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What team will prevail?
Team Kurd
Team Terrorist
Team Iraq
Team Obama
Team Putin
Team Goku
Team This Thread Sucks
View Results
 
  • Locked thread
Sophy Wackles
Dec 17, 2000

> access main security grid
access: PERMISSION DENIED.





This new version is going through final approval and will be released soon.

Forces in this version:

Team 1
  • The Kurds

Team 2
  • ISIS/ISIL
  • Syrian "rebels" armed by the US
  • Ragtag Sunni insurgents
  • Al Qaeda

Team 3
  • Iraqi government
  • The Iranian Revolutionary Guard
  • Hezbollah
  • Iraq Shiite militia

Team 4
  • 'Merica (gently caress YEA!)
  • The Western Allies

Team 5
  • Putin

Team 6
  • Goku and the DBZ gang

Hopefully I didn't miss any features in this version, but feel free to let me know what to add or correct.

Any predictions? Will Goku save the Earth once again?

Sophy Wackles fucked around with this message at 03:35 on Jun 14, 2014

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Accretionist
Nov 7, 2012
I BELIEVE IN STUPID CONSPIRACY THEORIES
It'd be pretty hilarious if we were just like, "gently caress it," and helped Iraq to become friends with Iran and this poo poo helped kick off a kind of regional security pact.

Devils Affricate
Jan 22, 2010
Is team 1 going to do anything other than get murdered a lot this time?

OwlBot 2000
Jun 1, 2009

Devils Affricate posted:

Is team 1 going to do anything other than get murdered a lot this time?

Kurds are the best

source: I'm Kurdish :smuggo:

DarkCrawler
Apr 6, 2009

by vyelkin
Iraq is such a clusterfuck that it's the only conflict in the entire Middle East where Kurds are for once the most likely winners

Deadbeat Poetry
Mar 6, 2004

Sorry if my costume scared you
An unstoppable Putin/Goku alliance will emerge and take all the oil.

Fishy Joe
Apr 19, 2005
Eat at Fishy Joe's
I would prefer no new oil wars please

Thanks

Sheng-Ji Yang
Mar 5, 2014


Accretionist posted:

It'd be pretty hilarious if we were just like, "gently caress it," and helped Iraq to become friends with Iran and this poo poo helped kick off a kind of regional security pact.

we should ally with iran and help them nuke israel imho

Accretionist
Nov 7, 2012
I BELIEVE IN STUPID CONSPIRACY THEORIES

Sheng-ji Yang posted:

we should ally with iran and help them nuke israel imho

dti, insha'allah

Dog Fat Man Chaser
Jan 13, 2009

maybe being miserable
is not unpredictable
maybe that's
the problem
with me
no, i am not

Sono
Apr 9, 2008




Is Turkey going to pretend to be a part of Team 4 this time?

Dog Fat Man Chaser
Jan 13, 2009

maybe being miserable
is not unpredictable
maybe that's
the problem
with me
Is there a form I need to fill out?

newreply.php
Dec 24, 2009

Pillbug
i wish people in the middle east could just all get along and give us their gas

GreaseGunner
Dec 26, 2012

Just chillin'
Kurdistan is a pretty legit place, they have a two story Church's Chicken, except they call it Texas Chicken. They get Americans up there, yup.

Digi_Kraken
Sep 4, 2011

The Brown Menace
Dec 24, 2010

Now comes in all colors.


newreply.php posted:

i wish people in the middle east could just all get along and give us their gas

specifically they should give it to this thread

Archer666
Dec 27, 2008
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bdO_qG5gvlA

The Protagonist
Jun 29, 2009

The average is 5.5? I thought it was 4. This is very unsettling.
i say chop up iraq, syria, some of jordon and turkey into sunnistan, shiastan and kurdistan


it's only fair

Justin Tyme
Feb 22, 2011


the kurds should use the chaos as an opportunity to spring for their own country this time, it's now or never

Biplane
Jul 18, 2005

The Brown Menace posted:

specifically they should give it to this thread

wed be rich

Sheng-Ji Yang
Mar 5, 2014


Justin Tyme posted:

the kurds should use the chaos as an opportunity to spring for their own country this time, it's now or never

turkey would just invade and own the gently caress out of them and wed have to back them cus nato. sucks to be a kurd!

GreaseGunner
Dec 26, 2012

Just chillin'

Sheng-ji Yang posted:

turkey would just invade and own the gently caress out of them and wed have to back them cus nato. sucks to be a kurd!

That would be TOTALLY SICK! I really enjoyed Erbil, it's a nice place. We also have super secret base hidden up there with a divisions worth of armored vehicles. But don't tell anyone about it.

Yaos
Feb 22, 2003

She is a cat of significant gravy.
Bush invaded Iraq to destabilize the middle east. He did a great job.

Sheng-Ji Yang
Mar 5, 2014


GreaseGunner posted:

That would be TOTALLY SICK! I really enjoyed Erbil, it's a nice place. We also have super secret base hidden up there with a divisions worth of armored vehicles. But don't tell anyone about it.

fuckin opsec dude wth

Other Barry
Jun 5, 2012


Dinosaur Gum
lana

Other Barry
Jun 5, 2012


Dinosaur Gum

LANA!



it's still funny that there are actual terrorists called ISIS

Nelson Mandingo
Mar 27, 2005




TEAM TERRORIST ALL THE WAY! ALLAHU AKBAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

VibrioCholera
Mar 7, 2003
We should just have another big war but this time with kickball captains. We'll let Switzerland and Sweden be captains since they sat out the last game. I know America and Russia get picked first but after that it's a real crap shoot to see who drafts the next Tom Brady.

FedEx Mercury
Jan 7, 2004

Me bad posting? That's unpossible!
Lipstick Apathy
as long as they're busy killing each they're not messing with israel so im cool with whatever

Sheng-Ji Yang
Mar 5, 2014


notZaar posted:

as long as they're busy killing each they're not messing with israel so im cool with whatever

its a shame a united arab world wiping out israel would rule.

rip nasser

Justin Tyme
Feb 22, 2011


notZaar posted:

as long as they're busy killing each they're not messing with israel so im cool with whatever

im not cool with anything that doesn't involve the death of all israelis marg bar israel

FedEx Mercury
Jan 7, 2004

Me bad posting? That's unpossible!
Lipstick Apathy

Sheng-ji Yang posted:

its a shame a united arab world wiping out israel would rule.

rip nasser

why would it rule? they would just be taking out the only decent and productive country in the region. good luck getting any cool apps or computers out of iraq.

Sheng-Ji Yang
Mar 5, 2014


notZaar posted:

why would it rule? they would just be taking out the only decent and productive country in the region. good luck getting any cool apps or computers out of iraq.

america would be much better off with iranian oil and a middle east that doesnt hate us than knockoff phone apps cloned from silicon valley. sorry your jew counrty is worthless to us, its only an ally because evangelical christians are delusional and think liberating the holy land will bring about the end times

Accretionist
Nov 7, 2012
I BELIEVE IN STUPID CONSPIRACY THEORIES

Sheng-ji Yang posted:

america would be much better off with iranian oil and a middle east that doesnt hate us than knockoff phone apps cloned from silicon valley. sorry your jew counrty is worthless to us, its only an ally because evangelical christians are delusional and think liberating the holy land will bring about the end times

I was talking to an Israeli the other day and he thought it was creepy that one of my local evangelical station runs ads for an American charity that feeds children in Israel what with conditions in the US degrading.

happyhippy
Feb 21, 2005

Playing games, watching movies, owning goons. 'sup
Pillbug
HAHAHAHA you include 'Western Allies'.
Don't think so Mister, the only fuckers going in to clean up this mess is the US only as you caused it.
Can't see the UK or any of the rest willing to help.

Remmeber when the Republicans said it would be over in a few months.
Friedman unit I think it was called.

FedEx Mercury
Jan 7, 2004

Me bad posting? That's unpossible!
Lipstick Apathy
the us hosed its relations with iran in the 70s which was long before they started giving a poo poo about israel

jhorphear
Apr 24, 2013

Ask me about telling people not to change my avatar

Sheng-ji Yang posted:

america would be much better off with iranian oil and a middle east that doesnt hate us than knockoff phone apps cloned from silicon valley. sorry your jew counrty is worthless to us, its only an ally because evangelical christians are delusional and think liberating the holy land will bring about the end times

Pretty much this. The middle east was pretty much a chill place until after WW2.

Biplane
Jul 18, 2005

the thought of the thousands of american soldiers who died for nothing in iraq fills me with unbridled joy

Stairmaster
Jun 8, 2012

op its called the z-warriors

hth

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Stairmaster
Jun 8, 2012

okay its not actually called the zwarriors nobody knows where that came from

  • Locked thread