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Smarmy Coworker
May 10, 2008

by XyloJW
comes now the king of bones!

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

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Good soup!
Nov 2, 2010

His own mind was destroyed by his incredible power. What an all-mighty idiot! Yep, that's what he is! Heh heh heh heh

Ironed Idol
Nov 16, 2013

by XyloJW
and now your long journey has come to an end.

Crewmine
Apr 26, 2012
YORE DEAD FREEMEN

Smarmy Coworker
May 10, 2008

by XyloJW
you must gather your party before venturing forth

Wise Fwom Yo Gwave
Jan 9, 2006

Popping up from out of nowhere...


So many years ago, today

Vincent Van Goatse
Nov 8, 2006

Enjoy every sandwich.

Smellrose
Our words are backed with NUCLEAR WEAPONS.

Hobo By Design
Mar 17, 2009

Hobo By Intent or Robo Hobo?
Ramrod XTreme
Let's drop the moral posturing, shall we? We both know there's no altruism in this pursuit.

Frostillicus
Jul 20, 2002
Ouch! What do you do?

Smarmy Coworker
May 10, 2008

by XyloJW

Wise Fwom Yo Gwave posted:

So many years ago, today

Teron D Amun
Oct 9, 2010

pepito sanchez
Apr 3, 2004
I'm not mexican
For Aiur!

Fire in th-Fire in the h-Fire in the hole!

You must gather your party before venturing forth!

You have died of dysentery.

Ironed Idol
Nov 16, 2013

by XyloJW
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XL3Fi5reXBw

That 70s Shirt
Dec 6, 2006

What do you think I'm gonna do? I'm gonna save the fuckin' day!
"Where are you Marshall?"

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN
Apr 27, 2010


I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.


"You want a piece of me, boy?"

"Fire it up." "Slammin'"

"Oh, Is that it?"

MY BF LESLIE SAID
Jun 9, 2006

by Lowtax
So long gay bowser

illestG
Oct 8, 2009

KABOOOM BABY

Whorelord
May 1, 2013

Jump into the well...

we're watching you.... scum

Nanomashoes
Aug 18, 2012

Colonel: Raiden, are you receiving? We're (1) still here.
Raiden: How's that possible!? The AI was destroyed!
Colonel: Only (2) GW...
Raiden: Who are you?
Colonel: To begin with -- we're not what you'd call -- human.
Over the past two hundred years --
A kind of consciousness formed layer by layer in the crucible of the White House.
It's not unlike the way life started in the oceans four billion years ago.
The White House was our primordial soup, a base of evolution --
We are formless. We are the very discipline and morality that Americans invoke so often.
How can anyone hope to eliminate us? As long as this nation exists, so will we.
Raiden: Cut the crap! If you're immortal, why would you take away individual freedoms and censor the Net?
Rose: Jack, don't be silly.
Colonel: Don't you know that our plans have your interests -- not ours -- in mind?
Rose: Jack, listen carefully like a good boy!
Colonel: The mapping of the human genome was completed early this century.
As a result, the evolutionary log of the human race lay open to us.
Rose: We started with genetic engineering, and in the end, we succeeded in digitizing life itself.
Colonel: But there are things not covered by genetic information.
Human memories, ideas. Culture. History.
Rose: Genes don't contain any record of human history.
Colonel: Is it something that should not be passed on?
Should that information be left at the mercy of nature?
Rose: We've always kept records of our lives. Through words, pictures, symbols... from tablets to books...
But not all the information was inherited by later generations.
Colonel: A small percentage of the whole was selected and processed, then passed on. Not unlike genes, really.
Rose: That's what history is, Jack.
Colonel: But in the current, digitized world,
trivial information is accumulating every second, preserved in all its triteness.
Never fading, always accessible.
Rose: Rumors about petty issues, misinterpretations, slander...
Colonel: All this junk data preserved in an unfiltered state, growing at an alarming rate.
Rose: It will only slow down social progress, reduce the rate of evolution.
Colonel: Raiden, you seem to think that our plan is one of censorship.
Raiden: Are you telling me it's not!?
Rose: You're being silly! What we propose to do is not to control content, but to create context.
Raiden: Create context?
Colonel: The digital society furthers human flaws and selectively rewards
development of convenient half-truths.
Just look at the strange juxtapositions of morality around you.
Rose: Billions spent on new weapons in order to humanely murder other humans.
Colonel: Rights of criminals are given more respect than the privacy of their victims.
Rose: Although there are people suffering in poverty, huge donations are made to protect endangered species.
Everyone grows up being told the same thing.
Colonel: Be nice to other people.
Rose: But beat out the competition!
Colonel: "You're special." "Believe in yourself and you will succeed."
Rose: But it's obvious from the start that only a few can succeed...
Colonel: You exercise your right to "freedom" and this is the result.
All rhetoric to avoid conflict and protect each other from hurt.
The untested truths spun by different interests continue to churn and accumulate
in the sandbox of political correctness and value systems.
Rose: Everyone withdraws into their own small gated community, afraid of a larger forum.
They stay inside their little ponds,
leaking whatever "truth" suits them into the growing cesspool of society at large.
Colonel: The different cardinal truths neither clash nor mesh.
No one is invalidated, but nobody is right.
Rose: Not even natural selection can take place here. The world is being engulfed in "truth."
Colonel: And this is the way the world ends. Not with a bang, but a whimper.
Rose: We're trying to stop that from happening.
Colonel: It's our responsibility as rulers.
Just as in genetics, unnecessary information and memory must be filtered out
to stimulate the evolution of the species.
Raiden: And you think you're qualified to decide what's necessary and not!?
Colonel: Absolutely. Who else could wade through the sea of garbage you people produce,
retrieve valuable truths and even interpret their meaning for later generations?
Rose: That's what it means to create context.
Raiden: I'll decide for myself what to believe and what to pass on!
Colonel: But is that even your own idea?
Rose: Or something Snake told you?
Raiden: Ahh
Colonel: That's the proof of your incompetence, right there.
You lack the qualifications to exercise free will.
Raiden: That's not true! I have the right --
Rose: Does something like a "self" exist inside of you?
Colonel: That which you call "self" serves as nothing more than a mask to cover your own being.
Rose: In this era of ready-made 'truths',
"self" is just something used to preserve those positive emotions that you occasionally feel...
Colonel: ...Another possibility is that "self" is a concept you conveniently borrowed under the logic
that it would endow you with some sense of strength...
Raiden: That's crap!
Colonel: Is it? Would you prefer that someone else tell you? Alright then. Explain it to him.
Rose: Jack, you're simply the best! And you got there all by yourself!
Raiden: Rrrr...
Colonel: Oh, what happened? Do you feel lost? Why not try a bit of soul-searching?
Rose: Don't think you'll find anything, though...
Colonel: Ironic that although "self" is something that you yourself fashioned,
every time something goes wrong, you turn around and place the blame on something else.
Rose: It's not my fault. It's not your fault.
Colonel: In denial, you simply resort to looking for another,
more convenient "truth" in order to make yourself feel better.
Rose: ...leaving behind in an instant the so-called "truth" you once embraced.
Colonel: Should someone like that be able to decide what is "truth"?
Rose: Should someone like you even have the right to decide?
Colonel: You've done nothing but abuse your freedom.
Rose: You don't deserve to be free!
Colonel: We're not the ones smothering the world. You are.
Rose: The individual is supposed to be weak. But far from powerless --
-- a single person has the potential to ruin the world.
Colonel: And the age of digitized communication has given even more power to the individual.
Too much power for an immature species.
Rose: Building a legacy involves figuring out what is wanted, and what needs to be done for that goal.
All this, you used to struggle with. Now, we think for you.
Colonel: We are your guardians after all.
Raiden: You want to control human thought? Human behavior?
Colonel: Of course. Anything can be quantified nowadays.
That's what this exercise was designed to prove.
Rose: You fell in love with me just as you were meant to, after all. Isn't that right, Jack?
Colonel: Ocelot was not told the whole truth, to say the least.
Rose: We rule an entire nation -- of what interest would a single soldier, no matter how able, be to us?
Colonel: The S3 Plan does not stand for Solid Snake Simulation.
What it does stand for is Selection for Societal Sanity...
Colonel: The S3 is a system for controlling human will and consciousness.
S3 is not you, a soldier trained in the image of Solid Snake.
It is -- a method, a protocol,
that created a circumstance that made you what you are.
Rose: So you see, we're the S3.
Not you.
Colonel: What you experienced was the final test of its effectiveness.
You heard what President Johnson said.
(President's Voice) "The Arsenal's 'GW' system is the key to their supremacy."
The objective of this exercise was to establish such a method.
Colonel: We used Shadow Moses as a paradigm for the exercise.
Rose: I wonder if you would have preferred a fantasy setting?
Colonel: We chose that backdrop because of its extreme circumstances.
It was an optimal test for S3's crisis management capacity.
If the model could trigger, control and solve this,
it would be ready for any contingency.
And now, we have our proof.
Colonel: Raiden, there are also reasons behind your selection.
Solidus raised plenty of other child soldiers. Do you know why we chose you over them?
It was because you were the only one who refused to acknowledge the past.
All the others remember what they were, and pay for it daily.
Rose: But you turn your back on everything you don't like.
You do whatever you like, see only the things you like, and for yourself alone.
Colonel: Yes -- Rose can attest to that.
Rose: You refused to see me for what I was. I lied to you, but I wanted to be caught.
You pretended to be understanding, to be a gentleman...
You never made a conscious attempt to reach out to me...
The only time you did was when I gave you no choice but to do so...
Raiden: I was just trying not to...
Rose: What? "Trying not to hurt me?" Dear, the one you were trying not to hurt was yourself!
Avoiding the truth under the guise of "kindness" is all that you did!
It occurred to you to do nothing but look out for yourself.
Even if you claim that it was for my sake, that feeling was nowhere to be seen.
In the end, everything was for your sake... I was never part of the picture.
Colonel: Ha, ha, ha...exactly right.
So you see, you're a perfect representative of the masses we need to protect.
This is why we chose you.
You accepted the fiction we've provided, obeyed our orders and did everything you were told to.
The exercise is a resounding success.
(Emma's Voice) "Didn't I tell you that GW was still incomplete? But not anymore, thanks to you."
Your persona, experiences, triumphs and defeats are nothing but byproducts.
The real objective was ensuring that we could generate and manipulate them.
It's taken a lot of time and money, but it was well worth it considering the results.
I think that's enough talk. It's time for the final exercise.
Raiden, take Solidus down.
Raiden: Think again! I'm through doing what I'm told!
Colonel: Oh really? Aren't you forgetting something?
(Olga's Voice) "If you die, my child dies. "
The termination of vital signals from your nanomachines means the death of Olga's child.
Not to mention the death of Rose. She's wired the same way.
Raiden: Rose -- does she actually exist?
Colonel: (Rose's Voice) "Of course I do, Jack! You have to beLIEve me!"
Raiden: drat...
Colonel: It will be a fight to the death.
Rose: Solidus, at least, wants you dead.
Colonel: We will collect the necessary data from this last fight, then we'll consider the exercise closed.
So, Jack the Ripper!
Will it be Solidus, the Patriots' creation?
Or you -- Solidus' creation?
Our beloved monsters -- enjoy yourselves.

Jack the Stripper
Feb 9, 2014

Your local cheese loving, wooden shoes wearing drug addict.
Send me out, with a bang

bitchtard
Dec 3, 2010

call me ishmael

Monkey Fracas
Sep 11, 2010

...but then you get to the end and a gorilla starts throwing barrels at you!
Grimey Drawer
whaddayao bouyin' heheheh

I'LL BUY IT AT A HIGH PRICE

Burning Mustache
Sep 4, 2006

Zaeed got stories.
Kasumi got loot.
All I got was a hole in my suit.
dee selection dis time of year is excellent



I WILL PAY
A FAIR PRICE

spank my snatch
Jun 4, 2009

COLDER THAN AN ICEBOX

COLD AS A GUN

Zzulu
May 15, 2009

(▰˘v˘▰)
zug zug

Fried Watermelon
Dec 29, 2008


STOP RIGHT THERE CRIMINAL SCUM

N'wah stole my sweetroll.

Ataru13
Jul 28, 2005

...Packing Space-Age Shit!
DEHUMANIZE YOURSELF AND FACE TO BLOODSHED.

Sole.Sushi
Feb 19, 2008

Seaweed!? Get the fuck out!
"Two skulls and two stones... The rest is just icing."

Titty Warlord
Apr 28, 2013
No need for bombs, when hate will do

*literally anything steven heck says*

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aaun3ZI9c_4

breaklaw
May 12, 2008
Shoryuken!!!

DerpAlert
Aug 31, 2009

Haulin' Ass, Gettin' Paid
TEN XXXTRA LARGE
Assuming direct control.

Shepherd?

icantfindaname
Jul 1, 2008


"wisely done, Mr.Freeman. I will see you up ahead."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S6na-eYxx2c

Monkey Fracas
Sep 11, 2010

...but then you get to the end and a gorilla starts throwing barrels at you!
Grimey Drawer
complete global saturation

Tinestram
Jan 13, 2006

Excalibur? More like "Needle"

Grimey Drawer

Clipperton posted:

Anothah visitah!

Stay awhile!

Stay ... FOREVAH!

Came here to post this

Jack the Stripper
Feb 9, 2014

Your local cheese loving, wooden shoes wearing drug addict.
CJ, you a buster. Straight up buster!

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN
Apr 27, 2010


I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.


OHHHH my car

Tinestram
Jan 13, 2006

Excalibur? More like "Needle"

Grimey Drawer
I LIVE

BEWARE

I HUNGER

RUN COWARD

RUN RUN RUN

Safety Scissors
Feb 21, 2012

by FactsAreUseless
You can wax on wax off all you like, I'm still kicking your rear end.

You sure know how to throw a party, no food, no drinks, and the only girl just left.

You're small time Saddler.

Team Jonny
Feb 1, 2010
Have you seen those warriors from Hammerfell?
They've got curved swords. CURVED. SWORDS.

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great big cardboard tube
Sep 3, 2003


hahahaha X-Men! Welcome... to die!!!

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