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Hockles
Dec 25, 2007

Resident of Camp Blood
Crystal Lake



Last year's thread

Goons, I am bringing this back for another year and I am starting early this time. In case you don't have archives to read last year's thread, here is a summary.

I want to take goons through their hockey career using NHL 14. I am going to create you in NHL 14, and track your progress until you retire, NHL 15 comes out, or I get bored with this. Last year, I made it from May to late August, so I expect it to last for months again. As far as player creation goes, I will randomly assign them Overall ratings and potential grades. Once I get a list of players, I will place you all on a CHL team and you'll get entered into the 2014 entry draft or the 2015 entry draft. I will try to set attributes so that you will get decent NHL ice-time within the first year or two. Some may have to be in the AHL for a short time, and there may be somebody I randomly select that has high enough stats to start immediately. I will focus player creation on the player type you choose (SNP get high shooting accuracy, PLY get high passing, etc). Last year I did updates on December 1st, The All-Star Break, the Trade Deadline, and then playoffs. It seemed to work out well, so I will do it again. I will also be bringing back a Google Spreadsheet with everyone's stats. Last year, I had 44 registrants. This year I am going to cut it off at 40. From what I can tell, I can only do 2 draft classes. So the first 20 get Class of '14, last 20 get class of '15. However, I would like to give people who did not participate last year first dibs on registration.

Registration is closed.

What I need from you:
Name:
Number:
Height:
Weight:
Race:
Location:
Handedness: (Goalies, pick one: http://i.imgur.com/T0YsBG4.jpg )
Position:
Player Type:
Equipment Brand:

Forward Player Types: Playmaker, Sniper, Power Forward, Two-Way Forward, Grinder, Enforcer
Defensemen Player Types: Offensive Defenseman, Defensive Defenseman, Two-Way Defenseman, Enforcer
Goalie Player Types: Butterfly, Stand-Up, Hybrid


Class of 2014
  1. C -- Foo Bar // GuavaMoment (TWF)
  2. D -- Aurora Steidl // Aurora (TWD)
  3. C -- Humongous Wang // JawKnee (PWF)
  4. D -- Spam Tron // Spamtron7000 (OFD)
  5. RW -- Rod Dangler // Paramemetic (PLY)
  6. RW -- Buggy Skill // bewbies (SNP)
  7. D -- Pierre-Paul Poutine // Xtanstic (TWD)
  8. C -- Ricky Fantastic // Red Red Blue (PLY)
  9. C -- Charlie Conway // Heaf (PLY)
  10. LW -- Alex Jones // AboveAndBeyond (PLY)
  11. RW -- Itchy Chiggers // Captain Internet (SNP)
  12. C -- sba // sba (PWF)
  13. C -- Teemu Vittunen // Ceyton (PWF)
  14. D -- Sasha Smashnikov // HELLO LADIES (TWD)
  15. C -- Andrew Kilza // Kilza (SNP)
  16. LW -- Stabby McStabson // stab (GRN)
  17. LW -- Ewic Windros // THE MACHO MAN (PWF)
  18. D -- Oldman Hat // CDX (OFD)
  19. C -- Hocket Roboy // Verviticus (PLY)
  20. D -- Les Lazaruk // Guignol (DFD)

Goalies
  1. G -- Fat Cow // Luminous Cow (HYB)
  2. G -- Quincey Pepperdick // LumpyGumby (BUT)
  3. G -- Big McLargeHuge // gently caress COREY PERRY (STD)
  4. G -- Dennis Bergkamp // real_scud (BUT)
  5. G -- Ron Hextall Jr // EvilJimmyCarter (HYB)

Class of 2015
  1. C -- Hockles // Hockles (PLY)
  2. D -- Potatoes O'Bourke // Bradf0rd (ENF)
  3. RW -- Punchki Borkiwicz // Pleads (ENF)
  4. LW -- Emil Rutkowski // Rutkowski (TWF)
  5. RW -- Theo McFlurry // FurnaceFace (PLY)
  6. C -- Aleksandr Luzhin // Stickarts (PLY)
  7. LW -- Gunnar Stahl // fits (PWF)
  8. C -- Halu Satonaka // Rene Bork (SNP)
  9. D -- Bjorn Lundgren // Southpaw (TWD)
  10. RW -- He Hate Me // CBJSprague24 (SNP)
  11. LW -- Adam Banks // Jagwires (SNP)
  12. LW -- Jimmy O'Rourke // lonelywurm (GRN)
  13. RW -- Borka Borkason // Anders (PWF)
  14. C -- Badabing Buckaroo // DOOP (PWF)
  15. D -- Brian Urlacher // IcePhoenix (ENF)
  16. LW -- Moses White // enjoyable human being Guy (PWF)
  17. C -- Chap Buttworth // Dubious (SNP)
  18. RW -- Alex Guibeau // Knowlue (SNP)
  19. C -- Fernando Vando // Vando (SNP)
  20. D -- That Guyclint // thatguyclint (OFD)

Goalies
  1. G -- Dek Paynuss // Rotten Cookies (BUT)
  2. G -- Cal Ripken Jr // SAMB0 (HYB)
  3. G -- Tripp Palin // I AM RucKuS (HYB)
  4. G -- Martijn van der Veen // DrunkCanuck (BUT)
  5. G -- Soup Athanatos // Athanatos (BUT)

Hockles fucked around with this message at Feb 17, 2014 around 06:01

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Hockles
Dec 25, 2007

Resident of Camp Blood
Crystal Lake



Google Docs link: http://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2014

CHL Photoshoot: Click Here

2014 NHL Entry Draft: Begins Here

2015 NHL Entry Draft: Begins Here

Hockles fucked around with this message at Feb 11, 2014 around 00:01

Rutkowski
Apr 27, 2008

CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS GUY?


Name: Emil Rutkowski
Number: 7
Height: 191
Weight: 86
Race: Cacausian
Location: Stockholm, Sweden(Drakkar again as CHL team if possible)
Handedness: Rightie
Position: LW
Player Type: Two-Way Forward(more like Martin Hanzal than Pavel Datsyuk)
Equipment Brand: Rebellion

Class of 2015

Pleads
Jun 9, 2005

Pew pew pew



Hockles posted:

What I need from you:
Name: Punchki Borkiwicz
Number: 32
Height: 6'1"
Weight: 205
Race: LILY WHITE
Location: Radom, Poland
Handedness: Right
Position: RW
Player Type: Enforcer
Equipment Brand: CCM
CHL import wutup

e: Vapour skates

Pleads fucked around with this message at Feb 4, 2014 around 02:51

GuavaMoment
Aug 13, 2006

YouTube dude


Name: Foo Bar
Number: 0 (if it won't let you, then, uh, 6?)
Height: 5'5"
Weight: 150 lbs
Race: Asian
Location: Tokyo, Japan
Handedness: Left
Position: Center
Player Type: Two-Way Forward
Equipment Brand: The one that Crosby keeps hocking in commercials.

Furnaceface
Oct 21, 2004



This owned so much last time. If not enough new people show up Id like another go at it.

Name: Theo McFlurry
Number: 14
Height: 5'6
Weight: 175
Race: Caucasian
Location: Barrie, Ontario
Handedness: Right
Position: RW
Player Type: Playmaker
Equipment Brand: CCM

Aurora
Jan 7, 2008

Runs in the family.


Name: Aurora Steidl
Number: 53
Height: 5'11"
Weight: 200
Race: Caucasian
Location: Hamburg, Germany
Handedness: Right
Position: D
Player Type: Two-Way Defenseman
Equipment Brand: CCM

JawKnee
Mar 24, 2007



Name: Humongous Wang
Number: 66
Height: 6'4"
Weight: 200lbs
Race: Asian
Location: Vancouver
Handedness: Righty
Position: Center
Player Type: Power Forward
Equipment Brand: CCM

(Wang has a announcer name recorded )

JawKnee fucked around with this message at Feb 4, 2014 around 02:42

Spamtron7000
Oct 15, 2003

I broke up with a girl because her older sister was too hot and I ended up preferring masturbating while thinking about the older sister vs. actually sleeping with the younger.


Name: Spam Tron
Number: 20
Height: 6'0"
Weight: 208
Race: Caucasian
Location: San Diego, CA
Handedness: right
Position: Defenseman
Player Type: Offensive defenseman
Equipment Brand: CCM

Bradf0rd
Jun 16, 2008

"The shortest and surest way to live with honor in the world, is to be in reality what we would appear to be; and if we observe, we shall find, that all human virtues increase and strengthen themselves by the practice of BORK BORK BORK." - Socrates


Name: Potatoes O'Bourke
Number: 40
Height: 6'5"
Weight: 235
Race: Caucasian
Location: Yellowknife, Yukon Territory
Handedness: Right
Position: D
Player Type: Enforcer
Equipment Brand: Bauer

Class of 2015 please.

Drunk Canuck
Jan 9, 2010

Robots ruin all the fun of a good adventure.


Name: Martijn van der Veen
Number: 70
Height: 6'1
Weight: 183
Race: Caucasian
Location: Hoorn, Netherlands
Handedness: Regular
Position: Goalie
Player Type: Butterfly
Equipment Brand: RBK

Class of '14


Heck yes let's have some fun

Drunk Canuck fucked around with this message at Feb 4, 2014 around 04:43

Paramemetic
Sep 29, 2003

A gift from Coyote! Nothing could possibly go wrong here!


Name: Rod Dangler
Number: 23
Height: 6'3"
Weight: 190
Race: Caucasian
Location: MD, USA
Handedness: Right
Position: RW
Player Type: Playmaker
Equipment Brand: RBK

Paramemetic fucked around with this message at Feb 4, 2014 around 02:38

bewbies
Sep 23, 2003



Name: Buggy Skill
Number: 16
Height: 5'11
Weight: 205
Race: whitey
Location: Belleville
Handedness: R
Position: RW
Player Type: Snyper
Equipment Brand: Cooper all the way

Luminous Cow
Nov 2, 2007

Well you know there should be no law
on people that want to smoke a little dope.
Well you know it's good for your head
And it relax your body don't you know.



Name: Fat Cow
Number: Random
Height: 6' 4"
Weight: Maximum
Race: Black as hell
Location: Chicago
Handedness: Full Right
Position: Goalie
Player Type: I have no idea what this means
Equipment Brand: Rebellion because it sounds cool

Xtanstic
Nov 22, 2007

I have the same feeling every time: my head's ready to explode, I want to kill somebody cutting across the blue line and I want to score the goal and celebrate.

Name: Pierre-Paul Poutine
Number: 11
Height: 6'2
Weight: 205
Race: Caucasian
Location: Chicoutimi, QC
Handedness: Right
Position: D
Player Type: TWD
Equipment Brand: CCM

Red Red Blue
Feb 11, 2007



Name: Ricky Fantastic
Number: 18
Height: 6'1
Weight: 190
Race: Caucasian
Location: Houston, Texas
Handedness: Right
Position: C
Player Type: Playmaker
Equipment Brand: CCM

Heaf
Jan 15, 2008

People say we suck at sports but they don't understand
It's hard to catch with holes right through your hands

Name: Charlie Conway
Number: 96
Height: 6' 2"
Weight: 190 pounds
Race: White
Location: Minneapolis, Minnesota
Handedness: Right
Position: Center
Player Type: Playmaker
Equipment Brand: Bauer

Quack. Quack. Triple dekes coming to the Western league.

LumpyGumby
Feb 22, 2012

Take that, Mutt Cooke, this one's for Bark Savard!


PHOTO BY DOG FAN
I AM DOG


Name: Quincey Pepperdick.
Number: 13
Height: 6,0
Weight: 200
Race: White
Location: Denver, Colorado
Handedness: regular
Position: Goalie
Player Type: butterfly
Equipment Brand: CCM

Groovy.

LumpyGumby fucked around with this message at Feb 4, 2014 around 02:51

AAB
Nov 5, 2010



Name: Alex Jones
Number: 19
Height: 6'2
Weight: 175
Race: Caucasian
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Handedness: Left
Position: LW
Player Type: Playmaker
Equipment Brand: Graf or CCM

Captain Internet
Apr 20, 2005
Seriously serious.

Name: Itchy Chiggers
Number: 42
Height: 6'1
Weight: 195
Race: Caucasian
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Handedness: Right
Position: RW
Player Type: Sniper
Equipment Brand: CCM or Reebok

sba
Jul 9, 2001

I LIKE HERTLS

Name: ess beeay
Number: 95
Height: 6'3
Weight: 225
Race: Caucasian
Location: Sacramento, CA
Handedness: Right
Position: C
Player Type: PWF
Equipment Brand: Easton

Ceyton
Oct 9, 2004

IT IS HARAAM TO DRAW OR SKETCH MYSTICAL CREATURES


Name: Teemu Vittunen
Number: 10
Height: 6'1"
Weight: 210
Race: Finnish
Location: Helsinki, Finland
Handedness: Left
Position: LW
Player Type: Power Forward
Equipment Brand: Bauer

Perkele!

DOOP
Sep 3, 2011

I post like Jeff George fucks - Boogie Fever



Name: Badabing Buckaroo
Number: 42
Height: 6'3
Weight: 210+
Race: Pale
Location: Pennsylvania
Handedness: Right
Position: C
Player Type: Power Forward
Equipment Brand: Rebellion

Eric Lindros 2.0 please

HELLO LADIES
Feb 15, 2008

B is for Boyle
Grizzled and scary
Hits all the shits out of
FUCK COREY PERRY


Name: Sasha Smashnikov
Number: 20
Height: 6'2"
Weight: 235
Race: White
Location: St. Petersburg, Russia
Handedness: Left
Position: Defense
Player Type: 2-way defenseman
Equipment Brand: Bauer

If we get a choice of CHL teams I'd like to be an Ottawa 67

Kilza
Oct 3, 2013


Name: Andrew Kilza
Number: 97
Height: 6'2"
Weight: 195 lbs
Race: Caucasian
Location: Edmonton, AB
Handedness: Right
Position: C
Player Type: Sniper
Equipment Brand: Bauer

e: If we're allowed to choose our CHL team, then throw me on the Oil Kings, thanks.

Kilza fucked around with this message at Feb 4, 2014 around 03:38

Athanatos
Jun 7, 2006

Diligence is the mother of Luck


Name: Soup Athanatos
Number: 4
Height: 6'3
Weight: 200
Race: Cracker
Location: Illinois
Handedness: Full Righty
Position: Goalie
Player Type: butterfly
Equipment Brand: Hockey

Athanatos fucked around with this message at Feb 4, 2014 around 20:56

stab
Feb 12, 2003
Logic dictates over "human rights".

If any of my staff ever dared to have a bottle of water at their register I'd kill them


- A Fuckwit


Name: stabby mcstabson
Number: 32
Height: 6'3
Weight: 220
Race: Caucasian
Location: montreal canada
Handedness: i shoot with my left hand at the bottom so does that make me a lefty
Position: lw
Player Type: agitator grinder
Equipment Brand: jofa

Class of 2014 please.

Stickarts
Dec 21, 2003

'It occurred to me that I had a fine brain in beautiful working order and that I might as well use it.'

This sounds stellar.

Name: Aleksandr Ivanovich Luzhin
Number: 17
Height: 6'5"
Weight: 215 lbs
Race: Caucasian
Location: Regina, SK
Handedness: Right
Position: C
Player Type: Joe Thornton
Equipment Brand: Cooper(alls). Ok CCM.


Class of '14, REGINA PATS IF I CAN DO THAT

fits
Jan 1, 2008

Do you know whose bones are on display here?
Your bones.
My bones.
Bone's bones.
Bone bone bone.

I've been reading through the other thread and its pretty entertaining, too

What I need from you:
Name: Gunnar Stahl
Number: 9
Height: 6'3"
Weight: 225
Race: Caucasian
Location: Iceland
Handedness: Right
Position: LW
Player Type: Power Forward
Equipment Brand: CCM
Draft Class: 2014
CHL Team: WHL if possible

Rene Bork
Mar 20, 2007

Get to Know Your Canadiens

Today's Question: Spell your name backwards.

"K....R.....O...B "

Name: Halu Satonaka
Number: 9
Height: 5'8
Weight: 170
Race: Asian
Location: Aomori City, JPN
Handedness: Right
Position: C
Player Type: Sniper
Equipment Brand: Koho

Class of '15 is cool with me.

Rotten Cookies
Nov 11, 2008

"Everybody relax. I'm here."


Name: Dek Paynuss
Number: 37
Height: 6'2"
Weight: 170
Race: Caucasian
Location: Medicine Hat
Handedness: Regular
Position: Goal
Player Type: Standup
Equipment Brand: Sherwood? (Bauer if not?)

Class o' 14 I s'pose

Hockles
Dec 25, 2007

Resident of Camp Blood
Crystal Lake



1) Class of 2014 is all filled for skaters.
2) Even though some people who participated last year have put in their players, I may have to be a bad guy and bump some of you for a new player.

Southpaw
Mar 9, 2006


Name: Bjorn Lundgren
Number: 20
Height: 6' 2"
Weight: 215
Race: Whitey
Location: Portland, Oregon
Handedness: (Goalies, pick one: http://i.imgur.com/T0YsBG4.jpg ) L
Position: D
Player Type: 2wD
Equipment Brand: Graf
CHL Team: The Best. (Portland)

Guignol
Nov 23, 2006

Ice Hockey: a game so mean, even the guys driving the Zambonis are wearing masks.


What I need from you:
Name: Les Lazaruk
Number: 26
Height: 5'9
Weight: 210lbs
Race: White
Location: Saskatoon, SK
Handedness: Lefty
Position: D
Player Type: Defensive Defenseman
Equipment Brand: Bauer

Class of 2015 is just fine by me, and make the CHL team the Blades if possible, please and thank you!

CBJSprague24
Dec 5, 2010

Jeff's watching...


Name: He Hate Me
Number: 24 (25 or 64 if 24 is taken)
Height: 5'4"
Weight: 140
Race: White
Location: Ohio
Handedness: Right
Position: RW
Player Type: SNP
Equipment Brand: RBK

e- loving , I didn't know the actual He Hate Me's number was 24 when I picked the number.

CBJSprague24 fucked around with this message at Feb 4, 2014 around 03:55

lonelywurm
Aug 10, 2009


Name: Jimmy O'Rourke
Number: 27
Height: 6'1"
Weight: 210
Race: white
Location: Lethbridge, AB
Handedness: Left
Position: LW
Player Type: Grinder
Equipment Brand: Bauer

Ed: CHL team indifferent, but the Hurricanes are pretty convenient.

lonelywurm fucked around with this message at Feb 4, 2014 around 04:02

SAMB0
Jul 9, 2004

Space Bear.
Destroyer of Worlds.


Name: Cal Ripken JR
Number: 8
Height: 6'6
Weight: 210
Race: white
Location: Baltimore MD
Handedness: FR
Position: G
Player Type: HYB
Equipment Brand: Bauer

SAMB0 fucked around with this message at Feb 4, 2014 around 04:12

FUCK COREY PERRY
Apr 19, 2008

Corey Perry Asshole Chart
G:
ran
D: sacktapped
F: stomped on
face: punchable
cheapshots: NOT EN c'mon ref that was like a totes legit accident he hit his face off my elbow excuse me while I score four goals

Name: Big McLargeHuge
Number: 1
Height: Max
Weight: Max
Race: White as gently caress
Location: Greenland, or otherwise the most obscure country you can come from
Handedness: full-right
Position: Goalie
Player Type: stand-up
Equipment Brand: bright fuckin' pink pads bright fuckin' pink jason-mask

class of whatever

Hockles
Dec 25, 2007

Resident of Camp Blood
Crystal Lake



e: fine, nvm

Hockles fucked around with this message at Feb 4, 2014 around 04:13

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Furnaceface
Oct 21, 2004



Hockles posted:

FCP, you might want to pick a new goalie name. That was FurnaceFace's from last year.

It will bring him good luck, as he also made him a goalie.

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