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How about no sex crimes, I vote for no sex crimes.
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May 4, 2014 22:00
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Rap posted:Russell Wilson for divorcing his wife immediately after winning the Super Bowl He isn't a douche for no longer being in love with a woman. He did the right thing at the right time. If I were in his shoes... well, my feet would be cramped, but I can't blame him because I don't know his life.
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May 4, 2014 22:03
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Detroit_Dogg posted:How about no sex crimes, I vote for no sex crimes. The contest is literally named after sex crimes. Rap posted:Russell Wilson for divorcing his wife immediately after winning the Super Bowl Seconded
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May 4, 2014 22:04
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Chichevache posted:The contest is literally named after sex crimes. And I said in the first year it was run that sex crimes should be off the list, also pedophilia is already off the list so it's not that hard of a stretch.
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May 4, 2014 22:12
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Detroit_Dogg posted:And I said in the first year it was run that sex crimes should be off the list, also pedophilia is already off the list so it's not that hard of a stretch.
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May 4, 2014 22:16
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Basically if the reason you're being considered sounds like a plot to a Law and Order SVU episode I think it crosses over the douche line.
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May 4, 2014 22:23
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Detroit_Dogg posted:Basically if the reason you're being considered sounds like a plot to a Law and Order SVU episode I think it crosses over the douche line. 
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May 4, 2014 22:33
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how about we just vote how we feel and let that decide rather then haphazardly slapping some rules together so people vote ~the right way~
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May 4, 2014 22:34
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I nominate everybody on page 2 for raping my eyeballs
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May 4, 2014 22:41
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I'd just rather we didn't discuss cases that are incredibly depressing and/or disturbing. Guys like Darren Sharper aren't any less douchey/awful human beings even if they aren't subject to our Internet Justice.
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May 4, 2014 22:47
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Personally, I don't really have any strong opinions either way, I just find it amusing that every time someone says something along the lines of "Let's do X to prevent endless amounts of arguing" it triggers endless amounts of arguing 
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May 4, 2014 22:51
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My last post wasn't so much a continuation of the argument as it was disgusting joke
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May 4, 2014 22:58
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Theres a reason that the Fulmer cup died with a whimper. I realize that people want to be all hard in the name of INTERNET JUSTICE but no one wants to keep guys currently facing major criminal charges on the board. Winston? Mike Emmert? Richie Incognito? In. Rice, Hernandez and Sharper? Out.
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May 4, 2014 23:01
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I am just going to make this call now: If they are currently facing charges or in jail, it is a no go. I'll edit the OP to reflect this. There, now it's all about fun and internet justice reaching places where the law can't.
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May 5, 2014 00:12
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I nominate Jeff Fisher Former USC Trojan. Runs a dirty/hard-hitting team while also having a hand in the competition committee making rules for 'player safety'. Also was enough of a whiny douche to get Bernie Kosar canned from announcing while also casting aspersions on his character: quote:"Bernie's got his issues; they're well documented," Fisher said. "Kellen played well, he played hard, he made plays."
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May 5, 2014 00:22
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Mark Emmert for thinking that labor doesn't deserve to be compensated for their work. Ol' Burt Bielema for thinking that B1g T3n F00tb4ll is that way the whole nation should play. Tyler Bray on account of being Tyler Bray. Jameis Winston under the Roethlisberger rule.
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May 5, 2014 00:59
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Ben Has Tiny Weenus posted:I am just going to make this call now: If they are currently facing charges or in jail, it is a no go. I'll edit the OP to reflect this. Are we talking all charges or just those that are heinous. I would hate to have seen someone like Harvey Updyke excluded based on that rule (not that he is eligible this year, just as an example).
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May 5, 2014 03:34
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swickles posted:Are we talking all charges or just those that are heinous. I would hate to have seen someone like Harvey Updyke excluded based on that rule (not that he is eligible this year, just as an example). Heinous ones only. I think people can tell the difference, but if there is legitimate confusion, I'll make a call.
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May 5, 2014 07:29
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C. Everett Koop posted:Jameis Winston under the Roethlisberger rule. Also just for flat out being a huge loving dipshit and stealing crab legs from a Publix.
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May 5, 2014 11:43
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sweet thursday posted:C'mon now, what's the alternative? Cheating on her? Im using irony and jokes at a level well beyond your understanding, lil jueves
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May 5, 2014 14:37
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Rap posted:Im using irony and jokes at a level well beyond your understanding, lil jueves In which case I will nominate COLIN KAEPERNICK for being a bad leader and wearing his hat backwards, which as we all know is a cardinal sin.
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May 5, 2014 15:11
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John Elway -highly punchable face -douchebag Republican -thought he was too good to play for the Colts -gets a raise for lucking into signing Peytong Manning despite the rest of the team being poo poo Also, Mr. Silver Spoon http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2014/02/02/john-elway-to-fox-news-im-republican-because-i-dont-believe-in-safety-nets/
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May 5, 2014 16:43
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Rap posted:Im using irony and jokes at a level well beyond your understanding, lil jueves Go sleep on a butt pillow >:[
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May 5, 2014 16:47
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sweet thursday posted:C'mon now, what's the alternative? Cheating on her? Apparently she cheated on him with Tate.
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May 5, 2014 16:53
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Nolan Nawrocki for his unique brand of "scouting" which is 40% terrible armchair psychoanalysis, 40% smokescreening, and 20% race-baiting.
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May 5, 2014 17:06
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I am working on getting the first standings update up, and I have a question for those more familiar with it: In the case of Ray Rice, is he an actual woman beater or are he and his wife that couple who can't stop fighting to the point where the cops get involved? Looking at the news (because I don't know better), if it is option two I'll allow it, otherwise I am sticking to the Roethlisberger rule.
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May 5, 2014 19:07
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Ben Has Tiny Weenus posted:I am working on getting the first standings update up, and I have a question for those more familiar with it: In the case of Ray Rice, is he an actual woman beater or are he and his wife that couple who can't stop fighting to the point where the cops get involved? Looking at the news (because I don't know better), if it is option two I'll allow it, otherwise I am sticking to the Roethlisberger rule. Here is a video of him dragging his fiance out of an elevator after he knocked her out.
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May 5, 2014 19:19
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Nominating Rob Gronkowski because he's a douche yet totally harmless at the same time. The perfect milquetoast option for those of you who don't want to vote for Ray Rice.
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May 5, 2014 19:37
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It should be noted that his wife totally started it. His wife probably did not start it.
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May 5, 2014 19:39
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My wife and I just couldn't stop arguing to the point that she fell down and got bruises
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May 5, 2014 19:41
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Detroit_Dogg posted:It should be noted that his wife totally started it. I've told her repeatedly that I don't like it when you eat off my plate. I won't be held responsible for what happens if you do.
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May 5, 2014 19:42
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I have decided that due to allowing domestic violence people into the tournament in the past as well as the fact that all signs point to him not receiving any jail time, I will allow Ray Rice into the tournament. That said, here are the current standings: Standings Players Ray Rice: 5 Richie Incognito: 2 Aldon Smith: 1 Jameis Winston: 3 AJ McCarron: 1 Taylor Lewan: 1 Arian Foster: 1 Russell Wilson: 2 Administrators Roger Goodell: 3 Mark Emmert: 3 Bret Bielma: 3 Greg Schiano: 1 Mike Tomlin: 1 Mike Shanahan: 1 Skip Bayless: 1 Nick Saban: 1 Media Colin Cowherd: 1 Merril Hoge: 2 Skip Bayless: 1 Pete Prisco: 1 Jamele Hill: 1 Nolan Nawrocki: 1 Wildcard 12th Man: 4 Tallahassee PD: 1 Outside Looking In (Will fill out wildcard bracket if spots are open) Bobby Petrino: 1 Jeff Ireland: 1 Jeff Fisher: 1 Tyler Bray: 1 Colin Kaepernick: 1 John Elway: 1 Rob Gronkowski: 1 Lifetime Noms Roger Goodell Skip Bayless Bobby Petrino Keep in mind that you can have as many nominations as you want.
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May 5, 2014 19:52
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Just to be safe, I will throw my support to both Greg Schiano and Mark Emmert. With Schiano, the way he just completely took a poo poo on the entire Tampa Bay organization and gave off the impression that they should be thankful for the magnificent dump he was giving them, as if he were doing it the right way and everyone else were the assholes, makes him a worthy candidate for the coveted Douche of the Year award. However, I find Mark Emmert even more despicable. At least Schiano is honest about his jag-assery. Mark Emmert actually had the audacity to say that if he were a college student, he would not accept any money, even if it were offered him. This asshat is cashing in fat checks from the NCAA while student-athletes struggle to keep themselves fed after working ridiculous hours for the benefit of the school. All so Mark Emmert can pontificate about the merits of a corrupt system that only benefits a select few of which he is a part of. In short, I hope he dies a horrible, screaming death of syphilis.
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May 5, 2014 20:00
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Second for Bret Bielema
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May 5, 2014 20:01
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Ben Has Tiny Weenus posted:I have decided that due to allowing domestic violence people into the tournament in the past as well as the fact that all signs point to him not receiving any jail time, I will allow Ray Rice into the tournament. I hope your mother has never been this disappointed in you 
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May 5, 2014 20:23
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Seconding Greg Schiano, as his incompetence in letting Michael Bennett walk and blowing a 21-0 lead contributed to the 12th Man enjoying a Super Bowl victory.
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May 5, 2014 20:34
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Rasczak posted:I hope your mother has never been this disappointed in you He more than likely gets in at this point. He can be top 8 in admins, fill out the wildcard, or if he is tied for a final spot, I might put him in if his writeup is better. At this point he just needs one more vote and he has a week to get it.
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May 5, 2014 20:38
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Can I amend my Elway nomination for a lifetime slot rather than the regular tourney? Also, Lane Kiffin for runining two prestigious football programs and falling into yet another cushy job.
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May 5, 2014 20:43
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Also seconding Hog Sooie Bielema
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May 5, 2014 21:27
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Colin Cowherd - For basically being Colin Cowherd. If you want something specific, take his race-baiting on John Wall. Phil Mushnick - For saying Donald Sterling was lynched, blaming AP for the death of his son, and everything he wrote about DeSean Jackson. If there's more of a racist pearl-clutcher than him, I'm not sure who it is. Bret Bielema - For reasons already mentioned. Mark Emmert - I have to sort of respect how far he is throwing himself behind his bullshit positions. The guy has to be a true believer.
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May 5, 2014 21:54
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