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Color Printer
May 9, 2011

You get used to it. I don't
even see the code. All I see
is Ipecac, Scapular, Polyphemus...


nine-gear crow posted:

Lynne Thigpen will always be the head of ACME to me. Thank you so very much for that. That was beautiful. :3:

So that's who that actress was! I recognized the Chief and her voice from Where in Time came through clear as a loving bell. Amazing. :allears:

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grandalt
Feb 26, 2013

I didn't fight through two wars to rule
I fought for the future of the world

And the right to have hot tea whenever I wanted
That's perfect for the chief. If you don't go with a head on the screen, you go for the black lady with a plan.

And Hale, guess what? If you grab enough of her people, Carmen is going to have to do the crime herself, and then you could get her. Just follow the rules, and it won't matter how much money Carmen has, being the one to put her away is a far more tempting prize, plus by that point blackmail is off the table, as she wouldn't have enough men that she could reach to pull it off.

ReturnOfFable
Oct 9, 2012

No tears, only dreams.
I can't vote five enough and we are only two updates in. This is going to be great.

Loxbourne
Apr 6, 2011

Tomorrow, doom!
But now, tea.
Wait, what the gently caress?

I came into Carmen late, it seems. I don't recognise the teletype or this version of the game...assuming I can tell truth from finely-spun fiction here.

Oh, I can tell this is going to be a wild ride.

Nemo2342
Nov 26, 2007

Have A Day




Nap Ghost
This was one of the first games I ever owned when we got our first Macintosh. Funnily enough, my mother didn't pay attention when she bought it, so we ended up with the monochrome version instead of one of the fancier ones, which kind of fits right in with the noir-sytle of this LP.

And yes, Lynne is probably the perfect person to be the chief. That brings back a lot of memories of watching the Where in the World gameshow in the afternoons when I got home from school.

Nyaa
Jan 7, 2010
Like, Nyaa.

:colbert:
I hope we get to vote for the underling who work for Carmen. :allears:

berryjon
May 30, 2011

I have an invasion to go to.

The one, The only. Accept no substitutes.

Galaga Galaxian
Apr 23, 2009

What a childish tactic!
Don't you think you should put more thought into your battleplan?!


Wait a minute. Is that.... :raise:



Ohhh poo poo. :drat:

[Edit] Way late, but I don't loving care, this is gonna be amazing.

[edit] Thread is already gold. :haw:

Galaga Galaxian fucked around with this message at 02:19 on Jul 27, 2014

Drakenel
Dec 2, 2008

The glow is a guide, my friend. Though it falls to you to avert catastrophe, you will never fight alone.
Wait, which one was Hale again? So many submissions.

Jobbo_Fett
Mar 7, 2014

Slava Ukrayini

Clapping Larry

Drakenel posted:

Wait, which one was Hale again? So many submissions.

BiggerJ posted:

Name: Zachary "Zack" Hale
Quirk: Is, among other brilliant traits, a polyglot with an eidetic memory, but doesn't take his job anywhere near as seriously as he should. Chooses the worst times to be casual.
Motivation: The thrill of doing what is believed to be impossible. Carmen isn't even like a force of nature, she's like a force of the universe. Catching her is like dividing by zero.

Unless there was a second Hale

Bobbin Threadbare
Jan 2, 2009

I'm looking for a flock of urbanmechs.

Jobbo_Fett posted:

Unless there was a second Hale

But don't take the quirk and motivation as a given. Remember, Chewbot said there would be cherry-picking.

BiggerJ
May 21, 2007

What shall we do with him? A permaban, perhaps? Probate him for a few years? Or...shall we employ a big red custom title? You, the goons of SA, shall decide his fate.
I wonder if Chewbot even knew about the animated series. Inversely, I grew up on that one and, living in Australia, didn't learn about the game show for years. Carmen is many things to many people.

Speaking of which, I love the idea of the villain manipulating you so much that she's basically your boss. That's why catching her feels so satisfying - it's the only thing that happens that's not supposed to happen.

Color Printer posted:

So that's who that actress was! I recognized the Chief and her voice from Where in Time came through clear as a loving bell. Amazing. :allears:

She was originally the Chief on the beloved game show and crossed over to three of the games. Another of the games was instead based on the animated series.

BiggerJ fucked around with this message at 03:10 on Jul 27, 2014

Section Z
Oct 1, 2008

Wait, this is the Moon.
How did I even get here?

Pillbug
More love of your choice of chief :allears:

I wonder what grim turn Rockcapella has taken.

Aces High
Mar 26, 2010

Nah! A little chocolate will do




Does that mean Ivy's already out working? Assuming it is Zack that we are following right now

Where on Earth was a great cartoon :colbert:

Oblivion4568238
Oct 10, 2012

The Inquisition.
What a show.
The Inquisition.
Here. We. Go.
College Slice
I can already tell this is going to be a great thread. I didn't speak up during the character phase, but that's because I couldn't possibly top the submissions already there. I'm definitely surprised to see such an old-fashioned Carmen game, noir extras not being counted. I maybe saw the game show once, but I definitely played and enjoyed Where in Time and once played... whichever one involves the Tower of Babel. Don't think I finished that one.

habeasdorkus
Nov 3, 2013

Royalty is a continuous shitposting motion.
So happy that the Chief is in the mix. I loved that gameshow so much back in the day.

Rangpur
Dec 31, 2008

gently caress's sake, you can draw too?

I had this bookmarked after the first update but the Chief actually got me psyched. Should be a fun thread. Chin up, Hale! I hear if you make the arrest, they'll fly you into anywhere in the continental United States.

SporkOfTruth
Sep 1, 2006

this kid walked up to me and was like man schmitty your stache is ghetto and I was like whatever man your 3b look like a dishrag.

he was like damn.
Lynne Fuckin' Thigpen. You're the best, Chewbot.

Pvt.Scott
Feb 16, 2007

What God wants, God gets, God help us all
Lynne Thigpen was no CCH Pounder, but who is?

chiasaur11
Oct 22, 2012



Pvt.Scott posted:

Lynne Thigpen was no CCH Pounder, but who is?

Let me guess, I know this one...

CCH Pounder?

Danny Glands
Jan 26, 2013

Possible thermal failure (CPU on fire?)
Lynne Thigpen as Acme's Chief once again. I'm so hooked on this now.

Chewbot
Dec 2, 2005

My Revenge Meat!


Crupper and Hale step off the plane to a dearth of fanfare. Not even a man holding a sign.

Where do we start?
We’ve got safehouses in the foreign ministry of most major cities. So far Carmen either hasn’t infiltrated them or she’s leaving them alone on purpose.
We can send memos but that’s about it. We stopped using phones, oh, about a year ago. Practically morse code technology for us.

The taxi ride to the Embassy smells like beets.



Upon arrival, a man who looks like he's smeared a can of shoe-shine over his upper lip greets them with a practiced European accent. He brings the detectives to a secluded part of the building where a print-out has already arrived from ACME.



Fine, we won’t stay long. I’m sure the thief’s already moved on to another country, we just need to figure out where. Hale, leave your bags. Time to check the crime scene.

The ambassador talks up the Kremlin on the ride over. It’s not a building, it’s a complex including five palaces, four cathedrals and a fortified wall with towers. It’s been completely locked down by the military. After extensive paperwork, the detectives pass through gates manned by guards with automatic rifles.



Take us to the church.

Hale stands between slender walls made of wood and covered with painted scenes from antiquity, rising to a single dome. Crupper convinces the ambassador to try once more to gain access to the main palace, leaving the detectives alone in the small cathedral.

That should give us a few minutes.
Two days ago I would have said that the “Keys to the Kremlin” was just an expression. Apparently it’s a symbolic item the Tzars passed down to the next in line. What did I tell you, Hale? Worthless junk.
Alright, start looking. Chances are good what we want is on the wrong side of these tourist rails.
How do you know the evidence is here instead of the palace?
This ain’t my first rodeo, kid.

After twenty minutes, Hale notices Crupper working hard at a particular pillar. He thumps it from several different angles.

What is it?
Hollow.

A large panel creaks open on recessed hinges, when Crupper’s fingers find a thin latch holding it shut, disguised as a wood painting of the Virgin Mary. “poo poo,” murmurs Crupper, sounding more upset that he found something, than surprised.



These cells all have women with bruised faces in them.
And you want to leave them here?
Somebody wanted us to find this place, and I’ll be damned if I get sent to a Siberian gulag because we were snooping around in some commie politician’s private sex prison. We’re leaving!
We can’t just-
We’ll report it to ACME when we get out of here, godDAMMIT! NOW!

Crupper closes the panel behind him, taking care to wipe off prints with his sleeve, and heel-toes it out the cathedral like a boot camp cadet. He says nothing, asks nothing, and looks straight ahead until returning with Hale to their room in the embassy. Twenty minutes later he says something.

You ever see a movie where they find something horrible underground and don’t get caught on the way out? No. It’s never happened before. We’re the first. Look at my hands, I’m still shaking.
There’s no heater in here.
It’s not the cold! I did NOT ask to be back in the field. All I want right now... is to finish this case, go home, drink something hard, maybe kill myself.
And we still don’t have a lead on who we’re following or where he went.
Maybe we do.

Hale holds up the bible he found in the dungeon. It falls open to a page pierced by a silver pin with a diamond-topped head.

Jesus. I know who left that. But that's just a calling card, not a clue.
Wait, Hale, did you take evidence from a crime scene?
It’s a… problem. I have.
It seemed strange to find a King James version of the bible in a Russian Orthodox church.

Crupper starts twitching worse than before.

What’s the pin marking?
Luke 1:24.
That’s what we need to figure out. That’s where we’re going.
What about ACME?
I’m not sending one drat message until I’ve got at least one foot on a plane out of here!


:siren: If it wasn't obvious, goons, you're going to need to figure this one out for the story to progress. You've got everything you need, so work together! Here's a hint: it's not just a country, it's a place. You've got 48 hours before something bad happens. :siren:

Chewbot fucked around with this message at 14:10 on Jul 27, 2014

Chicken Doodle
May 16, 2007

I'm going to make a wild guess (Cause I suck at mysteries):

London.

Bible verse talks about Elizabeth...

Silver pin, Diamond head... Diamond jubilee?

King James version of the Bible, obviously.

JT Jag
Aug 30, 2009

#1 Jaguars Sunk Cost Fallacy-Haver
24 And after those days his wife Elisabeth conceived, and hid herself five months, saying,

Gut instinct says London.

thetoughestbean
Apr 27, 2013

Keep On Shroomin
"And after those days his wife Elisabeth conceived, and hid herself five months, saying,"

Luke Chapter 1 Verse 24

The verse is talking about Elisabeth, the wife of Zacharias, cousin of the Virgin Mary, and mother of John the Baptist.

Zacharias was made mute after doubting the word of God saying that he would have a son named John, believing that he and his wife were too old. After an argument about what the child would be named, with tradition saying that the son should have the same name as Zacharias and Elisabeth saying that the child would have the name John, Zachiarias wrote the "the child will be named John," giving him back the power of speech.

When Mary, then pregnant with Jesus, visited the much more pregnant Elisabeth, apparently John leaped in the womb, and Elisabeth blessed Mary with what would become the Hail Mary.

I'm good at religion. If people want me to go into more detail about the significance of the verse or of the significance King James Bible, go ahead and ask.

Added Space
Jul 13, 2012

Free Markets
Free People

Curse you Hayard-Gunnes!
If we want to get specific, the Sea Containers House in London was decorated for Elizabeth's Diamond Jubilee with a photograph taken at her Silver Jubilee - neatly containing all elements of the clue in a single location.


edit: If we're talking about imprisoned women, Elizabeth the First was imprisoned in the Tower of London prior to her reign. Her successor, King James VI & I, was the James who authorized the KJV; although he's not specifically linked to the Tower and the pin doesn't enter into it.

Added Space fucked around with this message at 08:55 on Jul 27, 2014

chiasaur11
Oct 22, 2012



Interesting cut off point.

Gut says five months matters. And the same gut says finding a verse about a woman who locked herself away in a room full of women locked up in a dungeon isn't a coincidence.

So.

Hmn.

aegof
Mar 2, 2011

Somehow, I knew I was gonna enjoy following this.

Roobanguy
May 31, 2011

Ugh, look at all these people pretending that they haven't played the game before. :rolleyes:

this is a cool lp

thetoughestbean
Apr 27, 2013

Keep On Shroomin

Added Space posted:

If we want to get specific, the Sea Containers House in London was decorated for Elizabeth's Diamond Jubilee with a photograph taken at her Silver Jubilee - neatly containing all elements of the clue in a single location.

The only issue is that the Diamond Jubilee took place after 1985. Unless the timeline is weird, it won't happen for another 27 years.

A reference to Elizabeth in a decidedly English Bible? Certainly a clue suggesting English involvement, or at least that someone wants us to think of England. We should be careful, though. The USSR was aggressively atheist and shut down most churches, especially the big, gaudy ones. The Russians who had access to churches were those in the government, (which might be why it was hiding the women; it wasn't open to the public) and those who were religious were probably Russian Orthodox.

Basically, a person walked into a Kremlin controlled structure filled with political prisoners and dropped a book that was essentially a giant "gently caress you" to the Russians. That person has balls.

Can we ask the KGB if there were any known anti-USSR individuals with ties to the UK in area before the theft?

Chewbot
Dec 2, 2005

My Revenge Meat!

thetoughestbean posted:

The only issue is that the Diamond Jubilee took place after 1985. Unless the timeline is weird, it won't happen for another 27 years.

A reference to Elizabeth in a decidedly English Bible? Certainly a clue suggesting English involvement, or at least that someone wants us to think of England. We should be careful, though. The USSR was aggressively atheist and shut down most churches, especially the big, gaudy ones. The Russians who had access to churches were those in the government, (which might be why it was hiding the women; it wasn't open to the public) and those who were religious were probably Russian Orthodox.

Basically, a person walked into a Kremlin controlled structure filled with political prisoners and dropped a book that was essentially a giant "gently caress you" to the Russians. That person has balls.

Can we ask the KGB if there were any known anti-USSR individuals with ties to the UK in area before the theft?

Now this is a thinkin' man. It probably isn't as simple as Elizabeth = London.

If we don't make any real progress in the next 24 hours I'll help out a bit. In the meantime, I don't think Crupper plans to introduce himself to the KGB any time soon. Keep in mind that whoever set this all up is probably just following orders, not acting on his own.

Kaboom Dragoon
May 7, 2010

The greatest of feasts

On a related note, in the history of the organization, there was only ever one person who managed to escape KGB headquarters.

He was allowed to escape. The KGB were banking on him running right to his confederates, which he did, allowing them to capture several much sought-after targets.

With that in mind, did we really escape, or were we allowed to walk?

Added Space
Jul 13, 2012

Free Markets
Free People

Curse you Hayard-Gunnes!
Well, there was also a Russian Elizabeth. She commissioned the Smolny Cathedral in St. Petersburg (in 1986, Leningrad). It was originally to be a nunnery for her and contained an altar to the biblical Elizabeth in that verse. The cathedral was looted and sacked by the Communists, and was converted to a concert hall in 1982. Seems appropriate.

Kliff
Feb 7, 2009

Forgotten by everyone? Kanako's fault.
So, here's my question. Back in '85, was there a place in the world known for diamonds that England had its hands in, or are we looking for the Smolny Cathedral after all?

Kaboom Dragoon
May 7, 2010

The greatest of feasts

Kliff posted:

So, here's my question. Back in '85, was there a place in the world known for diamonds that England had its hands in, or are we looking for the Smolny Cathedral after all?

India springs to mind, as well as Africa, but the empire was long gone by that point.

chiasaur11
Oct 22, 2012



Kaboom Dragoon posted:

On a related note, in the history of the organization, there was only ever one person who managed to escape KGB headquarters.

He was allowed to escape. The KGB were banking on him running right to his confederates, which he did, allowing them to capture several much sought-after targets.

With that in mind, did we really escape, or were we allowed to walk?

We're helping them deal with a problem, while letting them save face if it's too hard by blaming the failure on ACME instead of having to go with in-house purges.

Or you know. Fall guy if it really goes bad.

They're letting us walk, but it's not anything to worry about.

Yet.

Bregor
May 31, 2013

People are idiots, Leslie.

quote:

disguised as a wood painting of the Virgin Mary

These cells all have women with bruised faces in them.

a silver pin with a diamond-topped head

It seemed strange to find a King James version of the bible in a Russian Orthodox church.

Luke 1:24.

Here's a hint: it's not just a country, it's a place.

Keep in mind that whoever set this all up is probably just following orders, not acting on his own.

Pulled all the quotes I found interesting, just spitballing here...

There are silver and diamond mines in Australia (the pin), a longtime British colony (following orders).

It was also where England sent many of its violent convicts, including women. Also the Catholic church is pretty weird in having plenty of female saints but no women in the clergy. Could manifest here as the abused women.

The KJV and the quote point to 17th century England, Elizabeth (British Empire) and Mary. Also the hidden latch is a painting of Mary.

Gonna say St. Mary's Cathedral in Sydney. Still think the Tower of London is the more likely destination but I thought I'd throw it out there.

Elfface
Nov 14, 2010

Da-na-na-na-na-na-na
IRON JONAH
Just from Elizabeth and the diamond the Crown Jewels spring to mind. Includes the second largest diamond in the world (The very largest until 1985), mounted in the royal sceptre. Kept on display at the Tower of London.

But it seems almost too obvious. Like a trap set by Carmen.

Chewbot
Dec 2, 2005

My Revenge Meat!
Where have you been?
Walking. Helps me think. I can't help but think the diamond's got to factor in somehow.
I don't think so, I know this guy. Haven't seen him in a long time, though, he's part of the old crew. Carmen's been using experienced agents lately, even though they're getting up in years. Which is somewhat concerning. I got his dossier somewhere.



The pin just means we're looking in the right place.
Ok, what else? The book was in a hidden room full of women being hidden referencing a passage about being hid.
We've only got that one line to go on. "And after those days his wife Elizabeth conceived, and hid herself..." The place has to be in that one line. It's an English bible referencing an English queen but I'm not seeing it. As far as I know, none of the Elizabeths had anything note-worthy about conceiving. Or hiding.
Wait a second, say her name again?
Elizabeth.
No, that's not what this version says. Look. Elisabeth.
Huh.

Chewbot fucked around with this message at 14:10 on Jul 27, 2014

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TheMcD
May 4, 2013

Monaca / Subject N 2024
---------
Despair will never let you down.
Malice will never disappoint you.

...Austria?

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