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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clerical_celibacy_(Catholic_Church)#Theological_and_scriptural_foundations i think they might
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 07:23 |
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# ? Mar 19, 2024 09:20 |
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****I dont believe this, but i got chill bumps
. A SCARY WAY TO BREAK UP!!!!! DO NOT stop reading this or something bad will happen!!!!!!!! One day, Sarah was walking home from school when her boyfriend drove by and honked at her to get in. She got in his car and he drove her to the lake. Her boyfriend said he was going to tell her something very important. Sarah could have sworn he was going to propose. However, he flicked her off, pushed her in the lake and yelled, I am breaking up with you, you awful .!! I hate you and I think that maybe you should just end your .. life! DUMB ..!!! He laughed and drove off. It was a very cold day. Sarah climbed out of the lake, freezing cold, and feeling the worst she had in her entire life. She got home went in a hot bath, and slit her wrists and died in the bathtub. Her parents yelled and screamed at her to get out until they finally broke the door down. They saw no body, but the entire bathroom was dripping with her blood. Her mom went insane and killed herself three days later, her dad is in prison, accused of murder. Later that week, Sarahs exboyfriend was taking a shower when she came from the drain, rotting and bloody, with a razor in her hand and said Goodbye Jason. She cut his throat before he could scream. If you do not repost this with the title 1 scary way to break up, you are a heartless ..and Sarah come to you in the shower from the drain, and will kill you the same way she killed her boyfriend. 24 ppl have broken this chain and died You have 13 minutes
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 07:24 |
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1 scary way to break up
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 07:25 |
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Dolphin posted:1 scary way to break up girlfriends hate it!
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 07:27 |
hot
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 07:27 |
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If the father fucks the son is that incest or masturbation?
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 07:27 |
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drilldo squirt posted:If the father fucks the son is that incest or masturbation? he's getting cucked
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 07:28 |
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gay for god
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 07:28 |
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Nalk posted:he's getting cucked Can God cuck himself with getting caught?
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 07:30 |
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Can God create an orgy so awkward that even he says "naw, man, I gotta go"?
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 07:34 |
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drilldo squirt posted:Can God cuck himself with getting caught? god loves getting caught
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 07:35 |
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jerkoffs for jesus
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 08:43 |
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"Which Friends character are you most like?" I ask my date. I'm a witty guy who uses humour as a disarming mechanism (and, some might say, as a tool to masking my crippling insecurity), so I'd most likely be Chandler. But I'm smart like a scientist, so I could also be Ross. Finally, I'm klutzy and adorable--just like a Golden Retriever--so there are certainly hints of Joey inside of me. "I'm basically Chandler, Ross, and Joey." I loudly proclaim this fact, because confidence is an aphrodisiac. Every six months, Staples performs an employee review on me and gives me anywhere between a $0.30 and $0.50 raise. This last review, my "upsells" were so high that the manager bumped me up $0.65. The trick is to target older customers and mislead them on their purchases. Thus, it only took me seven weeks to afford a pair of Toto elevator shoes, which added five more inches to my height. The problem is that the shoes don't do much once you sit down, so I've also been growing my hair out and using Axe molding clay to stand it straight up, which adds several more inches. All-in-all, I'm pretty close to my goal of adding another foot to my height. Women love it. "These are really great breadsticks," I complement the breadsticks. I keep eating them because, hey, free food. "Nom nom nom...hah!" She doesn't get it. Actually, I can't help but notice that my date sits a little straighter (and therefore higher) than me. As I try to fit an entire breadstick into my mouth and chew it without also biting my tongue, I carefully eyeball the top of her head. She follows my eyes and touches her hair. "What?" she asks. I squint and chew harder. Louder. Faster. I lean in. She smells like...cinnamon? No, nutmeg. It's hard to tell. My nose is stuffed up so I have to keep my mouth open while I chew. I suddenly imagine the ball of bread rolling around in my mouth like a load of dirty laundry and it makes me want to throw up. "I'll be right back," I jump up from my seat and jog to the restroom. When I get there, inspiration strikes me like a bolt of divine lightning. "Eureka!" I start balling up paper towels and stuffing them into the back of my pants--I think I fit half of a roll down there. Then I waddle back to the table and quietly take a seat. She looks mildly shocked. Or perturbed? I don't know, women are hard to read. "Are you...are you alright?" she asks. "Who? Me? Yeah. Of course." My rear end crunches softly on stiff brown paper towels while I use her forehead as a ruler and try to estimate the height that they have added to my position. Maybe an inch--not bad, not bad. I lean forward. "Do you think there's a difference between, like...anime and manga?" Suddenly a sharp pain hits my stomach. The breadsticks. They're interacting with the pot of lukewarm coffee I drank earlier. I wince as I feel a burning sensation running through my intestines like a G-scale model train. An "uh oh..." escapes my lips before I can stop it at the proverbial gates. I don't think I'm going to make it to the bathroom. But the paper towels. "...spaghettiooooos..." I force a smile. I imagine a beleaguered General Adama facing down a whole Cylon army with nothing but a handful of fighters and flak guns. He meditates on the coming battle before finally saying, Alright, here goes nothing, Colonel Tigh. I close my eyes, hesitantly relax my rear end, and immediately feel a warm burbling rise up between my legs, just like I sat down in a pool of sun-baked mud or bread dough. The sensation persists for what feels like an eternity--the duration of which I am entirely silent. When it ends--mercifully--I let out a soft sigh. When I open my eyes, I realize something very strange: I have risen another inch or so and am now looking slightly downward at my date. It is the most shocking and beautiful thing I could ever conceive of. They say, "When god closes a door, he opens a window." I don't believe in god, but if I did, I'd swear he was with me that day.
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 09:00 |
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naem posted:"Which Friends character are you most like?" I ask my date. I'm a witty guy who uses humour as a disarming mechanism (and, some might say, as a tool to masking my crippling insecurity), so I'd most likely be Chandler. But I'm smart like a scientist, so I could also be Ross. Finally, I'm klutzy and adorable--just like a Golden Retriever--so there are certainly hints of Joey inside of me. "I'm basically Chandler, Ross, and Joey." I loudly proclaim this fact, because confidence is an aphrodisiac.
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 09:04 |
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9goats dead posted:****I dont believe this, but i got chill bumps . stay safe poverty ghost
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 10:23 |
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The cross is just a dildo with a handle if u think about it
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 10:26 |
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 11:01 |
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Just with the son
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 16:46 |
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gently caress me sexy ghost twins
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 16:49 |
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gently caress ME SEXY GHOST TWINS
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 16:52 |
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no just with altar boys
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 17:04 |
naem posted:"Which Friends character are you most like?" I ask my date. I'm a witty guy who uses humour as a disarming mechanism (and, some might say, as a tool to masking my crippling insecurity), so I'd most likely be Chandler. But I'm smart like a scientist, so I could also be Ross. Finally, I'm klutzy and adorable--just like a Golden Retriever--so there are certainly hints of Joey inside of me. "I'm basically Chandler, Ross, and Joey." I loudly proclaim this fact, because confidence is an aphrodisiac. God is my Friend.
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 17:11 |
gently caress Me Sexy Ghost Twins
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 17:12 |
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stay safe sexy poverty gently caress twins
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 17:22 |
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Smoking Crow posted:gently caress me sexy ghost twins
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 17:24 |
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idk but they're all cannibals
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 17:26 |
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DUNCAN DONUTS posted:gently caress ME SEXY GHOST TWINS
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# ? Jul 23, 2014 17:27 |
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Stay sexy, gently caress Me Ghost Twins.
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# ? Jul 24, 2014 07:04 |
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gently caress me sexy ghost twins
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# ? Jul 24, 2014 07:07 |
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^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ you are all idiot fuckers and i hate you
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# ? Jul 24, 2014 07:29 |
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this is a dumb 0 content meme circlejerk and i hope it is gassed thanks for reading
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# ? Jul 24, 2014 07:36 |
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gently caress me sexy ghost twins
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# ? Jul 24, 2014 07:40 |
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1 scary way to break up, gently caress me sexy ghost twins
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# ? Jul 24, 2014 08:23 |
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gently caress you fugly ghost twins
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# ? Jul 24, 2014 09:16 |
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# ? Jul 24, 2014 09:20 |
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# ? Mar 19, 2024 09:20 |
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stay safe concussion ghost
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# ? Jul 24, 2014 09:20 |