|
Put me in as a director. I demand that we acquire an MLS team and make soccer a thing in America.
|
#
?
Dec 18, 2013 23:42
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 16, 2024 16:46 |
|
|
I know next to nothing about Football beyond the fact that I like winning, making me a perfect choice for Board of Directors.
|
|
#
?
Dec 18, 2013 23:48
|
|
|
Names are taken up. I'll reopen them if/when our current directors get replaced. I've also chosen to set the presidency to a general name, more befitting a fan trust than a single person.  Instead of talking to the president when I need stuff via board meeting, I'll be coming to this LP. The questions I ask will be from what I can ask ingame, and I'll provide details on each of them when I ask. It'll be up to all of the readers (not just the named Directors) to determine our course of action. habeasdorkus fucked around with this message at 00:06 on Dec 19, 2013 |
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 00:01
|
|
|
If the board ever changes I would like to be a director. My qualifications are that I have a simple name, and I know a lot about curling.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 00:08
|
|
|
I'll take a director spot if there are any left, but name me Prince Charles.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 00:33
|
|
|
I like the look of the new team, seem to be a fair number of quick young guys with a fair bit of potential. Could make for some exciting football if they can get their act together on defense.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 00:35
|
|
|
the JJ posted:Put me in as a director. I demand that we acquire an MLS team and make soccer a thing in America. Soccer is a thing in the US! Sure, no one watches MLS on TV but it draws more fans on average than the NBA and NHL. Heck, it draws as many fans as the top French and Dutch leagues. It's not Brazil, but it's a long way from even half a decade ago. quote:Is FM14 remotely faster to play than the previous iterations? If you can you should demo the Football Manager Classic mode. I haven't tried it so I can't say how much less time it takes, but FM14 is just as much of a timesink as the older editions. quote:I like the look of the new team, seem to be a fair number of quick young guys with a fair bit of potential. Could make for some exciting football if they can get their act together on defense. I was surprised at how fast some of the players were, but their technical skills are worrisome. It's like a team of Theo Walcotts. It's certainly true that speed kills, though. habeasdorkus fucked around with this message at 02:38 on Dec 19, 2013 |
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 02:27
|
|
|
habeasdorkus posted:I was surprised at how fast some of the players were, but their technical skills are worrisome. It's like a team of Theo Walcotts. It's certainly true that speed kills, though. I'm always fuming when my defense gives away a goal like that.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 02:51
|
|
|
quote:I was surprised at how fast some of the players were, but their technical skills are worrisome. It's like a team of Theo Walcotts. It's certainly true that speed kills, though. Best.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 03:17
|
|
|
Chapter the Sixth: Enter the dragon. October 25, 2014-November 25, 2014 As I mentioned in the last update, we played a game the day after I came on board as manager. At Salisbury City, October 25, 2014 Skrill Premier  Since I'm lacking a coaching staff and familiarity with the players this should be a learning experience for everyone. I've instituted a 4-5-1, but the team isn't anywhere close to well versed in it, so if we get points here I'll consider it an auspicious beginning. After a first half that sees us hit them on the break twice I'm forced to weather a strong Salisbury push in the second where they come close to tying it up several times. Still, we win the match, and my first game as coach of Wrexham couldn't have gone better. We're now ten back of the playoff pace, and are tied with Tackleford City on points. Salisbury City 1-2 Wrexham Seeing as our 10 loan players are earning £5,645/wk, or about 18% of our wage budget, I send six of them home early, including one guy that was getting £1,400/wk all on his own and was our highest paid player. This will save us nearly 20,000 pounds, a not inconsiderable sum for a team of our size.  I also negotiate to keep four players for another 3 months, and in two of those negotiations I'm able to get their teams to pay all of their wages, freeing up another £1,045/wk.  I ended up sacking the entire staff, none of them were worth keeping. It cost us ~£28,000, which eats into our balance sheet, but none of them were useful and they would have cost us more in the long run while preventing us from bringing in new coaches and staff.  We're unable to afford coaches for the first team at the moment as the board says they can't find the money in the budget. We need a total of four more general coaches, another fitness coach, and another goalkeeping coach. For now our rear end Man will be stretched incredibly thin.  The U18 team is fully staffed, however. In retrospect I should have waited until we had a youth team worth training.  Everyone gets assigned to their new training, except the soon to depart loan players.  We also have 3 scouts now, half of what we had at Tackleford but all reasonably competent.  New in FM2014 is the ability to create detailed instructions for each individual player within a tactic. This allows you to create one set of instructions for your awesome Pirlo-esque midfield distributor and another for when your much less technically adept and creative backup is in to prevent the backup from trying to play the same way and giving away the ball constantly. So now I can have different instructions for my wingbacks compared to my fullbacks, tailored to their specific talents. This will either make us more awesome if I actually know what I'm doing tactically, or really screw us up if I don't.  We now have 3 tactics being prepared, two variants of a 4-5-1, one for attack and one for defense, and a base 4-4-2 in case things are going to poo poo in a match and I need to change things up. We're behind just about everyone else in the league when it comes to match preparation, so that's going to be a major focus for the next few months.   It's a good sign when my first team meeting has a positive impact on all of the players. Gaining their confidence is huge, and their belief in their manager is very important in bringing out their best performance.  Crap. Extending two of the loans is impossible because the end date of the original loan is past the short term loan cutoff at the end of November.  And no one is interested in our unwanted players. Which is just as well, considering that until January we're going to be shorthanded in a few areas due to the loans ending. I feel like I was given a false bill of goods when I signed on here.  What?!  Why didn't you just stay with the club then, you nitwit!  We're able to renew one loan. Joy.  Woah, a press conference ahead of our FA Cup match against Worcester. Haven't seen many of those yet. What should I say about this board? Hmm...  One of our loaners gives us a nice present, a Goal of the Month award. vs. Worcester, November 1, 2014 FA Cup, First Round  I tell the boys to, in the immortal words of 'Arry Redknapp, go out there and just loving run about a bit. Get us a victory and we're one step closer to facing off against a big team and bring in hundreds of thousands of pounds in match day revenue. It works, we lead one-nil at the half and seal the victory with Alan Tierney's first goal of the season off of a corner after the restart, a sign that my set piece tactics will continue to pay dividends. Wrexham 2-0 Worcester  Prize money is always nice.  Getting drawn against the team that just fired me? Much nicer.   Yeah, that's really not the way to talk to me, kid. I don't care what problems you had with the old manager, if you're giving me trouble I'm going to find a way to make you miserable. At Macclesfield Town, November 4, 2014 Skrill Premier  Macclesfield hasn't had any luck since I declined their offer to take over the team- they've fallen into last place. This is a game we need to be winning if we want to get into the playoff hunt. Bunel is so close to a goal right from the start, rattling a header off the crossbar on a corner and having a goal called back for offsides on a free kick in the first 20 minutes. Baker misses a one on one opportunity 15 minutes later. Despite not allowing a shot by Macclesfield in the first half we go into the lockers even. It looks like Macclesfield is going to hold on for a draw until the 89th minute, when Nsangou distributes a perfect ball to Holtham, which Holtham delivers to a sprinting Watts. Watts places a perfect pass to Nic Bull, and Bull slots it home to give us the lead. Macclesfield has a man sent off a minute later, and we win our third game in a row. Macclesfield Town 0-1 Wrexham  What does Welsh sports radio sound like? Welsh with a New York accent?  Tough poo poo, kid. I told you not to cross me. Plus, you're our only viable backup keeper.  This is what happens when you institute a new tactical policy midseason.  I didn't realize it but one of the players I'm trying to get rid of plays for the Faroe Island's national team. Ptak is blazing fast with a Pace of 19 and Acceleration of 16, but he can't do much else. He's also one of our more expensive players and is already 24, making him unlikely to improve. At Worcester, November 8, 2014 Skrill Premier  So I know I said in the last update that I shouldn't play Sumner and Thomas together. The problem is that Thomas is our only real left back, thus he's going to play a great deal with wingers who view the concept of defense as anathema to their flamboyant ways. Hopefully this doesn't come back to hurt us too much. Nsangou is proving to be very good at the sweeper-keeper role, setting up Thomas's delivery of a killer through ball to Cannon that results a goal two minutes into the game. Tierney adds his second goal in the last two games on a corner in the time it takes to watch an episode of Scrubs. Worcester is able to deny us a clean sheet in the second half, but we keep our lead and the three points. Worcester 1-2 Wrexham  The first decision to be made by the board is which team we're linked with. Our options are Blackpool (currently 21st in the Championship), Brighton and Hove Albion (15th in the Championship), Norwich City (6th in the Championship, relegated from the Premier League last year), and Charlton (5th in League One after relegation last year). Regardless of the link we'll earn an annual fee of roughly 33,000 pounds and get to host a yearly friendly where we are able to keep all the proceeds. I recommend the Canaries of Norwich City, but the choice is ultimately yours.  I was all excited when I saw so many Tackleford players in the Team of the Week. Then I remembered I got fired from Tackleford.  It's kind of neat that we actually have a reason to be off during the international breaks. Poor Neill Simon, he'd have actually gotten to start a game if we had to play while Nsangou was away.  Ah crud, Watts has been really good so far as our left winger. We've got a lot of depth up there, though, so I'm not panicked about him being out for 5 weeks. vs. Southport, November 15, 2014 Skrill Premier  Tierney remains on fire, with yet another goal off a corner. On this one he wasn't even marked. Tom “the Cannon” Cannon doubles our joy shortly after Tierney's header, and we take a firm lead into the second half. Southport fail to strike lucky on their opportunities and we have another clean sheet and another victory. Wrexham 2-0 Southport  This Wales.co.uk journalist is a dick. “Wily and not to be trusted” means that he'll twist your words in the worst possible way. “Unfriendly” means he's got motivation to do it. vs. Hednesford, November 22, 2014 FA Trophy, First Round  We've got our first FA Trophy match, and it's an enjoyable 90 minutes for the fans in the stands as we boss the entire game. A penalty gives us the lead just before the first whistle, while a very pretty piece of passing and an excellent effort by the Cannon sees us double that lead. Late in the game Sumner pounces on a ball ping ponging through the penalty area after a corner to treble it. It's a confident performance, and we seem unstoppable. Wrexham 3-0 Hednesford  You'd expect a 38 year old man to be more mature. I'm looking forward to when I have the stature to actually enforce my will upon these brats, as it is I'm just some random American who never even played professional soccer.  We have too many forwards as is, getting rid of Hughes would help us rebalance the squad.  Woah, this ref hands out a ton of cards. I'll be setting our tackling to soft to make sure we don't end up a man down. vs. Farnborough, November 25, 2014 Skrill Premier  One reason we've been doing so well is because we're playing the worst teams in the division. Our strongest opposition has been Worcester, a team that was just promoted and is hanging around the mid-table. But it's important to take care of business against the minnows, especially when you're at home, and playing against minnows may lead you to play your B team to save your legs for upcoming important matches can lead to unfortunate results. I try to rest players here, and if you look at just the stats you'd assume that it worked and we won this game by a multiple goal margin. Of course, even when it seems like everything is going according to plan, you can still get tripped up by bad luck. Wrexham 1-1 Farnborough  I can't complain about 13 points from five games. We haven't seen a meteoric rise in the standings, only going from 13th to 9th, but we've shaved five points off the gap between us and the playoffs and four points from the gap between us and table topping Morcambe. Our next match, the one I was resting our players for, is against Tackleford City in the FA Cup. I cannot express in words how much I desire to win that game. Voting for our Parent club will be open until Thursday the 19th at 5pm. The choices are Brighton and Hove, Blackpool, Charlton, and Norwich. 
habeasdorkus fucked around with this message at 07:18 on Dec 19, 2013 |
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 06:29
|
|
|
I've decided to do the next match, against Tackleford, as a Guardian style Minute-By-Minute. I'll be starting at 7pm EST on Thursday the 19th, it should take about an hour and 45 minutes to play. Feel free to drop by and make snide comments.
habeasdorkus fucked around with this message at 06:46 on Dec 19, 2013 |
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 06:37
|
|
|
habeasdorkus posted:I tell the boys to, in the immortal words of 'Arry Redknapp, go out there and just loving run about a bit. Team talks are just that much better when you do them through the window of your Range Rover. Norwich is the probably the best option for us. As a Director, I'll try to be around so I can bitch and moan about how our lads aren't getting stuck in properly.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 07:05
|
|
|
Stoked. I like the vids. Very pretty soccer from our boys. I'm okay with any parent team really.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 08:14
|
|
|
Sad I was too late on putting my name in for director. I'd like to be one when there are openings there. I have no qualifications, but I promise to bitch about how the pitch is so lovely, and that our stadium isn't like Wembley Stadium or Azteca. But as long as we aren't the worst in the league, I'm good. I trust your judgement so choose which Parent club you think is best.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 08:24
|
|
|
(Assertively) As a director, I am very pleased with the results so far. I agree that Norwich looks like the best choice for a parent club. Will there be anything else?
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 09:06
|
|
|
Norridge seems like the best bet, even if it means we might get players that are more interested in talking about tat in front of a knackered old sofa instead of playing.
|
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 09:07
|
|
|
Norwich is clearly the best.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 12:56
|
|
|
habeasdorkus posted:I've decided to do the next match, against Tackleford, as a Guardian style Minute-By-Minute. I'll be starting at 7pm EST on Thursday the 19th, it should take about an hour and 45 minutes to play. Feel free to drop by and make snide comments. If we're doing this right, we'll need twitter hashtags and reporters at the ground!
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 13:19
|
|
|
habeasdorkus posted:I've decided to do the next match, against Tackleford, as a Guardian style Minute-By-Minute. I'll be starting at 7pm EST on Thursday the 19th, it should take about an hour and 45 minutes to play. Feel free to drop by and make snide comments. Real-time Football Manager LP? Oh my. Next you'll be playing one day per day. Oh also, you should go with Brighton as your parent club. I'm pretty sure they've got a better youth system than Norwich so you're likely to get better kids on loan.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 14:20
|
|
|
habeasdorkus posted:our current centerback pairing would lose a race to a three legged turtle and a couple injuries could really hurt our ability to play defense. So we'll need some luck to get to the start of the new year, when we can start really changing the roster up. Have you tried looking at players out of contract? You can register them at any time, and while it might be a long shot there's a chance of at least getting a slightly pacier centre back. For the post-match stats is it possible to show us the passing % broken down by defence/midfield/attack like in FM13? It's quite a handy way of seeing where we're losing possession. Norwich seem the best choice for a parent club, unless any of the others have some cracking youngsters that we could take on loan. Also, this habeasdorkus posted:I've decided to do the next match, against Tackleford, as a Guardian style Minute-By-Minute. I'll be starting at 7pm EST on Thursday the 19th, it should take about an hour and 45 minutes to play. Feel free to drop by and make snide comments.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 14:53
|
|
|
Unless their Youth System has totally imploded already, Norwich is the best bet.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 15:42
|
|
|
Our borrowed players should be inbred and horribly disfigured. Lets have Norwich as our parent club!
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 15:54
|
|
|
I'm really not sure how you can look past Norwich here.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 17:34
|
|
|
Niric posted:Have you tried looking at players out of contract? You can register them at any time, and while it might be a long shot there's a chance of at least getting a slightly pacier centre back. I have, unfortunately there's no one I know about that would be a useful signing. Part of the problem is that all my scouting knowledge was reset to zero when I was fired from Tackleford, meaning that we don't have much knowledge of scouts. I could have sent my scouts digging through the various out of contract centerbacks, but that would almost certainly have been a waste of time. Niric posted:For the post-match stats is it possible to show us the passing % broken down by defence/midfield/attack like in FM13? It's quite a handy way of seeing where we're losing possession. Sure! I'm not too concerned about our passing completion rate. We're playing a much, much more direct style of play than we were at Tackleford, and our passing is set to put the ball into space where our players can run onto it. Even when we're in a counter-attack setup we're still hoofing the ball upfield to the wingers. It makes me feel like Tony Pulis. eta: Oh neat, 10,000 views. And only 1000 of them or so are mine, probably. habeasdorkus fucked around with this message at 18:09 on Dec 19, 2013 |
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 17:45
|
|
|
(Calmly) Norwich.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 18:18
|
|
|
Man, that's a lot of pace and stamina. If we could teach our wingers/wingbacks how to cross and plant a big, tall, strong center-forward on the opposing team's box, we could play REAL BRITISH FOOTBALL. Just run it down the side until the ball hits someone's head. As I said, I know poo poo about the game, but I suppose we could play for counters semi-effectively with the players we have? Pity that the fast/resilient players aren't very good at marking, otherwise we could pressure-mark the other team, steal the ball on their side of the pitch and use our speed to score. Anyway. Norwich sounds fine. As a director, I wanna say I support telling bench players to shut the gently caress up and sit down, unless they're, like, 18 and promising stars. Footballers are a bit assholish.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 18:23
|
|
|
Let's go with Norwich.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 19:05
|
|
|
Sure we'll take the parent club that was in the PL a year ago. Hello Norwich money.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2013 19:23
|
|
|
habeasdorkus posted:Sure! I'm not too concerned about our passing completion rate. We're playing a much, much more direct style of play than we were at Tackleford, and our passing is set to put the ball into space where our players can run onto it. Even when we're in a counter-attack setup we're still hoofing the ball upfield to the wingers. It makes me feel like Tony Pulis. That's not necessarily a bad thing! Cheers for all the info; you're doing a great job here. Looking forward to the minute-by-minute
|
|
#
?
Dec 20, 2013 00:51
|
|
|
Chapter the Seventh: Live from the Racecourse Grounds, it's the FA Cup on ITV. November 29, 2014 2:55pm GMT: Hello everyone, and welcome to the Guardian's second round coverage of the FA Cup, featuring a Conference National face-off between two teams fallen on hard times. We've got Tackleford City against Wrexham scheduled to start in just a few moments, and there's some buzz in the air here in Wales thanks to Manager Scott Brown's passionate comments yesterday to WalesOnline.co.uk about his desire to "show those [Tackleford] gits what they're missing." As you may know, Brown brought Tackleford City to promotion last year and established what many considered the best team in the league before being unceremoniously sacked in late September. Both Tackleford and Wrexham have been on a good run since Brown's change of employment, with Wrexham going undefeated in all competitions since his hiring. 2:57 GMT: Tackleford's lineup: Ian Ellis, Sam Edwards, Colin Standing, Andy Morris, John Allison, Michael Coulson, Simon O'Donnell, Michael Jones, Orson Duchamps, Billy Holsgrove and Callum Williams. 2:59 GMT: Wrexhams's lineup: Charlie Nsangou, Raymond Wright, Alan Tierney, Damian King, Daniel Thoomas, Stuart Simpson, Steven Reynolds, Justin Bailey, Darren Baker, Mike Sumner, and Tom Cannon. 3:01 GMT: Alan White from TEAMtalk.com fancies Tackleford City for this one, but he's not in the majority with Bolyesports having Wrexham as 6-4 favorites to win over Tackleford. 3:03 GMT: One question will be, how does Scott Brown handle the defense against Tackleford City? He ought to know the team as well as anyone, given that he built that team. Of course, considering he got fired, maybe he doesn't. 3:05 GMT: Peep peep and we're off! 2': Wrexham puts a cross into the box that can't find anyone, and Tackleford is able to race upfield on the return but can't find the final pass to unlock the defense. 3': Two corners for Wrexham that go begging. good defense by Tackleford. The game has been very much in Wrexham's favor so far. 5': Tackleford launches their first good attacking move, and forces Wrexham to put it into touch. Reader CymruIsSexy writes in "I don't get why Tackleford let Brown go. Sure he's a Yank and maybe he doesn't know tactics but so what? It's not like there's a tonne of good managers in this world." 7': Michael Coulson gets the ball in a dangerous space but doesn't manage to do anything with it as he's shut down by no less than three Wrexham defenders. 10': Ever since I said it was all Wrexham Tackleford has been bossing the pitch. Nsangou is forced to make a save on a corner. 11': Wrexham gets a free kick in a dangerous area but can't do anything with it. Bailey was closer to putting it into row Z than the net. 12': GOOOOOAL! Baker takes a surging run past Allison, and drops the ball back for Wright who slots it to Simpson who knocks it home. Wrexham 1, Tackleford nil! 14': Eustace Boyce writes from Tackleford "Brown got sacked because he was the type of guy like AVB who promises the moon if you give him a Ferrari and then proceeds to drive it like a yugo. Wrexham may field a good team while they have him but they'll never become real contenders." Nsangou makes a brilliant save to keep Tackleford off the post as I was reading that. 18': Mrs. Marple writes in to second Mr. Boyce and adds: "It's because of all the violence on television these days, what with your Games of Throne and Breaking Poorly. If only young men today read books." 19': Baker very nearly gets another for Wrexham but is just offside. Meanwhile, Colin Standing has gone down and is flopping about like a spavined trout. 22': John Rambo writes in to contradict Mrs. Marple: "Books? You mean like the Iliad, which was just a bunch of Greeks seeing how many greased up gym bunnies they could each slaughter? Books are the cause of the fall of western civilization!" Meanwhile, Wrexham has been caught offsides three times by my count in the last 4 minutes. 24': Michael Coulson has to be kicking himself, he was one on one with the keeper and couldn't put it away. Meanwhile at the other end of the pitch Ellis gets to a long ball just before Cannon. 26': Dr. Eugene Pangloss tuts: "Doesn't Mr. Rambo know that books didn't exist in antiquity? The Iliad was originally an oral tradition! It wasn't for hundreds of years after the first telling that it was written." 29': Tackleford has looked good in the past few minutes, really taking the game to Wrexham. Nothing to show for it yet except multiple corners. 31': Professor Chomsky posits: "Well, that shows the true culprit, language! Have you ever heard of a deaf mass murderer? I don't think so." 33': "Professor Chomsky has never heard of Joseph Mesa? Or Stalin? Or Beethoven? What a horrible argument to make." blusters Llewyn Gyndwr. 36': Meanwhile this game has settled into a rhythm. Tackleford presses forward but can't create a real chance, Wrexham surges on the counter but can't get a shot off, rinse, repeat. 38': Coulson continues to look like the best player on the field, but he can't dribble past the entire Wrexham defense on his own. Tackleford's defense meanwhile strips yet another Wrexham player of the ball in their own half and very quickly rotates the ball to Coulson. Wrexham replies by knocking the ball into touch. 42': Mrs. Marple bleats "I'll grant you Beethoven and Mesa, but whatever makes you think that this dashing young man was a murderer?" And now I'm imagining a meet cute between Mrs. Marple and Josef Stalin. Tackleford are clearly discomfited by that thought, knocking the ball out of play. 44': Oh! Williams just misses equalizing for Tackleford! Into the side netting! 45': We'll have 1 minute of extra time. 45+1': Peep! Wrexham managed a couple of attacking moves, but after the goal it was nearly all Tackleford. Brown will be happy to take a 1-0 lead into the half after that performance. Halftime thoughts: Both teams have had their moments where they've looked dangerous, it's just that Tackleford has had a lot more of them. Still, close encounters only counts in alien abductions and atomic weapons, so Wrexham has their lead. 45': Peep! We're off again, and we'll see how each manager adjusted at halftime. 46': Callum Williams is caught by the offsides trap and gives possession back to Wrexham. A nice piece of movement by the Red Dragons. 47': And it's another Tackleford opportunity gone begging. Sooner or later they're going to convert and then we'll see fireworks on the Wrexham sideline. 49': Wrexham is showing more gumption to start the half, pushing up higher and playing more aggressively. Has Brown decided that one goal won't be enough? 51': @JANEAWESOME tweets: "Why do you need violence in novels? A good marriage plot is eversomuch more fun! #mbm #FireAndBlood" 53': Coulson makes a ripping run down the right side, but can't do anything with his cross. Tackleford is playing notably harder tackling this half, which befits their name. 56': "Marriage is just a perpetual state of cold war." sniffs @69BertyRussell69, who's probably a lifelong bachelor. Meanwhile, footymachy has taken over the field as Tackleford and Wrexham players swipe each other's legs out from under them. Still no yellow cards despite 8 Tackleford fouls. 58': Through the first fifteen minutes both sides are just gifting the ball to the opposition. It's like watching two people hold the doors open for each other at the entrance to a shop. 60': We have our first substitution, Dax Terry is coming on for Billy Holsgrove. 63': Two corners and a throw in for Tackleford, and they can't make anything of it. Callum Williams gets the closest, banging a header into the side netting. 65': John Rambo replies to Mr. Russell: "Well, you can blame books for that. Just look at the Lysistrata, that was a war by the women against their husbands!" 67': Michael Coulson is going to be frowning his sorrows if he can't score in this match, he keeps finding himself in good positions and can't convert. 70': As expected, an indignant Aristophanes devotee rises to challenge Mr. Rambo's mistaken recollection: "The Lysistrata was all about ending an actual war, you twerp! The ladies of Athens and Sparta took over the treasury and held off the sexytime until peace was made!" yelps Ben Johnson. 72': We're seeing Luke Holtham warm up on the sidelines for Wrexham, he'll be replacing Daniel Thomas at left back. 75': Tackleford has been having no luck, despite largely controlling play this half. They have 14 shots on the day, but only 3 on target. 76': GOOOOOOOAL! Cannon with a shocking miss, all alone in front of the goal! But no worries as he slots home a cross right afterwards! Dos a cero, Wrexham! 77': Tackleford has taken off Callum Williams and Colin Standing to bring on Chris Burns and Bobby Oriogun. They have got it all to do now. Wrexham is replacing Cannon, who came up limping after that missed shot, with Danny Hopkins. Brown looks elated on the sidelines right now, and, yes, I believe he is flipping off the Tackleford fans behind the Wrexham goal. That'll be a fine from the FA. 81': Tackleford presses forward again, but this Wrexham team has been excellent at snuffing out decent chances. Despite having 14 shots to Wrexham's 6, Tackleford has had exactly as many shots on goal as the home side. 83': Brown's teams have been known to cough up leads late in games and Tackleford certainly is aware of this considering how often they did it while he was at the helm. So this game isn't over quite yet, but time is running out as Duchamps laces one beyond the far post for yet another Wrexham goal kick. 85': I've just received an email from Mr. Rambo stating that he and Mrs. Marple have begun exchanging snapchats with each other and plan to elope to Blackpool this weekend. MBMs, bringing you odd love stories since whenever we started them. 86': Hopkins is denied a dagger through Tackleford's heart by the post, but with four minutes plus stoppage time left I expect it would only serve to make revenge feel that much better. 89': Nsangou is in no hurry to take this goal kick, it's truly dire straits for Tackleford City. That ain't workin', Wrexham's how you do it. 90': Two minutes of stoppage time. 90'+1: Bailey passes to Wright. Wright holds it. Holds it. Holds it. Good, British timewasting there. 90'+1: GOOOAL! Hopkins splits the Tackleford defenders and rifles it past the keeper! 3-0 Wrexham! 90'+2: GOOOOAL! Tackleford finally scores on an incisive breakaway by Bobby Oriogun, but it's far too little too late. 3-1 Wrexham. 90'+3: Peep! That does it, Wrexham walks away with a victory over Brown's old team! Final thoughts in a moment. Final Thoughts: Well, that's everything Coach Brown could have wanted facing his former team for the first time. I'm sure he's in the locker room now congratulating his boys. Meanwhile, this was another typical Tackleford performance, they dominated possession and had more than twice as many shots as Wrexham and failed to come close to a victory. Still, all credit to Wrexham, who looked exceptional today, and to Man of the Match wingback Raymond Wright who earned two assists and seemed like he was everywhere on the pitch defensively.  Match Highlights habeasdorkus fucked around with this message at 02:59 on Dec 20, 2013 |
|
#
?
Dec 20, 2013 01:01
|
|
|
So, where's this minute by minute happening? I got a beer ready like it's a real game.
|
|
#
?
Dec 20, 2013 01:02
|
|
|
right, here, i'll be updating the above post live.
|
|
#
?
Dec 20, 2013 01:08
|
|
|
Just in time for this - looking forward to it  God I hope we wreck Tackleford - what would make it all the more sweet is if they offered you back the head coach job so you could tell them to get hosed.
|
|
#
?
Dec 20, 2013 01:09
|
|
|
Got my beer and chips. Time for some footie. Make sure the lads get stuck in real proper like. Show those Tackleford fools who the (eventual) best team in Wales is! Edit: That's right! Get stuffed Tackleford! 1-0! rizzen fucked around with this message at 01:22 on Dec 20, 2013 |
|
#
?
Dec 20, 2013 01:12
|
|
|
If there isn't needless amounts of punning in this live coverage then... well, it'll be a lot better than the usual Guardian coverage, is what. Edit: Who needs Spanish tiki-taka when you have Welsh know-how!
|
|
#
?
Dec 20, 2013 01:21
|
|
|
It's not a proper Guardian MBM unless you try to provoke a silly debate about something fairly meaningless...like which was the best Wrexham home kit or which Tackleford is most likely to snub the ex-gaffer at full time? 1-0, get in! 'Mon the Dragons!
|
|
#
?
Dec 20, 2013 01:23
|
|
|
I got myself a take-away curry. They eat those at home on the other side of the pond right?
|
|
#
?
Dec 20, 2013 01:25
|
|
|
Niric posted:It's not a proper Guardian MBM unless you try to provoke a silly debate about something fairly meaningless...like which was the best Wrexham home kit or which Tackleford is most likely to snub the ex-gaffer at full time? Oh, that's going to happen.
|
|
#
?
Dec 20, 2013 01:30
|
|
|
4 offsides with the pace we have?! Those lads need a bollocking (or better off-the-ball stats)
|
|
#
?
Dec 20, 2013 01:33
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 16, 2024 16:46 |
|
|
Suck our asses, you purple shits.  Go Wrexham!
|
|
#
?
Dec 20, 2013 01:38
|
|