Stretch goals for the SA Forums Kickstarter

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > Stretch goals for the SA Forums Kickstarter

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Commie Lasorda: May 15, 2009; IT'S CLOBBERIN' TIME!

$2,941,775,109,344.27 - OKAY FINE, we'll fix the search and archives finally

# ? Jul 17, 2014 00:06

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# ? Apr 23, 2024 17:55

Montague Tigg: Mar 23, 2008; Previously, on "Ronnie Likes Data":

Rocket Baby Dolls posted:

I'll recreate Goatse for $69.42

Oh a "stretch" goal I get it

That's a good one

# ? Jul 17, 2014 00:07

I. M. Gei: Jun 26, 2005; CHIEFS

BITCH

$1,200,000,000 - Make a new forums admin position called "Forums God-Christ" with special privileges and super-admin powers above those of even Lowtax himself, of which I, Dr. Gitmo Moneyson, shall be the sole holder for all time.

Special privileges and powers of the Forums God-Christ shall include, but not be limited to:

No other user shall ever have any position of authority, privilege, or power above those of the Forums God-Christ at any time, ever.
Complete immunity from all forms of ban and probation, except those approved by the Forums God-Christ Himself.
The ability to take away any and all forms of mod-ship, admin-ship, IK-ship, etc. at any time and for any reason, along with any and all associated powers and privileges.
Whatever the gently caress else I feel like because gently caress yall I'm the KANG!!!!!

# ? Jul 17, 2014 00:17

Rated PG-34: Jul 1, 2004

66,666,666 BTC

Lowtax builds the Pyramid where He and all goons will be entombed following His death.

# ? Jul 17, 2014 00:17

I. M. Gei: Jun 26, 2005; CHIEFS

BITCH

$250,000 - Dr. Gitmo Moneyson receives $250,000 (tax-deductible).

# ? Jul 17, 2014 00:26

Stex T: Mar 7, 2005; Shut the fuck up and get out. Have fun being a slave of the rich and powerful.

$60 - you know, guitars that are like, double guitars

# ? Jul 17, 2014 00:29

SHISHKABOB: Nov 30, 2012; Fun Shoe

Hey real talk where is the link to the kick starter I want to donate.

# ? Jul 17, 2014 00:36

Ultraklystron: May 19, 2010; Unsafe At Every Speed

Rated PG-34 posted:

66,666,666 BTC

Lowtax builds the Pyramid where He and all goons will be entombed following His death.

66,666,667: GOONTOMB in Geostationary Orbit. An SA logo surrounded by goatse will mark the GOONTOMB, and this image will be visible with the naked eye from Earth.

# ? Jul 17, 2014 00:37

dundun: Oct 29, 2005; H E R B

420,000- Will smoke an e-cigarette with "weed" flavor vapor juice to impress friends and piss off your mom.

# ? Jul 17, 2014 00:37

you irl: Jan 22, 2014

$10,000: Blink and marquee bbcode tags
$20,000: "Share on social media" links
$30,000: "Go viral" button

# ? Jul 17, 2014 00:41

Leroy Diplowski: Aug 25, 2005; The Candyman Can

Visit My Candy Shop

And SA Mart Thread

$1992

Bring back LF except LF stands for Lisa Frank. It should have a special Lisa Frank theme like FYAD and posting about anything other than Lisa Frank is gets you banned.

# ? Jul 17, 2014 00:42

you irl: Jan 22, 2014

$50,000: for one day every user renamed to 'gobbledick'

# ? Jul 17, 2014 00:43

Ceyton: Oct 9, 2004; YOU'RE DEAD ARMITAGE!
YOU'RE DEAD ARMITAGE!
YOU'RE DEAD ARMITAGE!

$1,000,069 - bring back DPPH and HITW
$1,002,000 - bring back HD2K
$10,000,000 - bring back BTB
$100,000,000 - bring back HT:MM
$1,000,000,000 - reset the local timeline to 2004 (plat users retain memories)

# ? Jul 17, 2014 00:49

MrAptronym: Jan 4, 2007; "...And then there was Bitcoin."

$2,400,000 - All backers will receive an audiobook recording of Friedrich Nietzsche's Thus Spoke Zarathustra, performed by Shmorky.

$8,675,309 - All current and past members of pop sensation Tommy Tutone given admin accounts. All backers will receive a copy of their hit 1998 release "Tutone.rtf".

# ? Jul 17, 2014 00:50

Missing Name: Jan 5, 2013

$0.54

Lowtax gets an apple pie from McDonald's

# ? Jul 17, 2014 00:51

Spanish Manlove: Aug 31, 2008; HAILGAYSATAN

Dr. Gitmo Moneyson posted:

$1,200,000,000 - Make a new forums admin position called "Forums God-Christ" with special privileges and super-admin powers above those of even Lowtax himself, of which I, Dr. Gitmo Moneyson, shall be the sole holder for all time.

Special privileges and powers of the Forums God-Christ shall include, but not be limited to:
No other user shall ever have any position of authority, privilege, or power above those of the Forums God-Christ at any time, ever.
Complete immunity from all forms of ban and probation, except those approved by the Forums God-Christ Himself.
The ability to take away any and all forms of mod-ship, admin-ship, IK-ship, etc. at any time and for any reason, along with any and all associated powers and privileges.
Whatever the gently caress else I feel like because gently caress yall I'm the KANG!!!!!

goal:

$0.01 and el penis can never post again

# ? Jul 17, 2014 00:52

Luigi Thirty: Apr 30, 2006; Emergency confection port.

$20,140 - update the copyright year at the bottom of the forum pages

# ? Jul 17, 2014 00:53

Captain_Maclaine: Sep 30, 2001; Every moment I'm alive, I pray for death!

$750,000 - full implementation of 3D browsing.

# ? Jul 17, 2014 01:04

wolffenstein: Aug 2, 2002; Pork Pro

$80,000 - Lowtax establishes a virtual Something Awful office in Second Life and inhabits it for at least a week

# ? Jul 17, 2014 01:07

fuccboi: Jan 5, 2004; by zen death robot

Do these things for free Low tax. Don't be cheap. I want my plant.

# ? Jul 17, 2014 01:09

StandardVC10: Feb 6, 2007; This avatar now 50% more dark mode compliant

$1,969,000: All typefaces on the forums are replaced with psychadelic hippie letters

# ? Jul 17, 2014 01:15

Redonionking: Mar 13, 2001; I AM A BRILLIANT HAMOLOGIST; Grimey Drawer

47,128$ - a thing happens with a spork and its wildly hilarious

# ? Jul 17, 2014 01:24

AlphaKeny1: Feb 17, 2006

$10 - a forums account to shitpost with

# ? Jul 17, 2014 01:27

draconic: Mar 30, 2004

i would donate a billion dollars just for the gently caress you button

actually do this. don't tease. this needs to be done

draconic fucked around with this message at 01:32 on Jul 17, 2014

# ? Jul 17, 2014 01:29

LuckyCat: Jul 26, 2007; Grimey Drawer

Stex T posted:

$60 - you know, guitars that are like, double guitars

~~$10 - more rubber stamps~~

$300,00 stretch - Lowtax has to drink nothing but Mangosteen for 3 months

# ? Jul 17, 2014 01:33

spank my snatch: Jun 4, 2009

$42.76 - Backers are framed for a crime, but Leonard Crabs stands as defense counsel, pro bono

# ? Jul 17, 2014 01:40

Throb Robinson: Feb 8, 2010; He would enjoy administering the single antidote to Leia. He would enjoy it very much indeed..

12.50$ Lowtax covers the songs from the Beestmeel Saga

# ? Jul 17, 2014 01:42

homeless snail: Mar 14, 2007

$45 Personal Pan Pizza Party (1 topping only)

# ? Jul 17, 2014 01:46

shipwrek: Dec 11, 2009; Drunk octopus wants
to fight you

$30,000 all mods admit; in public, that they knew.

# ? Jul 17, 2014 01:53

Edgar Allan Pwned: Apr 4, 2011; Quoth the Raven "I love the power glove. It's so bad..."

SHISHKABOB posted:

Hey real talk where is the link to the kick starter I want to donate.

# ? Jul 17, 2014 02:00

flerp: Feb 25, 2014

120000$

Every poster's avatar is replaced with a klurf

# ? Jul 17, 2014 02:01

Phosphene: Aug 11, 2008; I'M NOT TRYING TO GET BIG AND BULKY OKAY WE ALL FAIL DIFFERENT GOALS

82,200$
A thread is opened in which anything can be posted but no one can read any of the replies. A program picks a post at random and replies to a random post in e/n with it once a day.

# ? Jul 17, 2014 02:10

Fermented Tinal: Aug 25, 2005; by Pragmatica

$6,000,000 - Lowtax and Shmorky profess their eternal love for one another and get gay married, with everyone on the forums invited.

# ? Jul 17, 2014 02:13

theres a will theres moe: Jan 10, 2007; Hair Elf

$25,069
Lowtax and Shmorky make a video wherein they bake a pizza from scratch without referring to a recipe and then eat the whole thing while holding hands and looking into one another's eyes.

# ? Jul 17, 2014 02:26

Burt Sexual: Jan 26, 2006; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS; Switchblade Switcharoo

$500,000 untag this thread

# ? Jul 17, 2014 02:29

Edward Mass: Sep 14, 2011; 𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen𝅘𝅥𝅮

$10,000,000 - Ron Paul made Moderator of Debate Disco

# ? Jul 17, 2014 02:39

Cheap Shot: Aug 15, 2006; Help BIP learn gun?

$250,000 - Add front facing cameras to the forums so that users will not have to remove them to travel to the kitchen.

# ? Jul 17, 2014 02:40

Qwerinty: Jul 20, 2006; by zen death robot

$1,500,000,000 - A crack team of mercenaries are sent into Syria to reclaim Caro's body, whereupon it will be brought back to the states and burnt upon a pyre in front of CIA HQ, as he deserves.

# ? Jul 17, 2014 02:44

Jimong5: Oct 3, 2005; If history is to change, let it change! If the world is to be destroyed, so be it! If my fate is to be destroyed... I must simply laugh!!; Grimey Drawer

$20 - Lowtax eat the eggs

# ? Jul 17, 2014 02:44

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# ? Apr 23, 2024 17:55

Vincent Van Goatse: Nov 8, 2006; Enjoy every sandwich.; Smellrose

Spanish Manlove posted:

goal:

$0.01 and el penis can never post again

Where's the kickstarter, wanna pledge for this goal.

# ? Jul 17, 2014 02:49

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > Stretch goals for the SA Forums Kickstarter

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