Search Amazon.com:
Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us $3,400 per month for bandwidth bills alone, and since we don't believe in shoving popup ads to our registered users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
«6 »
  • Post
  • Reply
Dr. Witherbone
Nov 1, 2010

CHEESE LOOKS ON IN
DESPAIR BUT ALSO WITH
AN ERECTION

Meet this poor bastard:


He bought a house. It was a cheap house! It was $175,000 dollars. Not bad. Except it was, everywhere, with everything, constantly, and he's still discovering new poo poo that's wrong comically, insanely wrong with it a year later. He signed a waiver basically waiving any recourse he could ever have and preemptively telling himself to go gently caress himself, which is amazing, because the only reason you would ever sign such a thing is to get screwed.

He got screwed/is getting screwed. Come watch

So far just some samples, I'll leave it to you to go digging:

•Drain and water intake combo between sink, shower, and toilet that never works

•Load bearing support? Pffft, previous owners took that poo poo OUT, structural integrity is for cowards

•Cable tv? Anywhere? Anywhere in the house?

No, gently caress you.

•16 year old water heater 4 years past warranty (exploded a couple months ago)

•Screws drilled directly into water pipes, immediately causing mold in walls the second a tap is used

•Built in raccoon habitat

Seriously, go digging, this is already an innaproprate level of detail for a nuGBS thread. Go. Bring back what you find: http://www.hoodwinkedhouse.com/#sth...0.BImYLWw1.dpbs

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

JakeP
Apr 27, 2003

i'm so sorry but i have to go now. my time here is finally ogre.


how do people so stupid have the money to put a down payment on a $175k house, what the gently caress

TheJoker138
Jan 1, 2008

The Clown Prince
of Crime


There is literally nothing behind this mans eyes. No emotion, no intelligence. He's got a blanker expression than Terri Schiavo.

Adventure Pigeon
Nov 8, 2005

I am a master storyteller.

what's wrong with his face?

Dr. Witherbone
Nov 1, 2010

CHEESE LOOKS ON IN
DESPAIR BUT ALSO WITH
AN ERECTION

Adventure Pigeon posted:

what's wrong with his face?

I'm an rear end in a top hat and took a screencap of him mid-sentence in an interview

I do feel sorry for him though. Dude's sunk like, 100k into repairing the place and now he's repairing the repairs. Water is seeping through the new cement in his basement.

bitchtard
Dec 3, 2010



It's impossible to know everything about a house before you buy it.

Picnic Princess
Feb 9, 2008



Looks like hiring a third party home inspector isn't a requirement where he lives.

USA! USA!

HoboZero
Apr 19, 2008

MORON


It feels a little like blaming a surprise sex victim, but this guy is a tremendous loving idiot who ignored all possible signs of his impending stretched rear end in a top hat. I notice that he only contacts the county inspector after he's laid his livelihood on the tracks and signed the giant "can we gently caress you with no possible recourse you dolt" form. Holy poo poo.

E: And, of course, gently caress the seller/realtor, obviously.

The Droid
Jun 11, 2012



JakeP posted:

how do people so stupid have the money to put a down payment on a $175k house, what the gently caress

"Finally a house I can afford! Sure, I'll sign this waiver, its just a formality, I bet!"

Alereon
Feb 6, 2004

For me but LEFTHANDED

he did have the place inspected, inspectors are there to find incompetence and negligence not intentionally covered-up fraud.

bitchtard
Dec 3, 2010



Alereon posted:

he did have the place inspected, inspectors are there to find incompetence and negligence not intentionally covered-up fraud.

yeah we did this in the OSHA thread too. people think inspectors = wizard or something

Samuel L. ACKSYN
Feb 29, 2008




even tim the toolman taylor be shakin his head at this pitiful domicile

Larry Parrish
Jul 9, 2012


Alereon posted:

he did have the place inspected, inspectors are there to find incompetence and negligence not intentionally covered-up fraud.

idk there was a few things that were hidden in plain sight under a sink or something and im just thinking, why the hell didnt the owner take a peek under there?

im pooping!
Nov 17, 2006


holy gently caress i read that whole thing and that dude got raped

McDowell
Aug 1, 2008

Surely, Caligula was my greatest role

Hedge funds have been buying up properties with cash

'Flip this House!'

SaltLick
Oct 6, 2010



This was the best derail from OSHA thread

HoboZero
Apr 19, 2008

MORON


Alereon posted:

he did have the place inspected, inspectors are there to find incompetence and negligence not intentionally covered-up fraud.

For a $300 inspection fee, a different grizzled old gencon came to both of my pending homes (with my presence required) and spent three hours taking pictures while explaining everything he was doing, what he found that was/was not a problem, and delivered a 30-page packet of itemized, multi-disciplinary code footnotes with recommendations for longevity and importance throughout. The OP story dude magically discovered years of raccoon poo poo in his attic and a giant hole where they got in/out, which would have been apparent to even the most cursory inspection.

If he had his home inspected, this dude seems like the kind of guy who would detail getting the inspector's info from the county licensing official who came out afterwards, doesn't he? Not that he'd have to, though, because he would have had to hire the inspector himself if he didn't sign off on the 'as-is' clause, which he did. I don't think this guy got a pre-inspection.

Raskolnikov38
Mar 3, 2007

Sherman on the attack!
Tear 'em to shreds goddamn it!

the absolute best part of this is that literally a day after he bought, a tree fell on it.

Frostwerks
Sep 24, 2007


this is the f-35 to grover's f-22

HoboZero
Apr 19, 2008

MORON


This thread and the OSHA thread are literally just shitdadstalkabout.php

Dr. Witherbone
Nov 1, 2010

CHEESE LOOKS ON IN
DESPAIR BUT ALSO WITH
AN ERECTION

Frostwerks posted:

this is the f-35 to grover's f-22

comes along bort
Sep 12, 2012



what kind of idiot drains a flooded basement with a shop vac instead of a sump pump?

Gunktacular
Dec 4, 2009


Frostwerks posted:

this is the f-35 to grover's f-22

Absolute Lithops
Aug 28, 2011

After one long season
of waiting, after one
long season of wanting


Actually the people who remodeled this house are way more competent than Grover ever was.

Lonely Virgil
Oct 9, 2012



it could be worst, at least he didn't buy snake house.

You Are A Elf
Apr 26, 2010


Just like in the OSHA.jpg thread, I have to side with the goons who said this guy says "ILLEGAL" way too loving much.

ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL

Pumpy Muffinz
Aug 11, 2008

Banned?

I hate you all so much!

bitchtard
Dec 3, 2010



Pumpy Muffinz posted:

I hate you all so much!

<3

ALL-PRO SEXMAN
Nov 8, 2006

Veni, vidi, Lombardi.


Frostwerks posted:

this is the f-35 to grover's f-22

Necros
Jul 23, 2003



bitchtard posted:

yeah we did this in the OSHA thread too. people think inspectors = wizard or something

the inspector didn't need to be a wizard in this case. he just needed to actually do his job, but it wouldn't have made a difference because the guy already bought the place i guess.

Fabulousity
Dec 29, 2008

= (Displacement through a hetero medium) / Time


comes along bort posted:

what kind of idiot drains a flooded basement with a shop vac instead of a sump pump?

If he used milk crate bound BitCoin mining rigs to thaw out the west wall ice dam problem this Ouroboros of failure would be nothing less than sublime perfection.

A misanthrope
Jun 21, 2010

CAT DRUGS


owning houses is for chumps

rent a nice apartment and never have to fix anything or mow a lawn

Crow Jane
Oct 18, 2012




A misanthrope posted:

owning houses is for chumps

rent a nice apartment and never have to fix anything or mow a lawn

I have no desire to own a house when I can rent the top floor of a lovely Victorian townhouse for $400 a month + electric. I plan on staying here as long as my landlord allows it.

Nonsense
Jan 26, 2007



A misanthrope posted:

owning houses is for chumps

rent a nice apartment and never have to fix anything or mow a lawn

*smugly drives past home depot & people having to hire workers to mow their lawn*

HoboZero
Apr 19, 2008

MORON


It's almost like circumstances and preferences dictate where people want to live and there are manifold scenarios open to those who wish to plan for their future. My friends, this is why I want to invite you all to an investment opportunity I've recently come across. Have you heard of Wherever You're Knee-Deep in Vagina Properties, Inc?

The Taint Reaper
Sep 4, 2012

If you feel like this is happening to you, you must have read my post


A misanthrope posted:

owning houses is for chumps

rent a nice apartment and never have to fix anything or mow a lawn

This is why government owned/low income housing are always such trash heaps.

Parallax Scroll
Nov 13, 2009

spiderman

owned

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007
OXYGEN
THIEF


Doctor Bishop
Oct 22, 2013


You Are A Elf posted:

Just like in the OSHA.jpg thread, I have to side with the goons who said this guy says "ILLEGAL" way too loving much.

ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gz_wJArqSbg

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Troll Bridgington
Dec 22, 2011

Keeping up foreign relations.

Sign this contract, sir! I know it seems sketchy, but we're really nice people!

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply
«6 »