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Ausmund
Jan 24, 2007



For the last 2 years, I've been living in my mom's house and paying $400 in rent every month. I work with a night crew at a local retail store and usually get 40 hours. Since the holidays are over things are slowing down and our trucks are getting smaller so I should consider getting a second job. I have a little over $9,000 in savings and no debt because I dropped out of college due to depression and being a lovely student. Other than work I sit in my room and sleep/watch Netflix/play games/watch youtube and do nothing productive. Lately I haven't felt like doing ANYTHING and just sleep through my days off. I realize I need a change, and while living like this is miserable it is in its self a luxury. I have no life. The small handful of friends I used to have have all moved away and gotten real jobs. I have no social contact. I don't even have a cellphone and smartphones are alien to me. The only positive aspect of living at my mom's house is that its 10 minutes away from my job.

I think I have a lot of mental and emotional problems too that I want to get tested for such as adhd, dyslexia, depression, suicidal ideation, poor social skills, inability to make friends, severe anxiety, and avoiding everything unless I absolutely must deal with it. I was running 2-3 miles every other day, hoping it would make me feel better, but stopped when it started getting really cold.

I have the number of a therapist that specializes in learning disorders and everything else I have issues with but haven't gotten around to calling her yet. I'm wondering, should I focus on moving out and getting my own place first or should I focus on therapy and worry about moving out later. I feel embarrassed that I'm nearly 26 years old and not used to being on my own at all. I had my own studio apartment two years ago but I took very poor care of it, didn't have any utilities(water and power were included), the place was always a mess(yes even trash and at times left over food sitting around),a broken bathroom sink that I never used and avoided, and I never payed my bills on time even though I had the money. I'm afraid if I move out again it will be the same thing all over again and I won't know what to do and what if an emergency happens then I really won't know what to do and I'll be homeless or kill myself.

I feel like I'm not a normal human being, like I don't belong, I'm not compatible with the world around me, I don't function correctly. I don't know what to do except pursue therapy, but even then how do I explain myself? What if they tell me its all in my head or just low self esteem? Like I don't have any real problems at all?

So how bad is it that I'm this old and still live with my mom? We don't get along that great, but I'm polite and courteous and keep my distance, my rent is helping her pay for my sister's apartment and school expenses and I do basic chores, mow the lawn, fix stuff, take care of her dog when shes out of town. I'm also saving money because I'm so close to my work so I figure I can't be that bad off. Should I be paying her more?

tldr; Why am I such a complacent loser and what are the best steps for me to take to get over it? Sorry if my posting is really jumbled and all over the place.

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Carl Seitan
May 20, 2004



Ausmund posted:

tldr; Why am I such a complacent loser and what are the best steps for me to take to get over it?

You're depressed. Call the therapist.

Ausmund
Jan 24, 2007



What about moving out? Should I do that asap or would it just be a disaster and I should just hold off for now?

Carl Seitan
May 20, 2004



Get treatment/help, then move out when you're doing better.

Devils Affricate
Jan 22, 2010


Don't move out if you can't take care of your own place. Contact that therapist and tell her what you told us.

zmcnulty
Jul 26, 2003



Why do you think you need to move out now? Will it somehow force you to mature and grow?
I think that boat set sail a long time ago; most people do that when they leave for college and/or turn 18.

How would this time be any different than two years ago? How have you changed in the past 2 years, besides becoming more desperate? You're almost 26. Get help.

I'm guessing most therapists wouldn't say you have no problems (even if you don't), given they get paid by people with problems.

Ausmund
Jan 24, 2007



zmcnulty posted:

Why do you think you need to move out now? Will it somehow force you to mature and grow?
I think that boat set sail a long time ago; most people do that when they leave for college and/or turn 18.

How would this time be any different than two years ago? How have you changed in the past 2 years, besides becoming more desperate? You're almost 26. Get help.

I'm guessing most therapists wouldn't say you have no problems (even if you don't), given they get paid by people with problems.
Because it's embarrassing and I'm ashamed of myself. On MLK weekend I'm going down to the city to visit my friend who I haven't seen in a while, what the hell am I supposed to tell him I've been up to? Just lie? Or underplay my situation? Seems to be the only thing I can do.

I'll call the therapist in the morning.

Also I have tons of vacation hours I need to use up, what should I do with them? I'm think since things are slowing down and I'm getting less hours I'll use them to fill them in.

quote:

I think that boat set sail a long time ago; most people do that when they leave for college and/or turn 18.
I hosed up. I should have never went to community college and commuted from home. I should of moved out like everyone else and just worked two or three jobs instead. I thought it would have been smarter to stay at home and save money. It wasn't worth it.

Ausmund fucked around with this message at Jan 9, 2014 around 08:46

Sharkie
Feb 4, 2013


If you move out again without addressing your core issues there's a good chance the same thing will happen again. Look, living with your mom sucks, but at least you have a roof over your head while you have the opportunity to get therapy. Not trying to tell you you're wrong to dislike it, just that it might help to view this as an opportunity to work on yourself.

Go to a therapist and you know what? Maybe printing out your post and showing it to them may not be a bad idea. I'm not a mental health person, but I'd agree with the other people who said this does sound like depression.

edit: Glad you're calling the therapist, good first step! Take it one step at a time, and don't worry about trying to fix all of your problems at once. You have to take care of yourself, your mindset, first, before you do anything else.

Sharkie fucked around with this message at Jan 9, 2014 around 08:48

BlueChocolate
Jan 4, 2014


Well you have savings and you pay rent so you at least have that going for you. You're not a total dead beat.

If you want to make friends, then get yourself into shape, buy a couple of new outfits and get a good haircut. If you don't know what looks good, google it. Then join some social activities/clubs/meeetups and you should be able to make friends with your new hip self. (Just don't start scratching your balls or talking about your cum collection until you're best friends.)

kizudarake
Apr 11, 2007


Take pictures of your living space and post them here. Don't clean or straighten anything up first. We can give you better advice after that.

Zack_Gochuck
Jan 3, 2007

Stupid Wrestling People

Ausmund posted:

I never payed my bills on time even though I had the money.

This is such an easy thing to do. I think your problems run a lot deeper than living with your mom. You are probably depressed.

Tommofork
Dec 25, 2007

This is where I begin to speculate what being a
man of my word costs me


Ausmund posted:

I feel like I'm not a normal human being, like I don't belong, I'm not compatible with the world around me, I don't function correctly. I don't know what to do except pursue therapy, but even then how do I explain myself? What if they tell me its all in my head or just low self esteem? Like I don't have any real problems at all?

Seconding contact a therapist and tell them what you said here. These issues are not in your head or the result of you being weak or broken. You have an illness or illnesses that are severely messing with you. I would bet money on it being social anxiety that leads you into depression.

If life was a marathon, you've been unknowingly running it with a broken leg. It isn't your fault that your leg is broken, it just is. It could've been that way since you were born/from a very young age and you just never realised anything there was wrong because that's how it's always been for you. Then naturally you look at the other people running without issues passing you by and start to think you're just a poo poo runner.

I was 27 before I got my illnesses diagnosed and holy poo poo I could not believe that people do not have to put up with the same poo poo I did from anxiety. I still can't to be honest. Before that I just thought I was a completely poo poo failure of a human being and utterly worthless with no redeeming features.

P.S. I have social anxiety and occasional depressive episodes and I can relate to everything you've said, which is why I'd bet money on it.

Ausmund posted:

Because it's embarrassing and I'm ashamed of myself. On MLK weekend I'm going down to the city to visit my friend who I haven't seen in a while, what the hell am I supposed to tell him I've been up to? Just lie? Or underplay my situation? Seems to be the only thing I can do.

I'll call the therapist in the morning.

Also I have tons of vacation hours I need to use up, what should I do with them? I'm think since things are slowing down and I'm getting less hours I'll use them to fill them in.

I hosed up. I should have never went to community college and commuted from home. I should of moved out like everyone else and just worked two or three jobs instead. I thought it would have been smarter to stay at home and save money. It wasn't worth it.

Underplay it. You can get away with a surprising amount if you just say, "Yeah, not much, just been working and playing games etc lately. How about you?" Ask questions about what they're up to and just shoot the poo poo. You don't have to give a detailed account of your time. Talk about things you like, from movies, tv shows, games, funny events from work, weird things you've seen around town, anything.

If they're a good friend you might even consider confiding in them. Talking about this kind of stuff can be massively, massively confronting but it gets massively easier to deal with if you speak about.

e: a good rule of thumb is considering your friend was telling you that this was happening to them, how would you relate to them? Would it change your opinion of them? Would you be sympathetic? Would you think they're weak? Would you think something is wrong and they could use a hand?

Tommofork fucked around with this message at Jan 9, 2014 around 12:46

LLJKSiLk
Jul 7, 2005

We don't need a crystal ball to see the future. Roll Tide.

I've got a home, career, etc. and wish I could live with my mom for $400/mo. Better than bills, etc.

Get therapy - don't move.

Unicorncupcake
Sep 13, 2011


Have you considered talking to your mom/your parents about this? Maybe it's time to lay all your cards on the table about exactly how hopeless you feel, and they can help you figure out what some steps you could take, or even help you book an appointment with a shrink/take you to it if you're worried that you won't follow through with it. There's no reason for you to be handling this alone if your family can be your support network. That's what they're there for.

Ausmund
Jan 24, 2007



BlueChocolate posted:

If you want to make friends, then get yourself into shape, buy a couple of new outfits and get a good haircut. If you don't know what looks good, google it. Then join some social activities/clubs/meeetups and you should be able to make friends with your new hip self. (Just don't start scratching your balls or talking about your cum collection until you're best friends.)
I've been told I'm pretty good looking by other people, even being accused of being gay a couple of times because, "I never see you with a girl". I keep in decent shape. I'm 5'8 165 lbs, I can do 25 pull ups and 30 chinups and I can run 3 miles without stopping, albeit slowly. I do a lot of truck unloading poo poo at my job so I get some physical activity there as well.

kizudarake posted:

Take pictures of your living space and post them here. Don't clean or straighten anything up first. We can give you better advice after that.
The closest thing I have to a camera is my 3DS, but it won't let me upload pictures(as far as I know). Sorry.

Tommofork posted:

If they're a good friend you might even consider confiding in them. Talking about this kind of stuff can be massively, massively confronting but it gets massively easier to deal with if you speak about.

e: a good rule of thumb is considering your friend was telling you that this was happening to them, how would you relate to them? Would it change your opinion of them? Would you be sympathetic? Would you think they're weak? Would you think something is wrong and they could use a hand?
If it were me, I'd be all ears. But other people don't really seem to be like that, so I'd have to phrase my issues with as much digression as possible. Something like, "Yeah, I've been alright, not in a great mood lately, needed to get out, glad I could finally come down here though!."

Glad you found peace though.


LLJKSiLk posted:

I've got a home, career, etc. and wish I could live with my mom for $400/mo. Better than bills, etc.
What makes you say this?

Unicorncupcake posted:

Have you considered talking to your mom/your parents about this? Maybe it's time to lay all your cards on the table about exactly how hopeless you feel, and they can help you figure out what some steps you could take, or even help you book an appointment with a shrink/take you to it if you're worried that you won't follow through with it. There's no reason for you to be handling this alone if your family can be your support network. That's what they're there for.
My mom and sister think I'm a loser and I need to get over myself. They've told me things like, "Just do it, its not hard!" or "You're on the wrong track because you hide from everything, I wish you'd see the light!" or how if I don't go back to school I'll be an arthritic old man at 30. My dad is deceased.

Rhymenoserous
May 23, 2008

I got tired of seeing Louis' text here, so instead you get this duck. I put some of it in gold and this part would love some crackers.

~SMcD

Ausmund posted:

I've been told I'm pretty good looking by other people, even being accused of being gay a couple of times because, "I never see you with a girl". I keep in decent shape. I'm 5'8 165 lbs, I can do 25 pull ups and 30 chinups and I can run 3 miles without stopping, albeit slowly. I do a lot of truck unloading poo poo at my job so I get some physical activity there as well.

The closest thing I have to a camera is my 3DS, but it won't let me upload pictures(as far as I know). Sorry.

If it were me, I'd be all ears. But other people don't really seem to be like that, so I'd have to phrase my issues with as much digression as possible. Something like, "Yeah, I've been alright, not in a great mood lately, needed to get out, glad I could finally come down here though!."

Glad you found peace though.

What makes you say this?

My mom and sister think I'm a loser and I need to get over myself. They've told me things like, "Just do it, its not hard!" or "You're on the wrong track because you hide from everything, I wish you'd see the light!" or how if I don't go back to school I'll be an arthritic old man at 30. My dad is deceased.

You sound like a real hoot.

Iron Crowned
May 6, 2003

Stained sweatpants. Bad facial hair. Shrill voice. Spergin rules knowledge. Casino dice. CHECK. Games Day, here I come!


Ausmund posted:

The closest thing I have to a camera is my 3DS, but it won't let me upload pictures(as far as I know). Sorry.

3DS comes with a 2GB SD card. Most modern computers have a SD slot.

docbeard
Jul 18, 2011

He covets the precious things of the shop.

Yeah, I'm definitely going to add another tally to the "talk to your therapist before you make any big life changes" column. Losing interest in pretty much everything you used to enjoy is a big sign that something's wrong.

Laterbase
May 18, 2011


You don't sound like you've hosed up massively or made any huge mistakes. Like everyone else is saying maybe talk to a professional to help you move forward.

Liquid Communism
Mar 9, 2004

Congratulations on not getting fit in 2011!

Nthing the thread. Your 'fuckups' sound like pretty run of the mill young people stuff, but the way you see them sounds way out of proportion with how bad they really are. I'd suggest finding a professional to talk to.

A therapist is never going to put down your problems as unimportant, because you wouldn't be talking with them if they weren't important to you. What they will do is help you find ways to cope with waht's going on in your head, in order to make these things stop making your life harder.

Good luck, man.

LLJKSiLk
Jul 7, 2005

We don't need a crystal ball to see the future. Roll Tide.

Ausmund posted:

What makes you say this?

Because I would be in a stronger situation financially and deal with much less stress?

Seriously, you've got a job, are living with your mom who presumably isn't doing anything unreasonable for cheap. Sweet situation, and as long as you aren't getting on each other's nerves, I think it is great.

Now imagine doubling/tripling your cost of living, and also having to deal with lawn care, and other bullshit if you live in another place. My hot water heater goes out? $$$, water leak? $$$, etc.

Peroxide Cowboy
Nov 30, 2013



OP - It sounds like you need a purpose. A man without a purpose will walk in dark places. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=45kNqUF6kC4

Spaceman Future!
Feb 9, 2007

slurp


Having a place of your own will give you a base of operations to have loud wall banging sex with beautiful women. That's what got me out the door at 18 at least, worth it.

martyrdumb
Nov 24, 2009

pants are overrated


Do you have health insurance? This is pretty textbook depression, made worse because there is very little worth being excited about in your life. I lived like this for 5+ years, it sucks rear end. Get therapy if you can. Then when your mind is out of the poo poo toilet, start doing things worth being excited about. You don't have to have a girlfriend to be happy, but there must be something you can do around there. Meetups or pen and paper gaming, whatever.

Ausmund posted:

My mom and sister think I'm a loser and I need to get over myself. They've told me things like, "Just do it, its not hard!" or "You're on the wrong track because you hide from everything, I wish you'd see the light!" or how if I don't go back to school I'll be an arthritic old man at 30. My dad is deceased.
I think you'd benefit from moving away, if only to get away from this attitude. You're an adult, you get to pick how you live your life. If that means eating cereal for dinner and playing video games for the next 50 years, who gives a gently caress? You're employed, you have savings, get the gently caress out already.

martyrdumb fucked around with this message at Jan 10, 2014 around 14:27

Fat Marilyn Monroe
Sep 11, 2011



Move out of moms house and into a submarine.

Sapphaholic
Mar 21, 2008

Delicious.

Ausmund posted:

My mom and sister think I'm a loser and I need to get over myself. They've told me things like, "Just do it, its not hard!"

You sister says this and yet you mentioned that the rent you pay your mom (for living at home) is what your mom uses to pay for your sister's apartment?

Ausmund
Jan 24, 2007



Sapphaholic posted:

You sister says this and yet you mentioned that the rent you pay your mom (for living at home) is what your mom uses to pay for your sister's apartment?
It goes towards it, yeah. They don't rely on me for it though, my mom has just told me that it helps. My mom lives off my dad's life insurance and doesn't work so shes not that bad off.

Left a message for the therapist I want counseling from. To be honestly I was really really really reluctant to do so, but I did it none the less. Awaiting a call back.

martyrdumb posted:

Do you have health insurance?
I'm enrolled in a basic health plan at my retail department store job. I don't know anything about it and I've never used it. I haven't been to the doctor or dentist in years(I keep my teeth clean though).

Iron Crowned posted:

3DS comes with a 2GB SD card. Most modern computers have a SD slot.
I'm using an old desktop computer, as far as I know it doesn't have an SD slot. I tried using the SD card in my PSP in something else once but it ended up getting wiped so I don't trust taking it out of the 3ds.

Ausmund fucked around with this message at Jan 10, 2014 around 19:45

Xenocides
Jan 14, 2008

They weren't just hull numbers, they were our home addresses. Now the old neighborhood is torn down and gone and all that is left are memories.


If Benny ever gets a job you can be his roommate.

Lief
Nov 23, 2004



Throw away all your time wasters (video games, netflix, these forums) and work toward whatever life you want. Whatever it is make sure you spend most of your free-time working toward that goal. Don't get caught up trying to fix each lovely aspect of your life: you'll burn yourself out. Pick a goal and obsess over it until it's done.

Internet Explorer
Jun 1, 2005

OFFICIAL BITCH OF DANBO DAXTER

Exercise, eat better, and sleep with a normal schedule. Try that for 3 months and see where you're at.

m1chelin man
Jan 6, 2014

by angerbeet


not the best advice giver. I live at home at 25. I have the gumption to post minor discomfort with the token "see a therapist" particularly because I feel I have a modicum of respect for myself now and i'm getting my poo poo together somewhat.

so what I wanted to say is that some time time can take care of some of the details. if you like your job that's a bonus. I had a good job with the postal service but getting out of that situation was the springboard toward something that could be a career for myself if I play my cards right.

you not having a dad around probably doesn't help, but I think you will find something you will want to make a career if you give it time and are proactive.

I got jesus for the rough times. don't know what mark kozelek was thinking with the overdubbing on this track i'm listening to.

anyway, maybe therapy is a way forward. I personally don't ascribe to the theory that somebody with a degree can no jack poo poo about what i'm going through. it's important to have someone to confide to as a close friend. I have a close friend who is definitely an ear and someone who can steer me like a mother sometimes.

I had to do phone work counseling at my old job and the guy on the other end of the line was a nice chap with a bach from Columbia, but I don't think he did anything for me.

then again it wasn't work that was the problem, it was my.. forget it.

took me a long time to get out of the revulsion of living in my childhood home

clammy
Nov 25, 2004




At least you have a mom who loves you and wants to help you in life. Why don't you try honoring her by using the huge advantage she's giving you as a means to better yourself? Go get therapy while you are only paying $400 rent every month, get yourself better, and then move out when you're ready. Stop feeling ashamed for being sick and take the steps you need to take. I promise if you do this you will look back and be proud of yourself for getting your poo poo together. Also you have plenty to be proud of already; $9000 in savings is pretty good, and holding down a steady job. Living with your moms doesn't make you some kind of leper you know. Anyway, I hope you get better. Good luck.

reignonyourparade
Nov 15, 2012


Obviously I can't speak definitely whether your mom and sister's attitude about you still living at home is actually harmful, but it sounds like you don't actually entirely disagree with you about it, so maybe if you express agreement and say that you simply want to get to a place where you DO feel ready to move out, they'll be less belligerent about it. Especially that 'wrong track' comment if you agreed with that and said you wanted to get on the right track, that might help.

Wet Biscuit McGlee
Jul 13, 2006

girls hate me


OP I'm in the same situation as you. Same lovely job, same lovely living situation, all alone, all the same, One difference. If my parents were charging $400 a month to stay with them, I'd see no reason to stay with them. There's pretty much now reason to stay with them with them charging you rent like they are. Find some roomates or a cheap apartment and rough it out. Some time apart from them nagging you will give you the distance you need to figure yourself out a little.

Your job is decent enough and they like you enough to give you some time to figure things out. Get some therapy, food stamps, and rough it for a year or so. That's what I'm probably going to do.

Ausmund
Jan 24, 2007



clammy posted:

At least you have a mom who loves you and wants to help you in life. Why don't you try honoring her by using the huge advantage she's giving you as a means to better yourself? Go get therapy while you are only paying $400 rent every month, get yourself better, and then move out when you're ready. Stop feeling ashamed for being sick and take the steps you need to take. I promise if you do this you will look back and be proud of yourself for getting your poo poo together. Also you have plenty to be proud of already; $9000 in savings is pretty good, and holding down a steady job. Living with your moms doesn't make you some kind of leper you know. Anyway, I hope you get better. Good luck.
Oh, I didn't mean to seem ungrateful. I am very thankful to be able to live here and have a roof over my head. I've gotten much better at developing good cleaning habits too, unlike my time in my studio apartment.

reignonyourparade posted:

Obviously I can't speak definitely whether your mom and sister's attitude about you still living at home is actually harmful, but it sounds like you don't actually entirely disagree with you about it, so maybe if you express agreement and say that you simply want to get to a place where you DO feel ready to move out, they'll be less belligerent about it. Especially that 'wrong track' comment if you agreed with that and said you wanted to get on the right track, that might help.
I don't really trust them, but as long as I'm polite, respectful, courteous, and keep my distance it's fine. It's like dealing with a boss at your job that you don't like but you have to get along with them. It's not a big deal.

FluffieDuckie
May 11, 2005
quack


Ausmund posted:


I'm using an old desktop computer, as far as I know it doesn't have an SD slot. I tried using the SD card in my PSP in something else once but it ended up getting wiped so I don't trust taking it out of the 3ds.

I'm going to say you need to work with a counselor about this learned helplessness thing before you can move out on your own. If you approach your life like you approach the problem of "how to take pictures and put them on the internet" you're not going to make it on your own very long. Really. My 73 year old mother can take a picture and put it on the internet, and she can't drive a car anymore.

The first step is to tell yourself "I'm going to do this thing - not make excuses why I can't do this thing."

Ausmund
Jan 24, 2007



Got an appointment set up for Wendnesday. They don't take insurance, but its just a $75 consultation. I'll go to the appointment but I may pursue a different therapist that matches my financial needs. What's the best way for me to go about it and what should I be looking for regarding fiances and insurance? I know nothing about insurance other than I'm enrolled in a standard plan at my job and I have a card.

BIG CITY LAWYER
Sep 15, 2004
This is not my beautiful wife!

Please forgive me if any of this seems condescending, I don't mean for it to be!

Look at the name of your provider on the card. Mine, for example is Blue Cross/Blue Shield. It will also probably say somewhere on the card whether it is an HMO or PPO. Now, since I live in Texas if I wanted to visit my healthcare providers website and didn't have the address (it might be on the back of your card, so check!) I would google "Blue Cross Blue Shield Texas". Now, once you're on the website there should be some sort of members login somewhere on the page. Since you probably don't have an account you're going to have to set one up. With your card in hand you should have all the information you need to do that. If you run into any roadblocks setting up an account, call the provided help line.

Now. Once you have an account set up here you will be able to do all sorts of things. Generally, there's a space for you to "find a doctor" and here you'll be able to select a type of doctor/service and input your zip code and it will give you a list of folks that are either In Network or Out of Network. Look for In Network unless you truly have no other options. What the means is that they have a sweet hookup with your insurance company and you will have to pay less out of pocket. (I'm super simplifying, but you get the idea.) Once you find someone, you can also call them to confirm they accept your specific insurance.

Now. How much will this all cost you? There are two ways for you to find out. I assume your company as a company intranet? An internal, employee only website that you can access either from work or at home? If so, you can typically find healthcare benefits packets there. If not, you can either speak to HR, ask a supervisor, or call the employee helpline I'm fairly certain that you will have. What you want is a healthcare benefits package. Or, additionally, you can ask for a price sheet that will just give you the basic breakdown of what you can expect to pay. If you just tell them you'd like to see a breakdown of what your health benefits cover they should be able to provide that for you.

If your insurance doesn't cover mental health visits, well that's a whole nother post.

Ausmund
Jan 24, 2007



Any advice fore "experiencing life" once I get better? I've done nothing and feel like I have as much experience with the world as a child. Since highschool its been literally a big nothing of sleeping, going to work, coming home and more sleeping.

BIG CITY LAWYER posted:

Please forgive me if any of this seems condescending, I don't mean for it to be!
Not at all! I really really appreciate the advice and still would appreciate even if it were condescending.

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CzarChasm
Mar 14, 2009

Why is it every time I need to get somewhere, we get waylaid by jackassery?


Ausmund posted:

Any advice fore "experiencing life" once I get better? I've done nothing and feel like I have as much experience with the world as a child. Since highschool its been literally a big nothing of sleeping, going to work, coming home and more sleeping.

What do you want to experience? If you had all the money in the world, what would you want to do?

Do you want to see the world, or even just one other country? Would you want to go on one of those low Earth orbit space flights? Do you have any interest in learning how to play guitar or piano or accordion? Do you have a favorite band that is playing anywhere within 100 miles of your home? Do you like to eat exotic foods? Go to a theme park if you've never done that. Ride some roller coasters and eat terrible fried food.

You don't have to detail where you live, but there are weird fun things to do all over if you google a little bit. You can drive a tank for a couple hundred bucks in Montana (I think). Georgia has a diamond mine open to the public where you can keep anything you dig up. If you're into NASCAR there's probably 100 different places that will let you get into a car and go racing around the track at high speed. Skydiving is available all over the country.

These things will cost money, but it sounds like you only have a few expenses at this time and should be able to save up some cash to do something you want.

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