Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Locked thread
I Before E
Jul 2, 2012


Holy poo poo. On behalf of WWF, I commend you.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Der-Wreck
Feb 13, 2006
Friday nights are for Wapner!

I gotta say, that was one helluva PPV! Well done!

Junpei Hyde
Mar 15, 2013




Yeah, I'll admit that was all kinds of great.

IcePhoenix
Sep 18, 2005

Take me to your Shida

Very awesome PPV indeed, did not disappoint (constant misspellings of Cleveland aside)!

I am definitely tuning my fake TV to WCW for monday night.

Abrasive Obelisk
May 2, 2013

I joined th
ROVPACK IN THE HOOUUUUSE!
:vince:
he still knows...
Hot drat that was great! So we got Anderson/Benoit/Hall/Nash as the Horsemen? That seems incredible.

Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮
There is an erroneous report regarding the six-man tag. Rey Misterio, Jr. did not do any move called a '619'.

He never did that move in WCW, Sanguinia

Skunkrocker
Jan 14, 2012

Your favorite furry wrestler.
Booyaka booyaka! :v:

IcePhoenix
Sep 18, 2005

Take me to your Shida

CaptainYesterday posted:

There is an erroneous report regarding the six-man tag. Rey Misterio, Jr. did not do any move called a '619'.

He never did that move in WCW, Sanguinia

He sort of did, but he did it as a "I got thrown into the ropes but I'm not coming back towards you haha what now" move instead of a "kick/shin/knee the conviniently placed opponent in the face" move.

Evil Badman
Aug 19, 2006

Skills include:
EIGHT-FOOT VERTICAL LEAP


Is this Raw or Superstars? What happened to Superstars?

Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮

Evil Badman posted:

Is this Raw or Superstars? What happened to Superstars?

Obviously, this is Thursday Raw Thursday.

Evil Badman
Aug 19, 2006

Skills include:
EIGHT-FOOT VERTICAL LEAP

CaptainYesterday posted:

Obviously, this is Thursday Raw Thursday.

WE'RE OUTTA TIME SEE YOU ON LIVEWIRE

Abrasive Obelisk
May 2, 2013

I joined th
ROVPACK IN THE HOOUUUUSE!
:vince:
he still knows...

Evil Badman posted:

Is this Raw or Superstars? What happened to Superstars?

Yeah, it's superstars.

Sanguinia
Jan 1, 2012

~Everybody wants to be a cat~
~Because a cat's the only cat~
~Who knows where its at~

IcePhoenix posted:

Very awesome PPV indeed, did not disappoint (constant misspellings of Cleveland aside)!


Why does my autocorrect have an incorrect spelling for Cleveland set up as the default correct spelling? That's loving bizarre.

CaptainYesterday posted:

There is an erroneous report regarding the six-man tag. Rey Misterio, Jr. did not do any move called a '619'.

He never did that move in WCW, Sanguinia

Whoops, sorry. I'll edit that.

Also either nobody figured out the true identity of the usenet poster or the power of contempt is hilariously retroactive so everyone purposefully ignored the clues.

IcePhoenix
Sep 18, 2005

Take me to your Shida

Sanguinia posted:

Also either nobody figured out the true identity of the usenet poster or the power of contempt is hilariously retroactive so everyone purposefully ignored the clues.

Option C: so obvious it wasn't worth mentioning. I still enjoyed it, though.

Skunkrocker
Jan 14, 2012

Your favorite furry wrestler.

Sanguinia posted:

Also either nobody figured out the true identity of the usenet poster or the power of contempt is hilariously retroactive so everyone purposefully ignored the clues.

The Miz doesn't know how to use a computer. :colbert:

Sanguinia
Jan 1, 2012

~Everybody wants to be a cat~
~Because a cat's the only cat~
~Who knows where its at~

IcePhoenix posted:

Option C: so obvious it wasn't worth mentioning. I still enjoyed it, though.

Well yeah, but I still expected a "tee hee, high school wrestleman on the internet," comment. Or maybe I'm just to enamored with my own supposed cleverness. :smith:

IcePhoenix
Sep 18, 2005

Take me to your Shida

Sanguinia posted:

Well yeah, but I still expected a "tee hee, high school wrestleman on the internet," comment. Or maybe I'm just to enamored with my own supposed cleverness. :smith:

I wasn't trying to put you down, I liked it. I think nobody commented on it because you laid it on pretty thick so there wasn't really any mystery by the end.

Q7kid
Jul 24, 2009

Sanguinia posted:

Whoops, sorry. I'll edit that.

We'll just chalk young Mr. Mizanin up as having an active imagination--though Misterio may have used a springboard legdrop or splash intermittently at that point, it certainly wasn't called Droppin' The Dime (a name related to "619," after all).

JoeRules
Jul 11, 2001
RAW and Nitro ran earlier tonight. Posts should be up shortly.

WCW, we'll run SatNight whenever you've got it ready. If you've got it ready to go tomorrow, I'll do it then, otherwise I'll run it at Hangover O'Clock on Wednesday.

I Before E
Jul 2, 2012



Raw report by TerryFunkadelic1978@hotmail.com posted:

Just got back from another Raw taping.

There were 4 dark matches, which at least gave me a while to get my nachos. Bradshaw, with some guy with a huge moustache called Dutch, pinned Reckless Youth in a dull match. I don't think Bradshaw and Dutch are super good together, to be honest. Rick Martel, who I didn't know was even back in WWF, went over Doink, another surprise, in a better match than the previous, but nothing special, though seriously, how good would you expect a Doink match to be? HHH versus Matt Hardy was a little underwhelming, as HHH didn't look all that inspired. But Chris Jericho and Roddy Piper versus Taz and Rhyno was actually pretty fun, even if Piper wasn't at his best. He can still go, and he and Jericho are gangbusters together!

For the show itself, it started with a fun little opening promo where Shawn, Bulldog, Taker, Goldust, Yoko, and Vader all came out and had a jaw session, and Gorilla came down to set a trios main event before it got violent. Fuji and Gorilla were the drags of the lot, but it was still fun.

After, there was a dullsville King Of The Ring match between Stone Cold and Jeff Hardy, but Austin looked good. He went over, and then he and HHH cut a promo on Owen, about how Owen was lucky not to have to face HHH in King Of The Ring, which was better than the match at least.

Then Warrior cut a promo and DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN SON. "AAAAAAAH, MANKIIIIIIND *SKROOOONK* YOU DO NOT KNOW THE DEPTHS THE WARRIOR HAS PLUMBED, OR THE HEIGHTS THAT HE CAN REACH! YOU SAY THE PLACES YOU CAN GO ARE THOSE OF A DARKNESS SO PROFOUND, SO DESPAIRING, SO HELLISH, THAT MY DESTRUCITY WILL CRUMBLE IN THEIR WAKE! YOU ARE WROOOOONG, MANKIIIIIIIND! *SKROOOOOONK* NOT ONLY HAVE I PREVAILED OVER DARKER FORCES THAN YOU, I HAVE SOUGHT A TRAVELING COMPANION! HIS NAME IS PAUL BEARER, AND LIKE HIS NAMESAKE HE SHALL CARRY ME INTO THE CORE OF THE EARTH, TO A HEAT AND A DARKNESS YOU DO NOT, WILL NOT, AND CAN NEVER POSSESS! *SKROOOOOOOONK*" This was some fun poo poo, and it was obvious Warrior and Bearer know how to work a crowd.

Then Edge and Jake Roberts beat the Kid Rockers in a short snorer, and Kid Rockers had an argument, which stunk even more than the match. Uuuugh.

Owen Hart had a fun little promo about winning the King Of The Ring, being one of the best wrestlers on the roster, and Stone Cold's taste in alcohol, which was a little harsh. It gets you drunk the same as anything else. Cornette was also fun.

Then there was an IC Title match between Tatanka(BUFFALO) and Tom Pritchard, which ended after Chris Candido attacked Pritchard for a DQ. It was OK, I guess, but I don't get why Sunny and Pritchard were still together. Then Candido attacked him after the match, and somehow managed to be the worst part of the segment.

Then there was a fun little video package where Rick Martel took photos with children, gave autographs, and said that charity is one of the most beautiful things a person can do. It was a marked improvement over the previous segment, and I can't wait to see his debut on Raw next week.

So then The Gunns and Kaientai, which is apparently Tajiri and Sho Funaki, had a match together, non-title, and eeeeeh. And The Dudleyz came out after to mock them, which was also eeeeeeeeeeeh.

So then Mankind came out in what's pretty much always my favorite part of the show, and he brought a mic! "You bring your traveling companion, Warrior, you bring anyone you can find that's willing to stare into these eyes and see my pain, feel my torment. And Ahmed Johnson, I would say that I'm sorry for the things I'm about to do to you, the pain I'm about to put you through... but I'm not. I won't regret anything I'm about to do to you, because I've seen far worse." I love listening to him, and drat if I'm not excited for their match. Mankind versus Ahmed Johnson was about as good as an Ahmed match gets, not much. Mankind won with the Mandible Claw.

Then Mr. Fuji came out to explain that Kaientai entered the King Of The Ring tournament as a unit, somehow, so Hakushi, who is for some reason a part of this Kaientai outfit, will wrestle in Tajiri's stead against Jericho tonight. Uuuuuuuuuuh, okay? The match was meh, as Jericho was probably tired from his match earlier. But he cut a drat good promo after. "You've been everywhere there is to go in America, Steve, and I respect that. But I have something you don't: international experience. I've wrestled on every continent on this Earth, I've built my skill against every style going today. Everything you learned down South with Flair, Sting, and all of those guys, it just doesn't measure up to what I've learned. I AM THE UNCROWNED KING OF THE WORLD WRESTLING FEDERATION, STONE COLD, AND IF THERE'S ONE THING I KNOW, IT'S THAT IF YOU COME AT THE KING, YOU'D BETTER NOT MISS! COME AT ME STEVE! THIS SUNDAY! AT THE KING OF THE RING! SEE IF YOU HAVE THE SKILL TO DEPOSE KING JERICHO THE LIONHEARTED, because if you can't, you will NEVER! EEEEEVER! Be the same... again!"

Then it was time for the main, where HBK, Yoko, and Taker faced off against Goldust, Bulldog, and Vader. It ended when Vader powerbombed HBK and was able to keep Taker away while Bulldog distracted Yoko, so Goldust stacked up HBK for a pin. Fun main event, even if Yoko was looking out of breath near the end, the lardo. Cornette and the heels all gloated over HBK after the show, and for some reason, Cornette wasn't so great here.

Still, good fun, solid B-.

I Before E fucked around with this message at 06:12 on Dec 31, 2013

Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮


Nitro Results from ohmysweetakane posted:

Hello wrestling fans! It is I, Omsa, giving you IN PERSON WCW Monday Nitro results for those of you who couldn't watch last night!

There was a lot of business before the show. Jeff Jarrett(!) came out with Dan "The Beast" Severn(!!) and announced that he is an MMA enthusiast, a master of wrestling, boxing, jiu-jitsu, kenpo karate, krav maga, and pencak silat, and he'll kill a man with a guillotine choke or a one-inch punch. He then had a match against Jerry Lynn where he tried to put on UFC-like submission moves, but then did a figure-four leglock to make Lynn tap out. Severn wasn't pleased, and neither was the crowd. Good match, though.

The Faces of Fear then came out with some guy named James Mitchell and beat the Public Enemy. Whoever this Mitchell guy is, he doesn't work well with the Faces of Fear.

It was of hardcore vs. lucha in the next match, as former ECW stallworths Rob Van Dam and Sabu defeated Psicosis and El Dandy. RVD didn't look too good out there.

The last dark match was V.K. Wallstreet and Diamond Dallas Page beating the Rock 'n Roll Express. Wallstreet looked a bit weary out there.

Finally, the pyro hits, and we're live on TNT!

First up came Arn Anderson, who cut a promo railing against Ric Flair, saying he's lost his touch. He's hired Nash and Hall as 'independent contractors', noting that they work for him, not WCW. He said that, while Flair wasted his money on booze and women and Lear jets, Anderson reinvested in the Horsemen brand. He said his New Horsemen will do what the Four Horsemen originally intended to do: be champions. He demanded a World title match. Commissioner Curt Hennig came out and said he won't hand him a title shot, but he can earn one against another man who won at the Great American Bash, Randy Savage!

The Steiner Brothers defeated the Shark and Hugh Morrus when the Steiners hit the two-man elevated bulldog on Morrus.

Ron Simmons and Teddy Long came out to the ring. Long cut a promo praising the new champion while Simmons flashes the gold. Konnan interupted, demanding a rematch. While Simmons looked ready, Long delayed the match until the next Nitro. Konnan did great, but Long was AWFUL.

Backstage, commissioner Curt Hennig was in his office when Deputy Commissioner Rick Rude enters, looking extremely perturbed. Hennig asked why he looked frustrated, and Rude explains that he had just been chewed out by Jushin "Thunder" Liger's interpreter, who communicated that Liger was furious with being pinned by Rey Misterio Jr. and left in the lurch by his partners at last night's Great American Bash. Rude said Liger wants an opportunity to redeem himself tonight. Hennig looked thoughtful, and finally decides that, despite first-round matches in the Cruiserweight Title tournament remaining, he will make an exception in light of the circumstances--tonight, Jushin "Thunder" Liger will meet Rey Misterio Jr. in the first quarterfinal match of the Cruiserweight Title tournament! Rude, in his small role, looked fantastic.

The Giant then came out and helped himself into the ring, holding the title up high. An official comes and handed him a microphone and he explained that no one thought he could pull it off, but he successfully defended the title against everyone Sullivan threw at him. He took on the entire Dungeon and defeated them, even The Great Muta! It takes great strength and ability to pull off such a stunt, but he's one of the few men on the planet with that ability. He held the belt up again and leaves, giving high fives to fans on his way out.

The Nobility came out and, via King Steven Regal, issued an open challenge to any "commoner" in the audience to face a member of the Nobility. They picked some Canadian guy with a short haircut named Lance out of the audience to take on Squire David Taylor. Let me tell you, Taylor must've done something wrong backstage, because Lance won! And it wasn't even close!

Kevin Sullivan then entered the commissioner's office looking like a broken man--he grabbed Commissioner Hennig by the shirt collar and explained that he's lost the Dungeon of Doom, lost his allies, his manager, and his feud with his former charge, The Giant. Hennig pushed Sullivan off of him and says, while he is not terribly sympathetic to Sullivan's plight, he will give him an opportunity--one final match with The Giant next week on Nitro for the WCW World Heavyweight Championship. If Sullivan wins, he won't get the Dungeon back, but he will be able to claim victory and vengeance over The Giant, and he'll be the measuring stick in WCW. Sullivan appeared to brighten at this prospect and prepares to depart...but Hennig advised him that, if he loses, he will never again get a shot at the WCW World Heavyweight Title. Sullivan pondered this for a moment, then finally said, "What does it matter? I have nothing else to lose." Hennig nodded in assent as Sullivan leaves.

Rey Misterio, Jr. upset Jushin "Thunder" Liger in a quarterfinal match of the Cruiserweight Title tournament. The upstart Misterio put in an exceedingly strong performance, while Liger really seemed to look off his game and has no answers for Misterio's high-speed attack. Misterio picked up the clean pinfall win with a springboard huracanrana. Nevertheless, these two don't have good chemistry.

Big Bubba Rogers cut a promo, announcing that he doesn't need the Dungeon of Doom anymore, and that they were holding him back. He's now enjoying his sweet, sweet freedom, and he's got a new partner: One Man Gang! The Freedom Towers (as they are now known) are gunning for that Number 1 spot, and nobody will stand in their way.

The Freedom Towers defeated the Nasty Boys after Bubba hit the sidewalk slam on Sags and One Man Gang hit the 747 Splash. Jerry Sags didn't do too well.

V.K. Wallstreet came out to cut a promo on the American Males. He congratulated them for their victory at the Great American Bash, though he says they should, in theory, pay dearly for taking his hard-earned money and spending it on their trendy outfits, or else throwing it to fat rednecks like the fans in attendance. However, he explained that he's made an incredible fortune rebuilding the York Foundation he represented in the early 1990s as Wallstreet Enterprises, and he saw something in the Males at GAB--perhaps it's time to share the wealth. He wants to bring one of them under his wing and give them access to untold fortune...but only one. First come, first serve, and Wallstreet says that he intends to destroy the one who doesn't accept utterly.

Glacier video teaser--this time, he flies in slo-mo from seemingly out of nowhere to hit the Cryon-Splash on a robed, unidentified victim. Again, a "Blood Runs Cold" title card appears before impact, which dissolves to "GLACIER."

They showed stills of last night's Cleveland Street Fight. Apparently, neither the Road Warriors nor Harlem Heat made the show.

Backstage, Lex Luger geared up for his tag match tonight reuniting him with his friend and partner Sting. The Stinger himself barges in and advises Lex that, while they both may have a problem with the Nobility after the Great American Bash, he and Luger have not resolved their issues and will continue to have problems as long as Lex holds his TV Title above his friendships. Lex tries to find the words to refute Sting's arguments, but can't do it in a timely enough fashion before Sting storms off again. Both guys acted well.

Dusty Rhodes interviewed Earl Robert Eaton about his and King Steven Regal's upcoming match against Sting and Lex Luger. Rhodes asked Eaton how it will feel when Sting and Luger "put a whuppin' all over" him for the sneak attack at GAB; Eaton, in return, asked Rhodes how it felt when Regal made him tap out in Rhodes's own specialty match. Rhodes is furious, but Eaton simply flashed the "V for victory" and departs.

King Steven Regal and Earl Robert Eaton defeated Sting and Lex Luger when Luger accidentally nailed Sting with a running forearm, allowing Regal to pick up the pin. Luger didn't wrestle so good tonight (is there a bug going around backstage?)

Sting shoved Lex Luger following the match's conclusion, and Lex tackled him to the ground. Staff members are out to pull the two partners apart, while Regal looked on with a gleeful smirk from ringside, flashing the "V for victory."

Dusty Rhodes interviewed Hulk Hogan prior to the main event match between Randy Savage and Arn Anderson, and he asked Hulk how he feels after losing to Savage at the Great American Bash. Hogan said that he's impressed that Savage finally showed a little sack and stepped out of his shadow for one brief shining moment, but Hulk is and will always be the real world champion. Hogan thrusted the AWA World Heavyweight Championship in Dusty's face, advising Rhodes that as long as Hulk holds the gold, no one can claim to be better than him.

They then ran stills from last night's Flair/Anderson match and aftermath.

In the main event of the evening, Arn Anderson defeated Randy Savage after Scott Hall distracted the official, allowing Kevin Nash to hit a Jackknife on Savage and Arn to pick up the pin. Much like last night, Anderson slowed down near the end of the match. Post-match, Hulk Hogan came out to brain Savage with the AWA Title as he began to return to his feet, then grabed him by the hair and held the AWA title in Savage's face. Hogan then tells him that "you're not on my level--you will never be on my level. Hulkamania will always be strongest...brother."

Overall, it was a good show. I give it 3 1/4 okonomiyaki out of 5 (that's about a B-)

I Before E
Jul 2, 2012


THIS SUNDAY, CATCH ALL THE LATEST WWF ACTION AT KING OF THE RING!

-In our main event, Shawn Michaels defends the WWF title against Jim Cornette's British Bulldog!
-The final 3 matches in the King Of The Ring tournament are held! Who will wear the crown? The newly heroic Edge? The rollicking Stone Cold Steve Austin? The magnificent Chris Jericho? Or the bitter, unpredictable Owen Hart?
-The Ultimate Warrior faces off against the mad, macabre, monstrous Mankind!
-The Deadman, Undertaker, faces the Phantom Of The Matinee, Goldust, as Goldust has pledged to exact karmic retribution by stealing Undertaker's urn!
-Tom Pritchard and Chris Candido, the former Bodydonnas, explode, as Candido challenges for Pritchard's Intercontinental belt! Weeks of bitterness and strife have all led up to this!
-The Smoking Gunns face the Dudley Boys in terrific tag team action for the straps!
-The behemoths themselves, Yokozuna and Big Van Vader, face off!

CALL YOUR CABLE PROVIDER NOW!

Also, someone else do the poster next time, please. I'm no good at this.

I Before E fucked around with this message at 23:26 on Dec 31, 2013

Skunkrocker
Jan 14, 2012

Your favorite furry wrestler.

I Before E posted:



Also, someone else do the poster next time, please. I'm no good at this.

Sorry. I work for wcw. :v:

Maxwell Lord
Dec 12, 2008

I am drowning.
There is no sign of land.
You are coming down with me, hand in unlovable hand.

And I hope you die.

I hope we both die.


:smith:

Grimey Drawer
That actually looks like a good card. WWF hasn't done the best job hyping it but there's potential.

I'm curious where the WCW main event scene will go from here. I like The Giant but if they're not careful he'll be overshadowed by the other things happening on the card.

Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮

Maxwell Lord posted:

That actually looks like a good card. WWF hasn't done the best job hyping it but there's potential.

I'm curious where the WCW main event scene will go from here. I like The Giant but if they're not careful he'll be overshadowed by the other things happening on the card.

Considering Arn Anderson is challenging the Giant for the title, I think we're OK.

Q7kid
Jul 24, 2009

CaptainYesterday posted:

Considering Arn Anderson is challenging the Giant for the title, I think we're OK.

Interesting timing...

All WCW bookers: check the discussion topics on the booking doc. There is a complication that requires absolutely everyone's attention and input at your earliest convenience.

UPDATE: A decision has been reached. Thanks for the prompt action of everybody who was able to contribute.

Q7kid fucked around with this message at 22:59 on Dec 31, 2013

Skunkrocker
Jan 14, 2012

Your favorite furry wrestler.
Will have an answer on that within the hour.

your friend sk
Dec 10, 2005

(ヤイケス!)


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gsNaR6FRuO0

quote:

Welcome to Prograps Unlimited, Issue 2!

It seems that my HARD-HITTING JOURNALISM hasn't gone unnoticed, because my inbox has been packed with JUICY RUMORS since last week.

Ratings Update: WCW's Great American Bash did a buyrate of 2.43, up from Slamboree's 2.20. Bash still didn't reach last month's In Your House, which earned a 2.61 for WWF. Nitro went down to a 2.93 rating, RAW up to a 2.38.

Tatanka! Fumble-o! The rosters at WCW and WWF are both packed to the brim, which is making morale bad enough. But some people are making it even worse by complaining to everyone backstage about their pushes. Those men? WCW's Steve "Mongo" McMichael, and WWF's Tatanka. Honestly I'd be happy just getting a paycheck if I were either of them.

Creative Appealin', Bonus Stealin' Son of a Gun: Ric Flair is said to be furious after his (great!) match with Arn Anderson at the Great American Bash. Apparently he didn't agree with the booking, but WCW Creative went with their plans anyway. My understanding is that they tried to pay him off with a $1000 bonus, but it did nothing to impress the man living the life of Rolexes, limos, and jets.

Monday Night War Propaganda: Vince McMahon and Ted Turner are ready to fire shots in the Monday Night Cold War, with each proposing a gimmick to their creative teams attacking the competition. It's said that neither boss is REQUIRING that the gimmicks be used, but it's hard to say no to the guy who sets your budget.

It's a Shoot, Brother: Papa Ted has been very public about his hatred of the new Ultimate Fighting Championship, but Eric Bischoff and his writers seem to have a different opinion. Expect a certain great southern wrestler to make his way to WCW programming soon with an MMA gimmick.

The Ball's in the King's Court: WWF almost lost Jerry Lawler recently when he tried to leave for a permanent role at USWA. USWA is the Tennesse promotion WWF recently broke ties with during their failed attempt to sign Jeff Jarrett. Lawler has been a huge star for USWA, but with the promotions' working agreement broken Lawler was ready to choose Memphis over Stanford. Luckily (?) for WWF, he signed a pay-per-appearance with USWA instead and can still work for both promotions.

Speaking of Developmental... WWF has gotten the greenlight for a dev territory in New England. My source neglected to give the full name, but "HWA" will be looking for a TV deal very soon. WWF has also been sending out developmental contracts, so we may be seeing a lot of new names in the coming months.

Look at That Mass! WWF has released professional lumps of humanity The Bushwhackers, Duke Droese, Dennis Knight (Phineas I. Godwin), and Nelson Knight (King Mabel).

Contract Conundrum: Finally, a PGU exclusive: WCW has big plans for a particular wrestler, but he's said to be holding out for a massive contract extension. WCW doesn't want you to know this, but we'll hear something soon one way or the other for sure.

Don't forget to check in next week for more BIG SCOOPS from the world of pro wrestling!

S.K.

Q7kid
Jul 24, 2009

WWF has had a lot of kind words for us recently, so I don't mean to be too harsh, but man, how bad did they screw up the USWA thing?

long-ass nips Diane
Dec 13, 2010

Breathe.

You cut the Bushwhackers??????

Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮

Swagger Dagger posted:

You cut the Bushwhackers??????

Time for WCW to sign the Tallywhackers!

(this may or may not be happening)

Xerzes
May 16, 2012


The devil made us do it.

JoeRules
Jul 11, 2001
This week's B-shows have been run. KOTR runs tomorrow, WWF'ers.

NutritiousSnack
Jul 12, 2011
Can I still sign up as a booker, this looks fun as hell.

Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮


an 8 year old CaptainYesterday posted:

Hello, everyone! This is what happened on WCW Saturday Night!

There were four matches before the show aired! New signing Christian Cage went over the Mauler with an inverted double-underhook facebuster! Cage was off his game!

Men at Work (with James Mitchell) defeated The Public Enemy when Chris Kanyon hits a reverse legsweep faceslam on Johnny Grunge! Perennial jobber Kanyon looked stronger than one might traditionally expect, dazzling with his offense, but Kanyon and Mitchell don't mix well! Rocco Rock was off his game tonight!

Glacier beat Hugh Morrus with a Cryon-Splash, a massive diving splash! They had good chemistry, even though Glacier wasn't that good tonight!

James Mitchell showed up again, this time managing the Freedom Towers! They beat Fire & Ice! Mitchell, who seems to be rotating through prospective clients in these dark matches, distracted Train long enough for Bubba to avoid a Train Wreck from the second turnbuckle, and Bubba rolls him over for the pin!

Then the show started!

In the seventh first-round Cruiserweight Title tournament match, Dean Malenko defeated Blitzkrieg with the Texas cloverleaf! Match of the night, even if the crowd didn't care! Malenko looked great!

Lex Luger defeated Sgt. Buddy Lee Parker with the Torture Rack to retain the WCW Television Title! Luger did an awesome job! Sting joined the commentary team to discuss the worsening relationship between himself and Lex Luger, as well as King Steven Regal's apparent designs on Luger's Television Title!

Lex began playing to the crowd and celebrating, but the Nobility (King Steven Regal, Baron Alexander Wright, Lord Robert Brookside, Duke Douglas Williams, Sir Norman Smiley, and Squire David Taylor--no Earl Robert Eaton, who must be preparing for his main event match) came out to the ring clapping and being generally snotty, putting a damper on Lex retaining his title, but both Sting and Luger departed without incident! Regal proceeded to berate Taylor for losing to commoner Lance Storm on Nitro and says he's negotiated with Commissioner Hennig for a rematch! If Taylor loses again, Regal says he's out of the Nobility!

Lance Storm beat Squire David Taylor again! The commentators, now a little more familiar with Storm, put over his international experience and his training at the Hart Brothers Wrestling Camp! He wraps up Taylor with a rolling single-leg crab, the Canadian Maple Leaf, for the submission victory!

The Nobility beat up Squire David Taylor and kick him out of the Nobility as Lance Storm high-tails it!

Kevin Sullivan defeated Billy Kidman with a double footstomp! Kidman didn't roll over as easily as you would expect of a rookie going up against a veteran on the cusp of a title opportunity, but crashed and burns on a shooting star press, which crushed his momentum!

Billy Kidman put his head in his hands, as if saying "well, what else is new?". Suddenly, the lights of the arena drop. The wing flapping noise happens again, but when it ends the lights do not come back on. A bright light, waaaaaaay brighter than usual, comes from a door in an area near the nosebleed section of the arena. Down towards the ring walks two hooded figures who make their way to the barricade and cross over as the stage lights begin to flicker back on. Billy is ready for another fight, but the two just step into the ring and unhood themselves: the commentators note that this is ECW World Champion Raven and ECW World Tag Team Champion Perry Saturn! Raven gets on the microphone. "Brother Kidman... I have seen you here in the squared circle. You're rusty...not your technique, that's fine. It's your soul which has gears that grind; your heart is dying. I can faintly hear its broken thrumming. I can revive the machine, resuscitate you, show you the way. Quoth the Raven... nevermore." Madusa, Kidman's manager, looks intrigued and excited, but Billy is hesitant and backs away, out of the ring, and slowly up the ramp. Madusa follows him, appearing disappointed. What's going on?

Then the American Males were backstage checking out their new trendy new ring gear and walk-in vests, which were purchased using VK Wallstreet's stolen money, in separate mirrors! Scotty Riggs mentions Wallstreet's ridiculous open call for one of the American Males to join him from Nitro, and blows if off, noting that of course the Males' partnership means more a truckload of money, right? There is a long pause from Bagwell, whose face seems conflicted in the mirror as he checks out his snazzy new vest, before finally concurring somewhat half-heartedly!

There was a Glacier promo! It was OK, but no one cared!

Dusty Rhodes interviewed Earl Robert Eaton! Rhodes asked Eaton how an Alabama boy could be such a turncoat as to forsake his country to side with a bunch of holier-than-thou blue-bloods; Eaton asked Rhodes how he could have become such a washed-up joke! Eaton promised that he'll show in his match with Sting tonight what it looks like to not be washed up, flashed the "V for victory," then bailed. Rhodes looked like he wishes he'd taken a swing at Eaton. Eaton looked terrible!

Chris Benoit beat "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan with the Crippler Crossface!

Ric Flair, sporting a bandage on his head and looking positively incensed, raced out with a steel chair, but Benoit saw it coming and got out of dodge! Flair grabbed a microphone and promised the New Horsemen that he's not through with them! He says that he intends to send Scott Hall and Kevin Nash in particular back up north with their tails between their legs!

The Steiners beat Harlem Heat by DQ when Booker T used a ladder on Scott! Harlem Heat then cut a promo saying they weren't done with the Road Warriors yet!

They ran a video package about Arn Anderson and Randy Savage's matches this past week!

In the main event, Sting defeated Earl Robert Eaton, making him submit to a scorpion deathlock! Sting looked like a man possessed during the match, and even King Steven Regal's attempt to distract him did little to sway the tide in Eaton's favor! Sting and Eaton didn't click at all!

I Liked the show, but Billy Kidman was used too much! For this, I give it a C+!

Thanks for reading! Goodbye!

Q7kid
Jul 24, 2009

NutritiousSnack posted:

Can I still sign up as a booker, this looks fun as hell.

There's always room in the WCW writer's room. Come play with the big boys.

JoeRules
Jul 11, 2001

NutritiousSnack posted:

Can I still sign up as a booker, this looks fun as hell.

You got it. Name your side - WWF has looked like they need a little help, but have also started to get things back on track. I just need an e-mail address from you, which you can PM to me or e-mail to SAJoerules at gmail.

NutritiousSnack
Jul 12, 2011
Yeah, sent you a PM, going to have to go with the WWF. Always been more of a Jericho and Mankind mark.

GenericMartini
Oct 22, 2012

AYYYYY PAPI

RINGSIDEREVIEWS posted:

Hello dear reader welcome to the Ringside Reviews the one stop place for LIVE~! First impression reviews among other things. Today I’ll be running down WWF’s go-home superstars. The ad in the papers said that today’s show will feature THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR~ and I’m a big fan of his work so this will be a fantastic show.

First we got the dark matches, in the first one we had Rick Martel and “The Blue Blood” Hunter Hearst Helmsly, This was surprisingly good opener and in a shocker Martel goes over.

The second match was #1 contenders to the tag belts, The Dudleyz take on the makeshift team of Horowitz and Montoya. When The Dudleyz made their entrance Uncle Zeb also showed up with them, he was fantastic tonight though the match was nothing special.

In the third and final dark match we had Marc Mero take on Taz it didn’t set the world on fire but I can call it wrestling at least.

Now to the Main show which opens with Goldust cutting a promo on Taker "Alas, poor Taker! A fellow of infinite menace, and excellent theatricality. I shall lay him on his back a thousand times, until so purely abhorred in his imagination am I! Where will be his fearful stare? His menacing aura? His moans? They shall be with me, as I shall take his urn, and with it, his soul! AAAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA" he continues cackling as he walks up the ramp. A bit hammy but it does a good job it’s not the best but it was a fun Goldust promo.

WARRIOR~ takes on Can-Am Express member Phil LaFon with Doug Furnas at his side. Match was short and WARRIOR~ was surprisingly off his game. Sometimes the best have off days. But before he can leave Mankind comes out attacks him. They brawl and exit to the back in a great segment, probably because WARRIOR~ is so great.

We are then treated to a short squash between Doink The Clown and Billy Gunn. Match was pretty bad both guys looked mismatched and didn’t click at all. The Dudleyz w/Zeb show up after the match cut a sheathing promo on the fans and The Gunns hyping their match at KOTR. They beat down Billy and tease going for a table, but Bart Gunn runs down and makes the save. Uncle Zeb is really amazing and helped these segments be remotely entertaining.

We got a Rick Martel video package. The crowd seemed to be into him based on the earlier match I can see this guy being a good hand for the WWF again if this continues.

The Video packages didn’t end there as we got a Raw recap of the end of the show with Shawn and Camp Cornette considering it was Shawn Michaels and everything he touches turned the gold the crowd was pumped for Shawn getting his hands on the British B-Dog.

We get a intercontinental title match with Bob Backland and current champ Tom Pritchard, Backlund loses in 8 minutes and he appeared off his game tonight which I think hurt the match but it was still somewhat presentable. The ref gives Pritchard the belt and he celebrates.

After the match Sunny comes out with Chris Candido to cut a promo on Tom Pritchard. Sunny tries to speak but Chris takes the mircophone away from her. "Zip, or Tom, or whatever you want to call yourself, we're through being cousins! You're a stranger to me now. You think because you won the intercontiental title that makes you better than me. Well Tom, I wanna show you how I'm better then you by winning the Intercontinental belt from you at King Of The Ring." Tom Prichard returns from the ramp to reply, Sunny begins to smirk, but Candido ushers her into the corner. Tom begins to speak "Skip, we all know what this is really about." "Don't call me Skip anymore! You don't deserve to call me Skip!" Tom smirks "It doesn't matter what I call you. What matters is that in the last few weeks, you've become a different person. You've realized that Sunny's begun to like me since she knows I'll treat her better, and that's awakened a green eyed monster within you." Chris in anger tries to hit Tom with the microphone but Sunny steps in front of the blow. Candido hits Sunny and Tom runs to her aid. "You made me do this, Prichard! at King of The Ring I want you and that belt... in honor of Sunny." Prichard gets in his face "Chris wake up and take responsiblity for yourself! YOU'RE THE ONE THAT'S HURT SUNNY, NOT JUST PHYSICALLY BUT EMOTIONALLY, AS YOU'VE SUNK INTO JEALOUSY AND BITTERNESS AND TORE OUR FRIENDSHIP APART!" Candido looks mournful and sits and goes to Sunny while Prichard looks on, Candido instead grabs the IC title which Tom had dropped to see if Sunny was ok and bashes Tom with it. Candido poses with the belt then drops it on Prichard. Candido then leaves with Sunny uttering "I'm gonna avenge you Sunny" over and over as he leaves. This was an interesting segment that if it had better performers in it; it might have been very compelling but it kinda fell flat.

Kid takes on Hakushi and Kid wins by DQ when a masked Skunk character appears and attacks him. Post match The masked character gloats and grabs a mic. "Kid, I want you to know that I'm tired of you berating me, thinking you're the breakout star of our team." Kid is confused by the nonsense this mysterious man is jabbering about. "Kid, can't you tell a Rocker when you see one?" The Masked character unveils himself to be MARTY JANNETTY."I wanted you to be my friend, Kid. I wanted us to be partners, EQUALS! But no, you'd always get the victory. I WANTED TO WIN! I was always the guy who'd take the falls, the one you sent out against the monsters." Kid tries running after Jannetty, but Jannetty escapes from the ring to the ramp. "Well look at me now Kid, look at the guy who wanted to be your best friend, and you gave me nothing but disdain and derision. I'm a Kid Rocker no more! Thanks to you, I'm now a Skunkrocker, because you've stunk up my image by association." Kid, fed up, runs after the whiny Skunkrocker, but Jannetty scatters away.

We almost get a Undertaker match, but Goldust attacks him before the match and poises over Taker’s body.

Let me just recap this in full it’s a thing of beauty. WARRIOR~ cuts a promo, Bearer at his side. "MAAAANKIIIIIND, YOUR EYES DO CONTAIN PAIN, THEY DO CONTAIN A TORMENT. THOSE WORDS ARE TRUE. *SKROOOOOOOOOONK* BUT YOU THINK THE WAAAARRRRIIIIOOOOOOOR KNOWS NOT PAIN! YOU THINK HE KNOWS NOT TORMENT? YOU THINK HE KNOWS NOT THE CAPABILITIES OF THE TWISTED AND DEPRAVED? YOU ARE SOOOOOORELY MISTAAAKEEEN, MANKIND! *SKROOOOOOOOONK* THE HEAT OF BATTLE CAN WARP A MAN'S SOUL, TRY HIS SANITY, SEND HIM SPIRALING INTO THE DEPTHS OF MAAAAAAAAAAAAAADNEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSS, AND THE WARRIOR KNOWS THOSE DEPTHS, HE KNOWS THEM WELL! BUT HE HAS RISEN ABOVE THEM, AS HE WILL RISE OVER YOU THIS SUNDAY AT KING OF THE RING! THE SOULS OF WARRIORS WHO HAVE LOST THEIR LIVES ACROSS THE CENTURIES WILL GIVE ME THE FORTITUDE TO DESTROOOOOOY YOOOOOOOOOU! *SKROOOOOOOOONK*" WARRIOR~ and Bearer walk away, as WARRIOR~ yells and pumps his arms.

We get an ARM WRESTLING~ Contest between Yoko and Vader which Vader cheats to win and ends with a huge brawl. This was cool can’t wait for that Hoss off

We have a contract signing segment between Michaels and Bulldog when Cornette tries something fishy Michaels immediately without hesitation superkicks the poo poo out of him which much like a lot of these segments today ends in a brawl.

We get to the main event of Lionheart the team consisting of Roddy Piper and Chris Jericho taking on Owen Hart and Stone Cold Steve Austin w/Cornette and HHH. Both teams go all out and ends when Jericho rolls up Owen when he’s applying a sharpshooter.
Jericho lies exhausted on the mat after getting the win. Owen begins beating him down in anger, but Piper pulls him off. The four men brawl to end Superstars.

Really amazing show to go into King of The Ring. Had lots of great action and WARRIOR~ some parts weren’t the best but nothing was truly bad on the show. Overall a B- and remember to email questions and your wrestling dirt to PenultimateWarrior@hotmail.com I'll be sure and keep your eyes on Ringside Reviews for all your wrestling dirt, LIVE~ recaps, and rumors.

GenericMartini fucked around with this message at 08:45 on Jan 2, 2014

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Skunkrocker
Jan 14, 2012

Your favorite furry wrestler.
What the gently caress?

  • Locked thread