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TheRat
Aug 30, 2006

Ravel posted:

I dont believe any of these. Mainly because I don't buy that the fastest players in European football from every league are coincidentally also the most technically able, aside from Valencia and Lennon.

Everyone knows that Messi and Ronaldo are absolutely stupidly fast though?

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TwoDogs1Cup
May 28, 2008

DOUGIE DOUGIE DOUGIE! MY LOVE, HE MAKES MY EMPTY HEART FULL! DOUGIE! THE BEST FOREVER THE BEST DOUGIEEE! <3 <3 - TwoDougies1Cup
Rooney though? Maybe in 2003

Modus Trollens
Sep 12, 2010

R. Mute posted:

re: Lukaku

Supposedly, Lukaku wants to stay at Everton, so if they somehow scrape together the cash...

wages

TheRat
Aug 30, 2006

TwoDogs1Cup posted:

Rooney though? Maybe in 2003

I know people love calling rooney fat and lazy, but he's probably got the highest work rate on the team and is, in fact, very fast.

Ravel
Dec 23, 2009

There's no story

TheRat posted:

Everyone knows that Messi and Ronaldo are absolutely stupidly fast though?

Right but I don't buy that Messi is any quicker than, say, Abate. Besides Messi isn't so much a sprinter as he is good at turning ninety degrees at top speed.

T Bowl
Feb 6, 2006

Shut up DUMMY

TheRat posted:

I know people love calling rooney fat and lazy, but he's probably got the highest work rate on the team and is, in fact, very fast.

Literally the only reason people say this is because he looks like he'd be fat and lazy. And has smoked.

TheRat
Aug 30, 2006

Ravel posted:

Right but I don't buy that Messi is any quicker than, say, Abate. Besides Messi isn't so much a sprinter as he is good at turning ninety degrees at top speed.

You just dont notice it because everything else he does is so good, but Messi's acceleration is godly.

tbp
Mar 1, 2008

DU WIRST NIEMALS ALLEINE MARSCHIEREN
He's fast over a few yards but slow after that for more info see that Kaka goal

Ravel
Dec 23, 2009

There's no story

TheRat posted:

You just dont notice it because everything else he does is so good, but Messi's acceleration is godly.

That's what I said he was good at - your list is of top speeds.

Blue Star Error
Jun 11, 2001

For this recipie you will need:
Football match (Halftime of), Celebrity Owner (Motivational speaking of), Sherry (Bottle of)
Micky Quinn claimed that over a yard he was the fastest man alive

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer
Remember when Sol Campbell was supposedly the fastest player in the league at 35 or whatever

Azerban
Oct 28, 2003



T Fowl posted:

Literally the only reason people say this is because he looks like he'd be fat and lazy. And has smoked.

http://www.abload.de/img/2_0_rooney-newzstz.gif (too big for imgur)

Ho Chi Meeeeee
Jun 13, 2008

let me shovel out your brains
hang my image in your skull
so I can be the vision
in your nightmares from now on
Rooney is going to be playing when he's 40 and it will be us lot who look like idiots.

Modus Trollens
Sep 12, 2010

Ho Chi Meeeeee posted:

Rooney is going to be playing when he's 40 and it will be us lot who look like idiots.

whose wife grandma is he going to shag

TwoDogs1Cup
May 28, 2008

DOUGIE DOUGIE DOUGIE! MY LOVE, HE MAKES MY EMPTY HEART FULL! DOUGIE! THE BEST FOREVER THE BEST DOUGIEEE! <3 <3 - TwoDougies1Cup

He's not that fast now though. That's like 5 years ago.

He's lost a lot of sprint speed as he's gotten older (and fatter) compared to someone like Ronaldo who's probably faster than he was

TheRat
Aug 30, 2006

TwoDogs1Cup posted:

He's not that fast now though. That's like 5 years ago.

He's lost a lot of sprint speed as he's gotten older (and fatter) compared to someone like Ronaldo who's probably faster than he was

Pretty sure that was last season, mate.

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer

Ho Chi Meeeeee posted:

Rooney is going to be playing when he's 40 and it will be us lot who look like idiots.

He's best friends with Ricky Hatton the moment his stamina goes he's going to balloon

not not luvd
Nov 17, 2006

My Arse!

TheRat posted:

Pretty sure that was last season, mate.

No it wasn't, mate.

Modus Trollens
Sep 12, 2010

not not luvd posted:

No it wasn't, mate.

isn't that the 8-2?

TheRat
Aug 30, 2006

Modus Trollens posted:

isn't that the 8-2?

United had their home kit in the 8-2.

E: My bad, it was 2010.

euroboy
Mar 24, 2004

TheRat posted:

Pretty sure that was last season, mate.

I'm guessing its 2009 or 2010, going by the arsenal kits

pik_d
Feb 24, 2006

follow the white dove





TRP Post of the Month October 2021
It was January 31, 2010 because Rooney scored away at Arsenal in the 37th minute for that game[citations not needed]

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer

TheRat posted:

United had their home kit in the 8-2.

E: My bad, it was 2010.

So 4 years ago then

Duncan Sperguson
Apr 21, 2010

The fastest footballer is Sylvain Distin, fraud list

Ravel
Dec 23, 2009

There's no story
it's from January 2010, it finished 1-3

e: beaten

not not luvd
Nov 17, 2006

My Arse!

euroboy posted:

I'm guessing its 2009 or 2010, going by the arsenal kits

Also Arshavin and Nasri in the gif.

TelekineticBear!
Feb 19, 2009

TheRat posted:

I remember there was some talk in the CL thread about a commentator calling Antonio Valencia one of the fastest players in the world and people (myself included) not believing it. Apparently it's true :stare:


(This test was done on star players, so that guy you know thats a sprinter and also sort of good at football doesnt count)

this must be over a pretty short distance as there is no loving way messi is that fast over anything more than 10 yards
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zyJ_1m2HCK0

TelekineticBear! fucked around with this message at 17:17 on Apr 3, 2014

blue footed boobie
Sep 14, 2012


UEFA SUPREMACY
Ramsey apparently has a chance of playing Sunday :getin: Nacho, too. He doesn't get a :getin:

TwoDogs1Cup
May 28, 2008

DOUGIE DOUGIE DOUGIE! MY LOVE, HE MAKES MY EMPTY HEART FULL! DOUGIE! THE BEST FOREVER THE BEST DOUGIEEE! <3 <3 - TwoDougies1Cup
Benteke has torn his achilles tendon and will miss the rest of the season and the world cup :(

sassassin
Apr 3, 2010

by Azathoth

blue footed boobie posted:

Ramsey apparently has a chance of getting injured again Sunday :getin:

Ming the Merciless
Aug 10, 2005
You're a beard with an idiot hanging off of it.

It would be great if that was the Rooney that showed up for England, but instead we get the Rooney who alternates between wandering around aimlessly and standing around with his hands on his hips looking upset.

Ho Chi Meeeeee
Jun 13, 2008

let me shovel out your brains
hang my image in your skull
so I can be the vision
in your nightmares from now on

TwoDogs1Cup posted:

Benteke has torn his achilles tendon and will miss the rest of the season and the world cup :(

Poor Villa.

Myssu
Sep 19, 2012




TwoDogs1Cup posted:

Benteke has torn his achilles tendon and will miss the rest of the season and the world cup :(

That's a real shame. I was hoping to see how far a full-strength Belgian team would get. Although would Benteke even be their first choice striker over Lukaku now? Or do they commonly play two up front?

Bodzilla
Mar 11, 2007

Beep beep, motherf*cker!
Don't worry, we've got Grant Holt!
:cripes:

R. Mute
Jul 27, 2011

Myssu posted:

That's a real shame. I was hoping to see how far a full-strength Belgian team would get. Although would Benteke even be their first choice striker over Lukaku now? Or do they commonly play two up front?
Wilmots likes playing Benteke, even during his earlier post-injury dip. We've got plenty of cover up front, though, but still. A real shame. I hope it's not bad as it looks.

Hardflip
Jul 21, 2007

TwoDogs1Cup posted:

Benteke has torn his achilles tendon and will miss the rest of the season and the world cup :(

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

Frankston
Jul 27, 2010


TwoDogs1Cup posted:

Benteke has torn his achilles tendon and will miss the rest of the season and the world cup :(

Hahaha

Ponce de Le0n
Jul 6, 2008

Father jailed for beating 3 kids after they wouldn't say who farted in his car

TwoDogs1Cup posted:

Benteke has torn his achilles tendon and will miss the rest of the season and the world cup :(

Rip big benteke you were good that one season and now we wont even see you at the world cup :(

Pissflaps
Oct 20, 2002

by VideoGames
I never did believe Belgium would amount to much this world cup.

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Ravel
Dec 23, 2009

There's no story
And now that Fellainis been exposed as dross, their team isn't looking nearly the dark horse people bleated on about eight months ago

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