Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Locked thread
Homestar Runner
Oct 9, 2012

This is the best videogame
I have ever played!

Kyrie eleison posted:

yay for jesus


yeah that's great and all except for the part where you take the NT as some kinda historicised biographical account of Mr Jesus which it is verifiably not

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Kyrie eleison
Jan 26, 2013

by Ralp

Homestar Runner posted:

yeah that's great and all except for the part where you take the NT as some kinda historicised biographical account of Mr Jesus which it is verifiably not

it isn't "verifiably not", but honestly i don't see how it's relevant, one's affinity for the celebrated biblical character of jesus is not really dependent on its precise actuality.

jesus is the focal point of human history. we date our calendars by him, and he permeates all of western art. how you relate to him is extremely indicative of how you relate to humanity itself. it is safe to say that studying him is a serious issue, and a requirement of being educated. many don't care to be educated, and prefer to stay aloof from serious issues, i regard this as a sort of laziness or stupidity.

as a personal challenge to anyone who wants to have an opinion about jesus, especially a disparaging one, try cracking your bible to matthew and reading it from beginning to end, it's not that long. if you've already read it and want to get mad at me for suggesting you haven't, just realize that lots of people have not and they form their opinions on jesus based on periphery rather than source material.

Pththya-lyi
Nov 8, 2009

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2020
At some indeterminate point in the future, the true believers will receive perfected bodies and live forever in harmony and peace while the unworthy suffer and die.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Technological_singularity

SirEvelynTremble
Dec 25, 2013

FUCK YOU HITLER
STALINGRAD
ROFLMFAO

Kyrie eleison posted:

it isn't "verifiably not", but honestly i don't see how it's relevant, one's affinity for the celebrated biblical character of jesus is not really dependent on its precise actuality.

jesus is the focal point of human history. we date our calendars by him, and he permeates all of western art. how you relate to him is extremely indicative of how you relate to humanity itself. it is safe to say that studying him is a serious issue, and a requirement of being educated. many don't care to be educated, and prefer to stay aloof from serious issues, i regard this as a sort of laziness or stupidity.

as a personal challenge to anyone who wants to have an opinion about jesus, especially a disparaging one, try cracking your bible to matthew and reading it from beginning to end, it's not that long. if you've already read it and want to get mad at me for suggesting you haven't, just realize that lots of people have not and they form their opinions on jesus based on periphery rather than source material.

I like your long(ish) posts.

I think Jesus is an important figure who, whether existed or not, stands as a great master of wisdom, ethics and character, who stood up against Pharisee hypocrisy, helped the poor, championed the outcasts and talked to multitudes about deep issues.

Unlike Buddha, Jesus wasn't brought up as Royalty, have a wife & kids who he later abandoned to find himself, or sat on his arse for 3 yrs under a tree.

Jesus is a good rolemodel all I'm saying. (So is Superman, Batman, Spiderman and Captain America etc)

ashgromnies
Jun 19, 2004

Big Beef City posted:

oppressing social others to the benefit of their own group/class/organization


Yes if they wear their atheism on their sleeves, get righteous about it, and oppress others.



I'm kidding mostly, since this is GBS and also because in the specific sense I was using it, I meant 'religious' to be those involved in the positive belief of a deity as defined by recognized and/or organized societal structures often referred to as 'religious' as opposed to the disbelief in any higher power.

edit: 'oppress' is a strong word, and I'm sorry if that offends. 'Denigrate' is probably better.

so religion for you involves belief in creator deities and higher powers, so buddhism, taoism, confucianism, traditional Brahmic hinduism, some new age bs, and Unitarian Universalism aren't religions

my definition of religion is "a combination of philosophical reasoning and claims on the nature of human worldly unhappiness actualized through a set of beliefs for how to see your place in the universe and how to behave" -- basically something which purports to be a salve for the unhappy stinging of life

but something-something control/oppress/denigrate too I gues

Mad Lupine
Feb 18, 2011

all the things you said
running through my head

SirEvelynTremble posted:

I like your long(ish) posts.

I think Jesus is an important figure who, whether existed or not, stands as a great master of wisdom, ethics and character, who stood up against Pharisee hypocrisy, helped the poor, championed the outcasts and talked to multitudes about deep issues.

Unlike Buddha, Jesus wasn't brought up as Royalty, have a wife & kids who he later abandoned to find himself, or sat on his arse for 3 yrs under a tree.

Jesus is a good rolemodel all I'm saying. (So is Superman, Batman, Spiderman and Captain America etc)

I dunno, superman never said he'd burn someone in hell for not believing. Also, Jesus never got laid so that's another strike.

ashgromnies
Jun 19, 2004

SirEvelynTremble posted:

I like your long(ish) posts.

I think Jesus is an important figure who, whether existed or not, stands as a great master of wisdom, ethics and character, who stood up against Pharisee hypocrisy, helped the poor, championed the outcasts and talked to multitudes about deep issues.

Unlike Buddha, Jesus wasn't brought up as Royalty, have a wife & kids who he later abandoned to find himself, or sat on his arse for 3 yrs under a tree.

Jesus is a good rolemodel all I'm saying. (So is Superman, Batman, Spiderman and Captain America etc)

so buddha's life was more relatable and human whereas jesus' was inherently different cuz he's the son of frickin' god and literally perfect or whatever

hmmm think I'll go with the more realistic one

quakster
Jul 21, 2007

by FactsAreUseless
jonathan joestar died for our sins

Smoking Crow
Feb 14, 2012

*laughs at u*

Homestar Runner posted:

yeah that's great and all except for the part where you take the NT as some kinda historicised biographical account of Mr Jesus which it is verifiably not

There are no "true biographical accounts" of anyone of the ancient period even well trusted sources like Tacitus and Thucydides were incredibly biased and mostly based on hearsay

Izumi Konata
May 4, 2012

by Ralp

Kyrie eleison posted:

it isn't "verifiably not", but honestly i don't see how it's relevant, one's affinity for the celebrated biblical character of jesus is not really dependent on its precise actuality.

jesus is the focal point of human history. we date our calendars by him, and he permeates all of western art. how you relate to him is extremely indicative of how you relate to humanity itself. it is safe to say that studying him is a serious issue, and a requirement of being educated. many don't care to be educated, and prefer to stay aloof from serious issues, i regard this as a sort of laziness or stupidity.

as a personal challenge to anyone who wants to have an opinion about jesus, especially a disparaging one, try cracking your bible to matthew and reading it from beginning to end, it's not that long. if you've already read it and want to get mad at me for suggesting you haven't, just realize that lots of people have not and they form their opinions on jesus based on periphery rather than source material.

he is a proxy within a walled garden through whom the kingdom of heaven may be accessed, but does this mean u must log in as a guest, or by using his credentials?

can i borrow some money? i am slowly dying and am stuck in the deep south.

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

Reporting for shovel mission Sir.
I believe the children are literally the future,
and we should teach them well, and let them lead the way.

Without Jesus. Or any Gods or Religion.

All we need is SCIENCE. Our new covenant.

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless
i'm going to get a robot body and live for hundreds of years

Izumi Konata
May 4, 2012

by Ralp

redshirt posted:

I believe the children are literally the future,
and we should teach them well, and let them lead the way.

Without Jesus. Or any Gods or Religion.

All we need is SCIENCE. Our new covenant.

prescience requires conscience. science's vernacular is deeply rooted in biblical terms. u never read the treatise of which u reference, dumbass.

BUSH 2112
Sep 17, 2012

I lie awake, staring out at the bleakness of Megadon.

Big Beef City posted:

I feel like self-described atheists often don't understand the shades of atheistic thought and how to describe themselves. For example, by learning more about atheism I discovered I should more accurately describe myself as an 'agnostic atheist', simply because I can't discount that somewhere, some entity could have what we consider 'god-like' abilities, even though no evidence points to this fact at this time.

This is much how I feel about religious people who do not educate themselves on religion and its purpose, or who harbor thoughts like "There's an unseen probably benevolent force that definitely exists that I have no proof of to offer, yet believe in it anyway because I'm terrified of what it would mean if it did not and feel comforted by my ignorant and purposefully blinding faith that it does."

hth

sorry dude, religion is retarded poo poo for loving faggots who should be burned alive

hth

Izumi Konata
May 4, 2012

by Ralp

BUSH 2112 posted:

sorry dude, religion is retarded poo poo for loving faggots who should be burned alive

hth

i liek your beef, is it veal?

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

Reporting for shovel mission Sir.

Izumi Konata posted:

prescience requires conscience. science's vernacular is deeply rooted in biblical terms. u never read the treatise of which u reference, dumbass.

Burn all religious treatises. Only peer reviewed science journals are allowed now.

Izumi Konata
May 4, 2012

by Ralp

redshirt posted:

Burn all religious treatises. Only peer reviewed science journals are allowed now.

gods gonna get really mad because science has been corrupted and openly provokes his fury. please stop!!!

Izumi Konata
May 4, 2012

by Ralp
e: oops, forgot thread title. nice one :)

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

Reporting for shovel mission Sir.

Izumi Konata posted:

gods gonna get really mad because science has been corrupted and openly provokes his fury. please stop!!!

Priests are replaced with Professors. A glorious human future - and this is demonstrably, provably true. Science literally delivers poo poo like the Internet.

That's a real god to worship.

Kyrie eleison
Jan 26, 2013

by Ralp

Izumi Konata posted:

can i borrow some money? i am slowly dying and am stuck in the deep south.

you know where to find me, friend

Vince MechMahon
Jan 1, 2008



You know, if he came back, I'd probably gently caress Jesus. Just to say I did it, you know?

Kyrie eleison
Jan 26, 2013

by Ralp

TheJoker138 posted:

You know, if he came back, I'd probably gently caress Jesus. Just to say I did it, you know?

if he came back you would cower and beg for mercy

ilikedirt
Oct 15, 2004

king of posting
idf jesus came back ide let him cum on my back lmao!!!!

ilikedirt
Oct 15, 2004

king of posting

Kyrie eleison posted:

if he came back you would cower and beg for mercy

ide get down on my knees thays for sure!!!!!

Vince MechMahon
Jan 1, 2008



Kyrie eleison posted:

if he came back you would cower and beg for mercy

Maybe after he was done, sure. But it would be like a 50 Shades kind of thing where I wasn't REALLY asking for mercy, you know?

emTme3
Nov 7, 2012

by Hand Knit

Kyrie eleison posted:

if he came back you would cower and beg for mercy

if the idiotic mythology that other people made up about him is actually true and he does 'come back', i would do my very best to beat the everloving poo poo out of him, not because of anything personal just because his dad is, you know, a crazed sociopath! in fact, if some version Christianity turns out to be right, i would deliberately choose to go to hell out of protest. and of course, boredom - cuz if heaven is actually full of christians who lucked out on gods binary 'belief' test for good and evil, i'd be jumping down to hell the first chance i got.

also i'd do it while hailing satan because satan is some hilarious poo poo to scare babys. also i was raised very heavily protestant, i guess that fucks up your evil scale for atheists a bit.

now i get to watch my family slowly drive themselves batshit insane with their bronze age dualisms. oh yeah, and of course, kill themselves with 'alternative' medicine, because it turns out that if you just accept what everyone around you says about the world, you're never going to learn how to think for yourself! my sisters think that 'natural' and 'artificial' are actual categories that exist. they also think everything artificial is bad. thus, they are eschewing medicine entirely, having their children as teenagers outside of hospitals and refusing to vaccinate them - all because my parents trained them to fearfully cling to beliefs above all else.

so, after my nieces and nephews start dying from preventable diseases, is jesus finally gonna get around to coming back? because that's about the time i'm gonna want to stuff his tiny beta dick right back up his jew boy oval office

emTme3 fucked around with this message at 09:19 on Jul 25, 2014

Kyrie eleison
Jan 26, 2013

by Ralp

splifyphus posted:

if the idiotic mythology that other people made up about him is actually true and he does 'come back', i would do my very best to beat the everloving poo poo out of him, not because of anything personal just because his dad is, you know, a crazed sociopath! in fact, if some version Christianity turns out to be right, i would deliberately choose to go to hell out of protest. and of course, boredom - cuz if heaven is actually full of christians who lucked out on gods binary 'belief' test for good and evil, i'd be jumping down to hell the first chance i got.

well at least you admit it.

quote:

also i'd do it while hailing satan because satan is some hilarious poo poo to scare babys. also i was raised very heavily protestant, i guess that fucks up your evil scale for atheists a bit.

how? you're a satan hailer not a jesus respecter.

quote:

now i get to watch my family slowly drive themselves batshit insane with their bronze age dualisms. oh yeah, and of course, kill themselves with 'alternative' medicine, because it turns out that if you just accept what everyone around you says about the world, you're never going to learn how to think for yourself! my sisters think that 'natural' and 'artificial' are actual categories that exist. they also think everything artificial is bad. thus, they are eschewing medicine entirely, having their children as teenagers outside of hospitals and refusing to vaccinate them - all because my parents trained them to fearfully cling to beliefs about all else.

so, after my nieces and nephews start dying from preventable diseases, is jesus finally gonna get around to coming back? because that's about the time i'm gonna want to stuff his tiny beta dick right back up his jew boy oval office

this has what to do with christianity?

Tonetta
Jul 9, 2013

look mother look at ME MOTHER MOTHER I AM A HOMESTIXK NOW

**methodically removes and eats own clothes*

Kyrie eleison posted:

well at least you admit it.


how? you're a satan hailer not a jesus respecter.


this has what to do with christianity?

Im gonna kikl jesus again

Tonetta
Jul 9, 2013

look mother look at ME MOTHER MOTHER I AM A HOMESTIXK NOW

**methodically removes and eats own clothes*
After I make him suck my mutant cock and defile his asspussy

emTme3
Nov 7, 2012

by Hand Knit

Kyrie eleison posted:

well at least you admit it.

this makes me so loving sad. ever notice how your brain now spends all the time it used to spend agonizing over god's existence or lack thereof and instead, filing everything into 'good' and 'evil' folders? feels good right? feels safe? makes all the fear and angst go away? hmmmmhmm. congrats on switching one sub-optimal mental cycle into one that will literally block you off from half of the universe for the rest of your life.

quote:

how? you're a satan hailer not a jesus respecter.

i own multiple bible versions and read them frequently. jesus seems like a pretty cool guy but everything we have about him islike 10th-hand, written decades after his death. which means putting him at the center of your worldview bafflingly myopic (i'm being facetious of course, it's usually the result of fear, conditioning and peer pressure) also he never actually says he's the son of god, which is loving hilarious considering the idolatrous deity he's morphed into now. hail satan.

quote:

this has what to do with christianity?

remember those good and evil things that you're so obsessed with now? those black and white categories are byproducts of our psychology and in my experience vanish completely if you play close enough attention to reality. christianity is an ancient thought pattern though, and when it spawned most people in that part of the world still thought this way. turns out that once a human brain starts spinnning a certain way though, it's very painful and time consuming to make it spin any different.

hence my family in tyool 2014: music after 1960? satan. women wearing pants? satan? sexual bonding of any kind without specific (and permanent, and binding) public social customs? satan. women with short hair? satan. gays? satan. science? satan. medicine? satan. the same tired mental lever, swishing all the things in the the good basket or the evil basket. i'm getting exhausted just thinking about it. it's a toxic and avoidable mental construct that will infect every aspect of your life and bring you untold suffering if you're not careful.

statistics show that most people who are raised christian, dabble with unbelief as young adults, and then return to christianity do not actually check out the rest of humanity's religious and philosophical traditions with an open heart or mind, instead mostly consulting with family, friends and former congregation members. if your inner search was similarly one-sided, deep down inside you know there's a very real possibility you could be wrong. do yourself a favor and do some reading anime jesus man, christianity is to religion what coldplay is to music.

or maybe mcdonalds:food?

hmmmmmmmmmm harry potter:literature

check out my Youtube
May 26, 2006

Satan's on my side
and you wanna brawl?
When the Devil comes
you better heed his Quall
who loving cares if any gods are real or not? even if someone had absolute undeniable proof their particular god(s) are real i'm gonna wake up tomorrow and the world will still sucks exactly as much and people are still going to die needlessly painful deaths from easily preventable diseases and starve to death when there is more than enough food and clean water for everyone. because of or in spite of your god a bunch of palestinian kids are going to get murdered by israelis for no reason, or any other of the uncountably numerous terrible fates suffered by the good and the innocent every single day in existence.

Homestar Runner
Oct 9, 2012

This is the best videogame
I have ever played!

Kyrie eleison posted:

try cracking your bible to matthew and blah blah blah, blah blah... lots of people have not and they form their opinions on jesus based on periphery rather than source material.

I AM ENLIGHTENED. I SHALL GO TO THE UNSOURCED SOURCE MATERAL

Tonetta
Jul 9, 2013

look mother look at ME MOTHER MOTHER I AM A HOMESTIXK NOW

**methodically removes and eats own clothes*

Kyrie eleison posted:

it isn't "verifiably not", but honestly i don't see how it's relevant, one's affinity for the celebrated biblical character of jesus is not really dependent on its precise actuality.

jesus is the focal point of human history. we date our calendars by him, and he permeates all of western art. how you relate to him is extremely indicative of how you relate to humanity itself. it is safe to say that studying him is a serious issue, and a requirement of being educated. many don't care to be educated, and prefer to stay aloof from serious issues, i regard this as a sort of laziness or stupidity.

as a personal challenge to anyone who wants to have an opinion about jesus, especially a disparaging one, try cracking your bible to matthew and reading it from beginning to end, it's not that long. if you've already read it and want to get mad at me for suggesting you haven't, just realize that lots of people have not and they form their opinions on jesus based on periphery rather than source material.

I would call you a retard anime fag but I think we went over this very thoroughly in the other thread

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

Reporting for shovel mission Sir.
Kyrie tells us Jesus is the most important person in history.

Unsourced, untested, and an unverified OPINION.

KNOW FREEDOM
LEARN SCIENCE

PenguinBob
Oct 12, 2000
we're going to all die and stay dead forever.

pop fly to McGillicutty
Feb 2, 2004

A peckish little mouse!
Things I actually believe:
We only live once

We should try to positively impact our world for future generations

We are destroying our home

We should care about people even if they don't agree with you

We should focus on love and not hate


Jk HAIL SATAN

SWG_NorCal
Nov 4, 2013
I bought the Oxford Bible and their commentary after reading the bible questions thread in the Ask/Tell forum. It is a very fascinating book. It is amazing to think that people have been turning to this book for many centuries for inspiration, comfort etc. It speaks to a different part of the mind then that of pure science. Religion speaks to the non rational portion of the mind, the part that can be inspired by miracles, thinks that giants stained glass windows are beautiful, that are happy to think that they have a place in the universe. Kind of the difference between a silver one piece suit and a velvety robe.

Kyrie eleison
Jan 26, 2013

by Ralp

splifyphus posted:

this makes me so loving sad. ever notice how your brain now spends all the time it used to spend agonizing over god's existence or lack thereof and instead, filing everything into 'good' and 'evil' folders? feels good right? feels safe? makes all the fear and angst go away? hmmmmhmm. congrats on switching one sub-optimal mental cycle into one that will literally block you off from half of the universe for the rest of your life.


i own multiple bible versions and read them frequently. jesus seems like a pretty cool guy but everything we have about him islike 10th-hand, written decades after his death. which means putting him at the center of your worldview bafflingly myopic (i'm being facetious of course, it's usually the result of fear, conditioning and peer pressure) also he never actually says he's the son of god, which is loving hilarious considering the idolatrous deity he's morphed into now. hail satan.


remember those good and evil things that you're so obsessed with now? those black and white categories are byproducts of our psychology and in my experience vanish completely if you play close enough attention to reality. christianity is an ancient thought pattern though, and when it spawned most people in that part of the world still thought this way. turns out that once a human brain starts spinnning a certain way though, it's very painful and time consuming to make it spin any different.

hence my family in tyool 2014: music after 1960? satan. women wearing pants? satan? sexual bonding of any kind without specific (and permanent, and binding) public social customs? satan. women with short hair? satan. gays? satan. science? satan. medicine? satan. the same tired mental lever, swishing all the things in the the good basket or the evil basket. i'm getting exhausted just thinking about it. it's a toxic and avoidable mental construct that will infect every aspect of your life and bring you untold suffering if you're not careful.

statistics show that most people who are raised christian, dabble with unbelief as young adults, and then return to christianity do not actually check out the rest of humanity's religious and philosophical traditions with an open heart or mind, instead mostly consulting with family, friends and former congregation members. if your inner search was similarly one-sided, deep down inside you know there's a very real possibility you could be wrong. do yourself a favor and do some reading anime jesus man, christianity is to religion what coldplay is to music.

or maybe mcdonalds:food?

hmmmmmmmmmm harry potter:literature

you're making lots of assumptions about me that aren't really true. you think you know how my mind works? you think you know how much reading i've done? you think you know what my spiritual search has been like? you should treat me as an individual rather than a representative of all the things you dislike about your family. i am sorry that your family is so closed-minded, but i don't think the problem is jesus christ, per se. i think you could use his words to influence them positively, if you so chose. for one thing, traditional teaching does not reject medicine, science, hair styles, or music after 1960, so these are clearly not inspired by christianity, but another social influence that is perhaps masquerading as christianity. by embracing satan, as you do, you only give credence to their beliefs. nobody benefits by this approach.

anyway, i'm glad you say you still like jesus a bit after all. for the record, the gospels do contain claims to divinity, most bluntly in john 10:30. i do not consider christianity the mcdonalds of food, christianity is filet mignon, the real deal, there is no religious experience like it.

Cardiovorax
Jun 5, 2011

I mean, if you're a successful actress and you go out of the house in a skirt and without underwear, knowing that paparazzi are just waiting for opportunities like this and that it has happened many times before, then there's really nobody you can blame for it but yourself.
god just shut up already

SWG_NorCal posted:

It is amazing to think that people have been turning to this book for many centuries for inspiration, comfort etc.
I really is, because I have absolutely no idea what's comforting about any of it, except maybe for a few verses from the new testament.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Ball Cupper
Sep 10, 2011

~beautiful in my own way~
You're a shitbird and a massive sperg. I'm glorious. Peace out

  • Locked thread