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George: "She saw my internet history Jerry!" Jerry: "Internet history? Why didn't you delete it or browse in private mode?" George: "You can do that?! Here I am going through wiki pages so she thinks I'm smart and you can delete it?!"
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Jul 28, 2014 02:18
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 00:57 |
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GBS 1.4 - Free Carpet Samples Edition > Post your favorite modern day seinfeld fanfiction
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Jul 28, 2014 02:19
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the j.e.r.r.y. system
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Jul 28, 2014 02:21
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Gaunab posted:George: "She saw my internet history Jerry!" Jerry and Elaine are talking in Jerry's apartment. Elaine: So the date goes fine and he invites me up to his apartment. Jerry: Go on.... Elaine: When we get up there he goes into the bathroom for a second. So I'm waiting out in the living room and I notice that, on a shelf, he has a collection of anime figurines. Jerry: No! *audience laughs* Elaine: Yes! And when I walked up to the shelf to get a closer look, I saw that there was a drop of cum on one of the figurines! *audience laughs* Jerry looks aghast. Jerry: Not only does he brazenly display a collection of anime figurines, he has the indescretion to leave drops of cum on them?! Elaine: I know Jerry, I know! Jerry: So what did you do? Elaine: When he came back I made an excuse and got the hell out of there. *audience laughs* Jerry: Well, I think you m- Kramer bursts in through the door. *audience applauds* Kramer: Jerry! Oh, hey Elaine. Elaine: Hey. Kramer: Jerry, I need to borrow your computer. Jerry: My computer? What for? Kramer: You know, I'm mining those bitcoins! *audience laughs* Jerry: Bitcoins? Really? Don't you know that's all just a waste of time? Kramer: Not a waste of time. I know a guy - Ronny - he got super rich doing this! He lives in a fancy penthouse uptown now and everything! Jerry: And everything. Why do people always add "and everything" to things? "And everything," like it's possible to have everything. *audience laughs* Kramer: So can I borrow it? Jerry: Absolutely not! Elaine: Why can't he borrow it? He's just mining buttcoins or whatever. Kramer: Bitcoins! *audience laughs* Jerry: Eh, I just don't like the whole idea of it. A computer is a very personal thing! It's like a big collection of your habits and doings - I wouldn't feel comfortable just letting other people use it! Kramer: Oh, come on Jerry! It's a goldmine! Jerry: No, and that's final. Kramer: Fine! You'll regret it you know. I would've shared some of it with you. Jerry: Yeah, yeah, sure. Kramer: You'll see! Kramer leaves. *audience applauds* Jerry sighs. Jerry: Anyway, what are you going to do about figurine guy? Elaine: He keeps calling me but I'm just going to ignore him and hope he gives up. Jerry: Good idea.
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Jul 28, 2014 02:27
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finally comedy i'm told is good from a perspective i understand
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Jul 28, 2014 02:27
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Izumi Konata posted:Kramer: Not a waste of time. I know a guy - Bob Sacamano - he got super rich doing this! He lives in a fancy penthouse uptown now and everything! fixed
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Jul 28, 2014 02:43
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iphone? *laff* no i don't! *laff* i text, i never phone. *hoots and laff* it could stop working as a phone and, i wouldn't even know. *yelling over the laffs* wouldn't even know!
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Jul 28, 2014 03:16
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If I replaced all the laugh tracks with fart sounds, would that be better for you goons?
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Jul 28, 2014 03:19
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Jul 28, 2014 03:27
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kramer is my nigga
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Jul 28, 2014 03:29
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FordPRefectLL posted:how many plots in this show would be resolved in a normal way if it took place 10-15 years later and everyone had smartphones A poo poo ton.
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Jul 28, 2014 03:30
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Al Borland posted:A poo poo ton. yep, now george would get it up and txt a pic to that bitch gf of jerrys.
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Jul 28, 2014 03:31
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Izumi Konata posted:GEORGE: It's over, Jerry! Over! She found it! That whole thread is a work of art. Waltzing Along posted:yep, now george would get it up and txt a pic to that bitch gf of jerrys. George would end up using his mom's cellphone to send a dick pic to some girl and his mom would find it, but the picture would be so oddly taken that she wouldn't recognize its a penis and would be showing it to everyone trying to figure out what the picture was of. DINNER PARTY AT GEORGE'S PARENTS HOUSE: George's Mom: "But I didn't take this I don't know what it could be it looks like a baby's arm." Guest 1: "Well I don't know I think it looks like a mushroom." **George's Mom shows it to Guest 2**: "What do you think it is?" *George is visibly getting frustrated in the room as he tries the grab the phone being passed around from guest to guest.* Guest 2: "I don't know it certainly has an odd and un-comforting look to it though." George *in a fit of uncontrollable anger*: "ITS MY PENIS MA! ALRIGHT? I TOOK A PICTURE OF MY PENIS TO SEND TO A GIRL!" *The girl can be seen standing behind George as he turns around* Al Borland fucked around with this message at 03:42 on Jul 28, 2014 |
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Jul 28, 2014 03:37
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Lmao Curb sucks rear end hole turds
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Jul 28, 2014 03:41
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literally everything sucks imo
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Jul 28, 2014 03:41
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Dr. Tim Whatley posted:Lmao Curb sucks rear end hole turds Yah, Larry David is one of those people you want to reach through the set and throttle. Why? I have no idea, he just bugs the poo poo out of me.
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Jul 28, 2014 03:43
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FordPRefectLL posted:no i was gonna watch this for the true to life relationship drama i can really see a bunch of myself in So you're an ugly, annoying jew?
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Jul 28, 2014 03:45
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Philthy posted:Yah, Larry David is one of those people you want to reach through the set and throttle. Why? I have no idea, he just bugs the poo poo out of me. p. sure thats the point of the show
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Jul 28, 2014 03:48
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Philthy posted:Yah, Larry David is one of those people you want to reach through the set and throttle. Why? I have no idea, he just bugs the poo poo out of me. it's because you're an anti-semite
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Jul 28, 2014 03:51
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you wanna know what seinfeld would be like if it were on now? it would be like curb, except funny.
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Jul 28, 2014 03:52
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Seinfeld and Simpsons were the best network shows of the 90s, OP, for whatever that's worth.
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Jul 28, 2014 03:59
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JERRY: "She's a bad texter." GEORGE: "What do you mean?" JERRY: "Well, things are great when we're together but when she replies back through texts it's like I'm talking to a different person." GEORGE: "That's awful!" JERRY: "I tell her I had a great time last night- and she replies back "Me too"" GEORGE: "To the word or the number?" JERRY: "The number"
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Jul 28, 2014 04:04
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CaptainHollywood posted:JERRY: "She's a bad texter." 
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Jul 28, 2014 04:06
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still waiting for a seinfeld/sunny crossover
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Jul 28, 2014 04:13
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Gaunab posted:still waiting for a seinfeld/sunny crossover sunny is not worthy
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Jul 28, 2014 04:25
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Gaunab posted:still waiting for a seinfeld/sunny crossover Danny Devito would have been a great Bob Sacamano
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Jul 28, 2014 04:30
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No DON'T OP THAT SHOW IS BAD!
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Jul 28, 2014 04:33
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Waltzing Along posted:kramer is my nigga never said after 2006
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Jul 28, 2014 04:38
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lmao at people who havent seen every seinfeld episode against their will #ninetieskidz
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Jul 28, 2014 04:44
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Someone post that Seinfeld d&d comic.
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Jul 28, 2014 05:16
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drat.
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Jul 28, 2014 05:28
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(GEORGE ENTERS APARTMENT AND PULLS OUT HIS CELL PHONE) GEORGE: Jerry! You gotta watch this! (GEORGE SHOWS JERRY THE PHONE) JERRY: It's just some fail video! I hate these things! GEORGE: (PANICKED) Just keep watching it! JERRY: But why.... oh my god. GEORGE: You see! My life is over! I'm screwed! JERRY: What are you doing there anyway? GEORGE: It was just an adjustment Jerry, AN ADJUSTMENT! JERRY: You don't adjust things... in that area.... like that. Certainly not in public. GEORGE: I DIDN'T KNOW! JERRY: Don't worry, maybe no one will see it. GEORGE: IT'S GONNA GO VIRAL, JERRY! I CAN'T BE VIRAL! JERRY: No way, look at you. You aren't viral material! (KRAMER ENTERS) KRAMER: Hey, Jerry. Hey crotchgrabber! GEORGE: YOU SEE!!
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Jul 28, 2014 05:32
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happyhippy posted:Don't, just go straight to Curb Your Enthusiasm. I actually started watching Curb Your Enthusiasm yesterday and it is pretty great.
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Jul 28, 2014 05:33
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Samuel L. ACKSYN posted:(GEORGE ENTERS APARTMENT AND PULLS OUT HIS CELL PHONE)
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Jul 28, 2014 05:34
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Samuel L. ACKSYN posted:(GEORGE ENTERS APARTMENT AND PULLS OUT HIS CELL PHONE)
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Jul 28, 2014 05:50
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this thread is so much better than curb
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Jul 28, 2014 05:53
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FordPRefectLL posted:i'm 26 tho i'm 29 and love seinfeld, what's wrong with you.
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Jul 28, 2014 06:00
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lmfao this thread
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Jul 28, 2014 06:03
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Meg From Family Guy posted:lmfao this thread whenever i see your name i just want to tell meg to shut up.
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Jul 28, 2014 06:05
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 00:57 |
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The Auto-Liker Jerry: "It's my statuses, she keeps liking my statuses. Every single thing I post, 'Amanda likes this, Amanda likes this'" George: "And that's bad?" Jerry: "It's not good" George: "How is it not good? She likes your statuses." Jerry: "Well, yes, but since she likes every single one of them, I can't tell which ones she sincerely (finger quotes) 'likes.' Does she actually like them, or is she afraid to forgo the liking?" Elaine: "It's not a big deal. Once again, Jerry, you're just taking a little thing and letting it FWOOOM" (expanding hands like an explosion) Elaine: "alllll outta proportion!" George: "The only person who ever likes my statuses is my mother." Kramer slides in. Pause for applause. Kramer: Hey, Jerry, can I borrow a cellphone charger? Jerry (apathetic): It's on the counter. Kramer does something clumsy on his way to get the charger. Kramer: That's great, Jerry, thanks... hey, can I borrow like eight more chargers? Jerry: How many cellphone chargers could you possibly n-- you know what? I don't want to know. I don't have any others. Kramer (tongue click, gesture): Thanks big time! (leaves) Jerry: But that's not the only thing. She also likes her own posts. Elaine (disgusted): She's a self-liker? Jerry (exasperated): She's an auto-liker! Elaine: An auto-liker! George: George does not like this. Nameless_Steve fucked around with this message at 06:22 on Jul 28, 2014 |
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Jul 28, 2014 06:20
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