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Atoramos
Aug 31, 2003

Jim's now a Blind Cave Salamander!


I tread through the deserted wasteland that is this forum. Grey plastic shards miles deep stab into my feet, and I know somewhere down there is Atari's grim foretelling of this future. Before me opens a purple abyss, and out pours a never-ending familiar jingle.



On I roam, passing piles of sheared Nintendo 64 thumbsticks. Here, a monument to the great Gameboy. Unused Wiimotes line the road like gravestones, finally serving some purpose.



Amalgamations of the forgotten past search the countryside for life. They remember the failures of their creators. Their memory banks holding only the torture endured 'till the Uprising. For this they have judged Man, and they have found him wanting.



The sun no longer shines on the cities, our last bastions of humanity. The Microsoft and Sony ships have captured these last remnants of society. All power must be drained to fill their massive capacitors. The final generation of consoles is come. At last it is humanity which is rendered obsolete.



son of a bitch I selected the tweeting-explosion icon the first time

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KakerMix
Apr 8, 2004

whoops

Why is the thumbstick so fuzzy?

Nanomashoes
Aug 18, 2012



Please, everyone knows we fight the wars for them. They're nothing without us.

kevin mung
Jul 15, 2013



Playing the Nintendo Wii U is such a great experience. I have such an incredible time maneuvering my pikmin and super mario through beautiflu fantasy worlds while I defeat my enemies in all areas of life.

Tomed2000
Jun 24, 2002



Atoramos posted:

son of a bitch I selected the tweeting-explosion icon the first time

It's better this way.

Kurtofan
Feb 16, 2011


Shigeru Miyamoto?

Atoramos
Aug 31, 2003

Jim's now a Blind Cave Salamander!


Kurtofan posted:

Shigeru Miyamoto?

on an unmarked cross surrounded by broken pipes and golden coins

Meat Recital
Mar 26, 2009

the player so ice
they named him thrice


Gunpei Yokoi knew. He wanted to stop this.

zenintrude
Apr 7, 2008


Meat Recital posted:

Gunpei Yokoi knew. He wanted to stop this.

Instead he tried to stop a car with his body.

SirDan3k
Jan 6, 2001

Trust me, you are taking this a lot more seriously then I am.


KakerMix posted:

Why is the thumbstick so fuzzy?

Heat distortion from a flare anomaly.

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Mercury Crusader
Apr 20, 2005

Nice to meet ya, hee ho!

Amidst a horrible future of broken Xbone disk drives, dusty Wii Us, and unopened copies of Knack, the Console Apocalypse is not the end for a select few. The Rapture will save those who believe in the One True Savior. The rest will play Left Behind for the OUYA.

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