The Amazing Atheist wrote a book

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > The Amazing Atheist wrote a book

Sophy Wackles: Dec 17, 2000; > access main security grid
access: PERMISSION DENIED.

You see guys, society and rules and laws and poo poo are dumb. We should all be guided by the free market and our animal instincts. Except of course when that doesn't suit me, then there should be a rule about it.

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:25

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# ? Apr 26, 2024 16:18

Ramsus: Sep 14, 2002; by Hand Knit

zoux posted:

He raped slaves.

did he?

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:25

...of SCIENCE!: Apr 26, 2008; by Fluffdaddy

I'd hate God too if he gave me a tiny baby weiner

Tubgirl Cosplay posted:

I'm pretty sure there's not a one you couldn't get fervently advocating for phrenology within, like, fifteen minutes, if you threw up enough Wikipedia links and meaningless numbers.

The difference between phrenology and :biotruths:

is that at least phrenology is actually testable

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:25

Frog Act: Feb 10, 2012

Ramsus posted:

did he?

he hosed slaves which is, by definition, rape

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:26

Tubgirl Cosplay: Jan 10, 2011; by Ion Helmet

...of SCIENCE! posted:

I'd hate God too if he gave me a tiny baby weiner

The difference between phrenology and is that at least phrenology is actually testable

Who among those posting up their profound thoughts about innate human nature online is going to test it, or for that matter inform their opinion beyond reading part of a Wiki article? Tell them a long boring book with lots of science words confirmed that the moon is made out of green cheese, who gives a gently caress

Tubgirl Cosplay fucked around with this message at 20:30 on Jul 16, 2014

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:27

Trixie Hardcore: Jul 1, 2006; Placeholder.

Rhymenoserous posted:

Most internet atheists aren't really atheists. They basically took a basic human belief system and word replaced "god" with "science".

Militant atheism is just yet another evangelical creed minus the angelic bit that draws nutters from the woodwork.

Tubgirl Cosplay posted:

There's a lot of jesus freak MRAs and poo poo too they just don't post in the same online communities you do because when you're a born-again evangelical from South Carolina or w/e you probably don't like looking at goatse as much as civilized folk

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:28

Frog Act: Feb 10, 2012

bible thumpers are a distinctly different flavor of mra though

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:28

LethalGeek: Nov 4, 2009

Xaris posted:

naw that's pretty normal. most atheists like us don't give a poo poo and don't talk about it because there is really no need. so all you ever hear is the loudmouth retards instead of people who just keep it to themselves.

I've never understood athiests who create groups to do anything. The whole point is so I don't have to do poo poo and/or give a poo poo about anything cause it doesn't matter what the gently caress are you idiots doing?

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:29

Beef Turret: Jul 9, 2009; by Lowtax

Fandyien posted:

yeah but who didnt back then

the vast majority of the population. lol

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:30

big duck equals goose: Nov 7, 2006; by XyloJW

LethalGeek posted:

I've never understood athiests who create groups to do anything. The whole point is so I don't have to do poo poo and/or give a poo poo about anything cause it doesn't matter what the gently caress are you idiots doing?

Me and my life partner Julian are very angry about the state of schools!!

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:30

Frog Act: Feb 10, 2012

butplug accident posted:

the vast majority of the population. lol

they were busy raping their toothless hillfolk wives

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:30

KrunkMcGrunk: Jul 2, 2007; Sometimes I sit and think, and sometimes I just sit.

jesus man. his wife must be turbo crazy.

in her defense, the only way i'd want to be with a person like that is too beat the poo poo out of them too, i guess

still... gently caress

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:30

Ramsus: Sep 14, 2002; by Hand Knit

Fandyien posted:

he hosed slaves which is, by definition, rape

Because of the power disparity? So Bill Clinton raped Monica

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:31

The Monkey Man: Jun 10, 2012; HERD U WERE TALKIN SHIT

KrunkMcGrunk posted:

jesus man. his wife must be turbo crazy.

in her defense, the only way i'd want to be with a person like that is too beat the poo poo out of them too, i guess

still... gently caress

I'm pretty sure that she's never appeared in one of his videos. Even she knows better than that

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:31

zoux: Apr 28, 2006

Ramsus posted:

Because of the power disparity? So Bill Clinton raped Monica

While I normally agree that internships are a form of disparity, there's a difference between two citizens protected under the rule of law and a chattel slave and her master.

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:32

Germstore: Oct 17, 2012; A Serious Candidate For a Serious Time

Ramsus posted:

Because of the power disparity? So Bill Clinton raped Monica

Bill didn't have the legal right to kill Monica for any reason whatsoever.

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:32

Vulture Culture: Jul 14, 2003; I was never enjoying it. I only eat it for the nutrients.

Germstore posted:

Bill didn't have the legal right to kill Monica for any reason whatsoever.

except for the natural laws of evolution which made males bigger than females

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:33

Ramsus: Sep 14, 2002; by Hand Knit

hmm, I thought he and Sally Hemmings loved each other and kept their relationship on the down low because it was taboo. But then again just like you guys I wasn't there

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:34

zoux: Apr 28, 2006

Ramsus posted:

hmm, I thought he and Sally Hemmings loved each other and kept their relationship on the down low because it was taboo. But then again just like you guys I wasn't there

Yeah, that's what pedophiles say too.

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:34

SunAndSpring: Dec 4, 2013

yeah this is kinda why I like Ben Franklin better because he pulled all the women in town despite looking like this:

Dude didn't need no slaves to get head. motherfucker partied hard.

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:35

Frog Act: Feb 10, 2012

lmao if you think a slave in the particularly brutal transatlantic system could have genuine consensual sex w/their master

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:35

FizFashizzle: Mar 30, 2005

why in the name of god would you publish this and put your name to it

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:36

Tubgirl Cosplay: Jan 10, 2011; by Ion Helmet

lol why are you making unfunny serious posts at that guy you morons

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:36

Ramsus: Sep 14, 2002; by Hand Knit

zoux posted:

Yeah, that's what pedophiles say too.

Oh yeah I guess she was 15 when he started with her so i guess that's pretty amazing athiest of him

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:36

Ramsus: Sep 14, 2002; by Hand Knit

Tubgirl Cosplay posted:

lol why are you making unfunny serious posts at that guy you morons

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:37

Tubgirl Cosplay: Jan 10, 2011; by Ion Helmet

Oh poo poo it's by the same guy

fuckkk

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:40

zoux: Apr 28, 2006

Tubgirl Cosplay posted:

Oh poo poo it's by the same guy

fuckkk

Yeah, he's taking neckbeard back.

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:42

...of SCIENCE!: Apr 26, 2008; by Fluffdaddy

LethalGeek posted:

I've never understood athiests who create groups to do anything. The whole point is so I don't have to do poo poo and/or give a poo poo about anything cause it doesn't matter what the gently caress are you idiots doing?

Religion forms the backbone of a lot of social circles in the US, especially in the south. If you are principled enough to not lie about your beliefs then it is going to shut you out of a lot of avenues for socializing and networking.

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:42

Crazy Ted: Jul 29, 2003

SunAndSpring posted:

yeah this is kinda why I like Ben Franklin better because he pulled all the women in town despite looking like this:

Dude didn't need no slaves to get head. motherfucker partied hard.

Literally wrote an essay on how to enjoy banging old hookers.

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:49

Fishy Joe: Apr 19, 2005; Eat at Fishy Joe's

Fandyien posted:

he hosed slaves which is, by definition, rape

Come on, they were asking for it, I mean they made him biscuits and called him Suh, who could resist that kind of comeon?

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:50

Rhymenoserous: May 23, 2008

...of SCIENCE! posted:

Religion forms the backbone of a lot of social circles in the US, especially in the south. If you are principled enough to not lie about your beliefs then it is going to shut you out of a lot of avenues for socializing and networking.

That's because they all socialize in church groups: Which you don't want to go to anyways.

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:50

zoux: Apr 28, 2006

They didn't let Franklin write the Declaration because they were afraid that he would make the first letter of every line spell out I E A T P U S S Y G O O D

# ? Jul 16, 2014 20:51

Celery Face: Feb 18, 2012

The Amazing Atheist posted:

Rape isn't fatal. So imagine my indignation when I saw a chatroom called "Rape Survivors." Is this supposed to impress me? Someone hosed you when you didn't want to be hosed and you're amazed that you survived? Unless he used a chainsaw instead of his dick, what's the big deal? ... The word survivor applies to people who are alive after being stabbed 73 times with an ice pick or mauled by rabid wolverines, not to a woman who gets dick when she doesn't want it. Just because you got raped, you have to rape the English language? You vindictive bitch! Also, don't you ever get tired of being the victim? How many failed relationships are you going to blame on a single violation of your personal space?

The Amazing Atheist posted:

I think 14-year-old girls are hot. (Yeah, so does everyone else, but I actually admit it)

gently caress it, I'm just linking this entire thing here because no way am I reading all that poo poo.

# ? Jul 16, 2014 21:00

Frog Act: Feb 10, 2012

Benjamin Franklin posted:

I have perused your late mathematical Prize Question, proposed in lieu of one in Natural Philosophy, for the ensuing year, viz. �Une figure quelconque donnee, on demande d�y inscrire le plus grand nombre de fois possible une autre figure plus-petite quelconque, qui est aussi donnee�. I was glad to find by these following Words, �l�Acadeemie a jugee que cette deecouverte, en eetendant les bornes de nos connoissances, ne seroit pas sans UTILITE�, that you esteem Utility an essential Point in your Enquiries, which has n

ot always been the case with all Academies; and I conclude therefore that you have given this Question instead of a philosophical, or as the Learned express it, a physical one, because you could not at the time think of a physical one that promis�d greater_Utility.

Permit me then humbly to propose one of that sort for your consideration, and through you, if you approve it, for the serious

Enquiry of learned Physicians, Chemists, &c. of this enlightened Age. It is universally well known, That in digesting our common Food, there is created or produced in the Bowels of human Creatures, a great Quantity of Wind.

That the permitting this Air to escape and mix with the Atmosphere, is usually offensive to the Company, from the fetid Smell that accompanies it.

That all well-bred People therefore, to avoid giving such Offence, forcibly restrain the Efforts of Nature to discharge that Wind.

That so retain�d contrary to Nature, it not only gives frequently great present Pain, but occasions future Diseases, such as habitual Cholics, Ruptures, Tympanies, &c. often destructive of the Constitution, & sometimes of Life itself.

Were it not for the odiously offensive Smell accompanying such Escapes, polite People would probably be under no more Restraint in discharging such Wind in Company, than they are in spitting, or in blowing their Noses.

My Prize Question therefore should be, To discover some Drug wholesome & not disagreable, to be mix�d with our common Food, or Sauces, that shall render the natural Discharges of Wind from our Bodies, not only inoffensive, but agreable as Perfumes.

That this is not a chimerical Project, and altogether impossible, may appear from these Considerations. That we already have some Knowledge of Means capable of Varying that Smell. He that dines on stale Flesh, especially with much Addition of Onions, shall be able to afford a Stink that no Company can tolerate; while he that has lived for some Time on Vegetables only, shall have that Breath so pure as to be insensible to the most delicate Noses; and if he can manage so as to avoid the Report, he may any where give Vent to his Griefs, unnoticed. But as there are many to whom an entire Vegetable Diet would be inconvenient, and as a little Quick-Lime thrown into a Jakes will correct the amazing Quantity of fetid Air arising from the vast Mass of putrid Matter contain�d in such Places, and render it rather pleasing to the Smell, who knows but that a little Powder of Lime (or some other thing equivalent) taken in our Food, or perhaps a Glass of Limewater drank at Dinner, may have the same Effect on the Air produc�d in and issuing from our Bowels? This is worth the Experiment. Certain it is also that we have the Power of changing by slight Means the Smell of another Discharge, that of our Water. A few Stems of Asparagus eaten, shall give our Urine a disagreable Odour; and a Pill of Turpentine no bigger than a Pea, shall bestow on it the pleasing Smell of Violets. And why should it be thought more impossible in Nature, to find Means of making a Perfume of our Wind than of our Water?

For the Encouragement of this Enquiry, (from the immortal Honour to be reasonably expected by the Inventor) let it be considered of how small Importance to Mankind, or to how small a Part of Mankind have been useful those Discoveries in Science that have heretofore made Philosophers famous. Are there twenty Men in Europe at this Day, the happier, or even the easier, for any Knowledge they have pick�d out of Aristotle? What Comfort can the Vortices of Descartes give to a Man who has Whirlwinds in his Bowels! The Knowledge of Newton�s mutual Attraction of the Particles of Matter, can it afford Ease to him who is rack�d by their mutual Repulsion, and the cruel Distensions it occasions? The Pleasure arising to a few Philosophers, from seeing, a few Times in their Life, the Threads of Light untwisted, and separated by the Newtonian Prism into seven Colours, can it be compared with the Ease and Comfort every Man living might feel seven times a Day, by discharging freely the Wind from his Bowels? Especially if it be converted into a Perfume: For the Pleasures of one Sense being little inferior to those of another, instead of pleasing the Sight he might delight the Smell of those about him, & make Numbers happy, which to a benevolent Mind must afford infinite Satisfaction. The generous Soul, who now endeavours to find out whether the Friends he entertains like best Claret or Burgundy, Champagne or Madeira, would then enquire also whether they chose Musk or Lilly, Rose or Bergamot, and provide accordingly. And surely such a Liberty of Expressing one�s Scent-iments, and pleasing one another, is of infinitely more Importance to human Happiness than that Liberty of the Press, or of abusing one another, which the English are so ready to fight & die for. � In short, this Invention, if compleated, would be, as Bacon expresses it, bringing Philosophy home to Mens Business and Bosoms. And I cannot but conclude, that in Comparison therewith, for universal and continual UTILITY, the Science of the Philosophers above-mentioned, even with the Addition, Gentlemen, of your �Figure quelconque� and the Figures inscrib�d in it, are, all together, scarcely worth a

# ? Jul 16, 2014 21:02

Trixie Hardcore: Jul 1, 2006; Placeholder.

Rhymenoserous posted:

That's because they all socialize in church groups: Which you don't want to go to anyways.

Depends on where you live, in some areas the local Christians finding out you aren't one of them is enough for them to devote their days to trying to make your day suck, from treating you like poo poo on the street to treating you like poo poo at the store to treating you like poo poo at your job and so on. I can certainly see the appeal of being able to talk to people who aren't going to treat you like poo poo for not being Christian so it's a shame that most atheist groups are insufferable.

# ? Jul 16, 2014 21:09

Libelous Slander: May 1, 2009; ... you're just creepy ...

why are you comparing banana buttman to ben franklin whyyy

# ? Jul 16, 2014 21:12

LethalGeek: Nov 4, 2009

...of SCIENCE! posted:

Religion forms the backbone of a lot of social circles in the US, especially in the south. If you are principled enough to not lie about your beliefs then it is going to shut you out of a lot of avenues for socializing and networking.

I get that but it stills strikes me as the most assbackwords reason to form a group to hang out with. I'd rather go hang out with coin collectors than go meet other atheists. What do they talk about besides being stereotypes with "religion = bad" x 1000?

# ? Jul 16, 2014 21:56

Hometown Slime Queen: Oct 26, 2004; the GOAT

So how hard do you think that ginger girl is pegging him on like a scale of 1 to 10?

Edit: NM maybe he just uses his banana when he wants that

# ? Jul 16, 2014 21:57

Beef Turret: Jul 9, 2009; by Lowtax

people only bring up Bananagate because they cant refute his arguments (nice kinkshaming btw)

# ? Jul 16, 2014 21:59

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# ? Apr 26, 2024 16:18

LethalGeek: Nov 4, 2009

butplug accident posted:

people only bring up Bananagate because they cant refute his arguments (nice kinkshaming btw)

Kinkshaming is my kink :aaa:

# ? Jul 16, 2014 22:01

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