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OMG JC a Bomb!
Jul 13, 2004

We are the Invisible Spatula. We are the Grilluminati. We eat before and after dinner. We eat forever. And eventually... eventually we will lead them into the dining room.
Jesus loving Christ.

The FBI does not do security.

Edit:Ahaha are you loving kidding?

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Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


The FBI lady really isn't a good actress. Surely they could have cast a different attractive woman.

Baronash
Feb 29, 2012

So what do you want to be called?
This show just does not set up the stakes even remotely well.

Gyges
Aug 4, 2004

NOW NO ONE
RECOGNIZE HULK
Of course she doesn't call for back up or anything for this chemical/biological bomb in the zoo.

Edit: Are we supposed to like anyone in this, or is it just about how smug Spader can be?

Gyges fucked around with this message at 03:46 on Sep 24, 2013

OMG JC a Bomb!
Jul 13, 2004

We are the Invisible Spatula. We are the Grilluminati. We eat before and after dinner. We eat forever. And eventually... eventually we will lead them into the dining room.
A digital clock that beeps. Clearly a mastermind at work.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


JohnSherman posted:

This show just does not set up the stakes even remotely well.
This episode would be more appropriate as a movie. You really can't do this kind of plot in only 42 minutes.

JD Bucks 7
Jul 18, 2013
Follows tracking chip to shoot a guy who isn't him. Only when he sees the tracking chip in his hand "he pulled the tracking chip!" Are you serious?

Gyges
Aug 4, 2004

NOW NO ONE
RECOGNIZE HULK

JD Bucks 7 posted:

Follows tracking chip to shoot a guy who isn't him. Only when he sees the tracking chip in his hand "he pulled the tracking chip!" Are you serious?

Clearly the FBI is completely incompetent in this show. I don't think they've done anything right the entire episode.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


At least the FBI agent called in for backup.

OMG JC a Bomb!
Jul 13, 2004

We are the Invisible Spatula. We are the Grilluminati. We eat before and after dinner. We eat forever. And eventually... eventually we will lead them into the dining room.
All the Emmy awards for Happy Slavic Bomb Man.

Gyges
Aug 4, 2004

NOW NO ONE
RECOGNIZE HULK
Are you making GBS threads me?

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


The bigger question is, do you guys think Hostages had a better premiere?

Zero One
Dec 30, 2004

HAIL TO THE VICTORS!
Her husband works with Treadstone.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Wow, worst rendition of 99 Problems ever.

404GoonNotFound
Aug 6, 2006

The McRib is back!?!?
Well... that was underwhelming.

OMG JC a Bomb!
Jul 13, 2004

We are the Invisible Spatula. We are the Grilluminati. We eat before and after dinner. We eat forever. And eventually... eventually we will lead them into the dining room.

Josh Lyman posted:

Wow, worst rendition of 99 Problems ever.

Just came out of nowhere. Comedy of the year, right here.

Kammat
Feb 9, 2008
Odd Person
Gonna give this another ep or two just for Spader, but that wasn't completely selling me on the show.

Gyges
Aug 4, 2004

NOW NO ONE
RECOGNIZE HULK
No, really what was even the point of her being married?

Mental Hospitality
Jan 5, 2011

Damnit NBC. Why can't you make good shows anymore?

404GoonNotFound
Aug 6, 2006

The McRib is back!?!?

SouthLAnd posted:

Damnit NBC. Why can't you make good shows anymore?

There's still Parks & Rec, dammit.

Mental Hospitality
Jan 5, 2011

404GoonNotFound posted:

There's still Parks & Rec, dammit.

I guess I should have specified hour long dramas.

Whip Slagcheek
Sep 21, 2008

Finally
The Gasoline And Dynamite
Will Light The Sky
For The Night


Jesus this was... not good. The FBI was cringeworthy and the female lead is not good at all. It was mentioned earlier, but this show doesn't lend itself to being a hour long drama. It probably needs to be a movie or a miniseries.

Alris
Apr 20, 2007

Welcome to the Fantasy Zone!

Get ready!

SouthLAnd posted:

I guess I should have specified hour long dramas.

There's always Hannibal :gibs:

Haven't had a chance to see it yet, but it sounds like there's not much to be excited about. If so that's a real shame, I'll stick with it for a few episodes either way.

Whip Slagcheek
Sep 21, 2008

Finally
The Gasoline And Dynamite
Will Light The Sky
For The Night


I could not have given less of a poo poo about the little girl or her husband and never felt like there was any drama to what was happening. That the Ukrainian dude just ran off the bomb and she's just :shrug: blew my mind.

I'll give it a couple of episodes to get its feet because the premise is interesting though. They just need to tighten up the writing. If it's going to be a flavor of the week format it won't last.

Regy Rusty
Apr 26, 2010

Wow the FBI on this show is about as competent as Dexter's Miami Metro.

I liked the two leads a lot though and the premise is interesting, so I think it deserves a few weeks.

Tide
Mar 27, 2010

by FactsAreUseless
The lovechild of The Rock and Silence of the Lambs.

Plot twist that none sees coming: she is the Spaders daughter

CaptainCaveman
Apr 16, 2005

Always searching for North.
That show was kind of interesting, if just for how the scenes with Spader were really good, and everything else was amazingly bad. If I don't have anything better to do Monday nights I may end up watching it just to see if it gets any better, but I don't really see it being something I'll go out of my way to watch.

Was the shape on the box that was under the floor at all similar to the shape of the scar on her palm? I wasn't really paying a whole lot of attention by that point but I thought it looked like the camera made a point of lingering on the shape on the box lid.

precision
May 7, 2006

by VideoGames
I thought it was OK. It had a good tone with the comical bits.

The first episode of Person of Interest was not very good either.

I Am Fowl
Mar 8, 2008

nononononono
That was just so...okay.

The worst part was the zoo.

Spader: There's no time to call in the bomb squad.

And you know why there's no time? Because she was too stupid to tell the rest of the FBI that the bomb was at the zoo.

Tide
Mar 27, 2010

by FactsAreUseless
Okay, just finished it. It's not too bad, but it seems like it can't quite figure out if it is suppose to be serious or funny, which is probably not a good thing. I will give it a few weeks or so.

Stabbey_the_Clown
Sep 21, 2002
Probation
Can't post for 3 hours!
Taco Defender

Mr. Fowl posted:

And you know why there's no time? Because she was too stupid to tell the rest of the FBI that the bomb was at the zoo.

She might have done that off-screen, they did show up without anyone being seen to call them.

I thought it was generally okay, although the obvious trap on the bridge was really stupidly obvious. It also didn't make a lot of sense because later on the head bad guy seemed really surprised that the girl he wanted to kidnap was under FBI protection. Until that point, I had thought that he had known about the FBI's involvement and Spader telling the FBI about the kidnap attempt was part of the plan to kidnap her.

Since the bad guy was surprised, that means he thought he needed his 12 guy ambush set up to what, intercept a minivan driven by a soccer mom?

I don't think the husband is dead just yet, because otherwise it would be pointless.

I did like the lead woman character and am sufficiently intrigued by the mystery of her past, her husband, and why Spader chose her. I especially liked the part where to show Spader that she was not going to be a pushover, she stabbed him in the neck with a pen.

This was still better than Zero Hour and The Following.

Teek
Aug 7, 2006

I can't wait to entertain you.
It seems fairly obvious that Spader would be her father, even if he's not, you would think SOMEONE would have at least mentioned them possibly being related within the pilot. The fact no one did just makes it deliberately obtuse and inane writing.

Gyges
Aug 4, 2004

NOW NO ONE
RECOGNIZE HULK

Stabbey_the_Clown posted:

I thought it was generally okay, although the obvious trap on the bridge was really stupidly obvious. It also didn't make a lot of sense because later on the head bad guy seemed really surprised that the girl he wanted to kidnap was under FBI protection. Until that point, I had thought that he had known about the FBI's involvement and Spader telling the FBI about the kidnap attempt was part of the plan to kidnap her.

It appears it was all a set up to stab her husband a few times so that she'd become frustrated with the blood stains and rip up the carpet, revealing his secret box. This somehow is supposed to help Spader's relationship with totally not his daughter Agent Keen. Of course there were a couple wrinkles, like one of the thugs getting ready to shoot her. Then again Spader could have super chess mastered it all to be more believable, knowing field agent dipshit would come to her aid.

So the whole vindictive dead man Lazarusing his way into the plot thing was part of Spader's smoke screen to get into a cushy situation with the FBI, expose the husband, and work with FBI Agent totally not his daughter. All of this extra needlessly complex because the Bosnian pawn had to think he was actually going to get his revenge so that he'd play Spader's game, which was itself actually a ploy to both gently caress with Keen and get Happy Slavic Bomb Man a chemical bomb.

Gyges fucked around with this message at 05:35 on Sep 24, 2013

SteveVizsla
Mar 19, 2009

Why do I always want to sock it to you so hard?
Lots of clear moments where they made glaring choices to fit their storyline that would never happen, but I'm a sucker for shows that take the hosed up route so I'll stick with it for a little longer. The zoo bothered me the most - all the expensive tourist traps in DC and they pick the zoo, a free place with a multitude of entrances and no turnstiles or stamps? They didn't even try to shoot at a spot that looks like the zoo, either.

HookShot
Dec 26, 2005
The Ukranian guy running off with the bomb and James Spader being James Spader were the only good parts about this show.

I honestly can't believe someone would compare it to the Person of Interest pilot.

Humbug Scoolbus
Apr 25, 2008

The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.
Clapping Larry

SouthLAnd posted:

I guess I should have specified hour long dramas.

Grimm and Hannibal. Nothing else really.

Waltzing Along
Jun 14, 2008

There's only one
Human race
Many faces
Everybody belongs here
How was it? Previews looked interesting but am curious what others thought.

BIG HEADLINE
Jun 13, 2006

"Stand back, Ottawan ruffian, or face my lumens!"

Tide posted:

The lovechild of The Rock and Silence of the Lambs.

Plot twist that none sees coming: she is the Spaders daughter

I think it's a bit looser and that Spader knew her father, her father saved his life, and there's some sort of 'bad guy's code' thing going on.

Either way, yes - there's a lot of Carnahan in this. The execution felt too much like watching the A-Team movie from the perspective of the guys getting hosed with - Carnahan is an expert (and I use that term loosely) at writing 'tense' situations in a way that even the dumbest person can get joy in saying "I saw that comin'."

NBC oversold this immensely, and it's going to blow up in their faces. Again.

BIG HEADLINE fucked around with this message at 06:52 on Sep 24, 2013

Robnoxious
Feb 17, 2004

Waltzing Along posted:

How was it? Previews looked interesting but am curious what others thought.
I liked it, but goons gotta goon and trash it within every fiber of it's being as far as this thread goes. I'm a big fan of rear end in a top hat Spader roles so I'm going in jaded. There's totally a Silence of the Lambs vibe going on and a lot of cross/double-cross dramatics that won't fly for very long. The FBI are really no better than Dexter's Miami Metro as far as competency. I thought the lead "Clarice" chick was pretty good and evoked empathy and pathos from me. Her silly star stitches ever her right eye was more comical than dramatic effect though.

I seem to recall Person Of Interest got the same course of disdain after it's pilot episode and well beyond before the worm finally turned.

Since I loves me some Spader I'm gonna ride with this pony.

On a scale of 1 to 10, I give The Blacklist a rating of DENNY CRANE!

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OG KUSH BLUNTS
Jan 4, 2011

This show sucks so badly. Name every overused procedural cliche possible and this pilot had it.

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