Waffle House

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > Waffle House

texaholic: Sep 16, 2007; Well it's floodin' down in Texas
All of the telephone lines are down

vyst posted:

is this the fat is beautiful thread?

This is the "down south you ain't get laid after leaving bar at 2am and are lookin to kick it with some authentic white trash and some mothafucka hood rats too" thread

# ? Jul 3, 2014 19:55

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# ? Apr 26, 2024 05:09

Steak: Dec 9, 2005; Pillbug

vyst posted:

I go to Perkins for my late night meals.

our perkins has a security guard dont' be so sanctimonious

# ? Jul 3, 2014 20:09

euphronius: Feb 18, 2009

The only time I was in a waffle house was in 1996 when I saw phish at Hamptom colisuem and took 4 hits of acid and went to Waffle House and I can't believe I made it through the experience the staff was remarkable at like 3 am - the restaurant was absolutely disgusting with water coming our of the bathroom and the glasses were dirty and I dont even remember the food - and I drew this fantastic triptych on the back of a napkin with a ball point pen that represented birth, life and decay in the modern context. But I lost that napkin sadly. Then I drove 5 people back to Washington DC while tripping and somehow lived.

# ? Jul 3, 2014 20:16

Stalizard: Aug 11, 2006; Have I got a headache!

large (that is the medium size) hash browns all the way. the waitress asks if you want chili or gravy, you say yes.

it's a goddamn guaranteed hangover cure, if you can survive it. don't waste it on your garden variety headache. this is the nuclear option. save it for the 'just got divorced' or 'my seeing eye dog died' style drinking binges.

also gently caress all you haters waffle house best house

# ? Jul 3, 2014 20:44

BrutalistMcDonalds: Oct 4, 2012; Lipstick Apathy

waffle house: it's a fun place

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nx21Fv12UDk

# ? Jul 3, 2014 21:01

Extra Large Marge: Jan 21, 2004; Fun Shoe

FizFashizzle posted:

TOO MANY RULES

# ? Jul 3, 2014 21:03

TheReverend: Jun 21, 2005

This rich kid from highschool (but otherwise kinda rednecky) ended up working at waffle house after college at their corporate office and now he's like manager of brand exposure or some other made up corporate title. Needless to say, he rolling in that hash brown money.

# ? Jul 3, 2014 21:08

TheReverend: Jun 21, 2005

And I live in that 'Burj Dubai' looking area of the map in the OP

# ? Jul 3, 2014 21:09

indigi: Jul 20, 2004; ^{how can we not talk about family

when family's all that we got?}

I straight up want chicken and waffles right now

# ? Jul 3, 2014 21:25

ElGroucho: Nov 1, 2005; We already - What about sticking our middle fingers up... That was insane; Fun Shoe

This thread needs more chili cheese hashbrowns

# ? Jul 3, 2014 21:26

indigi: Jul 20, 2004; ^{how can we not talk about family

when family's all that we got?}

ElGroucho posted:

This thread needs more chili cheese hashbrowns

nah tho

# ? Jul 3, 2014 21:27

Venom Snake: Feb 19, 2014; by Nyc_Tattoo

ElGroucho posted:

This thread needs more chili cheese hashbrowns

how the gently caress is this food.

burn the south to the ground, sherman was right

# ? Jul 3, 2014 21:28

Hobohemian: Sep 30, 2005; by XyloJW

I honestly feel bad for people that don't have a shitton of 24hr burrito places and are forced to eat poo poo food from some dumb Denney's or a waffle house at 4 am. Your lives must just be terrible. You should move. You idiots in Arizona need be especially ashamed because you actually do have those and you choose not to eat there.

# ? Jul 3, 2014 21:30

BrutalistMcDonalds: Oct 4, 2012; Lipstick Apathy

Hobohemian posted:

I honestly feel bad for people that don't have a shitton of 24hr burrito places and are forced to eat poo poo food from some dumb Denney's or a waffle house at 4 am. Your lives must just be terrible. You should move. You idiots in Arizona need be especially ashamed because you actually do have those and you choose not to eat there.

do you live in L.A. or San Francisco or San Juan, Puerto Rico or something

# ? Jul 3, 2014 21:33

ElGroucho: Nov 1, 2005; We already - What about sticking our middle fingers up... That was insane; Fun Shoe

Hobohemian posted:

I honestly feel bad for people that don't have a shitton of 24hr burrito places and are forced to eat poo poo food from some dumb Denney's or a waffle house at 4 am. Your lives must just be terrible. You should move. You idiots in Arizona need be especially ashamed because you actually do have those and you choose not to eat there.

Burritos, spoken like another Californian. Unless those burritos are from mother loving Burritos Cristosomo, stick that burrito in your poop-hole buddy

This is drunk food country :wafflehouse: :fsmug:

# ? Jul 3, 2014 21:34

indigi: Jul 20, 2004; ^{how can we not talk about family

when family's all that we got?}

taqueria el taco loco in the inner mission is my jawn

# ? Jul 3, 2014 21:38

Extra Large Marge: Jan 21, 2004; Fun Shoe

Hobohemian posted:

I honestly feel bad for people that don't have a shitton of 24hr burrito places and are forced to eat poo poo food from some dumb Denney's or a waffle house at 4 am. Your lives must just be terrible. You should move. You idiots in Arizona need be especially ashamed because you actually do have those and you choose not to eat there.

Come on man, the meat they use for burritos is mostly horse assholes

# ? Jul 3, 2014 21:44

psyopmonkey: Nov 15, 2008; by Lowtax

ElGroucho posted:

This thread needs more chili cheese hashbrowns

Thats absolutely disgusting, and it smells like poo poo too. One of the guys I knew when I was in Augusta ate that once.

Once.

Glass sheet the entire south.

# ? Jul 3, 2014 21:51

The Dregs: Dec 29, 2005; MY TREEEEEEEE!

Pour your frozen potato bits on the grill.
Add a ladle of yellow grease.
Slice of american cheese.
Jalapenos from a can.
Add a mess of chili on top. (the chili is actually pretty tasty, though)

This is what Southerners think of when they think of fine breakfast food. I am not lying they actually believe this is the best breakfast around. Waffle Houses are packed with families every weekend morning.

# ? Jul 3, 2014 22:52

Snodgrass Supreme: Nov 6, 2012

The Dregs posted:

Pour your frozen potato bits on the grill.
Add a ladle of yellow grease.
Slice of american cheese.
Jalapenos from a can.
Add a mess of chili on top. (the chili is actually pretty tasty, though)

This is what Southerners think of when they think of fine breakfast food. I am not lying they actually believe this is the best breakfast around. Waffle Houses are packed with families every weekend morning.

yeah that slop is delicious, are you done with yours?

# ? Jul 4, 2014 00:41

Admiral Bosch: Apr 19, 2007; Who is Admiral Aken Bosch, and what is that old scoundrel up to?

Iron Crowned posted:

You ever had Waffle House pussy?

yes actually

wait, an employee or another patron

# ? Jul 4, 2014 01:20

Subliminal Sauce: Apr 6, 2010; Spreading freedom and spreading it thick; that's just a thing us right-wing nutjobs do!

You should stick to the breakfast menu and not commit armed robbery there, but it looks like we're mostly in agreement on these points.

# ? Jul 4, 2014 01:45

SPACE HOMOS: Jan 12, 2005

ElGroucho posted:

This thread needs more chili cheese hashbrowns

Order hash browns with everything on it.

# ? Jul 4, 2014 01:52

bigzak: Aug 15, 2003

if you don't like waffle house then go back to communist russia or china or whatever african shithole gently caress you

# ? Jul 4, 2014 01:57

redshirt: Aug 11, 2007; Reporting for shovel mission Sir.

Where's the most north-eastern Waffle House?

Are they pussies like Krispy Kreme and don't dare spread to the North?

# ? Jul 4, 2014 01:58

Alberto Basalm: Nov 14, 2005

redshirt posted:

Where's the most north-eastern Waffle House?

Are they pussies like Krispy Kreme and don't dare spread to the North?

It's not that the chain is made up of pussies, it's that the north is full of sissies who can't handle stumbling into a restaurant at 4am in a haze

edit: I have NEVER been to waffle house sober, and the food there owns

# ? Jul 4, 2014 02:01

Robo Reagan: Feb 12, 2012; by Fluffdaddy

The Dregs posted:

Waffle House is pretty disappointing if you grew up in an area with decent food. Southerners just don't know any better and will defend it to the death. Their signature hash browns are poured frozen from a damned milk carton on to the grill.

The waffles are fine, I guess. If you don't mind nasty corn syrup "maple syrup' and margarine on them.

As far as drunk food, it is only alright. But as a drunk place to eat and hang out, it is A-loving-OK! The people watching there is the best.

lollin' @ this since even a mediocre bbq joint can make you beaucoup bucks up north

# ? Jul 4, 2014 02:02

ElGroucho: Nov 1, 2005; We already - What about sticking our middle fingers up... That was insane; Fun Shoe

If you can't crawl your way in to a Waffle House and share a cup of coffee with a methed out hooker and a dude who just got out of jail

Then brother, you ain't getting the full American experience

# ? Jul 4, 2014 02:03

psyopmonkey: Nov 15, 2008; by Lowtax

Alberto Basalm posted:

It's not that the chain is made up of pussies, it's that the north is full of sissies who can't handle stumbling into a restaurant at 4am in a haze

edit: I have NEVER been to waffle house sober, and the food there owns

It sounds like northerners act like adults and dont stumble into disgusting shitholes to eat crap food...

Keep being disgusting American south! I need your slovenly lifestyle to fund my 2nd pension.

# ? Jul 4, 2014 02:05

ZombieParts: Jul 18, 2009; ASK ME ABOUT VISITING PROSTITUTES IN CHINA AND FEELING NO SHAME. MY FRIEND IS SERIOUSLY THE (PATHETIC) YODA OF PAYING WOMEN TO TOUCH HIS (AND MY) DICK. THEY WOULDN'T DO IT OTHERWISE.

ElGroucho posted:

This thread needs more chili cheese hashbrowns

how far do you have to let yourself go for that to look good

# ? Jul 4, 2014 02:07

Alberto Basalm: Nov 14, 2005

psyopmonkey posted:

It sounds like northerners act like adults and dont stumble into disgusting shitholes to eat crap food...

Keep being disgusting American south! I need your slovenly lifestyle to fund my 2nd pension.

being an "adult" is no fun so the south keeps it real and is the drinkingest and smokingest place around

edit:

ZombieParts posted:

how far do you have to let yourself go for that to look good

about 6 or 7 shots

# ? Jul 4, 2014 02:07

ElGroucho: Nov 1, 2005; We already - What about sticking our middle fingers up... That was insane; Fun Shoe

ZombieParts posted:

how far do you have to let yourself go for that to look good

This is what I eat on Sundays after a 6 mile run

Carbs motherfucker

# ? Jul 4, 2014 02:08

BrutalistMcDonalds: Oct 4, 2012; Lipstick Apathy

redshirt posted:

Where's the most north-eastern Waffle House?

Are they pussies like Krispy Kreme and don't dare spread to the North?

google maps tells me there's one in Lackawanna, PA

# ? Jul 4, 2014 02:08

Robo Reagan: Feb 12, 2012; by Fluffdaddy

Alberto Basalm posted:

being an "adult" is no fun so the south keeps it real and is the drinkingest and smokingest place around

case in point:

the most economic way to get completely shitfaced in no time at all

# ? Jul 4, 2014 02:09

psyopmonkey: Nov 15, 2008; by Lowtax

Robo Reagan posted:

case in point:

the most economic way to get completely shitfaced in no time at all

Im missing 12hours out of my memory/life in Fayettenam, NC due to that poo poo.

That liquid is brain cleanser...

# ? Jul 4, 2014 02:11

Alberto Basalm: Nov 14, 2005

2 shots of everclear and some hawaiian punch makes for a good night!!

# ? Jul 4, 2014 02:12

Alec Bald Snatch: Sep 12, 2012; by exmarx

psyopmonkey posted:

It sounds like northerners act like adults and dont stumble into disgusting shitholes to eat crap food...

Keep being disgusting American south! I need your slovenly lifestyle to fund my 2nd pension.

lovely food knows no geographic boundaries