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My neighbors are crack dealers. There was a drive by shooting last year.
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Jul 31, 2014 18:24
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 16:54 |
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I lived on the first floor of an apartment building in Boston for a year. One of the neighbors in an adjacent building was a crazy off his meds/needed to be medicated/complete with crazy hair/conspiracy theory/smoked too much pot 40 year old that hung out with 20 year olds type of guy. I walked to work every morning & he would usually be out and about the neighborhood. One day he asked me for a cigarette and I obliged & then he proceeded to walk with me like the entire first mile to work like we'd been friends for life or some poo poo. He used to do that stuff kind of frequently and would always talk about weird poo poo and act creepy so I would usually make sure he wasnt around when I left my home if I had a choice. After a few weeks my roommate and friend told me about some weird neighborhood guy that would basically do the same thing and lo and behold it was the same dude. As we lived there longer he either started acting slightly more tolerable or normal, or we just got used to his bullshit, who knows. We'd hang on the stoop or smoke/watch tv inside sometimes, which ended up being a pretty big mistake. As soon as he knew the layout of our apartment if we didn't answer the buzzer or our phones he would just go to the windows and ask why we werent hanging out with him. Sometimes he'd come to my bedroom window & ask me if I was jerking off and tell me i should stop/hurry up so we could hang out. After that lease was up I moved a couple miles away but my roommate moved one street away. The guy ofc managed to find out where my friend/former roommate lived and haunted him there too. The next time my friend moved he specifically moved to the next neighborhood over to avoid seeing this guy He was just a really weird dude that had some weird coterie of young kids (i guess college age, really, but like freshmen) and would say really creepy poo poo to girls. that being said even at the time i just enjoyed him for the fuckin weirdo he was
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Jul 31, 2014 18:36
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had a neighbor that everyone called junkyard jim because his front and backyard was a literal junkyard. rusted cars, boats, refrigerators, uncut grass etc. someone went in his house and apparently his bed was literally like 10 mattresses stacked almost to the ceiling what was cool though was that it was on a canal and at the edge of his backyard he had a toilet just kind of sitting in the grass. for Christmas he would decorate it with Christmas lights
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Jul 31, 2014 19:22
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I've pretty much always lived next to amiable people, leaving me without interesting neighbor stories, which is the shittiest neighbor thing to do of all.
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Jul 31, 2014 19:24
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The other afternoon my dad was babysitting my twin 18 month olds and some random neighbor called the police on him for making too much noise. The cop was cool, he was laughing so hard at the concept that a neighbor thought that anyone can control the noise output of infants
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Jul 31, 2014 21:44
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Don't dare bring them to the pool. 
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Jul 31, 2014 21:50
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Three Olives posted:Don't dare bring them to the pool. If my kids start shrieking anywhere in public i take them away or stick food in their mouths. The nearest neighbor is 25 feet away from my dad so I don't know wtf. Drunk Nerds fucked around with this message at 22:33 on Jul 31, 2014 |
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Jul 31, 2014 22:04
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FordPRefectLL posted:americans are so terrified of that poo poo lol this nigga's bragging about eating roach meat
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Jul 31, 2014 22:23
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Robo Reagan posted:lol this nigga's bragging about eating roach meat was he also the goon who was bragging about going into an Ethiopian restaurant and ordering raw cow rectum (or the equivalent) and the owner personally came out to their table and shook their hand and said how cool they are because "gringos never order raw food" or something? that was hilarious
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Jul 31, 2014 22:53
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Xaris posted:was he also the goon who was bragging about going into an Ethiopian restaurant and ordering raw cow rectum (or the equivalent) and the owner personally came out to their table and shook their hand and said how cool they are because "gringos never order raw food" or something? RIP GOON
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Jul 31, 2014 23:39
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I've lived in a bunch of lovely places apparently populated mostly by crazy people so I have plenty of poo poo for this thread. For now I'll stick to just talking about the house next door which was very very cursed. So my folks moved into their house in the early 80s, and right next door lived a 95 year old guy and his 30ish year old paranoid schizo son. We never really knew much about the son except his dad told my folks to give him a call if they ever saw him outside and we usually didn't. Until his dad croaked sometime in the mid 80s. We wouldn't see the son for weeks at a time and then I guess he would run out of meds and decide it was a good day to dismember kittens with machetes in his front yard while naked and then smear the blood all over himself while eating poop. The cops would show up, the guy would disappear for a while and all would be quiet until I guess he was released and enough time passed that whoever was checking up on him stopped and then it was naked animal death poop time. This happened maybe 4 or 5 times until one day in the early 90s I was walking home from school and he decided that maybe little girl needed to be chopped up this time. I saw him standing in the middle of my front yard holding the machete over his dead. One half of a chopped up boa constrictor was wrapped around his neck and he was wearing nothing else. I saw this from across the street and decided to scream and run in the other direction thankfully but that's the last time we saw that dude. After that the house was just vacant for a few years and then someone put it up on the market. Enter neighbors we considered much worse than this... So this family of 3 moves in. The father, Chris Sr. worked at best buy as a salesman and sold coke. His second trophy wife accompanied him along with his son Chris Jr. who was 2-3 years younger than me. They moved into the house when Chris Jr. was in middle school still and I was in high school, and eventually my senior year we both went to the same high school which was where I ran into him directly the most. Both Chrises were completely loving insane. I don't remember when they started trying to harass us directly but I remember shortly after they moved in my dad would go and try to complain to Chris Sr that they were parking their cars in our yard and wrecking the lawn and things of that nature... I remember the response being Chris Sr. whipped his pants off and started pissing all over parts of our yard while yelling as loud as he could that the whole neighborhood was his toilet to do whatever he fuckin wanted and eat poo poo and die if you don't like it. They would do random crazy poo poo all the time and then when asked about it or called out they would loudly proclaim that X action is crazy and why would they do such a thing? They would randomly during the day come over and slap our windows to see if we were home and if we didn't respond they'd poop in the front yard and take off. Chris Jr. had some sort of thing about my mom and he would hide under the windows of my parents room behind the bushes in our front yard and jack off while staring in the window. He did this a few times and once he took so long a cop showed up right as he was finishing. I got to see Chris Jr. get tackled as he tried to run off back to his own house and pretend that it wasn't him. He was actually screaming "IT WASN'T MEEEEEEEEE" with his pants around his ankles and 2 cops on his back while he struggled in the middle of our yard. At first my dad really tried to handle things between Chris Sr. and himself so when they'd be doing this poo poo my dad would chase them off with a shotgun and call the cops. Eventually we just started calling the cops all the time and this actually turned out to be a really good thing because this paper trail later was used by the FBI. More on that later. We pretty much never saw the stepmom and when we did she would just yell at us that she had nothing to do with Chris Jr. and Sr. and they weren't her problem. The thing was is somehow with all of the proceeds from the cocaine Chris Sr. was selling they always had just enough cash to keep out of jail somehow, as well as buy expensive poo poo for Chris Jr. all the time. His 8th grade year he got not one but 3 different yachts. Chris Jr and his friends sunk all 3. Oh yeah, Chris's friends! I didn't know anyone who he was friends with but they were over his house all the time hanging out with him for the exclusive purpose of loving with Chris Jr and Sr. Chris Jr's signature thing at school was having tons of Nikes and always bragging about how he has X rare super expensive whatevers. Every single time his friends came over by the end of the day they would hold him down somewhere on his front lawn or driveway, pry his shoes off, and then set them on fire with lighter fluid. Every single time. I saw some other kids steal his shoes at school too, it was basically a neighborhood joke. Chris Sr. would also be in the yard every single time watching his teenage son getting held down and robbed by his peers. Chris Sr. would then go off and presumably buy new shoes. Eventually those same guys would come by and rip off the antenna from Chris Jr's truck that he got in 9th grade. (I'm not sure exactly how old Chris Jr. was... he wasn't more than 2 or 3 years younger than me but he was 4-5 years behind me in grade so he was 17 or 18 in 9th grade) They did this every single week until the final arrests of Chris Sr and Jr. Somewhere along the line we had a period of peace and quiet for many months where we didn't hear from either of the weirdos and assumed they gave up and were busy being weird in their own house. Then unmarked cars started following me home from school and my after school job. They followed my sister. And my parents. Then they staked out our house and actually found out what was happening. So one previous day the mailman came by and found a 2 pound brick of coke sitting in our mailbox. He alerted the cops who wound up working with the FBI who was following us all around! It turns out the Chrises had figured out our household schedule perfectly and knew when we were all gone during the day. They used that time to arrange dead drops of coke or cash out of their next door neighbors mailbox because this would clearly prevent them from ever being fingered for it. While we were followed (the agent was nice enough to tell us, we didn't notice) they noticed the stack of bizarre police reports and caught Chris Jr and Sr in the act while staking out our house. We wound up giving permission to use our mailbox as a sting and they got video of Chris Sr stuffing a pound of coke in the mailbox, then his son coming by an hour later to pick up the cash. He then jerked off on our doorstep. They both wound up getting arrested, everything in their house got seized as evidence. Chris Sr got something like 15 years for trafficking and mail fraud, Chris Jr got 5 years and got slapped as a sex offender. He later got out of jail and OD'd on meth or something. I held a small party to celebrate his death because gently caress that weirdo, I'm still surprised he didn't turn out to be a serial rapist or killer.
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Aug 1, 2014 00:07
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i moved into my very first apartment when I was 18, I grew up in the country and I was moving into a city. On my move in day I parked in my neighbors parking spot, cuz that's where my landlord told me to park. neighbor gets home, I'm in my room and I start hearing some douchebag scream "WHAT THE gently caress. I'M loving SICK OF THIS poo poo. JESUS CHRIST. YOU PARKED IN MY loving SPOT?" he comes stormin up the stairs hootin and hollarin. My dad was with me, nearing 55 at the time he was still muscular, and had two tattoo sleeves. Not to mention he grew up in the hood, was a marine in vietnam, and he's a sixth degree blackbelt in hapkido and tae kwon do. most find him intimidating. Neighbor didn't know this. He rounds the corner screamin his lungs off thinking he'd just be facing some college kid, to his surprise my dad was standing right in front of him. Dad didn't take any of this guys poo poo, he ran him into a wall and then put him on the floor into an armbar while the neighbor squealed like a pig being led to the slaughter. later(after my dad left) my neighbor came to apologize. at the time i was takin a massive slurry poo poo, he knocked on my door and I flushed the toilet as my response. he heard it and we never spoke.
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Aug 1, 2014 00:08
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Tristesse posted:I've lived in a bunch of lovely places apparently populated mostly by crazy people so I have plenty of poo poo for this thread. For now I'll stick to just talking about the house next door which was very very cursed. holy poo poo please tell me that was real and not just a C+P or fake.
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Aug 1, 2014 00:12
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Yeah that's not a fake post at all I lived that poo poo. Chris Jr and Sr got arrested in 2002 and Chris Jr died sometime around 2007 or so. EDIT: OH YEAH! The year before he died Chris Jr had a minor claim to fame as a "Florida Man" story (yes this was all in Florida.) He apparently tried to mug an elderly lady in a parking garage and a 74 year old former senator beat him up and prevented the robbery. There used to be a news article about this online. Tristesse fucked around with this message at 00:27 on Aug 1, 2014 |
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Aug 1, 2014 00:15
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A couple years ago my neighbors got murdered. Wasn't a bad neighborhood or anything. The dad got shot, and two little girls (age 7 and 9) got stabbed, one a total of 17 times. Right around Christmas, too. Was a hosed up time.
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Aug 1, 2014 00:38
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Tristesse posted:Yeah that's not a fake post at all I lived that poo poo. Chris Jr and Sr got arrested in 2002 and Chris Jr died sometime around 2007 or so. The wacky coke trafficking was kind of a giveaway but yeah this post had Florida written all over it.
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Aug 1, 2014 00:40
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I didn't believe a word of that post until I learned it was set in Florida.
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Aug 1, 2014 00:46
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my neighbour pisses in 7-up cans then throws them out of her bedroom window.
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Aug 1, 2014 01:05
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ReptileChillock posted:I didn't believe a word of that post until I learned it was set in Florida.  I kinda believed it might have been a C+P from reddit or something but yeah once they mentioned Florida I was like oh yea, that makes a lot of sense actually...
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Aug 1, 2014 01:17
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VoxIsMyCowboy posted:my neighbour pisses in 7-up cans then throws them out of her bedroom window. More importantly - Does she let you watch? And how good are you catching them?
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Aug 1, 2014 03:04
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Delete post
Vyatich fucked around with this message at 04:46 on Oct 12, 2014 |
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Aug 1, 2014 03:31
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VoxIsMyCowboy posted:my neighbour pisses in 7-up cans then throws them out of her bedroom window. jw, how do you know theyre piss
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Aug 1, 2014 03:45
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Chairman Wao posted:I've pretty much always lived next to amiable people, leaving me without interesting neighbor stories, which is the shittiest neighbor thing to do of all. That means you're probably the bad neighbor they tell stories about
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Aug 1, 2014 05:43
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Fetus Tree posted:jw, how do you know theyre piss See? SEE? It's not just me!
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Aug 1, 2014 06:34
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In my old apartment building I had neighbors who thought it was okay to play their amp plugged in guitars at 1:00AM on Wednesday / Thursday night cause they were done with school and didn't have to work in the morning. They also howled like wolves in the night. This went on for about a year straight despite multiple complaints. loving student housing was the worst.
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Aug 1, 2014 07:39
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Couple houses down the street from my dad's place, there was a dude who sold crack. One time he got busted for doing a deal where he sold a guy crack for fifty bucks and half a pig (because soemone had gotten out of jail and they were going to have a party). When the cops showed up a bunch of people came to watch and someone stole the pig.
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Aug 1, 2014 07:59
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When I was five, my family rented an old Victorian house next to a crazy woman named Jean whose favorite pastime was calling the police on us. It seemed to happen most often when a black friend of my sister's stopped by. This went on regularly (say once to twice weekly) until the cops threatened to bring her in. She also always seemed to be staring out her windows at our house. My sisters would play a joke on their new friends: they'd tell the friend to look out a window on the east side of the house, but refuse to explain why. "Just do it" The friend would comply, open the shade and inevitably see Jean draw her curtains closed. It spooked a lot of kids. We had a tall, wooden privacy fence surrounding the back yard and a padlocked cellar door enclosed within. No one really went into the backyard as the density of its trees prevented much grass growth and as a result, it was just kind of ugly. As for the cellar, it was ill-lit with a dirt floor. The home had been adapted from a funeral parlour and we knew it was haunted, so you can imagine our terror when we started hearing noises coming from the basement. Then one day, my mother noticed someone had taken a goddamn bolt cutter to the cellar door out back. Never proven exactly, but the locked gate between our houses would ocasionally be found ajar. She also loving shot my sister's cat, who died from the injury. I don't know a good deal about that story since it's still considered an unpleasant thing you don't bring up. Anyway, we moved soon after.
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Aug 1, 2014 08:24
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I live in a big apartment building and my neighbors across were really nice, then one day they left their car parked in the handicapped spot outside and someone keyed it. Now they are really passive aggressive and close the lobby door in my face whenever I'm behind them. I didn't key their car.
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Aug 1, 2014 08:41
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Das Boo posted:The home had been adapted from a funeral parlour and we knew it was haunted, so you can imagine our terror when we started hearing noises coming from the basement. Then one day, my mother noticed someone had taken a goddamn bolt cutter to the cellar door out back. Never proven exactly, but the locked gate between our houses would ocasionally be found ajar. It probably was the crazy neighbor in your basement! I am so surprised your dad didn't shoot either of the neighbors. He really realllly should have. Holy poo poo on the machete guy.
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Aug 1, 2014 09:02
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One of my neighbour's dogs broke down the fence and killed my rabbits. She ended up in a protracted, extremely retarded battle with my landlady about getting the fence replaced, that ended when my landlady threatened to have the city rangers called on her dogs every time they got out of the yard. I have no idea why she was so adamant about how much the fence would cost to replace and what a burden it would be for her - she's renting too. Not sure if she's better or worse than my other neighbours, who offered the guy who came to replace the fences money to kill my chickens.
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Aug 1, 2014 09:45
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I am the lovely neighbour
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Aug 1, 2014 10:24
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 that lawn mower
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Aug 1, 2014 10:27
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MissEchelon posted:One of my neighbour's dogs broke down the fence and killed my rabbits. She ended up in a protracted, extremely retarded battle with my landlady about getting the fence replaced, that ended when my landlady threatened to have the city rangers called on her dogs every time they got out of the yard. I have no idea why she was so adamant about how much the fence would cost to replace and what a burden it would be for her - she's renting too. you're going to be murdered
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Aug 1, 2014 10:57
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plain blue jacket posted:you're going to be murdered Not if he murders her first. He knows what he must do.
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Aug 1, 2014 14:53
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 16:54 |
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I guess I could murder my neighbour and feed her to my chickens
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Aug 1, 2014 15:21
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