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de_dust
Jan 21, 2009

~*~السلام عليكم~*~


This has started to happen more and more lately (it just happened 5 minutes ago) but after relieving myself I am at full attention - even if it's not even a particularly large movement. I am worried that this makes me gay.

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concerned mom
Apr 22, 2003


think about what you just posted

Sid Delicious
Oct 31, 2007

this thread...it was made for me


ya sorry dude your book o how to suck dick is in the mail already

Matoi Ryuko
Jan 6, 2004



You're just gay for poop.

Sid Delicious
Oct 31, 2007

this thread...it was made for me


enjoyable human being

TDILZ
Feb 18, 2014

by Ralp


turned on by butt play?

Sid Delicious
Oct 31, 2007

this thread...it was made for me


concerned mom posted:

think about what you just posted

i really hate when other people do this, but this post/user name combo, just wow

drilldo squirt
Aug 18, 2006


Try jacking it while your pooping.

Dexters Secret
Sep 8, 2008

We could care less what others think about is, but at times, we do care and we fall apart. But when we do fall apart, we put each other back together. We do all this and we ask nothing in return. We are Onii and Imouto.


sometimes when i wake up in the middle of the night i have a raging boner and i'll need to pee real bad so I have to sit on the toilet and bend my whole body forward so my dick will point downward

Sid Delicious
Oct 31, 2007

this thread...it was made for me


Dexters Secret posted:

sometimes when i wake up in the middle of the night i have a raging boner and i need to pee at the same time so I have to sit on the toilet and bend my whole body forward so my dick will point downward

this but 24/7

pixelbaron
Mar 18, 2009



Dexters Secret posted:

sometimes when i wake up in the middle of the night i have a raging boner and i'll need to pee real bad so I have to sit on the toilet and bend my whole body forward so my dick will point downward

same

Pookum
Mar 5, 2011


Dexters Secret posted:

sometimes when i wake up in the middle of the night i have a raging boner and i'll need to pee real bad so I have to sit on the toilet and bend my whole body forward so my dick will point downward

idiot. real men stand and lean way forward with your hands on the wall behind the toilet and pee down in the bowl.

Dexters Secret
Sep 8, 2008

We could care less what others think about is, but at times, we do care and we fall apart. But when we do fall apart, we put each other back together. We do all this and we ask nothing in return. We are Onii and Imouto.


Pookum posted:

idiot. real men stand and lean way forward with your hands on the wall behind the toilet and pee down in the bowl.

that seems like a great way for piss to splash literally everywhere

de_dust
Jan 21, 2009

~*~السلام عليكم~*~


I hope didn't get the wrong idea, I don't have anything against gays. I use a communal toilet and am worried the others in there may draw the wrong conclusion and be awkward about it.

👨

Rubbergoose
Jul 13, 2006



Dexters Secret posted:

sometimes when i wake up in the middle of the night i have a raging boner and i'll need to pee real bad so I have to sit on the toilet and bend my whole body forward so my dick will point downward

this is the only reason i ever learned how to do a handstand

Saga
Aug 17, 2009


Your prostate is possibly enlarged. You should probably see your doctor about this (or at least ask the goon doctor, seriously).

If you get an erection during the rectal exam, then yes you may be gay. Be sure to insist on a guy doctor, otherwise how will you know for sure.

Prozach
Oct 30, 2013

He is the Super Bowl Champions.


Pookum posted:

idiot. real men stand and lean way forward with your hands on the wall behind the toilet and pee down in the bowl.

I thought real men stick their dick IN the bowl.

poo poo. Well I've been doing it wrong.

Spacedad
Sep 11, 2001

We go play orbital catch around the curvature of the earth, son.

There's an awful lot of 'does bodily function X causing a boner make me gay' questions from straight people out there.


The short answer is that only if you got that erection by thinking about sexy men.

Get a prostate exam though if you're not joking about dis btw. Yikes.

Rambling Robot
Sep 13, 2011

The Master's Art is indeed not made for plebeians.


concerned mom posted:

think about what you just posted

get out mom, i'm on the phone!

Disgusting Coward
Feb 17, 2014


Gay guys want things put IN their butt not taken out. You are the opposite of gay. A real Toggaf Yag.

Ivor Biggun
Apr 30, 2003

A big "Fuck You!" from the Keyhole nebula


Pookum posted:

idiot. real men stand and lean way forward with your hands on the wall behind the toilet and pee down in the bowl.

Real men stand on their deck and piss into the garden.

breadingbutter
Dec 28, 2013

no, just a drunken moron

uh there is like 30 genders now op you have a boner so you may be one of the male ones (but not certainly)

Savings Coupon
Mar 6, 2004


One time I was hiking and had to go poop in the woods and then a bear nearby got an erection.

whoflungpoop
Sep 9, 2004

With you and the constellations

Savings Coupon posted:

One time I was hiking and had to go poop in the woods and then a bear nearby got an erection.

only cause it smelled like sausage

Doctor Dogballs
Apr 1, 2007

0.00 posts per day

My rear end got a boner in it I mean. (I'm gay)

Jizz Festival
Oct 30, 2012


Anal sex does basically feel like taking a massive dump then having it slide back into you to go for another round over and over. Biggest difference is the magic happening to your prostate which is pretty difficult to explain, kinda like nice tingles coming from the base of your pee-pee.

Anyway hope this helps.

Hadrians Dong
Aug 31, 2008

HAILGAYSATAN
NOBUTTER


probably

Chum Scandal
Oct 30, 2003



whoflungpoop posted:

only cause it smelled like sausage

he meant the other kind of bear

sether01
Jun 17, 2005



sid and manlove are the pros, trust what they say

Decebal
Jan 6, 2010


how much fiber are you eating ? this is important.

Hadrians Dong
Aug 31, 2008

HAILGAYSATAN
NOBUTTER


Why didn't you post this in E/N?

Aesop Poprock
Oct 21, 2008

Can I get the desk dildo?


yeah you're probably a fag OP. i am too and i also do that

exquisite tea
Apr 21, 2007

and she told me, "Listen honey. There's hundreds of strong men out there. I like men who are kind, who are honest, men who can be open with me."

Spanish Manlove posted:

Why didn't you post this in E/N?

You have the power.

Hadrians Dong
Aug 31, 2008

HAILGAYSATAN
NOBUTTER


exquisite tea posted:

You have the power.

I don't know if the new book barn mod would like me moving this thread there

.lnk to the past
May 3, 2005

psoting while drunk

Dexters Secret posted:

sometimes when i wake up in the middle of the night i have a raging boner and i'll need to pee real bad so I have to sit on the toilet and bend my whole body forward so my dick will point downward

that;s what showers are for

exquisite tea
Apr 21, 2007

and she told me, "Listen honey. There's hundreds of strong men out there. I like men who are kind, who are honest, men who can be open with me."

Spanish Manlove posted:

I don't know if the new book barn mod would like me moving this thread there

Thread title could also double for the Truman Capote appreciation station.

Chum Scandal
Oct 30, 2003



Spanish Manlove posted:

I don't know if the new book barn mod would like me moving this thread there

just a few hours, come on

Nuudoru
Mar 1, 2013


Once I spent a good 50 minutes working a turd out of my rear end in a top hat and once it got out I got an orgasm. Does this make ME gay?

Rubbergoose
Jul 13, 2006



Nuudoru posted:

Once I spent a good 50 minutes working a turd out of my rear end in a top hat and once it got out I got an orgasm. Does this make ME gay?

All advice and information will be withheld until you make your own thread.

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Neurosis
Jun 10, 2003

All right, all right, spare me your life's story.


Pookum posted:

idiot. real men stand and lean way forward with your hands on the wall behind the toilet and pee down in the bowl.

Do this and piss will go loving everywhere. Even if you could have some modicum of control when you are barred up and furious you will often get that two streams poo poo going on.

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