If you died right now, what would happen?

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > If you died right now, what would happen?

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

People would say, drat he sure wasted a lot of time on the internet. What was he doing online anyway? (They never understood me and my important post contributions :qq:

)

and then Elton John would sing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A8gO0Z818j4

if he's not available, then Iggy Azalea

edit- I also should mention that I would definitely poo poo myself.

Juanito fucked around with this message at 01:46 on Jul 19, 2014

# ¿ Jul 19, 2014 00:42

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ Apr 29, 2024 17:28

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

I'm planning on pooping before I die so there is less clean up.

might be easier to just wear diapers from now on though

# ¿ Jul 19, 2014 00:54

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

Das Boo posted:

I'd freak out a German guy and wouldn't get to eat my currywurst.

I'm confused, is currywurst what you call the German guy's dick?

# ¿ Jul 19, 2014 01:57

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

Don Tacorleone posted:

Juanito, can't you stop thinking about German Guy Dick for even ONE minute of the day?

Not until the next World Cup

# ¿ Jul 19, 2014 02:00

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

THS posted:

when i die it will ruin the lives of everyone i know. friends and family will be traumatized and grief stricken for years and everytime they start to feel happy, like they can move on with their lives, they will immediately think of my tragic death and their hearts will sink again. my loved ones will start to commit suicide in a chain reaction until millions are left dead by their own hands in my wake

lol

# ¿ Jul 19, 2014 04:20

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

Dely Apple posted:

I would leave behind the eternal mystery of why I have this picture bookmarked in Chrome

The answer though is I misclicked somehow and for ages I have been too lazy to just delete it and now it's tradition

I bookmarked it.

I like this idea of some completely random poo poo that would be found..

# ¿ Jul 19, 2014 05:17

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

0dB posted:

Already dead, looks much the same really.

RIP

# ¿ Jul 19, 2014 14:58

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

Palpek posted:

i have a couple twitter bots set specifically for such occasion

good idea, I should set something up to post for me.. things like "not really dead. i'll be in touch"

# ¿ Jul 19, 2014 19:00

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

A misanthrope posted:

the death cuck is harsh, but thankfully the dead no longer care

ya glad I'll be dead for it

# ¿ Jul 19, 2014 20:47

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

I.C. posted:

I think about death a lot!

I wrote an epitaph last night, but it's on my phone...and the batteries died (coincidence?), and even through it's short I'm too stupid to remember it.

If I died now...definitely by Tuesday someone would notice, but since it's Texas and hot, I'd be even grosser than I am currently alive.

People with cats, myself included, all say we don't want our cats to eat us, but if I'm already dead and the cat is hungry...I mean, one dead body is enough, right?

I have a will and my next of kin are aware of its presence and location. I think it'd be a bummer if I died because I'd be leaving behind a lot of clutter and junk (clothes, books, papers, tapes) to go through, plus a small offsite storage unit filled with the same.

On the plus side I have money in different banks, so that'd probably make them feel better. Probably not enough to buy anyone a house around here, but elsewhere, sure.

BUT

I don't know will happen when I die, and I'm scared about it...because it's coming soon for me.

e: I got so excited talking about DEATH I made some errors

I'd like to see your epitaph

# ¿ Jul 21, 2014 00:36

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

I.C. posted:

My phone is still charging. I'm going to take a shower and assuming I don't fall and die in there, after you'll see.

Here lies poster I.C.
She meant something, but not to me
Now she's gone and doesn't know
We sold her stuff fer a ton a blow.

(There were other rhymes in the first 2 lines, but you get it.)

# ¿ Jul 21, 2014 01:19

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

I hope Iggy Koopa never dies, my favorite IK

# ¿ Jul 21, 2014 01:19

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

redshirt posted:

We could all die at any moment, guys.

I'm scared.

Naw man it ain't like that

# ¿ Jul 21, 2014 04:20

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

redshirt posted:

How is it not exactly like that?

I'm going to live foreverrrrrrr

# ¿ Jul 21, 2014 04:33

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

you guys are bringing this upbeat thread about death down guys.

# ¿ Jul 21, 2014 04:37

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

redshirt posted:

I mean this is all hypothetical, of course.

Like any of us will ever die?!

LOL HAHAHAHA

Hehehehehe its all good

# ¿ Jul 21, 2014 04:43

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

best snipe I've ever seen

# ¿ Jul 21, 2014 04:45

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

A misanthrope posted:

snipe so good it almost makes me not wanna die

almost

Don't die

# ¿ Jul 21, 2014 04:49

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

A misanthrope posted:

aww thanks guys

ok i won't die (at least not right now unless my brain veins explode unexpectedly)

so that's all it takes? your blood vein does a little fart and that's it

# ¿ Jul 21, 2014 05:12

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

A misanthrope posted:

fatal in like 40% of cases and it can kill you like you got shot in the brain - just drop like your switch was flipped

people who survive are usually brain damaged

add that to my list of things I wish I didn't know

# ¿ Jul 21, 2014 05:22

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

Doctor Dogballs posted:

My dumb ex would get a lot of money.

Update your wills, people!

How can I make sure my wife doesn't get any of my money

# ¿ Jul 21, 2014 16:13

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

Drunk & Ugly posted:

i am feeling very fragile now because of this talk even though i constantly think abou tdeath i come on here to not think about it and then these goons gotta get existential and now im just, im just not feeling good about anything i think ill go for a walk but il probably DIE getting hit by a car or something thanks death thread

# ¿ Jul 21, 2014 16:59

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

Professor Shark posted:

Everything would cease to exist because I'm certain that you are all a figment of my imagination and I'm the God of my own reality!

Better keep me alive, people!

If I'm a figment of your imagination then why can't you edit my post?

# ¿ Jul 22, 2014 02:26

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

A misanthrope posted:

then your imagination sucks because i suck

no misanthrope you dont' suck

# ¿ Jul 23, 2014 00:56

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ Apr 29, 2024 17:28

Juanito: Jan 20, 2004; I wasn't paying attention
to what you just said.

Can you repeat yourself
in a more interesting way?; Hell Gem

a bone to pick posted:

When I die- gently caress it, I hope I go to hell; cuz I'm a piece of poo poo and it aint hard to fuckin' tell.

I had to google this because I thought it might be juggalo lyrics

# ¿ Jul 23, 2014 02:41

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > If you died right now, what would happen?