There are roughly 47 different dialects in China, but the one that binds them all together is the car horn. Drivers honk when they approach another car. Drivers honk when they have passed another car. Drivers honk when they think of another car, or when they don't think of another car. The purpose of a car horn is to let the world know that you do, in fact, possess a car horn and it is fully functional. Rumor has it you can serve a lengthy prison sentence if you fail to blow your horn for 18 consecutive seconds.

Y-Hat posted:

How many people do you see making GBS threads on the street on an average day?

quote:

You see, when a Chinese resident buys something, they don't simply ask how much it costs and then exchange their currency for a product. That backwards poo poo is for idiots. No, they must abide by the time-honored tradition of negotiation, which always, and I repeat ALWAYS, follows this explicit process:

1) Buyer asks how much the product is. Seller tells them.

2) Buyer responds by acting aghast, claiming there's no way this thing could cost this much. It's an insult to both them and humanity in general.

3) Seller offers a SLIGHTLY lower price.

4) Buyer acts as if the product is the absolutely most disgusting and revolting item in the history of the universe, and they'd rather die than purchase it. Buyer walks away and pretends to examine other items, or they completely leave the store for a period of time.

5) Buyer eventually returns and offers an even lower price for the product. Seller acts furious, as though it would be sacrilege to sell their item for such an obscene price, and selling it so low would force them into bankruptcy. They eventually regain their composure and counter with a moderately higher price.

6) Buyer pauses and spends several hours carefully examining the object, pointing out any imperfections, real or imaginary, in an attempt to negotiate an even lower price. Seller reassures customer that the product has a lifetime guarantee, which is code for "guarantee that ends the moment you purchase it."

7) Buyer and seller scream at each other for several more hours. You can determine who is winning by noting who screams the loudest or in the deepest voice.

8) A compromised price is eventually reached and the item is purchased. It is now half a week later, and several of the buyer's family members have died of old age.

effectual posted:

It's mostly just kids, mostly.


I liked the callout of the half-finished abandoned construction, that has got to be the dumbest thing about China.

Pawn 17 posted:

I've been to several countries where this is done on purpose and is very common place. "Half finished" (but functional) buildings are considered under construction and the owners don't have to pay taxes on them or some such thing.