pre-interviews say they were the next Russell Hantz. The gameplay also suffered as about half of the contestants tried to play the exact same Russell game, with horrid results. It ended up making the season really, really boring to watch as everyone tried to backstab each other and be the biggest dick for no strategic reason other than "the only Survivor we watched Russell did it and got a lot of screentime, and we want screentime to launch modelling/acting careers". (This also happened to a much less significant extent during South Pacific/One World as a bunch of mactors tried to emulate Boston Rob's cult-like play during Redemption Island).

Film cycles: Every odd-numbered season of Survivor is usually filmed during mid-to-late summer. The show then takes a two-week break as they send home the previous season's contestants, set up the new tribe locations, send the last bit of film, fly in the new challenges, and set up the new film locations as they fly in the next season's contestants. The next season's -the even-numbered season's- contestants usually compete from early September to early October, so right before winter really kicks into high gear. (Early September to early October is also when the odd-numbered season that was just finished starts airing). What does this mean? Well, in some film cycles (notably seasons 11-12-Palau-Guatemala, seasons 15-16-China-Micronesia, and seasons 19-20 Samoa-Heroes v. Villains) they bring back a returning contestant (or two) from the previous, odd-numbered season to compete in the next, even-numbered season. (This has happened most famously with Amanda Kimmel from China and Russell Hantz from Samoa).

Doing back-to-back Survivor runs with only a two-week break in the middle is an insane test of endurance. The contestants that do so usually get dangerously thin, and if they make it to the finale in back-to-back seasons (like with Amanda and Russell), have been playing Survivor for so long without a real break that they start to lose it. This is most famously seen with Russell's HvV play, wherein near the end he completely loving loses his grip on sanity and becomes a paranoid mess, which directly leads to his loss during the finale.

He starts plotting a bunch of un-Hantz-like "stabbing his closest companions in the back" moves that are totally not in keeping with how he normally plays the game and only make the jury pissed off at him more than they already are. The only feasible explanation- since Russell is usually a pragmatic and calculated player- is that he spends so much time playing Survivor that he sees everyone as his enemy and basically develops low-grade cabin fever. Likewise, Amanda Kimmel during the finale of Micronesia (the season she back-to-backed in) has spent so much time plotting to stab people in the back and betray their trust that she devolves into a weepy mess during her FTC performance. Which, again, probably had something to do with spending so much time playing Survivor and not spending time in normal interactions with other human beings.

That being said, doing back-to-back Survivor runs with no breaks is also a huge benefit; if appearing in both season in a film cycle, a returning player (who is usually really, really good) has both the experience of having just finished playing a game of Survivor (so they're in the right mental "mood" to play) while also playing against people who have no idea who they are, their personalities, or how they play (the short delay between seasons means the even-numbered season contestants don't get dvds of the season which just finished filming). This, for instance, hugely benefitted Russell on HvV because Boston Rob completely and utterly discounted him as a viable threat until it was almost too late, and the fact that nobody knew who he was or how he played literally meant he got an idol for free out of it.

You'll see Survivor thread alums debate and argue whenever the interminably awful "Russell- greatest player ever?" arguements start up, and whenever they talk about "film cycles" or Russell's various HvV advantages (and disadvantages) this is what they mean.

Edits: Survivor is, above all else, a tv show. Indeed, it's a tv show that beyond its gameplay attempts to tell a narrative arc for its cast, so sometimes the concept of "edits" and a person getting an "edit" will be bandied around in the Survivor thread.

Since, obviously, the editors for each season of Survivor know who win (or at least, who makes the final 2/3 and, more abstractly, the jury), they know that the viewers want to know the eventual winner as well as possible. So, usually, the final 2 to 3 receive a majority of the screentime of the season, especially if the final 2/3 all are part of the same alliance.

The viewing audience also wants to know the jury at least fairly well so they usually (with about one to two exceptions) get the rest of the screentime during the season.

Beyond that, there's the concept of "character edits".
  • Hero Edit: The winner of the season is edited to be as honorable, noble, or admirable as possible. Usually scenes of them being lovely aren't included. Any scenes of them in conflict with another tribemate are usually presented as the hero "in the right", and any sneaky or underhanded play is presented as brilliant/necessary for survival. The winner of the season and any cast member which the show is interested in bringing back in subsequent seasons are edited this way. Usually, the challenge beast is edited to be a hero.
  • Villain Edit: The antagonist of the winner is usually edited to be the "villan". Any scenes of them being lazy, evil, stupid, or an rear end in a top hat are usually edited to be incredibly damning. Any scenes of "strategy playing"- blindsides etc- are usually presented as the villain being a backstabbing douche. Villains usually advance far but don't win- many make the FTC and lose, much of the time due to a bitter jury. "Villains" usually get brought back into a subsequent season, usually under the redemption edit.
  • Buffoon/Crazy Person Edit: Any goats or entertainingly bad players usually get edited like this. Usually used as evidence for why the mastermind player would lug them to the FTC. Their ineptitude/craziness is overstated and this is usually where the editors have the most fun with digs on them (for instance, whenever Coach talked on Toncantins the editor would edit in an eagle cry to make him even more ridiculous).
  • Punching Bag Player Edit: These players are usually edited to be constantly picked upon, bullied, or otherwise mistreated. Usually presented as through no fault of their own- the tribe just, suddenly, for no reason, decided to pick on the player, either because they look weird, are physically weak, or are otherwise bizarre (usually the buffoon and crazy person is also the punching bag). Punching Bags usually flip going into the merge- so the narrative tries to present their flip as justified or otherwise understandable. Usually where most of the complaints of "disingenuous editing" come from when contestants complain about editing- Sugar from Gabon and Sierra from Toncantins were both constantly poo poo on in their respective seasons and were edited as the punching bags just trying to survive the horrible assholes on their tribe. According to the contestants who played with them, however, they were actually horribly annoying, whiny douches. The claim that Sugar was actually a gigantic whiny annoying baby seems to have at least some merit, since her edit in HvV presented her as such.

The Survivor thread usually argues that "X person is getting Y edit, so can/can't win, is gonna make the merge/be eliminated before the merge, etc". However, it all kind of boils down to informed guessing, since there are so many exceptions to the "guidelines" of how a person who reaches X position is edited the only real hard-and-fast rule that you can hold to is that if someone who up until that episode had no confessional/screen time whatsoever suddenly gets a ton, and they don't do ANYTHING to warrant it like have a legendary freakout, they're being eliminated that episode. Survivor seems to favor presenting an about-to-be-eliminated player in the fullest light possible before they're voted off, but that's pretty much the only really reliable rule to hold to.

HUMAN FISH fucked around with this message at Aug 27, 2013 around 18:46

Poque
Sep 11, 2003



I hope Colton literally dies.

GuavaMoment
Aug 13, 2006

YouTube dude


HUMAN FISH posted:

Katie Collins (25)
Personal Claim to Fame: Raising thousands of dollars for the American Lung Association by climbing 55 flights of stairs at Penn Plaza.

Ha ha ha are you kidding me?! You're claim to fame is for climbing fifty-five flights of stairs? Wow, what a feat! I think I've immediately found my non-Colton poison.

HUMAN FISH
Jul 6, 2003

I identify as a twinlit irl.

Sorry guys, I'm new at this OP poo poo so I forgot these






edit: Also your non-Colton poison should be Rupert.

TheChad
Oct 9, 2007

[let's] fuck that crazy-ass robot

Poque posted:

I hope Colton literally dies.

Me too.

TMMadman
Sep 9, 2003

Every thousand generations, a perfect child is born, a Goulden Child. He has come to rescue us.

HUMAN FISH posted:

Colton's housekeeper Caleb Bankston (26)
Relationship to Significant Castaway: Colton’s Fiancé


I am very good at working with my hands....

I can't be the only one to be a little child and tee-hee at this out of context.

Aerox
Jan 8, 2012



Pony: Tina. One of my favorite winners ever.
Non-Colton/Related to Colton Poison: Rupert. Get off my television forever, please.

King Burgundy
Sep 17, 2003

"You can fight!"
"Thank you!"

It feels like it would be easier to list people who aren't my poisons.

gently caress this season.

TheChad
Oct 9, 2007

[let's] fuck that crazy-ass robot

So, if Colton Candice and Rupert get booted first this season will be salvageable.

Guys it could totally happen.

HUMAN FISH
Jul 6, 2003

I identify as a twinlit irl.

Personally I think this is Aras' game to lose. He's like the only one in the cast with a strategic bone in his body.

Poison? DIE RUPERT DIE

Bjay9
May 3, 2011

Kid, touch is for video games and gynecologists

Wanna see Tyson and Aras team up and bully Rupert. Would be the best thing.

Lone Goat
Apr 16, 2003

When life gives you lemons, suplex those lemons.

Saw Kat's picture, had to make sure that it wasn't her brother.

HUMAN FISH posted:

John Cody (30)
Pet Peeves: Slow thinkers, talkers, and movers, people who eat paper, illogical, irrational and inflexible people, excuses, mouth breathers.

Oh yeah, you'll get along just fine on this show.

SymfonyMan
Jul 13, 2001

Back in action!


So two things I hate about Survivor are returning? Great. I'm really not looking forward to this season for the first time in Survivor's history. Just think about it, with Redemption Island back in play that means when Colton's voted out he won't be going away.

Jeff is a loving moron.

HyperPuma
Jun 24, 2007

Put your Hitlers away Missy, they've been up all night!


Why is candice on AGAIN this season?
Why is colton allowed to play this game again?
Why did they bring back RI, a twist that was so badly received jeff had to try and defend it in his blogs?
Why is this season?

HUMAN FISH
Jul 6, 2003

I identify as a twinlit irl.

A+++ topic change, thank you whoever you are.

JesusSinfulHands
Oct 24, 2007
Sartre and Russell are my heroes

Apparently the only reason Candice is on this season is because RC's dad has high blood pressure so they got axed and Candice and her hubby were the alternates, so they got on. Horray?

Poque
Sep 11, 2003



JesusSinfulHands posted:

Apparently the only reason Candice is on this season is because RC's dad has high blood pressure so they got axed and Candice and her hubby were the alternates, so they got on. Horray?

RC ruins EVERYTHING

paperchaseguy
Feb 21, 2002

THEY'RE GONNA SAY NO

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Plv2bH76PyY

DurosKlav
Jun 13, 2003

Deutsche Panzer im Sonnenbrand, Stehen zur Kampf gegen England

Not sure if this is kosher or not but if anyones seen the bootlist can you pm me at what point colton gets eliminated? This will pretty much determine if I watch this season or not. Dont want the full list just when he is eliminated for good.

cletus42o
Apr 11, 2003

Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light.

poo poo, am I the only one looking forward to Colton?

Factor Mystic
Mar 19, 2006

Baby's First Post-Apocalyptic Fiction

HyperPuma posted:

Why is candice on AGAIN this season?
Why is colton allowed to play this game again?
Why did they bring back RI, a twist that was so badly received jeff had to try and defend it in his blogs?
Why is this season?
Would emptyquote if I could, this is going to be a terrible season.



I'm going to watch anyway

E: I hate everyone except for Aras and Tyson's ok too I guess but everyone else I hate. Especially Candice? WHY??? AND COLTON NOOO

E2: Tina is also allowed to not-die-in-a-fire

Factor Mystic fucked around with this message at Aug 26, 2013 around 23:26

DurosKlav
Jun 13, 2003

Deutsche Panzer im Sonnenbrand, Stehen zur Kampf gegen England

I'd only look forward to him playing again is if it meant he got completely poo poo on every single day and he ended up walking off into the jungle never to be heard from again.

Asiina
Apr 26, 2011

BOOTS!

DurosKlav posted:

Not sure if this is kosher or not but if anyones seen the bootlist can you pm me at what point colton gets eliminated? This will pretty much determine if I watch this season or not. Dont want the full list just when he is eliminated for good.

I'm basically in this boat as well. Once the boot list is inevitably leaked I may ask a non-fan friend to check when Colton leaves, because I simply refuse to watch him again.

Pinterest Mom
Jun 9, 2009



DurosKlav posted:

Not sure if this is kosher or not but if anyones seen the bootlist can you pm me at what point colton gets eliminated? This will pretty much determine if I watch this season or not. Dont want the full list just when he is eliminated for good.

As of right now, the only things that are known are pre-jury boots, jury members, and final two/three.

Robnoxious
Feb 17, 2004



KKKolton and Rupert?

I may drop this season before it even starts.

SLICK GOKU BABY
Jun 12, 2001


I think we should give this season a chance, the game is going to be completely different this time around.

RI this time isn't going to be the same as before, as players on redemption island can trade spots with their loved ones (who are still in the game) and continue playing on the other tribe. Going to be some interesting dynamics this season, even if they brought shitheads to play it.

TheChad
Oct 9, 2007

[let's] fuck that crazy-ass robot

SLICK GOKU BABY posted:

even if they brought shitheads to play it.

It was mostly this part that turns me off, not the RI poo poo.

jivjov
Sep 13, 2007

But how does it taste?
YUMMY!


DurosKlav posted:

Not sure if this is kosher or not but if anyones seen the bootlist can you pm me at what point colton gets eliminated? This will pretty much determine if I watch this season or not. Dont want the full list just when he is eliminated for good.

I also would like to be privy to this information.

NO LISTEN TO ME
Jan 2, 2009

groove


So a friend of mine has Time Warner and apparently they're being a pain in the rear end right now and not carrying CBS or something? If it doesn't clear up by the time Survivor's on, any way for him to watch it?

jivjov
Sep 13, 2007

But how does it taste?
YUMMY!


NO LISTEN TO ME posted:

So a friend of mine has Time Warner and apparently they're being a pain in the rear end right now and not carrying CBS or something? If it doesn't clear up by the time Survivor's on, any way for him to watch it?

Well, hopefully CBS will pull their heads out of their asses and at least allow their shows to be watched on CBS.com. There's literally no reason the broadcast TV dispute should affect their website.

That said, since they do freely put every episode on their website, so that may make a case for being permissible.

Green Vulture
Jun 9, 2007
Just a neighborly reminder that you're a goddamned retard.

Two things regarding Colton's return: I think enough time has passed between One World and now that most players realize he is a vile, racist piece of poo poo crybaby, and if he wants to stand a chance in this game, he better switch up his strategy.

But more importantly, you have to remember that Colton's original tribe was comprised of complete loving morons who were easily swayed by his whims and tantrums (and even after he left, they remained incredibly stupid); just based on some of the returning players, I doubt he'll get away with that this time.

EDIT: But yeah, him and Rupert together on the same screen...this is gonna be some tough-going TV to watch.

SLICK GOKU BABY
Jun 12, 2001


jivjov posted:

Well, hopefully CBS will pull their heads out of their asses and at least allow their shows to be watched on CBS.com. There's literally no reason the broadcast TV dispute should affect their website.

That said, since they do freely put every episode on their website, so that may make a case for being permissible.

:files: is still not okay. The reason why they put the episodes up on their websites is so they can still make money off people watching it. If you don't have adblock running, you will still get to watch commercials during the episodes.

But yea, to the guy asking about it, CBS usually puts episodes of Survivor up the next day so you can still watch it legally for free. Or you can hook your TV up to an antenna to watch Survivor, it's still free over the airwaves.

Also, I hope you guys are ready for the Colton redemption story line that is going to come this season...

Robnoxious
Feb 17, 2004



NO LISTEN TO ME posted:

So a friend of mine has Time Warner and apparently they're being a pain in the rear end right now and not carrying CBS or something? If it doesn't clear up by the time Survivor's on, any way for him to watch it?
Live streaming sites are a ?safe? area as far as the SA rules go. I'll err to the side of caution if I am wrong on that and not post them publicly. I'll have many avenues when the season kicks off, just PM me if you need links. I tend to watch Survivor and BB on East Coast time just so I can engage in the live threads even though I'm in Cali.

Lone Goat
Apr 16, 2003

When life gives you lemons, suplex those lemons.

Green Vulture posted:

Two things regarding Colton's return: I think enough time has passed between One World and now that most players realize he is a vile, racist piece of poo poo crybaby, and if he wants to stand a chance in this game, he better switch up his strategy.

Nah he'll get taken to the end as a goat. ALL COLTON ALL THE TIME

Super Aggro Crag
Apr 23, 2008

In nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti, etc etc...


I hope KKKolton falls into the fire. What a piece of poo poo.

DurosKlav
Jun 13, 2003

Deutsche Panzer im Sonnenbrand, Stehen zur Kampf gegen England

Lone Goat posted:

Nah he'll get taken to the end as a goat. ALL COLTON ALL THE TIME

Thats my major fear. I really hate the goat strategy no matter how good it is. Just means these terrible people are being rewarded for being horrible people instead of being told to gently caress off.

heybrother
Jan 4, 2013


Yeah, and a lot of the fun for me with Survivor is comparing winners and seasons which is pretty much all thrown out the window this season with the twists. The big family twist would still be salvageable and intriguing if it weren't for the awful casting and added on top of that the terrible returnees essentially ruin the possibility of a whole other cast member being enjoyable because I really can't imagine Rupert's wife or Candace's husband inspiring a ton of entertainment into my television screen. I love Probst for his passion as a host but beyond that I wish he would stick to fondling Boston Rob's balls and leave the behind the scenes decisions to someone else.

Green Vulture
Jun 9, 2007
Just a neighborly reminder that you're a goddamned retard.

Lone Goat posted:

Nah he'll get taken to the end as a goat. ALL COLTON ALL THE TIME
I still think Colton will do a complete 180 from how he was last time, or at least make a valiant effort--this "Meet the Castaways" interview with him and his fiance seems to hint at that.

And then gets his rear end voted off early anyways--he did nothing around camp during One World and it's not like he was a challenge beast, either.

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STAC Goat
Mar 12, 2008





I never finished my Survivor marathon so I have no idea who Colton, Laura, Kat, and Monica are but it doesn't sound like their seasons are especially worth seeking out as prerequisite viewing. Am I right?

I do know who Hayden and Brad Culpepper are so that seems to balance things out a bit.

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