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Haverchuck
May 6, 2005

the coolest
I'm making jerk pork chops on the grill with okra and squash

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Burt Sexual
Jan 26, 2006

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Switchblade Switcharoo

Decrepus posted:

My mom used to do this with pies and poo poo. She couldn't cook so she would buy the premade crust and buy the cans of pie filling and poo poo and end up with a pie that cost $15. Just loving buy a pie.

u should appreciate the effort your mom made for you ingrate

Haverchuck
May 6, 2005

the coolest

Darth123123 posted:

u should appreciate the effort your mom made for you ingrate

yeah even if it's all storebought ingredients theres still something to be said for it being hot+fresh out of the oven

Hustle Hound
Oct 21, 2012

all is known

Decrepus posted:

My mom used to do this with pies and poo poo. She couldn't cook so she would buy the premade crust and buy the cans of pie filling and poo poo and end up with a pie that cost $15. Just loving buy a pie.

how is it hard to assemble ingredients and bake a real pie, it's mixing and waiting

c0ldfuse
Jun 18, 2004

The pursuit of excellence.
I don't venture into GWS, but the forums IRC channel is legit good for getting answers to odd food questions.

Prokhor Zakharov
Dec 31, 2008

This is me as I make another great post


Good luck with your depression!
You put BEANS in CHILI!?

There outta be concentration camps for people like you!!

Three Olives
Apr 10, 2005

What if Hitler invented the BMW i3 Subcompact Electric car?
It sounds crazy, I know, but these carrot hot dogs taste a lot like the real thing! With all the gross things in real hot dogs, such as bones, bugs, and pig anuses, these carrot dogs are a healthy and cruelty-free option. With simple ingredients and an easy-to-follow recipe, you’ll be chomping away on the best vegan hot dogs ever in no time. The idea might sound wacky, but you’ve got to try them—trust us on this one!

Carrot Hot Dogs

4 whole carrots, cut into bun-length pieces with ends removed
1/4 cup apple cider vinegar
1/4 cup water
2 Tbsp. soy sauce
1/4 tsp. garlic powder (or 1/2 clove garlic, minced)
Dash liquid smoke
Pepper, to taste
4 vegan hot dog buns
Desired hot dog toppings (BBQ sauce, ketchup, mustard, relish, etc.)

Fill a large pot halfway with water and bring to boil.

Lower the heat to medium and cook the carrots until you can barely pierce through them with a fork. Be careful not to cut the carrots when testing!

Combine all the other ingredients together in a plastic container or baggie to make the marinade. Place the cooked carrots inside, shake up, and set aside to marinate for at least 3 hours. You can marinate for up to a few days—we marinated ours for about 4 hours, and they turned out very flavorful.

When you’re ready to serve, pour the carrots and marinade into a large pan on the stovetop or grill on medium heat, rotating periodically, for 5 to 10 minutes, until carrots are heated all the way through.

Place on a hot dog bun, add the toppings of your choice, and enjoy!

Neptr
Mar 1, 2011
Deconstructed fruit roll up pizza

a.lo
Sep 12, 2009

I don't want to live the life of fast food and regretss

Extra Large Marge
Jan 21, 2004

Fun Shoe
If it's not in a can, it don't go in this man

a creepy colon
Oct 28, 2004

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Arian_Samurai posted:

If it's not in a can, it don't go in this man

do u get all ur jokes from bobs burgers

big nipples big life
May 12, 2014

Three Olives posted:


Carrot Hot Dogs


I would cut someone out of my life for serving me this.

rcman50166
Mar 23, 2010

by XyloJW
whats the point of putting so much effort into something that it literally going to turn into poo poo?

also there was a thread in there about gruel once. somehow that was a peak of comedy for them

Burt Sexual
Jan 26, 2006

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Switchblade Switcharoo
I like Franks Red HOt mixed in with my pork and beans. Would I fit in? This is important.

Decrepus
May 21, 2008

In the end, his dominion did not touch a single poster.


Good standup comedy bit.

Inexplicable Humblebrag
Sep 20, 2003

gws is not good

there is no interest in sharing workhorse recipes or showcasing basic techniques well (e.g. pan selection, pastry making). whenever a simple beginners recipe that does not contain sous vide machines is presented it is greeted with derision

PlantRobot posted:

don't let your food hobby make you into a bastard, basically

Guancho
Aug 23, 2010

You don't write any postcards when you're on the road to self-discovery
steak and eggs 3 times a day. erryday

Burt Sexual
Jan 26, 2006

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Switchblade Switcharoo

scalded schlong posted:

gws is not good

there is no interest in sharing workhorse recipes or showcasing basic techniques well (e.g. pan selection, pastry making). whenever a simple beginners recipe that does not contain sous vide machines is presented it is greeted with derision

But that was a great thread that spawned others and made its way around all the subforums?

Hustle Hound
Oct 21, 2012

all is known

Darth123123 posted:

But that was a great thread that spawned others and made its way around all the subforums?

until an admin sanctioned it people were like "wtf is this bullshit, only three ingredients?!?! also why are you speaking weird"

spank my snatch
Jun 4, 2009

Whatever you're making just add garlic. Garlic fixes everything.

boner confessor
Apr 25, 2013

by R. Guyovich
i have a dish where i boil half an onion and a couple handfuls of beans in a pot for 40 minutes, then add salt and garlic

i call it Hot Beans

OMFG FURRY
Jul 10, 2006

[snarky comment]

poverty goat
Feb 15, 2004



there are some really good recipes on the goons with spoons wiki

Sesame Chicken (via wayback machine because some idiot removed it from the live wiki)
butter chicken
chicken vindaloo
Char Siu Bao
Chili Powder (this is really easy and will make your chili and tacos and pretty much everything that uses chili powder more better, never buy chili powder at the store it is trash)
Guinness Beef Stew
Pad Thai (seriously the worst thing about GWS is that these fucks keep deleting the good recipes from the live wiki)
turducken
General Tso's Chicken (also deleted from the live wiki by idiots)

poverty goat fucked around with this message at 19:11 on Jul 1, 2014

Decrepus
May 21, 2008

In the end, his dominion did not touch a single poster.


Yeah I am going to go make a loving turducken thanks a lot forums poster grrrrpouuur

poverty goat
Feb 15, 2004



Decrepus posted:

Yeah I am going to go make a loving turducken thanks a lot forums poster grrrrpouuur

I made one for christmas a few years ago it was fun

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005
GWS: Martha Stewart's Autistic Crock Pot.

Three Olives
Apr 10, 2005

What if Hitler invented the BMW i3 Subcompact Electric car?

I don't know if you guys have them yet it's kind of new and hip and underground but they have this thing now that's kind of a like a restaurant but instead of eating there they pack up your food and you can take it home and eat it. Some of them will even bring it to your house.

WoodrowSkillson
Feb 24, 2005

*Gestures at 60 years of Lions history*

i use hamburger helper enchilada mix to make the filling i use for soft shell tacos.

Xaris
Jul 25, 2006

Lucky there's a family guy
Lucky there's a man who positively can do
All the things that make us
Laugh and cry

gggiiimmmppp posted:

there are some really good recipes on the goons with spoons wiki

Sesame Chicken (via wayback machine because some idiot removed it from the live wiki)
butter chicken
chicken vindaloo
Char Siu Bao
Chili Powder (this is really easy and will make your chili and tacos and pretty much everything that uses chili powder more better, never buy chili powder at the store it is trash)
Guinness Beef Stew
Pad Thai (seriously the worst thing about GWS is that these fucks keep deleting the good recipes from the live wiki)
turducken
General Tso's Chicken (also deleted from the live wiki by idiots)

holy gently caress, except maybe the turducken, those all sound good. why the hell would they delete them.

Shirley Crabtree
Aug 8, 2012
poo poo you're right here's a random quote

SubG posted:

Almost all the interesting things that happen in a piece of chicken happen between about 50 and about 60 C; it's where the fraction of soluble proteins starts to take a nosedive and the fraction of soluble collagen starts to rapidly rise. In a water bath this is going to be fairly homogeneous---the temperature in one part of a piece of meat will be pretty close to the temperature in other parts---while in conventional cooking you're going to see much more variability. This is important because meat's a pretty complex system, and when you give a temperature for the denaturing of a particular protein, this might be good for that protein in isolation, but the exact temperature an individual protein in a particular piece of meat will denature in actual practice will depend on a bunch of other factors, and so any number will be more of a probabilistic approximation than a scientific law or whatever.

My point here is that a surface temperature of 155 F/68 C (or whatever) might be something that a piece of chicken can hold up to via some methods (say deep frying) and you won't necessarily see all of the bad changes that negatively effect texture and mouthfeel, but in a puddle machine you're effectively moving the entire piece closer to the `brink' of that condition, so you might have problems at say 150 F/65 C.

I usually do poultry in the puddle machine at around 57 C/135 F to deal with this without having to dance around with having to do the whole hydrotherapy thing to cool the meat---I just rest it for a couple minutes between puddle machine and sear, which also gives it time to dry off a bit, which also helps with the sear. It's something you can play around with by feel---as long as you're holding for long enough (and the hold times around 57 C are around 45 minutes, so if you're doing a several hour cook this isn't an issue) there's no food safety issue, so you're just loving around looking for the texture and mouthfeel you like. Duck and turkey can handle being vizzled at lower temperatures without getting squoogy, but if I think the general belief in low temperature chicken having a hosed up texture is largely overstated. In any event, it's something that you can certainly just experiment with until you find what satisfies your personal preference.

...but has a specific heat of about half that of water (2.46 J/g °C versus 4.19). And the average household freezer is calibrated for about -18 C (0 F). So if the object you're trying to cool is at 60 C (140 F), then what you're interested in is the fact that a gram of pure ethanol at -18 C will eat about 192 J, while a gram of pure water at 0 C will eat about 251 J (to get either to 60 C).

You're much better off just putting a bunch of ice cubes in water and using that as a water bath if you want to cool something off quickly.

why can't he just say he boiled a loving chicken

Neptr
Mar 1, 2011
There's no weed recipes thread just to give you an idea of the lovely posting in GWS

a creepy colon
Oct 28, 2004

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Gypsum Fantastic posted:

poo poo you're right here's a random quote


why can't he just say he boiled a loving chicken

lol what a loving autist

Jonny 290
May 5, 2005



[ASK] me about OS/2 Warp

WoodrowSkillson posted:

i use hamburger helper enchilada mix to make the filling i use for soft shell tacos.

nice. i make a package of mexican rice-a-roni and use that for the rice when we have burrito night

a creepy colon
Oct 28, 2004

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Neptr posted:

There's no weed recipes thread just to give you an idea of the lovely posting in GWS

theyre all in the TCC (a good forum) edible thread

Hustle Hound
Oct 21, 2012

all is known

Three Olives posted:

I don't know if you guys have them yet it's kind of new and hip and underground but they have this thing now that's kind of a like a restaurant but instead of eating there they pack up your food and you can take it home and eat it. Some of them will even bring it to your house.

the keurig owner hath spoken

LifeSizePotato
Mar 3, 2005

Gypsum Fantastic posted:

poo poo you're right here's a random quote


why can't he just say he boiled a loving chicken

it's called abs (alton brown syndrome)

Dexters Secret
Jun 19, 2014

Prokhor Zakharov posted:

You put BEANS in CHILI!?

There outta be concentration camps for people like you!!

i agree with this unironically

Xaris
Jul 25, 2006

Lucky there's a family guy
Lucky there's a man who positively can do
All the things that make us
Laugh and cry

LifeSizePotato posted:

it's called abs (alton brown syndrome)

i miss good eats. alton actually seemed happy doing that compared to his poo poo competition shows where hes a burnt out husk of a human being and looks bored to tears. plus it was a pretty down to earth decent novice cooking show

FogHelmut
Dec 18, 2003

LifeSizePotato posted:

it's called abs (alton brown syndrome)

at least alton brown has a conscience. this is some pedantic autism.

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WoodrowSkillson
Feb 24, 2005

*Gestures at 60 years of Lions history*

gonna make burgers tonight i think, get some of the clearance buns are meijer on the way home, chop up a few tomatoes and onions and use the foreman to cook the fuckers

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