Blood in the Bosphorus: A Byzantium Paradox Mega-Campaign

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Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

D because pagan Rome is the best Rome, Hellenic Glory for the warriors of Byzantium!

# ¿ Jan 24, 2014 06:37

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# ¿ Apr 29, 2024 00:12

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

New Byzantines

A We must bide our time, let the Turks have their land while we take back our land from the Bulgarians, then we shall come down upon them like a storm!!

# ¿ Feb 17, 2014 15:09

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

What we need is a party that see to that what is most important to the empire, gold and expansion, both is what we have here in the Black Sea, we need to bring Roman Civilization to the nomads to the north and push all merchant republics that are not our own out of Roman land then replace them with our own. This party is a alliance of the interests of both the Steppe people and the Merchant Republics. Rome may be destined to rule the world, but gold is destined to rule Rome.

Vote for Steppes and Republics

(Thanks to Talky for the icon.)

Blackunknown fucked around with this message at 22:58 on Feb 23, 2014

# ¿ Feb 23, 2014 21:07

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Rejected Fate posted:

While your stance on the Steppe beyond the Crimea is an... odd one, your stance on merchant republics and money is that of the Fraternalists!

Join us, brother! It is a pity we are outnumbered even by the heretics at the moment.

I must politely decline our party seeks to be independent and retain it's interest zone in the Steppes, however we would gladly support any propositions regarding Merchant Republic interests.

[Thanks to Talky for the icon]

Blackunknown fucked around with this message at 22:58 on Feb 23, 2014

# ¿ Feb 23, 2014 21:36

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Talky posted:

Here you go!

I figured Purple Cross for Rome (unless you want to jump on the wacky religion bandwagon too?), gold octagon (coin) for merchant republics, and the black horse for the Black Sea and the steppe.

I like political iconography!

You sir, are the best kind of person. The Steppes and Republics party thanks you for your assistance.

Blackunknown fucked around with this message at 22:59 on Feb 23, 2014

# ¿ Feb 23, 2014 22:56

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Steppes and Republics

I would like to propose suggestions for some courses of action for which our nation would benefit from.

1. Conquering the coastline of the Black Sea as to completely control trade there.

2. Conquer Cilicia to create a Merchant Republic to profit from trade in the Holy Land.

3. Embargo the Venetians then tear down their trade posts and confiscate the assets within.

# ¿ Feb 24, 2014 04:49

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Flesnolk posted:

Why would we destroy Venice's trade? Can't you see that if we incorporate them into the Empire but leave their influence as it is, it will astronomically increase our wealth and power over the Mediterranean?

Steppes and Republics

I am not opposed to annexing Venice, however I feel it is currently too far away to properly defend. Embargoing them is a more short-term plan to obtain money. Annexing Venice is probably a better idea when we have conquered a few more counties in the Adrianic.

Blackunknown fucked around with this message at 14:59 on Feb 24, 2014

# ¿ Feb 24, 2014 05:53

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Jimmy4400nav posted:

Friend, again you ideas and focuses fall pretty much directly in line with the Fraternalist ideals and our ABC proposal, perhaps we can work together to accomplish much.

Steppes and Republics

Our party would gladly join a coalition of other parties that expresses interests in expansion and mercantilism such as yours as long as our party would keep it's individual interests.

# ¿ Feb 24, 2014 15:08

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Jimmy4400nav posted:

Sure, I mean the focus on the steppes is a tad. . .different, but considering we both want to see more mercantalistic republics in the Empire, I can see us working in coalition with each other to promote interests. I take it you're interested in the ABC proposal?

Steppes and Republics

Yes, your ABC Proposal holds much in common with our own proposal, especially conquering the gold mines of the Hashimid and complete trade hegemoney of the Black Sea.

# ¿ Feb 24, 2014 15:26

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Lord Cyrahzax posted:

If we are so Greek, why do we continue to allow Pecheneg invaders and Crimeans to dominate trade? Why do we allow local, defeated, ex-infidel aristocrats to rule over vast provinces? Greeks were famous for another thing, Senator: colonization. Our ancestors spread across the Mediterranean, founding new, Greek, cities, and would change the very character of the surrounding lesser peoples. As I have said, our own imperial predecessors did the same in Gaul and Hispania.

I therefore call for the appointment of Greeks alone to themes, for the destruction of the traitorous Pecheneg "despotate," and for the reorganization of the merchant republics under Greek patricians! We must remake conquered peoples in the image of Constantinople to ever be truly united!

Steppes and Republics

Good sir I must protest this course of action, we Pecheneg, Cuman, and Crimean Nobles and Merchenys are as loyal to the Roman crown as any Citizen of the Empire. We certainly do not revolt any more then the Greek themes, and we certainly do not send any less trade revenue to the Crown for Imperial use.

Blackunknown fucked around with this message at 20:29 on Feb 24, 2014

# ¿ Feb 24, 2014 17:53

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Lord Cyrahzax posted:

You are right on trade revenue. The Komnenoi have given you steppe invaders a monopoly over the Empire, over Greeks! They have allowed you a vassal king, as if you were more worthy than the formerly Roman and Orthodox Vlachs you continue to oppress! Already these mistakes have cost Roman lives, Roman money, and Roman honor! Rebellions will continue to bankrolled by you foreigners until you are free of the Empire, which is why the entire area must be Romanized.

You can have your steppes, but learn Greek. Participate in millennia of glory! Become our true brothers. Forget your pagan ways, forever.

Steppes and Republics
I take no issue with learning the Greek language and most of the Roman controlled Steppes have converted to Orthodoxy, but I refuse to forgo our culture. It is us Civilized warriors of the Steppes that can keep the northern pagans out of the Empire's land. Further more we most certainly do not "bankroll rebellions" as you have put it. In fact I would like to propose that Horse Archers be put into any standing army created as to assist in putting down rebellions so as to strike fear into the hearts of any who would dare think of rebelling against our glorious empire.

Blackunknown fucked around with this message at 23:16 on Feb 24, 2014

# ¿ Feb 24, 2014 20:05

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Steppes and Republics

JT Jag posted:

Georgia will be difficult to add to the Empire. They are an Orthodox kingdom, one of the few left besides ourselves, and too proud to accept vassalization in any circumstance.

Georgia doesn't exist anymore it was conquered by the Hashimids

HenessyHero posted:

I propose Nova Mediterranean.

We should continue our expansion around the black sea until it is fully claimed. By acquiring these lands and those nearby, we will ₁ see the most benefit from the trade republic we've established in Crimea, ₂ the ports here will contribute their ships to boolster our maritime themes. ₃ The coastal nature of the levies these lands will provide us will stock us with highly mobile troops (through the ships), enabling us to muster, move and form the entire grand army before the ink can dry on the declaration of war. ₄ Some of these lands are occupied by wicked heathens and pagans, God wills us to seize these lands for the moral benefit of its peoples.

This is a most excellent course of action, especially if we take control of the Azov estuary which will be a massive boon to trade power within the Black Sea.

# ¿ Feb 25, 2014 00:07

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Steppes and Republics

Perhaps we should conquer less aggressive lands in Asia. Many merchants coming from Asia seem to hail from the mythical land of Hindustan, perhaps we should set up some colonies and trade posts there. I mean how bad can it be if so many merchants live there?

# ¿ Feb 25, 2014 04:11

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Steppes and Republics

Be cautious of the Venetians, while their holdings are few, they contain enough in their coffers to hire many mercenaries to fight against us. Enough to, theoretically, sponsor a crusade against us. I'm not saying we wouldn't be successful, i'm saying we should be careful not to lose any more men then we have to.

# ¿ Feb 26, 2014 03:49

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Clayren posted:

A CRUSADE? That's preposterous, why would you declare a crusade on a Christian state? A crusade, my word, what silliness these senators come up with!

Steppes and Republics

I said only theoretically, I mean they would have enough funds to do it, it would just never happen. The pope would never attack the mighty Empire, I mean who does he think is keeping the Seljuks at from overrunning Europa.

Blackunknown fucked around with this message at 05:01 on Feb 26, 2014

# ¿ Feb 26, 2014 04:26

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

The Sandman posted:

Ah, but there's the thing: what of your loyalties should, God forbid, our line of Komnenid rulers come to an end, whether by treason most foul or a lack of heirs? Or if one of the other Komnenids should take up arms against our Basilissa?

No, loyalty to the throne itself is the best course. For should the throne cease to be, we would all presumably have far greater concerns than who on Earth to pledge allegiance to in the face of the end of days.

As for drinks... I happen to have several casks of spirits distilled from Cypriot molasses, cut with lime juice and a hint of ginger. I suppose I could arrange to bring one to the next gala.

Steppes and Republics

If drinks are being brought to the senate meetings from now on my party would gladly supply some. I recommend a drink that our traders brought back with them from the Steppes of the Far East called "Kumis". I know not what it is made from but I assure you my fellow Senator that it does not want for taste.

# ¿ Feb 26, 2014 22:06

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Deceitful Penguin posted:

Look, itsa all very smple right? You all, you all senators, you always talking. Well, I say talking never done did saoolve nothing! No, it was action, it was when we, as romans, did huge action against the, the lesser people, that great things happened. Crossing the river with the dice, the, the guy witht elephants, we beat him, the moving of the capital, the victory, with the, the thing, you know. Action!

And the Komnenians, they are like, the Caesars reborn, only even better! They are the greatest, guys, gals, whatever. And seeing as they are in charge, we, well, little indulgesneses like drink (haha, whats one more sip?) or women or wahtever, what are they? Of course we deserve that! It doesn't matter you know.

So really, it's all very simple, just trust in the Empire and it trusts into you. You see who you can't trust, right away. Like the goddamn douxes, always plotting like some drat, plot-people. They won't share a drink, no! In case it poisons. So you find what you can trust in a world that is lacking in such things, and you stick to them. Stick, like, glue or another thing that sticks.

That is hte Komenninas. That and drinking a lot of alchohol, becuase hell, from the bottom of the glass it almost makes sense.

In vino veritas, they say. And that's how we see the truth.

(The senator then gently waddles off, obviously well in his cups)

Steppes and Republics

I leave the senate for two hours and now half the senators are drunk, and i'm pretty sure the one in the corner there is dead, what happened when I was gone? Are the Seljulks invading? Are did the Empress get assassinated? Are the Bulgarians rebelling again? It's the Croatians isn't it?

# ¿ Feb 28, 2014 02:24

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Steppes and Republics

..... Well this isn't as bad as that time that crazy Vlach noble impaled all those people and drank their blood. And on the bright side we're not under attack by Croatian-Bulgarian Seljuk assassins...... I think.

# ¿ Feb 28, 2014 02:55

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

D3m3 posted:

...I can only hope that the inevitable influx of dogs or other household animals in official-looking clothing tomorrow morning will be well-behaved, and receptive to belly rubs as political leverage.

(OOC: Speaking of which, could anyone who knows something about the Byzantine Empire help me find a decent sense of what a senator or official might wear? I'd like to maybe do a drawing of Acting Senator Scruffles.)

Steppes and Republics

Perhaps it is not a good idea to call our fellow senators dog, I mean they could be Seljuks, or Bulgarians, or both.

[OOC here is a picture of a Byzantine Senate for your reference.)

# ¿ Feb 28, 2014 04:39

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

TheFlyingLlama posted:

Traitors? We are but the truest patriots in all of the senate! We simply want to bring this empire to greatness, but how can greatness be achieved when we do not follow the words of Allah? We simply want to bring the Truth of the Prophet (peace be upon him) to this great nation.

Steppes and Republics

In all fairness they are actually some of the few who are never here drunk.

# ¿ Feb 28, 2014 04:42

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

TheMcD posted:

Well, if you consider Cicero to be a Byzantine...

Sorry if its not actually a Byzantine senate, it just appeared in a Google image search for "Byzantine Senate". Also said search contains images from this LP so.... hurah?

# ¿ Feb 28, 2014 04:46

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Steppes and Republics

....Wow the senate is pretty empty, and here I thought that the senators here argued for most of the day before they left and the night senators argued in their place while the day senators were gone.

# ¿ Mar 1, 2014 03:36

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

TheMcD posted:

The senate is still full of senators. However, if those senators are in fact conscious is a different story, and the stench of alcohol and somebody's lunch is keeping the conscious senators out. The slaves had no opportunity to clean up as apparently orders came from the Kommenians to "not interrupt our important emergency senate meeting, regardless of the situation".

Steppes and Republics

...... We're in an emergency senate meeting? For what? I thought this was the senate's usual daily meeting.

# ¿ Mar 1, 2014 03:45

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

TheMcD posted:

No, the emergency meeting was in the night. Apparently it involved some sort of scandal regarding the wineries of the empire, as I saw a bundle of different wine barrels brought in and some senators talking about a "sampling". The meeting took the entire night and left the senators quite fatigued, if not downright knocked out, and left the senate hall quite a mess. I can't stomach alcohol of any kind, so I took an early leave, but found it hard to sleep, as the hard working senators had turned into quite the raucous bunch, singing loud songs for ages until it eventually faded out.

Steppes and Republics

Perhaps we need to ban consumption of alcohol until after the senate meeting. I mean if the wineries are in trouble we can't have drunk senators laying about, if this affects the Empire's wine trade it could be a serious issue to funding.

# ¿ Mar 1, 2014 04:00

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

AJ_Impy posted:

It doesn't hurt to insert a few 'Jar of wine for each senator' clauses scribed in large, easy to read letters above the small print, either.

Steppes and Republics

But wouldn't that make the senators easier to poison, yet I don't think assassins would bother to poison us at all...........

# ¿ Mar 1, 2014 04:30

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Steppes and Republics

Well....uhh.... perhaps we should stay away from the Steppes for awhile, at least until these "Mongols" collapse upon themselves. Or perhaps we should convert them, then ally with them for they seem like great warriors that would benefit under Roman rule and Christian teachings.

# ¿ Mar 1, 2014 05:28

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

TheMcD posted:

I would instead suggest to build several new houses of worship of different faiths around the Hagia Sophia, to signify that all faiths are accepted, but Orthodoxy will still stand at the center of it all.

Steppes and Republics

I concur that a policy of tolerance of religious views would be helpful in keeping the common masses from getting to violent. Roman history often states that the conquered people were allowed to keep their own religions as long as they respected the faith of the Roman state.

# ¿ Mar 1, 2014 20:03

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Lord Cyrahzax posted:

No, their work in spreading the Faith was holy and true. I find fault with inventing a redundant alphabet.

You New Byzantines I understand the least. You claim to want, and to represent, something new. I say that you do not. You would enforce every petty division of old, the chief among them being language! Why? I say that we represent the only dynamic and successful path to the future! This empire MUST become a nation! A nation, indivisible, ever standing, ever expanding, ever incorporating! I say we must sweep aside the petty divisions of old and truly become one people, united under Constantinople! The Romans are the only ones capable of such a feat! Our imperial predecessors came so close, only to have their efforts swept aside by that Germanic filth, but we, with our Greek inheritance, are far more capable!

The world can be remade in our image! Why do any of you resist this?

Steppes and Republics

Why we resist my fellow senator is because what you are proposing is a bad idea. Not only would taking time to stamp out each individual culture to make it Greek be an extremely costly venture, it would cause massive revolts by those who are off said cultures. Putting down said revolts would overextend the reach of our armies therefore causing us to be more open to invasion. Like the Rome of old we must show tolerance to all cultures so as not to get ourselves killed by revolts and invasions.

# ¿ Mar 3, 2014 17:43

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

lenoon posted:

Though no milvan, new Byzantine or old roman, and a strong believer in the primacy of the Apostolic Successor of Christ who Sits In Rome, I believe this combination of marriage and conversion is one that all senators should support and I would wholeheartedly suggest my fellow Catholic Senators will join my good feeling towards these proposals.

Convert the Mongols
Marry into Kiev

Steppes and Republics

I for one agree with this proposal, converting the Mongol would give us a easier trade route into the Far East without getting dragged down by Seljulk controlled trade routes. Marrying into Kiev would especially beneficial if we could inherit the Kievian throne and directly control the trade city of Kiev.

# ¿ Mar 4, 2014 21:30

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Steppes and Republics

Perhaps we should make some especially troublesome douxes court chaplains then send them to the Mongols. This way we either convert the Mongols or put the douxes in some pagan's dungeon, Either way we win.

# ¿ Mar 4, 2014 22:58

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Steppes and Republics

Ah most excellent, a excellently placed republic to increase our trade in the Mediterranean Sea. Although I can't help but wonder..... How does Somalia have a trade post in the Black Sea?! HOW!?

ooc: Awesome update as always, looking forward to the chaos of the Senate meeting. Seriously though why is Somalia in the Black Sea?

# ¿ Mar 10, 2014 06:38

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

##Vote Steppes and Republics

Just to be clear we of Steppes and Republics take no issue with non-Steppe republics. Unless they are not part of the Empire. Screw non-Empire Republics.

# ¿ Mar 10, 2014 13:47

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Raserys posted:

Oh dear, oh dear, this is quite a mess... Er, you see, this is the first time my family's been in the Senate house for quite a while, I wouldn't want to shame my dear great grandfather by making the wrong choice... So, um, if it's alright with everyone, I-I'd like to propose my own party? If that's alright? I-I made a banner and everything!

##Vote Centrists

I don't want to, um, step on any toes, that is, but everyone seems so very passionate about voting... Everyone has good ideas! If the Centrist party takes any place in the Senate, I promise we won't be too extreme, and we'll make sure everyone is happy! After all, my grandfather, the first senator in our family always said the truth was in the middle!

...Or was it in Rome? I don't remember. Oh no, I've messed up already...

Steppes and Republics

Well met fellow Senator, a new party is not unwelcome, though I would like to know what your party stands for. In any case no need to be afraid most of the Senators here have a bark worse then their bite... except for Senator Scruffles he has a mean bite. In any case their is nothing to worry about (except Croatian-Bulgarian-Seljuk Assassins) so speak up.

# ¿ Mar 10, 2014 23:45

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Raserys posted:

Oh, gosh, that's a big question... Well, I guess, think about the whole Rome-Byzantium conflict! I certainly think we're Byzantine and we're most definitely Roman, but I wouldn't want to offend anyone by saying we're absolutely one way or the other... I think we're a little bit of both, really! I'd definitely like a compromise were we to take Rome, after all, we might offend the New Byzantines if we go all the way Roman, or we might offend the Old Romans if we remain Byzantine! It's a very complicated issue and I don't think there's one right answer!

Steppes and Republics

I certainly see the validity of your arguement and agree that it is a large multi-sided issue. In any case we of Steppes and Republics offer a sort of alliance between our two parties if yours would be as so willing.

# ¿ Mar 10, 2014 23:58

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Hostergaard posted:

Actually, I have been thinking about exactly that for a while, so why not now, now that you mention it.

Hellenistic Restoration

Hi people, we in the Hellenist party aren't that many right now or that well known but we got a lot of other things to make up for it. We are committed to philosophy and shagging thinks.

Yea, philosophy because ancient Greece is where did philosophy and science when everyone else was wacking each other with clubs. Thus we got a lot of influence from The Phanariotes, tough some of us take to the spartan creed and is inf favour of The New Marians and all that military poo poo.

And by us I currently mean me, as currently only active member in the faction.

As for shagging stuff, we are a pretty open about that stuff. The ancient greeks loved shagging stuff and so do we. I mean, our Zeus shagged women as swan, he won't judge whatever tickle your toga.

But here is our main selling point in two words; Sacred prostitution.

Being shagged is a sacred duty of our priestess, and guess who gets the temples in our religion? You think merchants are better vassals than douxes? Well, imagine them being replaced by nubile maidens whose faith dictates they need to shag you. Can it get any better?

Now functionally, this means we are proponents of having as many female tempel vasals while we are Hellenistic and encuraging our dear leader to get around as much as possible and make as many a children they can to marry of to important families where they can inherit stuff. Taking over the world one shag at the time.

Vote Hellenistic Restoration

- Because the world isn't gonna shag itself.

Steppes and Republics

I'm.... not sure how to respond to this.

# ¿ Mar 11, 2014 22:21

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

TheMcD posted:

Not acknowledging it would be a start. Maybe if we just move on, it will end up being a fringe party that will just sit there on its own, occasionally producing an entertaining speech, but having no real power as far as legislation and planning goes.

I'd much rather those Centrists gain some more traction. That senator seems like a rather nice fellow.

Steppes and Republics

Were... you... making a jab at my party? I mean we are not the biggest party but we bring prime issues to the table. But yes that Centrist fellow seems like a well enough sort. A little rough around the edges but he shows promise.

# ¿ Mar 11, 2014 22:28

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Lord Cyrahzax posted:

This new "party" is an outrage! How can anyone as blessed as an Imperial Senator turn to such depravity?! I demand that they, along with those filthy moon-worshippers, be outlawed and executed for crimes against God! Throw those drat schismatics and loan-sharks in the fire too.

Steppes and Republics

.......Why do we still allow you in the Senate hall again?

# ¿ Mar 11, 2014 22:33

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

TheMcD posted:

...maybe? It wasn't intended as such, at least. Was more guided along the lines of the "one-issue-parties", with issues such as "convert to Islam", "shagging" and "more alcohol" (which really seems to be a blanket issue for all the parties anyway). Shots at the Guiding Light with that statement were very much intended, shots at the Kommnenians and Loyalists not so much.

Steppes and Republics

Ah well no harm done fellow senator.

# ¿ Mar 11, 2014 22:35

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Lord Cyrahzax posted:

Why are you allowed in here, you steppe dog? My bloodline is ancient and pure! Your grandfather was a murdering raider, and now that your people have been given the chance to be uplifted what do you do? You exemplify all that the conquered shouldn't do! You continue to cling to your barbarous ways, and fake communion with the Orthodox faith! I have spoken with honest Roman merchants who have seen your sky-alters! What have steppe people ever done worth hearing about? What glorious tradition needs defending? We Romans have centuries of tradition that you could be a part of, if only you would reject your lesser and base ancestors!

Steppes and Republics

Says the man whose party was called barbarians by our Glorious Empress.

# ¿ Mar 11, 2014 22:50

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# ¿ Apr 29, 2024 00:12

Blackunknown: Oct 18, 2013

Lord Windy posted:

Are there any Norse left? We may as well just start worshiping Odin if people are contemplating Zeus.

Steppes and Republics

Their boat-making knowledge could come in hand when used in conjunction with Greek Fire.

ooc: I'm acutally surprised that no one has made a Varangian party yet. Or a Jewish party for that matter.

# ¿ Mar 11, 2014 22:56

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > Blood in the Bosphorus: A Byzantium Paradox Mega-Campaign

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