Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Locked thread
Trixie Hardcore
Jul 1, 2006

Placeholder.

HowSoonIsNow posted:

Good question thank you! It did a couple times and in each instance i regretted it. People say things that you can't take to heart, its all erection talk.

And yeah OMG i went to dinner with this guy one time and he was like 400 lbs and i felt bad cause his wife died but i was like no, this is not going further.

Wait you didn't even stroke the poor guy off? Really fat guys will pay top dollar for a pathetically limited amount of contact.


e: I mean, I'm not trying to tell you how to whore here but come on

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

George H.W. Cunt
Oct 6, 2010





lol how can you charge someone and then not have sex with them? you get shot in texas for that theft of property

HowSoonIsNow
Nov 9, 2013

Business Octopus posted:

150/hour seems really low to me. are you busted looking or just kind of plain looking but have a stupid purple haircut with one or two lovely piercings and bad nerd glasses like how i picture a goon whore to look?

Haha thats outcall rate, its 200 incall. But yeah im kinda plain, i made my money with my ability i guess. I can link a review

Shiki Dan
Oct 27, 2010

If ya can move ya toes ya back's fine
What's the biggest scare you ever had on the job? Whether it was personal safety, health risk, or being caught by LE?

Also, how often did you get tested? How did you handle health insurance and other issues? Was escorting your only full-time gig or was it moonlighting from another job/college?

EDIT: You charge(d) more for incall than outcall???

concerned mom
Apr 22, 2003

by Lowtax
Grimey Drawer
wait are we being next level marketted

Lowtax
Nov 16, 1999

by Skyl3lazer

SaltLick posted:

lol how can you charge someone and then not have sex with them? you get shot in texas for that theft of property
At least you guys can't accuse me of that, every time you pay me I gently caress you over properly

HowSoonIsNow
Nov 9, 2013

Trixie Hardcore posted:

Wait you didn't even stroke the poor guy off? Really fat guys will pay top dollar for a pathetically limited amount of contact.


e: I mean, I'm not trying to tell you how to whore here but come on

No i know but JESUS if you had seen him... Like i try to be kind but he was like a really fat warty charles bronson with horrible music taste

Three Olives
Apr 10, 2005

What if Hitler invented the BMW i3 Subcompact Electric car?

HowSoonIsNow posted:

Haha thats outcall rate, its 200 incall. But yeah im kinda plain, i made my money with my ability i guess. I can link a review

Post a photo we should get to see what a $200 an hour goon whore looks like.

concerned mom
Apr 22, 2003

by Lowtax
Grimey Drawer
this place goes down on everyone too

wearing a lampshade
Mar 6, 2013

HowSoonIsNow posted:

I know i have a sexually repressed background and i dont know whats normal sexually,,amongst the internet weirdos


Like how often a day did you rosebudd, and did you ever taste the rosebudd? whats ur favourite rosebudd position

Lowtax
Nov 16, 1999

by Skyl3lazer

concerned mom posted:

this place goes down on everyone too
A+

Nigmaetcetera
Nov 17, 2004

borkborkborkmorkmorkmork-gabbalooins
You into crystal?

MotherFuckingT-REX
Feb 8, 2011

I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT
I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT
tell me about all the times at the end of the month and your bills were due so you let that one client's weird poo poo slide because you needed the money, that weird client is me, and all i wanted was for you to lay in my bed in my hovel apartment there is garbage and dirty laundry everywhere and i hold you and seem so happy and im pretending your my girlfriend and you play along

i dont even do sex to you i just make chat and cook a gross microwave meal for us and spend time with you but somehow its worse because its all just sad foreplay to the good night kiss and i awkwardly fondle you in bed and sniff your smells and try and make conversation but its all somehow a little off

Inexplicable Humblebrag
Sep 20, 2003

link the review, OP

did you ever score crack for your clients, OP

George H.W. Cunt
Oct 6, 2010





how was your competition on backpage?

wearing a lampshade
Mar 6, 2013

whats your stance on the caliphate OP

do you think they should be a califelate instead?

HowSoonIsNow
Nov 9, 2013

Shiki Dan posted:

What's the biggest scare you ever had on the job? Whether it was personal safety, health risk, or being caught by LE?

Also, how often did you get tested? How did you handle health insurance and other issues? Was escorting your only full-time gig or was it moonlighting from another job/college?

The biggest scare was minor, a guy hid behind the door when he opened it and i was like WHAT THE gently caress but he explained some escorts do that, so it was a misunderstanding :3

I get tested every three months, and sometimes more because i am a bit of a hypochondriac.

I did it to pay the money i owed for college (yeah i have a faggy lib arts degree) and then to pay for the life after.i work retail now lol

jazzyhattrick
Jul 1, 2010

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
What's the biggest dick you've ever seen? Can't believe we're on page 3 and nobody's asked this yet.

HowSoonIsNow
Nov 9, 2013

SaltLick posted:

how was your competition on backpage?

Fierce ugh :(

nomadologique
Mar 9, 2011

DUNK A DILL PICKLE REALDO

Trixie Hardcore posted:

wtf is the point of starting this thread if you are too embarrassed to go into the hosed up poo poo clients are into?


escorts have to be entertaining & listen to men whine about their lives on top of the loving.

also prostitutes? since i think plenty of men just cry and talk to prostitutes and never sex them

SirEvelynTremble
Dec 25, 2013

FUCK YOU HITLER
STALINGRAD
ROFLMFAO
Have you ever hosed a furry?

wearing a lampshade
Mar 6, 2013

have you ever seen a mutant dick

like a freakish abomination of a dick, that grew weird or has like two dickholes

conversely, did you ever see any weird dick modifications and what did you do with them

HowSoonIsNow
Nov 9, 2013

jazzyhattrick posted:

What's the biggest dick you've ever seen? Can't believe we're on page 3 and nobody's asked this yet.

That actually hopened before i got into the game it was this old jerk who may be dead by now, but it was like two coke cans stacked together.

In the line of duty about ....my measurements suck but like a big ok sign around and 8 inches long

HowSoonIsNow
Nov 9, 2013

SirEvelynTremble posted:

Have you ever hosed a furry?

OMFG. he had a fedora nd if i pried deeper im sure is have found his fursuit. Only once

Shiki Dan
Oct 27, 2010

If ya can move ya toes ya back's fine

HowSoonIsNow posted:


I did it to pay the money i owed for college (yeah i have a faggy lib arts degree) and then to pay for the life after.i work retail now lol

I'm so sorry.

Maybe I'll give you a call once you get back into escorting.

HowSoonIsNow
Nov 9, 2013

nomadologique posted:

also prostitutes? since i think plenty of men just cry and talk to prostitutes and never sex them

Idk, i had a sugar daddy thats where most the weird poo poo came from tbh

Business Octopus
Jun 27, 2005

Me IRL

HowSoonIsNow posted:

Haha thats outcall rate, its 200 incall. But yeah im kinda plain, i made my money with my ability i guess. I can link a review

please do. What's your best sex skill?

HowSoonIsNow
Nov 9, 2013

Shiki Dan posted:

I'm so sorry.

Maybe I'll give you a call once you get back into escorting.

;)

Serious post, im quitting cause my on/off bf wants to get a place and i cant sneak around and i dont like his accusations

HowSoonIsNow
Nov 9, 2013

Business Octopus posted:

please do. What's your best sex skill?

Oral

MotherFuckingT-REX
Feb 8, 2011

I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT
I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT
Does you being a prostitute have anytihng to do with your posts in TCC about smoking crack??


jazzyhattrick
Jul 1, 2010

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

HowSoonIsNow posted:

Two coke cans stacked together.

Was the ring pull on the end a turn off or are you into that kind of thing?

HowSoonIsNow
Nov 9, 2013

MotherFuckingT-REX posted:

Does you being a prostitute have anytihng to do with your posts in TCC about smoking crack??

Yep. Ugly side of the biz. Thats why im quitting

SirEvelynTremble
Dec 25, 2013

FUCK YOU HITLER
STALINGRAD
ROFLMFAO

HowSoonIsNow posted:

;)

Serious post, im quitting cause my on/off bf wants to get a place and i cant sneak around and i dont like his accusations

BF : You're loving people for money!
HSIN : No I'm not!
BF : Why have I just found a 20 in your oval office?

HowSoonIsNow
Nov 9, 2013

HowSoonIsNow posted:

Yep. Ugly side of the biz. Thats why im quitting

But good detective work you sly fox ;)

HowSoonIsNow
Nov 9, 2013

SirEvelynTremble posted:

BF : You're loving people for money!
HSIN : No I'm not!
BF : Why have I just found a 20 in your oval office?

Hahaha! Ugh i had a story but mr goon detective is harshing my buzz

MotherFuckingT-REX
Feb 8, 2011

I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT
I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT

was this post actually escort code-slang?

MotherFuckingT-REX
Feb 8, 2011

I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT
I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT I WANNA THROW IT
just trying to get some answers op, for my questions, which can pertain to anything

HowSoonIsNow
Nov 9, 2013

MotherFuckingT-REX posted:

was this post actually escort code-slang?

Thats a mcchicken shoved in a big mac

Business Octopus
Jun 27, 2005

Me IRL

can you deepthroat and then lick the balls whhile the whole dick is jammed down your esophagus? all while giving an expert prostate massage? paint a picture for me op

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

HowSoonIsNow
Nov 9, 2013

MotherFuckingT-REX posted:

just trying to get some answers op, for my questions, which can pertain to anything

What are your questions? In a non dosgusting ironic way if possible

  • Locked thread