|
Working out is probably tip number one. Being attractive buys you all sorts of leeway.
|
#
?
Jul 16, 2014 22:49
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 25, 2024 23:18 |
|
|
A cute dreamworks type smile always works.
|
|
#
?
Jul 16, 2014 22:50
|
|
|
Kirk Johnson posted:Working out is probably tip number one. Being attractive buys you all sorts of leeway. ya and if you dont want to work out just get a stand up desk for when youre gooning at home/ at work. ive been pudgy for the past 4 years til i did that now 6 mos later im twinky and unironically get hit on by women again.
|
|
#
?
Jul 16, 2014 23:07
|
|
|
its insane that the use of dating web sites has been normalized instead of rightfully stigmatized
|
|
#
?
Jul 16, 2014 23:17
|
|
|
butplug accident posted:its insane that the use of dating web sites has been normalized instead of rightfully stigmatized Err-one tryna get sum
|
|
#
?
Jul 16, 2014 23:21
|
|
|
psyopmonkey posted:Dont comment on my hair, earrings, tattoos, smell, clothes, shoes, or bag. Find out who this poster is to improve this post 1000%
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 00:09
|
|
|
swamp waste posted:Find out who this poster is to improve this post 1000%
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 00:14
|
|
|
SirEvelynTremble posted:Wear shades. Don't make eye contact. Never smile. Make mean comments about everyone and everything. Sadly this works surprisingly well.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 08:40
|
|
|
butplug accident posted:its insane that the use of dating web sites has been normalized instead of rightfully stigmatized https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iHsuFVkcp1Q
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 09:49
|
|
|
i carved a large slit in my forehead and stuck a sea shell in there i'm a unicorn now instead of a creepy guy and i want everyone to address me as such
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 10:48
|
|
|
here are some top tips for picking up unicorns, since i am now one (a unicorn) be hot and attractive, like i am not be personable and funny, like i am not do not have any mental issues, like myself present yourself in a manner which makes people feel sorry for you before they realise how insufferable you are  
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 10:52
|
|
|
put rohypnol in your own drink, later claim that she raped you and is now bound by god to marry you. alternatively put rohypnol in her drink (don't rape her) take a lot a pictures with her that look like you're having a great time. next morning send her those pic with a messege along the lines of "we had such a great time last night, lests do it again!"
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 11:05
|
|
|
It's taken as read that you will sometimes pop a boner when a chick is grinding on you while dancing. Skip the preliminaries for this (talking to them etc.) by just walking up to attractive women in the bar/club and rubbing your erect dick against their thighs and rear end. Smile while you do it. Kirk Johnson fucked around with this message at 11:28 on Jul 17, 2014 |
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 11:26
|
|
|
naem posted:-be handsomed follow these tips to knock boots
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 11:37
|
|
|
If you got her number, make sure to send 4000+ mails or messages a day. Don't stop, even when she tells you to. Be sure to be rude to her in some of the messages. Buy her gifts and leave them in front of her house. A doll maybe?
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 12:03
|
|
|
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 12:13
|
|
|
Actually did this once and it made my teeth all squeaky and abrasive.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 12:34
|
|
|
Here is how you talk to women: Bring up your mother at least twice. If she reminds you of mom in any way (good or bad), point it out. Repeatedly. Even if she's not as great as your mom (because, really, what other woman could be???) lie and say she is. Mention famous murderers. Has she heard of Henry Howard Holmes? Fascinating man. If she has, she'll be impressed by your knowledge of history. If she hasn't, it's really your duty to educate her. Do NOT touch her with your penis while in public. Do NOT touch your penis while she is watching. I can't stress this enough. Talk about books. Books mean you are sophisticated. Ask her if she's read Game of Thrones. If she has (even if she hasn't) try and steer her towards older fantasy classics. Has she ever read Captive of Gor? She should! Establish dominance early on. If she is not receptive, switch gears and establish subservience. Tell her you've been very rude and inappropriate. Ask her to punish you. Do NOT bring up videogames unless she brings them up first. If she mentions her "Online friends" and the funny things they do in their game, disengage immediately. Do NOT try to bond over your shared love of Warcraft. If she tries to convince you to leave your raid guild and move to her roleplaying server, sever all contact while you still can. If you exchange emails, give her your business email. The one you put on your resume. Don't give her the one that mentions dragons (related tip: get a business email that is basically your name, don't put the dragon one on your resume). If you stalk her, don't be conspicuous. Practice covert stalking - not the sort where you let her see you by design. Women don't think it's romantic at all.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 12:53
|
|
|
ScratchAndSniff posted:One time I was getting onto a plane, but my ticket window seat next to a girl. I knew from experience that if I asked her to move over she would just stand up and ask to be moved, so I just stood there and looked awkward for a while. Oh my god, I think I'm going to cry... I can help, maybe, but we'd need to reboot you or something.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 13:12
|
|
|
 nigga look like Stitch and you *know* that guy be rollin in hawaiian pussay
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 13:14
|
|
|
psyopmonkey posted:Dont comment on my hair, earrings, tattoos, smell, clothes, shoes, or bag. Well aren't you just lovely?
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 13:14
|
|
|
Girl's like animals and nature poo poo. Try to impress them by acting like a cool animal like a tiger or a polar bear. The easiest way to do this is by watching them from a distance. Don't blink or break eye contact. They will think you are an apex predator and get super turned on.
Tricky D fucked around with this message at 13:31 on Jul 17, 2014 |
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 13:18
|
|
|
I've found having a huge cock helps. Especially if it's in your mouth.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 13:30
|
|
|
psyopmonkey posted:Dont comment on my hair, earrings, tattoos, smell, clothes, shoes, or bag. That's fine, you seem rather miserable. I don't think you need to worry about anyone trying to talk to you, much less hit on you.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 13:56
|
|
|
*is a guy who becomes a girl* *is suddenly shocked to discover that men flirt with women*
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 14:04
|
|
|
ashgromnies posted:That's fine, you seem rather miserable. I don't think you need to worry about anyone trying to talk to you, much less hit on you. well to be fair he is a troon so the guys that hit on him could be pretty hosed up!!!
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 14:05
|
|
|
psyopmonkey posted:Dont comment on my hair, earrings, tattoos, smell, clothes, shoes, or bag. ScratchAndSniff posted:Creepy girls (i.e. creepolas) have impossibly high standards.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 14:18
|
|
|
-Find out if you have interests in common, if the anime that she is into is of an inferior type, resist the urge to mock her. -Subtly condition her to your expectations by telling her a story about a friend who paid for dinner for some "loving prick tease" who didn't put out. -Always treat her like a gentleman, open doors for her and take off your hat every time she enters or leaves the room. -If like me, your earwax has a bitter, pungent smell, then avoid picking your ears when she's around. -If she invites you to her house resist the temptation to steal any underwear. If you absolutely must then wait till she goes to the bathroom and listen at the door to make sure she's having a poo, thus allowing ample time for lustful larceny. -If she comes over to your place, throw out all fungal creams or ointments, she doesn't need to find out about that yet. -If you're a mmo gamer you may have a collection of piss bottles or urns around your gaming area, throw these out before she comes over or at least hide them somewhere that she won't find them (trust me on this one, you can say that it's weak lemon drink but all girls know piss when they see it). -Impersonating a 4-legged animal such as a cat or dog can allow you to stealthily exit a room in the unfortunate case of an unexpected boner.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 14:43
|
|
|
Inevitablelongshot posted:-Find out if you have interests in common, if the anime that she is into is of an inferior type, resist the urge to mock her. Dear god...
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 15:03
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 25, 2024 23:18 |
|
|
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2014 15:07
|
|