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Deadpool
Apr 28, 2002

"That's not fair. That's not fair at all. There was time now. There was all the time I needed! That's not fair!"



Hi, this is another thread for Upfronts. This time for ABC. So yeah.

2013-14 Scorecard

Returning Series
Castle
Grey's Anatomy
Scandal
Resurrection
Once Upon A Time
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.
Revenge
Nashville
Modern Family
The Middle
The Goldbergs
Last Man Standing

Cancelled Series
Lucky 7
Mind Games
Killer Women
The Assets
Betrayal
Once Upon A Time In Wonderland
Trophy Wife
The Neighbors
Mixology
Back In The Game
Suburgatory
Super Fun Night



2014-15 SCHEDULE (New programs in UPPER CASE; all times ET)

MONDAY
8 PM – Dancing With The Stars
10 PM – Castle

TUESDAY
8 PM – SELFIE
8:30 PM – MANHATTAN LOVE STORY
9 PM – Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.
10 PM – FOREVER

WEDNESDAY
8 PM – The Middle
8:30 PM – The Goldbergs
9 PM – Modern Family
9:30 PM – BLACK-ISH
10 PM – Nashville

THURSDAY
8 PM – Grey’s Anatomy
9 PM – Scandal
10 PM – HOW TO GET AWAY WITH MURDER

FRIDAY
8 PM – Last Man Standing
8:30 PM – CRISTELA
9 PM – Shark Tank
10 PM – 20/20

SATURDAY
8 PM – Saturday Night Football

SUNDAY
7 PM – America’s Funniest Home Videos
8 PM – Once Upon A Time
9 PM – Resurrection
10 PM – Revenge


New Series

Drama

FOREVER

quote:

Doctor Henry Morgan (Ioan Gruffudd), New York City’s star medical examiner, has a secret. He doesn’t just study the dead to solve criminal cases, he does it to solve the mystery that has eluded him for 200 years—the answer to his own inexplicable immortality. This long life has given Henry remarkable observation skills which impresses his new partner, Detective Jo Martinez (Alana De La Garza). Each week, a new case and their budding friendship will reveal layers of Henry’s long and colorful past. Only his best friend and confidant, Abe (Judd Hirsch) knows Henry’s secret. “Forever” stars Ioan Gruffudd as Henry, Alana De La Garza as Det. Jo Martinez, Barbara Eve Harris as Lt. Marcia Roark, Donnie Keshawarz as Detective Hanson, Joel David Moore as Lucas, and Judd Hirsch as Abe. “Forever” was written and executive-produced by Matt Miller (“Chuck,” “Las Vegas”). Dan Lin (“Sherlock Holmes,” “Gangster Squad”) and Jennifer Gwartz (“Veronica Mars,” “Cupid,” “Party Down”) are executive producers. “Forever” was directed by Brad Anderson and is produced by Warner Bros. Television.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TZwrvDfH0AQ

HOW TO GET AWAY WITH MURDER

quote:

The brilliant, charismatic and seductive Professor Annalise Keating (Viola Davis) gets entangled with four law students from her class, “How to Get Away with Murder.” Little do they know that they will have to apply what they learned to real life, in this masterful, sexy, suspense-driven legal thriller from Shonda Rhimes and Betsy Beers, executive producers of “Grey’s Anatomy” and “Scandal.” “How to Get Away with Murder” stars Viola Davis as Professor Annalise Keating, Billy Brown as Nate, Alfred Enoch as Wes, Jack Falahee as Conner, Katie Findlay as Rebecca, Aja Naomi King as Michaela, Matt McGorry as Asher, Karla Souza as Laurel, Charlie Weber as Frank and Liza Weil as Bonnie. Written by executive producer Peter Nowalk, “How to Get Away with Murder” is executive-produced by Shonda Rhimes and Betsy Beers, directed by Michael Offer, and produced by ABC Studios.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dbSl-SPyHtg

AMERICAN CRIME

quote:

All over the news are reports about a young couple in Modesto, California, who were attacked in their home. Matt Skokie, a war vet, was killed, and his wife, Lily, is unconscious, barely hanging on. Both sets of parents are at her bedside hoping for a miracle while four suspects are about to be arrested. The case sends shock waves into the community stirring up tensions across racial lines in this gritty drama—from the point of view of the victims. “American Crime” stars Felicity Huffman as Barb, Timothy Hutton as Russ, W. Earl Brown as Tom, Richard Cabral as Hector Tonz, Caitlin Gerard as Aubry, Benito Martinez as Alonzo Gutierrez, Penelope Ann Miller as Eve, Elvis Nolasco as Carter and Johnny Ortiz as Tony Gutierrez. “American Crime” was written, directed and produced by John Ridley (“12 Years A Slave”). Executive producers are John Ridley and Michael J. McDonald. “American Crime” is produced by ABC Studios.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0IT21Lzh8ug

MARVEL’S AGENT CARTER

quote:

Marvel’s Agent Carter,” starring “Captain America’s” Hayley Atwell, follows the story of Peggy Carter. It’s 1946, and peace has dealt Peggy Carter a serious blow as she finds herself marginalized when the men return home from fighting abroad. Working for the covert SSR (Strategic Scientific Reserve), Peggy must balance doing administrative work and going on secret missions for Howard Stark all while trying to navigate life as a single woman in America, in the wake of losing the love of her life – Steve Rogers. Inspired by the feature films “Captain America: The First Avenger” and “Captain America: The Winter Soldier,” along with the short “Marvel One-Shot: Agent Carter.” Starring Hayley Atwell as Agent Peggy Carter, “Marvel’s Agent Carter” was written by Christopher Markus and Stephen McFeely. Executive producers are Tara Butters, Michele Fazekas, Christopher Markus, Stephen McFeely, Chris Dingess, Kevin Feige, Louis D’Esposito, Alan Fine, Joe Quesada, Stan Lee and Jeph Loeb. “Marvel’s Agent Carter” is produced by ABC Studios and Marvel Television.

SECRETS AND LIES

quote:

Ben Garner (Ryan Phillippe) is about to go from Good Samaritan to murder suspect, after he discovers the body of his neighbor’s young son in the woods. As Detective Andrea Cornell (Juliette Lewis) digs for the truth, the secrets and lies of this town come to the surface and no one is above suspicion. Ben’s family’s life will be turned upside down as he sets out on a complicated journey to prove his innocence in this thriller mystery from Barbie Kligman (“Private Practice”) based on the original Australian series of the same name. “Secrets and Lies” stars Ryan Phillippe as Ben, KaDee Strickland as Christy, Natalie Martinez as Jess, Clifton Collins, Jr. as Dave, Indiana Evans as Natalie, Belle Shouse as Abby and Juliette Lewis as Detective Cornell. “Secrets and Lies” was written by Barbie Kligman. Executive producers are Barbie Kligman, Aaron Kaplan, Tracey Robertson and Nathan Mayfield. “Secrets and Lies” was directed by Charles McDougall, executive-produced by Kapital Entertainment with Hoodlum Entertainment and produced by ABC Studios.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rqkkphZGrx0

THE WHISPERS

quote:

Aliens have invaded Earth by using our most unlikely resource to achieve world domination—our children. As the kids unwittingly help these unseen enemies, the clock counts down in this suspenseful race to save humanity. “The Whispers” stars Lily Rabe as Claire Bennigan, Barry Sloane as Wes Lawrence, Milo Ventimiglia as John Doe/Drew Bennigan, Derek Webster as Jessup Rollins, Brianna Brown as Lena Lawrence, Catalina Denis as Dr. Maria Benavidez, Kylie Rogers as Minx Lawrence and Kyle Harrison Breitkopf as Henry. “The Whispers” was written and co-executive-produced by Soo Hugh, with Amblin TV co-producing. Executive producers are Steven Spielberg, Justin Falvey, Darryl Frank and Dawn Olmstead. “The Whispers” was directed by Mark Romanek and produced by ABC Studios.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_yj1Y4XPhyE



Comedy

BLACK-ISH

quote:

Andre ‘Dre’ Johnson (Anthony Anderson) has a great job, a beautiful wife, Rainbow (Tracee Ellis Ross), four kids, and a colonial home in the ‘burbs. But has success brought too much assimilation for this black family? With a little help from his dad (Laurence Fishburne), Dre sets out to establish a sense of cultural identity for his family that honors their past while embracing the future. “Black-ish” stars Anthony Anderson as Dre, Tracee Ellis Ross as Rainbow, Yara Shahidi as Zoey, Marcus Scribner as Andre Jr., Miles Brown as Jack, Marsai Martin as Diane and Laurence Fishburne as Pops. “Black-ish” was written by Kenya Barris, who also serves as executive producer. Executive producers are Larry Wilmore, Anthony Anderson, Laurence Fishburne, Helen Sugland, Tom Russo, Brian Dobbins, Peter Principato, Paul Young and James Griffiths, who directed the pilot. “Black-ish” is produced by ABC Studios.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JNqqjDv6_dU

CRISTELA

quote:

In her sixth year of law school, Cristela (Cristela Alonzo) is finally on the brink of landing her first big (unpaid) internship at a prestigious law firm. The only problem is that her pursuit of success is more ambitious than her traditional Mexican-American family thinks is appropriate. She’s stuck straddling the old culture she’s trying to modernize at home with her working-class family and the modern world she’s trying to embrace in her professional career. Breakout comedian Cristela Alonzo stars in this hilarious comedy about laughing your way down the path to the new American dream. “Cristela” stars Cristela Alonzo as Cristela, Carlos Ponce as Felix, Terri Hoyos as Natalia, Andrew Leeds as Josh and Sam McMurray as Trent. “Cristela” was written by Cristela Alonzo and Kevin Hench. Executive producers are Kevin Hench, Marty Adelstein, Becky Clements and Shawn Levy. “Cristela” is produced by 20th Century Fox Television.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gX1GBEJ-2aQ

MANHATTAN LOVE STORY

quote:

Have you ever wondered what your date was thinking? This romantic comedy exposes the differences between men and women through the unfiltered thoughts, and often contradictory actions, of a new couple who have just begun dating. “Manhattan Love Story” stars Analeigh Tipton as Dana, Jake McDorman as Peter, Nicolas Wright as David, Jade Catta-Preta as Amy, Chloe Wepper as Chloe and Kurt Fuller as William. “Manhattan Love Story” was written by Jeff Lowell (“Drew Carey Show,” “Spin City”). Peter Traugott, Jeff Lowell, Robin Schwartz, Rachel Kaplan and Jon Liebman are executive producers. Michael Fresco directed the pilot. “Manhattan Love Story” is produced by ABC Studios.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=21llS2xvRTM

SELFIE

quote:

“Instafamous” Eliza Dooley (Karen Gillan) has 263,000 followers who hang on to her every post, tweet and selfie. But one lonely day, she has a revelation: being friended is not the same as having actual friends. She asks marketing guru Henry (John Cho) to ‘rebrand’ her self-obsessed reputation and teach her how to connect with people in the real world. Loosely based on “My Fair Lady,” “Selfie” explores the modern struggles of Eliza and Henry, as he tries to teach her how to live life offline—whether she ‘likes’ it or not. “Selfie” stars Karen Gillan as Eliza, John Cho as Henry, Tim Peper as Ethan, Da’Vine Joy Randolph as Charmonique, Allyn Rachel as Bryn and David Harewood as Sam. “Selfie” was written by Emily Kapnek and directed by Julie Anne Robinson, who also serve as executive producers. “Selfie” is produced by Piece of Pie Productions in association with Warner Bros. Television.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5-9qDF36I4

FRESH OFF THE BOAT

quote:

It’s the 90s and 11 year old, hip-hop loving Eddie (Hudson Yang) just moved to suburban Orlando from DC’s Chinatown with his parents (Randall Park and Constance Wu). It’s culture shock for his immigrant family in this comedy about pursuing the American Dream. “Fresh Off the Boat” is based on Chef Eddie Huang’s memoir Fresh Off the Boat. “Fresh Off the Boat” stars Randall Park as Louis, Constance Wu as Jessica, Hudson Yang as Eddie, Forrest Wheeler as Emery and Ian Chen as Evan. “Fresh Off the Boat” was written by Nahnatchka Khan, who also serves as executive producer. Jake Kasdan and Melvin Mar are executive producers, and Eddie Huang is producer. The series is produced by 20th Century Fox Television.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mOutgc-GG6g

GALAVANT

quote:

Screenwriter/executive producer Dan Fogelman (“Crazy, Stupid, Love,” “Tangled,” “Cars”) teams up with Broadway and Hollywood award-winning musical team—composer Alan Menken (“The Little Mermaid,” “Aladdin,” “Beauty and the Beast”) and lyricist Glenn Slater (“The Little Mermaid,” “Tangled”)—for a musical comedy fairytale of epic proportions. Once upon a time, the dashing hero, Galavant (Joshua Sasse), lost the love of his life, Madalena (Mallory Jansen), to the evil King Richard (Timothy Omundson). Now, our fallen hero is ready to take revenge and restore his “happily ever after.” But it won’t be without a few twists and turns along the way. “Galavant” stars Joshua Sasse as Galavant, Timothy Omundson as King Richard, Vinnie Jones as Gareth, Mallory Jansen as Madalena, Karen David as Isabella and Luke Youngblood as Sid. “Galavant” was written by Dan Fogelman, who also serves as executive producer. Executive producers are Alan Menken, Glenn Slater and Chris Koch. “Galavant” was directed by Chris Koch. Abbey C Studios Ltd. produces “Galavant” for ABC Studios.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hPNVhGbw_Sg

Deadpool fucked around with this message at May 13, 2014 around 21:05

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Party Plane Jones
Jul 1, 2007

Flying the friendly skies in relative safet-oh god the engine fell off


Forever sounds like another New Amsterdam and will probably get cancelled just as quickly.

Yoshifan823
Feb 19, 2007

I'm very poor. Having a checking account would be an honor. I've written a zombie book. It's terrible. I'm a slow runner. I'm obsessed with karate.


I love that ABC has seemingly heard the complaints about not enough diversity in sitcoms and just said "Well alright, here's our Black Show, here's our Mexican Show, and here's our Asian Show."

Barry Convex
Sep 1, 2005

Think of the good things, Pim! The good things!

Like Jesus, candy, and crackerjacks! Ice cream and cake and lots o'laffs!
Grandma, Grandpa, and Uncle Joe! Larry, Curly, and brother Moe!


Yoshifan823 posted:

I love that ABC has seemingly heard the complaints about not enough diversity in sitcoms and just said "Well alright, here's our Black Show, here's our Mexican Show, and here's our Asian Show."

Last Man Standing skews pretty conservative, I'd think, so putting Cristela after it does not seem to be the most logical choice.

Xealot
Nov 25, 2002

Showdown in the Galaxy Era.



Party Plane Jones posted:

Forever sounds like another New Amsterdam and will probably get cancelled just as quickly.

That show was so great. Jaime Lannister as an immortal detective. I'll probably watch this show and hate it for not being New Amsterdam.

muscles like this?
Jan 17, 2005

BOGGLE?



Yoshifan823 posted:

I love that ABC has seemingly heard the complaints about not enough diversity in sitcoms and just said "Well alright, here's our Black Show, here's our Mexican Show, and here's our Asian Show."

Yet another entry into the "90s period piece" genre.

Party Plane Jones posted:

Forever sounds like another New Amsterdam and will probably get cancelled just as quickly.

Ha, that's exactly what I was thinking reading that description.

Also, am I crazy or does that description of "How To Get Away With Murder" not actually explain anything about the premise?

zoux
Apr 28, 2006



How does one pronounce Ioan?

Deadpool
Apr 28, 2002

"That's not fair. That's not fair at all. There was time now. There was all the time I needed! That's not fair!"



zoux posted:

How does one pronounce Ioan?

Yo-wan. Don't judge him by his Fantastic Four role either, he's a pretty drat good actor. Though I get the feeling Immortal Sherlock Holmes won't give him much to show off either.

Deadpool fucked around with this message at May 13, 2014 around 19:30

Postal Parcel
Aug 2, 2013


Black-ish, Cristela, and FOB(Fresh off the Boat)
ABC is certainly going for most diverse this year

Also:

quote:

Da’Vine Joy Randolph as Charmonique
I bet I know what she's going to sound like

Pattycakes
May 12, 2014


Party Plane Jones posted:

Forever sounds like another New Amsterdam and will probably get cancelled just as quickly.

Isn't that ABC's toughest time slot historically? I doubt this show will last in that slot.

Deadpool
Apr 28, 2002

"That's not fair. That's not fair at all. There was time now. There was all the time I needed! That's not fair!"



Added trailers for everything except Agent Carter which I'm pretty sure hasn't even had a pilot shot yet. Just the DVD short from last year.

Irish Joe
Jul 23, 2007

Come on Abed, let's spoon in the Gluon Chamber.

My God, Karen Gillian in a Emily Kapnek sitcom doing the world's worst American accent. John Cho as the romantic lead? Sassy black secretary?

Gonna to ride that beautiful trainwreck all the way into station.

Barry Convex
Sep 1, 2005

Think of the good things, Pim! The good things!

Like Jesus, candy, and crackerjacks! Ice cream and cake and lots o'laffs!
Grandma, Grandpa, and Uncle Joe! Larry, Curly, and brother Moe!


Deadpool posted:

Added trailers for everything except Agent Carter which I'm pretty sure hasn't even had a pilot shot yet. Just the DVD short from last year.

Yeah, the One Shot substituted for a more conventional pilot as far as ABC's greenlighting process was concerned. That's why there's no casting announced yet besides Atwell.

muscles like this?
Jan 17, 2005

BOGGLE?



Barry Convex posted:

Yeah, the One Shot substituted for a more conventional pilot as far as ABC's greenlighting process was concerned. That's why there's no casting announced yet besides Atwell.

Hopefully we get Neal McDonough back as Dum Dum.

Gaunab
Feb 13, 2012


Yoshifan823 posted:

I love that ABC has seemingly heard the complaints about not enough diversity in sitcoms and just said "Well alright, here's our Black Show, here's our Mexican Show, and here's our Asian Show."

Haven't seen the trailer for Cristela but if it's anything like the other two then uh-oh. These shows seem just offensive and I can't put my finger on exactly why.

Yoshifan823
Feb 19, 2007

I'm very poor. Having a checking account would be an honor. I've written a zombie book. It's terrible. I'm a slow runner. I'm obsessed with karate.


Irish Joe posted:

My God, Karen Gillian in a Emily Kapnek sitcom doing the world's worst American accent. John Cho as the romantic lead? Sassy black secretary?

Gonna to ride that beautiful trainwreck all the way into station.

Complaining about her American accent is like complaining about Aubrey Hepburn's British accent in the original My Fair Lady. I will say, it just feels like an Emily Kapnek show, which will be nice to have now that Suburgatory is gone (RIP).

Also, Cristela looks like it will be a perfect partner for Last Man Standing.

edit: Galivant looks ridiculous in the best way.

Yoshifan823 fucked around with this message at May 13, 2014 around 23:58

Gaz-L
Jan 28, 2009


muscles like this? posted:

Hopefully we get Neal McDonough back as Dum Dum.

Honestly, most the Howling Commandos were journeyman character actors, so you could probably get most of them if they wanted. And Dominic Cooper doesn't seem to be doing all that much lately. You could also easily use Sebastian Stan as a link between past and present if you want a big 'from the movies' superhero cameo, as the Winter Soldier was explicitly cryogenically frozen between missions.

404GoonNotFound
Aug 6, 2006

The McRib is back!?!?


Oh good god, I will follow Galivant into the very depths of hell.

Astroman
Apr 8, 2001


Deadpool posted:

Yo-wan. Don't judge him by his Fantastic Four role either, he's a pretty drat good actor. Though I get the feeling Immortal Sherlock Holmes won't give him much to show off either.

I've loved him since Hornblower, but yeah I just get those New Amsterdam vibes...which means yes I'll watch it and yes I'll when it's quickly cancelled.

Whispers could be good, smacks of being a YA thing but it could be another The 100 so I'll bite. Those Ethnic Comedies though

And I hate every single word of this:

quote:

“Instafamous” Eliza Dooley (Karen Gillan) has 263,000 followers who hang on to her every post, tweet and selfie. But one lonely day, she has a revelation: being friended is not the same as having actual friends. She asks marketing guru Henry (John Cho) to ‘rebrand’ her

It's like everything I hate about the modern world but...John Cho and Karen Gillan. It's like they made a show that was bound to rub me the wrong way and then put 2 actors I love in it. Curse you ABC! (Yeah I'll probably watch it).

Agent Carter looks good too. I'm not a huge Marvelversehead but I did like her story in Captain America and a period piece would be cool.

So far it would seem ABC has the most shows I'm interested in this year.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009
Ask me about my cats, Leo & CJ, because they are AWESOME!

American Crime looks like Crash: The TV Series, but there looks to be some legit acting going on.

I'm on board for The Whispers. I just hope the alien plot is scripted well and we don't get another The Event.

Black-ish might go the way of Cavemen and GCB.

Cristella is literally an SNL sketch.

Karen Gillan is taller than John Cho. We are truly in a post-height world.

Fresh Off The Boat would get cancelled after 2 episodes if it was about any other minority than Asians. Instead it simply won't get picked up for the back 9. You had to option a chef's memoir for this poo poo?

"Comedy. Musical. Fairytale. What's not to love? Get a first look at #Galavant, coming soon to ABC!"
"He can solve any mystery... except his own."

Are you loving kidding me?!

Oh, and this

Blackish posted:

Andre ‘Dre’ Johnson (Anthony Anderson) has a great job
Would you ever say "Katherine 'Katie' Miller has a great job"?

Josh Lyman fucked around with this message at May 14, 2014 around 04:19

Astroman
Apr 8, 2001


Josh Lyman posted:

"He can solve any mystery... except his own."

Are you loving kidding me?!

Wait, now I have stupid spergy questions.

Like...where does his body go if he wakes up naked in the river? Like is there still body in the train car and on top of that cab? Can he go like...get his clothes and car keys off it? Are there hundreds of bodies like in that certain film about magic that I won't spoil by saying the title but you know the one if you've seen it? Or does his body vanish like Obi-Wan Kenobi, leaving his empty clothes behind?

These are the stupid questions they probably won't answer that make me unable to enjoy shows like this...

Whiteycar
May 13, 2003


Blocked in Canada, thanks ABC!

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009
Ask me about my cats, Leo & CJ, because they are AWESOME!

muscles like this? posted:

Also, am I crazy or does that description of "How To Get Away With Murder" not actually explain anything about the premise?
It's a "masterful, sexy, suspense-driven legal thriller from Shonda Rhimes". They don't need to explain anything as women will flock to it regardless.

Postal Parcel
Aug 2, 2013


Okay, so I watched the trailer for F.O.B.
Isn't the father Danny Chung from Veep? Why is he putting on "that" accent for this if he can easily speak in a real American accent?

e2: Cristela is literally George Lopez where Lopez is female.

And oh god, Black-ish. Holy poo poo this feels so weird to watch. Literally all about what is and isn't 'black'.

Postal Parcel fucked around with this message at May 14, 2014 around 04:32

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009
Ask me about my cats, Leo & CJ, because they are AWESOME!

Postal Parcel posted:

Okay, so I watched the trailer for F.O.B.
Isn't the father Danny Chung from Veep? Why is he putting on "that" accent for this if he can easily speak in a real American accent?
Because he's an immigrant, and immigrant talku reau hirarious.

lelandjs
Feb 18, 2011

This is that goon shit
Fuck up your whole
afternoon shit


Wow... all of those shows are varying degrees of awful. The only one that's likely to be worth the time invested is Selfie, and that's just because of Karen Gillia--oh she's faking an American accent nevermind.

Almost every one of these shows (with the exception of Selfie, which is obnoxiously current) feels like it belongs a decade or two ago. Especially Galahant, which looks like it would have been a great lead in to Hercules or Xena. GodDAMN, ABC.

courtney_beth
Jul 23, 2007

I SHALL NOT USE MY
HOOVES AS HANDS


I think I'd like "Selfie" if it was named something different... the word makes me cringe. It took about half-way through the trailer to see the show as what it could be.

Everything else looks weak. Good to see I'll have lots of other viewing options on different channels to watch!

Propaganda Machine
Jan 2, 2005

Truthiness!

Black-ish looks bad. Like, unspeakably bad. See, guys, this is what we get for thinking LMS is awful; they just throw us something even worse, out of spite.

Seriously, how did they get Lawrence Fishbourne to do this

Damiya
Jul 3, 2012


there's no way that comedy lineup ends up being anything but patently offensive based on the blurbs alone.

good lord

Deadpool
Apr 28, 2002

"That's not fair. That's not fair at all. There was time now. There was all the time I needed! That's not fair!"



Propaganda Machine posted:

Black-ish looks bad. Like, unspeakably bad. See, guys, this is what we get for thinking LMS is awful; they just throw us something even worse, out of spite.

Seriously, how did they get Lawrence Fishbourne to do this

He's a producer, so it's more like he got them to do it. But yeah, all of those comedies look terrible. I think Selfie looks the work of all of them actually. There's literally not one thing about that trailer I liked.

Deadpool fucked around with this message at May 14, 2014 around 07:13

EL BROMANCE
Jun 10, 2006

BETTER THE DEVIL YOU KNOW


lelandjs posted:

Wow... all of those shows are varying degrees of awful.

Yeah it's a good thing they didn't cancel any enjoyable shows to make way for them.

Except Trophy Wife, The Neighbours, Suburgatory, Back in the Game. Even 'Super Fun Night' could've been salvaged, it had its moments but just needed a between season sort out. I don't mind stuff getting cancelled to give things a shot, but not if those things are looking to get the boot after a few episodes themselves.

We lost the amazingness of Toks on our screen for these? Really?

Vegetable
Oct 22, 2010


Postal Parcel posted:

Okay, so I watched the trailer for F.O.B.
Isn't the father Danny Chung from Veep? Why is he putting on "that" accent for this if he can easily speak in a real American accent?
Real American accent, nice

My friend's parents are first-generation Americans who have been in the U.S. for decades and they talk exactly like that family. You don't have to talk like a white person to be American, and this show looks to be great for underlining just that.

Yoshifan823
Feb 19, 2007

I'm very poor. Having a checking account would be an honor. I've written a zombie book. It's terrible. I'm a slow runner. I'm obsessed with karate.


Selfie looks awesome because it's a modern day My Fair Lady with John Cho, made by the woman who gave us As Told By Ginger and Suburgatory. And Karen Gillan, while not the greatest accent worker in the world, is supposed to sound awful, because then Henry Higgins is gonna teach her how to not talk like a dummy. It is the story.

I also get the feeling that Black-ish and Fresh Off The Boat might just be funnier to people who are black/asian, because it speaks to them. There were moments I found funny, but it seems like ABC is really trying to attract non-white people, and this is their attempt. Cristela, on the other hand, looks godawful no matter how you slice it. They're trying to restart the "stand-up gets a family sitcom" trend that did them well for years, but I think they picked the wrong comic. Seriously, we've got Louie and Mulaney already, give me Funches, give me Kate 'n' Riki, give me... uh... Hannibal?

Irish Joe
Jul 23, 2007

Come on Abed, let's spoon in the Gluon Chamber.

Vegetable posted:

My friend's parents are first-generation Americans who have been in the U.S. for decades and they talk exactly like that family. You don't have to talk like a white person to be American, and this show looks to be great for underlining just that.


No one cares about your parents or their ridiculous foreign accent.

Postal Parcel
Aug 2, 2013


Vegetable posted:

Real American accent, nice

My friend's parents are first-generation Americans who have been in the U.S. for decades and they talk exactly like that family. You don't have to talk like a white person to be American, and this show looks to be great for underlining just that.

That's not what I'm talking about. Anthony Anderson has an American accent.(Of course, that might be why he's black-ish )
What I mean is that his words clearly have a madeup accent to them that he either hides in Veep or he made for the character.

Secondly, I said nothing about him being American or not. He sounds like a stereotype here while on Veep he sounds nothing like this.

BIG CITY LAWYER
Sep 15, 2004
This is not my beautiful wife!

Randall Park was born and raised in the US, so his way of speaking here is a character decision based on the fact that the character he is playing was neither born nor raised in the US. A character based on an actual person at that. Whether that makes it better or worse I'll leave up to you.

sbaldrick
Jul 19, 2006
Driven by Hate


For those in Canada, here's a link so see some of the awful shows

*edit*

with a link to all the horrible shows

http://www.youtube.com/user/netpromos/videos

I will watch forever because I like the lead in it.

sbaldrick fucked around with this message at May 14, 2014 around 15:11

sportsgenius86
Jun 17, 2008

THE STREAK IS OVER


Selfie actually sounds like it could work but I doubt it ever gets past that lovely title. Also, if the execution is right, Black-ish could actually be decent to good but it won't be right, so whatever.

I'm not as down on ABC's lot as everyone else seems to be.

Harlock
Jan 15, 2006

Tap "A" to drink!!!



Who watches Last Man Standing still?

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Propaganda Machine
Jan 2, 2005

Truthiness!

Harlock posted:

Who watches Last Man Standing still?

E PLURIBUS ANUS neé Occupation

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